2 1/2 Yr Old Still Not Talking

Updated on June 05, 2008
D.B. asks from Grand Prairie, TX
35 answers

I have a 2 1/2 year old boy that can say a lot of words, but as yet to start using phrases, let alone, sentences. How common is this? People have told me to slow down my own speech so he'll catch on how to talk. I talk with him quite a bit everyday. I'm a stay-at-home mom and I play games with him and read him stories a lot. I ask him questions about stories we've read to encourage him to talk. But this hasn't seemed to do much. I ask him what snack he wants, but he usually just ends up pointing to the snack or fussing for it. Any advice? Perhaps, it is normal for many boys this age to still just be saying words here and there?

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So What Happened?

My son will be 3 next week. About 1 month ago his speech finally took off! He started repeating everything we said. And a couple weeks ago, he began saying entire phrases and sentences..sometimes he'd make the sentence or ask a question. he can't pronouce everything perfectly, but he does make the effort and make some kind of sound for each syllable. In a very short time, he has improved dramatically. We did have ECI services for 6 months. Thanks to everyone who recommended them. They had good ideas for encouraging talking.

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E.M.

answers from Dallas on

Every child should be able to put two words together by the time they are 24 months. If he cannot do that, call ECI now. Do NOT wait until he is 3 to get help. The school districts are much harder to deal with and are much less help.

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T.T.

answers from Dallas on

I suggest taking him to a Speach Therapist. We use Therapedia here in Southlake and love them.

My 19 month old could only say five words...now at 23 months can say 16 words and growing every week.

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A.V.

answers from Dallas on

D.,

It's so nice to talk to other moms in the same situation. My oldest son will be 3 on June 6th. I also have a 15 month old. My oldest has been in the ECI speech program since January. His therapist is great, but the program is really just a tool not a solution. How much can you expect from a 45 minute session every other week? But, I am thrilled we are in the program. I have slowed my speech down a lot, and his therapist gives me great suggestions. He is a REALLY active little boy. His interests are physical, not verbal. He has basic needs that I meet. So, there's not a ton of reason to talk. But, preschool has been great because he has to interact with peers who do talk. He started biting a few times and hitting because he couldn't talk as well as they did. So, I think getting in trouble for that and frustrated as well encouraged him to talk more. ECI stops services at 3 years old, but they help transition you into a program in your public school district. We are in the evaluation process for that now. And, I am confident he will get admitted into that program as well.

His ENT encouraged us to act now. He said that it's a lot harder socially for a child to get pulled out of class in elementary school for special education (i.e. speech therapy) than at his age right now when he has no idea that he is behind.

I don't view this delay as an indicator that he is not bright. I just think it is a hurdle that we need to get over. I think he will catch up and be just fine.

Feel free to email me if you want more information or just want to chat.

Sincerely,
A.

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E.B.

answers from Dallas on

I am a speech therapist who works with 3-5 year old preschoolers and it sounds like his expressive language skills are not age appropriate at this time. Children usually begin using single words at about 1 year two words at 2 years and three words at three year. So, if he is 2 1/2 going on three and still using one word then I would look into therapy options.

You can call your local ECI (Earlyhood Child Intervention) to see how long it would take to schedule an evaluation. They give free at home therapy services if your child qualifies. ECI services 0-3 year olds and your local school district services 3-5 year olds for free if they meet eligibility. You can call your local school district to see how soon they can get him evaluated. Some will evaluate just before the child turns three and other will make you wait. Some school districts schedule a month in advance so make sure you call before he turns three. You also have private speech therapy as an option, some insurances may cover the cost.

If he is saying lots of single words you should be able to get him to repeat after you. So, what you can start doing is have him repeat "carier phrases" after you. for example if he wants a cookie repeat after you "cookie please" or "I want" before you give it to him. He may fuss a little at first, but don't give in. He will soon learn that he has to use his words in order to get his needs and wants met. If he is getting what he wants by pointing or just using one word then there is not much motivation for him to start putting two words together.

You can also do this whith play. For example blow some bubbles a few times. They have him repeat "more bubbles" before you blow any more. He will quickly learn that he needs to start using more than one word to communicate.

Most kids like him usually do well once they have a little intervation. Hope this helps.

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C.W.

answers from Davenport on

I'm not sure how common it is. I have a 2 1/2 year old boy that is starting to say one full sentence or a at least 3 words together.

Try using a straw sippy cup. We get speech therapy for our foster child who is 2 years old. She instructed her to use sippy cups and we are using them with our own child. I have notice a big difference in his speech since then. You use different muscles when you use a straw and that is to help pronounce some of the sounds with those muscles.

You might check with ECI. Early Childhood Intervention, they are a service that you can use in your home to get your child evaluated by therapists. They can see if he is really behind or on target type of thing. They will do an evaluation of your child. HOwever, they only work with kids till they are 3 years old. If your child receives therapy and then he turns 3, they will have you move to the school system or to a private therapist.
We are currently using ECI with our foster child and they are great. She gets OT, behavior/developmental and Specch services. So, we have several therapists come out to meet with us and her to work on several different things.

