10 Month Old STILL Protesting Diaper Changes

Ok so we have something in common. I have a 14mth od baby boy he also hates to be changed hates to have his clothes changed so i always give him to play with i have also had to resort to giving him a bath serveral times a day since he never refuses a bubble bath it is sometimes the only way to change him without a fight now i have started something everytime i take his clothes off he runs to the bathroom for a bath.

My daughter does the same thing! Drives me crazy! She cries when I put anything over her head and flips on her belly anytime I change her diaper. There for a minute, I was holding her down, then I tried to put her diaper on while she was on her belly (not easy!), finally, I've started communicating with her. Amazingly I THINK it's working! I've really tried more and more to tell her what is going on and she is responding positively. ok, so when I go to put her shirt on, I'll tell her what I'm doing and look through the hole in the shirt and make faces. Then I'll count to 3 and slip it over her head. She still gets whiny when I put her arms through, but I do it real quick and then talk to her again about how good she did and it's all over! YAY! Then with the diaper, I say, "Ok, baby girl, mama's going to change your diaper- you ready? you gonna be a good girl?" From that point forward it's one word commands: either Stay, stay, stay, stay or hold, hold, hold. I started doing this to put her to bed too and it's worked the last few nights. "You ready to go night night? ok, I love you very much and now it's time for Ta-Ta to go night-night." I lay her down and she gets comfy. I'm sure I've jinxed myself now, but hopefully this will help some. Good luck!!

Hi Karine,
My 18 month was the exact same way since birth. What a struggle! I think some babies just don't like to be controlled. It finally got better when he was about 13 months, when I started letting him be in more control of the situation. Instead of using the changing table, he would cooperate much better if I laid a towel on the floor and asked him to lay down. He would laugh and lay down on his back by himself, rather than me putting him on the changing table. If he was happy at the start, it seemed to make the whole process easier. Also, by that time he was old enough to stick his feet in his shorts and push his own arm through the shirt hole, etc. He still hates it (and fights) when I hold his feet in the air to take a diaper off or put one on, but there is nothing I can do about that (oh, maybe pull-ups? I just had a thought).

You could try a couple of things. My first thought was to start teaching her how to dress herself. She may not really be able to do it for a couple more months (my second started early and was completely dressing herself by 16 months) but just her thinking she is doing it with you helping may work. Then I read that she is better while sitting but cries when you lie her down. You can do most dressing while she is standing up holding onto your shoulders. But you may want to consider chiropractic. She may have a spot that bothers her. Does she protest other times on her back? Not all chiropractors work with children. I love mine so let me know if you are over in the Winter Garden area.

I know you've tried everything and this advice won't make her sit still and be happy about getting changed, but I just wanted to point out a couple of things.... Be careful that no matter how upset she is getting (and no matter how hard it is to do so) be sure that you are as calm as you can be. As you get agitated, she can feel your tension and the situation elevates. Be very conscious of your tone of voice and noise level when you speak. Then just pretend that she is cooperating while you calmly and quietly talk through the whole process. I know you're thinking I'm crazy and it won't help, but think of it this way... if you were in a fender bender or some other altercation with an adult, if they walk up and start screaming at you, you can do 2 things-- you can get just as upset and scream back at them, which elevates the situation, or you can very calmly and quietly smile and speak softly to the person and apologize-- it takes the wind out of their sails and makes them look like an idiot if they decide to continue to scream at you. So what I'm saying with your daughter is to just try to be as calm as can be and talk her through what you're doing. You'll still need to physically struggle to get her changed, but it will be overall a more pleasant experience for both of you if you stay ridiculously calm and explain each step of what you're doing. Also, when you buy her clothes, don't buy any more onsies or anything that snaps at the crotch.

I strongly disagree with the parents who suggest a "pop on the leg" that is just cruel. Babies don't contest anything for no reason at all. She is obviously at the very least uncomfortable. When my baby was brand new she hated being changed, so we started doing it in stages. I would take of her onesie and let her rest with just a diaper on for a while and she'd calm down, then I'd take off the dirty diaper and let her hang out nude for a a little while, just long enough to calm down, and then dress her again. I noticed one parents suggest baths. that worked for my baby as well because the warm water was a lot like a reset button. She'd forget she was upset and was so happy with the new sensation. But just being left nude for a few minutes was all it took. Now she doesn't care about being changed at all. I believe that hitting your child when she is trying to communicate discomfort, anxiety, or some other stress only stresses the child more and teaches them that their desire for comfort is worthless and only brings violence. Over time, I believe it is effective in teaching a child to stop the behavior, but it doesn't solve the problem, it merely shows them that their needs aren't worth being taken care of. Another thing I do is between changes, I'll always kiss her belly, blow raspberries, tickle her feet and arms. Anything to show that what I'm doing is for love not to torture her. Like I said, no problems at all and she's only a month old.

Hi Karine,
I have had a couple (out of 4 children) do that to me, and let me tell you that she's not too young to understand a pop on the leg. You may not be for spanking, and I don't know, but I'll just tell you what I have done that has helped. When my children would start to fight me, (and my 4th who is 15 months still does it really bad), I will get very serious with him and pop him softly on the leg, and tell him "Mommy is trying to change you and stop kicking". I don't pop him hard enough to hurt, but enough to get his attention, and he sees that I'm not playing and not going to put up with it, he does start to cry, but he gets very still and lets me finish. They have to learn that you are mommy and in control. This has helped a lot with 2 of my 4 children who are VERY strong willed and short tempered. When they don't get their way they will fight, but this has helped me tremendously, and my now 4 year old daughter who used to do the same thing, doesn't give any problems like that whatsoever when I ask her to do things, (of course she doesn't wear a diaper anymore, but for strong willed children, it just moves to other things later).
Pray about it and God will give you the guidance. Enjoy that baby!
Take care,
V.

Like Tammy mentioned... try to keep your tone (and your face) on an even keel. And buy more dresses!! (That's one of the bonuses of having a girl).
Good luck!

We had purchase a small 6 slot (fits drawers or shelves) shelving unit from Ikea. We use it for storage for burp cloths etc(similar to this but smaller http://www.ikea.com/us/en/catalog/products/S49850438 ), but the best part is my husband put large wall stickers (in the wallpaper section) on the bottom for our son to look at. We also bought a star show projecter (from Target http://www.mysimon.com/9015-11029_8-41490539.html ) that normally projects on the wall or ceiling, but we project it on the bottom of the shelving unit so the lights/shapes change as he is being changed. Our wiggly son still wiggles, but giggles more than cries.

Hope that helps

Karine,

Give her a favorite toy or her bottle or sippie cup to entertain her while you quickly dress her. Give her a set of keys or something that she usually doesn't get and only give it to her when she is being changed. That way it will be something special she can only have at that time. Or you can give her a teething toy, cracker or somethings else. Just give her something to take her mind off of what you are doing. Take Care,

T. (mom of 4)

PS. If that doesn't work, a good pop on the leg and a firm "No, No" may do the trick.
My 15 month old, our youngest of 4, wiggles a little bit now and then, but as soon as I give him something to keep him busy, He is a sweet compliant baby.

Hi Karine! My son is almost two and he STILL fights diaper changes. He is the same, as far as he has NEVER been happy with diaper changes. Unfortunately the only cure to this may be potty training. Hang in there!
M.

HI Karina J, This is the first I have heard of a baby protesting a diaper change. Here is what I would do. Talk to her Doctor and see what he/she says. If he/she can't figure out what is wrong, try to potty train her with pull-ups. Maybe this will help. M. J.

I've got 4 children and each had/have different responses to diaper changes. Some loved it and lay still for the most part. Mostly they wiggle and try to get away. It's better when I'm doing it on thier changing table because they can't crawl away. The only thing that helps for me is learning to do it faster. Get it done and get em out of there.
Good luck and hang in there!

Karine,

Now that the baby is getting older that will work to your favor in many ways. You can talk to her and tell her that you are hurrying and ask her to help you by going after her own diaper. This way she knows that you are getting ready to change her. Try telling her that by helping you will help you get finished sooner. You will have to modify the words to fit the child and tell her this everytime you change her until she understands what it is that you are saying to her. Don't expect it to work first time. Also, tell the child that you are going to change her and that you are going to do it now. This eliminates any confussion on the part of the child. Also agree with the child, that yes you know she does not enjoy this but that you will hurry. I would use short word phrases such as "I know, I know." and "I am hurrying." I don't know of anything that you are doing wrong. Some children are bothered more by this than others. Hang in there it will get better in time.

Maybe she has a hidden physical problem and it hurts to change clothes and diapes. Hernia? Talk to a doc.

My daughter just turned 2 and is STILL fighting diaper changes and clothing changes. So, it might not end any time soon for you. Sorry to have bad news. However, I have found that it is best to "roll with the resistence." Try and let them have choices in the matter, like "would you like to wear this or that?" Or "would you like for me to change your diaper on the bed or on the floor?" Also, get them to sing a song with you or play a game while doing it. It's just a normal way of them excerting their independence. good luck!

Sounds like you have your hands full! I wonder could she have a reaction to the sensation of materials touching her skin? I admit, I have only heard about this - but some children can have heightened senses towards certain fabrics etc. Does she pull at the clothes once they are on? Might check on line for some info.
Otherwise, maybe this is just the start of a strong-willed little girl bound to make life fun and sometimes challenging. I have a toddler and he can protest sometimes too. Just have to try to make it fast and not show your fear. :)