You could also check with your Dr. Fort Worth ISD also has a program called Parents as Teachers. You might check into that also. They have meetings where you can discuss your child with other parents. This might help you get a sense for what other parents are dealing with or have dealt with and their children.

Boys are slower and develop at different rates than girls.

It might help you get an evaluation just so it is peace of mind for you.

If you need any more info, feel free to email me. Good Luck

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K.T.

answers from Dallas on

D.,

I too have had a boy with speech problems. For mine, he hasn't picked up on speaking at all. He is 21 months and only has a handful of words that he says. Some days are good and he'll say everything he knows and acts like he is working on new words and other days he just grunts the whole day. I talked with my doctor about it and she referred us to ECI (Early Childhood Intervention). It's a state run program and it's based on your annual income as to how much you have to pay (I believe if you make under $55K or something like that it's free). Anyways, they come out and evaluate him and then figure out where he needs help. For us they're bringing out a speech pathologist and they observe him and then tell me ways that I can help encourage him to use his words. They've also brought up that we might start sign launguage until he starts to pick up on words so that he has a way of communication.

It's hard I know. I've been so worried for the longest because his sister who is 5 now was always early on developing and he's always been typically behind (slow to crawl, walk, etc). It's hard not to compare and I'm constantly wondering if it's a learning disability. But I feel very confident with ECI that we're going to figure out what the problem is.

I'd just say talk to you doctor.

GOod luck

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A.G.

answers from Dallas on

As a special education teacher, I advice you to contact your school district. He may need speech and/or language therapy. Don't wait. The earlier the better!

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K.B.

answers from Milwaukee on

He may just be on his own schedule and will start talking when he's ready. However, I was concerned when my 2 year old daughter wasn't saying very many words yet and her pronounciation of the words she was saying wasn't very clear and I mentioned it to her pediatrician. He gave us a referral to the Early Childhood Intervention (ECI) speech therapist. It is a no cost program for children under 3 and they will come to your home and evaluate your child. I learned based on a goals list they had that she was doing okay and just needed a little more time. She's now 2 1/2 and while her pronounciation is still not the best, she has a fairly good sized vocab and I can understand about 75% of what she says. You don't have to have a referral, I believe you can also contact them on your own at 888-754-0524, if you want, but be aware that the benefit runs out at 3 years of age and then the local schools pick it up.

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A.K.

answers from Dallas on

My oldest son was also speech delayed. I would have him evaluated by ECI, but I wouldn't freak out about it. We had to start forcing the issue a bit more and asking him to "please use your words" alot. Sometimes, it's kind of a lazy thing or it's having a new baby. My son to this day does that sometimes. He is 4 and he will point and say drink. I quickly let him know that he is a big boy and that he needs to use his words and ask mommy politely in a sentence. He quickly gets the point and it ends the issue. ECI is great. My sister's son worked with them until he was 3 and now goes through the school district for speech therapy. I would give them a call and have him evaluated.

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D.G.

answers from Dallas on

Hey D.. Call ECI they are a government agency. They come to your home and do a free evaluation. If he meets the criteria, then they have all kinds of services, they have a speech therapist that will come to your home and help your son. Majority of the time it free, depends on you income but the income criteria is very high. I don't know anyone that has had to pay. Anyways, they are a wonderful resource. You can call them at 1-800-628-5115, thats the main number. I do daycare at my home and I have had children that ECI has helped with their speech.

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D.D.

answers from Dallas on

Dear D. B,

Please don't worry. It is not uncommon for boys to be slower to speak. My grandson was also very slow to start speaking. After only a few visits to a speech therapist, he began using sentences very quickly. If you haven't already done so, I would suggest asking your doctor for a referral. There may be some tests she will want to do first (hearing, etc.).

I have already said a prayer for you and your family, especially your oldest son. May God bless you all.

D. D

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K.B.

answers from Dallas on

I did not read all other responses so I hope I do not duplicate any responses. Have your doctor call the ECI and have him checked. They come to your house for free. So it is no trouble. My son had problems and i left it go since everyone said he is fine but then when he was 3 I went with my own feelings. The problem is that ECI will not accept them if they are smart in other areas. They have to have all sorts of trouble or really behind since it is a state funding. They told me my son was to smart which is not right to me but i guess there is a lot of otehr kids who are worse. Since my son did not qualify, again I listened to others and waited and then by the time he was 4 he was really behind and qualified for the public school speech funding for two 30 minutes a week. He is now 9 and is still in it. Some insurances pay for therapy so check that. Mine only pays for one a month at a qualifying doctor therapist which I utilize as well as the school system. If you can afford it do both so they are not in it so long. Starts to become problems with teasing around 3rd grade.

Go with your gut and it is just a phone call to get it set up. i just wish listened to myself and started him a lot earlier instead of listening to others.

One good note is my son has a very high IQ at 144 which is in the top 2% of the US, he is one grade ahead. So the doctor said sometimes kids with high iqs have a problem in another area, ours speech. Most are adhd but Im glad it is not that since his can be fixed.

K.

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M.R.

answers from Dallas on

All children are different and chances are your son is indeed perfectly normal... FOR HIM! The most important thing is not to compare him to other children except for generalizations - your children are each unique and will exhibit their own unique personalities in myriad ways.

First-born boys are the ones most likely to be slow to learn to talk. My oldest son was much the same as yours - he would point to what he wanted and then grunt and groan. I never spoke "baby talk" to him; I read to him and played with him every day. Yet even when encouraged strongly to use words he would point and grunt. This is the same child who refused to learn how to read and worried me greatly... until one day when he was 7-years-old, he grabbed the local newspaper, plopped himself down next to me on the sofa, and began reading the articles to me. :-)

Encourage him to repeat words after you. I did this with my son and even though he would repeat his own versions of the words back to me, he WAS talking. (For example: To him, "window" was "nanoo." I would have him repeat after me the syllables - "win" and then "dow" - and he would do it perfectly, but "window" remained "nanoo" for awhile! *grin*)

If you're concerned, talk to his pediatrician. This is, I assume, the doctor who has known him since he was born and can tell you whether he's just being himself or has some kind of problem.

As for slowing down your own speech, well... if you know that you speak too quickly, by all means slow it down a bit so that he can catch the words. On the other hand, if you feel that you already speak clearly and at a reasonable rate, DO NOT "dumb it down" for him. Never treat a child as if he is stupid or he will become stupid!

I hope this helps!

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K.C.

answers from Dallas on

when he points, tell him "to use his words" before getting him what he wants. i hear my daughter's toddler teacher at her preschool say that often to the kids that age and i use it at home.

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J.C.

answers from Dallas on

My son talked later too. He talks non-stop now. I would suggest when he wants a snack(or anything) saying "use your words". If he is getting what he wants by fussing, he has no need to talk.

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J.G.

answers from Amarillo on

I am sure he is perfectly normal. He knows he doesn't have to use his words to get what he wants. He points,you get it!! My son did the same thing. I would ask your Dr. to refer you to ECI(Early childhood intervention) They were wonderful with my son. They can send a speech therapist to work with him right in your own home. My son was talking within two months of them working with him. They also helped me use some sign language in combination with his words. He picked it up so easily. Before he could have something he would have to sign please. At the same time we would say please,very clearly,so he would see the connection. It was so interesting to watch him "get it" Anyway,don't worry he will start talking soon. If you are like me once he starts,you will wish for the days he only said a few words!!! Just kidding! Have a good day.
J.

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L.S.

answers from Dallas on

As long as he can point, grunt, and fuss to get what he wants, why would he put forth the effort to do anymore? You have taught him that he has no need to talk, because all he has to do is point and fuss. Trust me, if he is capable of talking then you should not give in to the pointing and fussing. Even if he gives you one word, then you give him the cookie, he will learn that he only gets the cookie by using language. He will then start using the language to communicate. My oldest did all those things you described. Your son has got you fooled!!!
I am assuming that he has no developmental delays, he sounds like a normal two year old from your description. So, I would tell you to be strong and to say perhaps "Mommy doesn't understand pointing and fussing anymore. You have to use your words if you want the cookie. When you are ready let me know." And walk out. Don't put up with the fussing either. Then you are reinforcing that all he has to do is fuss long enough and you will get it eventually to stop the fussing. Don't stand there all day waiting on him, begging him or tolerate the fussing. Tell him what he needs to do, give him a minute and then walk out telling him the phrase above.
I have some books that I read called "To Train Up a Child" and "No Greater Joy" written by Mike and Debi Pearle. They are really good and address things like talking issues from their point of view, discipline etc. Highly recommend and have used as a basis for our 3 sons. I don't advocate everything they suggest but do find their line of reasoning very functional.
Good luck,
L.

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B.A.

answers from Dallas on

D.,

this is normal for some children.......i have two grandchildren that have done the same thing..........
Around age three - three and a half they started talking in phrases ...then sentences.
It's no reflecton on you as to what you do or do not do for them.
Don't be too concerned ..they will talk when they are ready.
Just be patient and love them alot!!!!!

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R.S.

answers from Tyler on

My son was very similar in his slow speech. I thought he would never say his own name! He is now 12 years old and has perfectly normal speech (except all the slang he likes to drive me crazy with!:) His pediatrition had asked me to take him to a speech therapist at about age 2 1/2. In my heart I just knew he was ok. So...we didn't go. For him, everything just happened a little after the average but he is very bright and perfectly normal in all development now.

On another note, 2 of my girls seemed to talk very early and I credit part of that to learning sign language with them. My MIL just knew that if I taught them sign language they would never have a need to talk! PANIC! We watched Baby Signing Time and their speech and vocabulary exploded. They learned to say the word they were signing. It is so much fun and you can take a look at: www.signingtime.com .

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C.F.

answers from Dallas on

This is common my little boy is about 2 1/2 years old and I have him in Early Child Intervention. They come to the home or to the day care and work with your child. Mine would only mmmmm the sounds of the words. Instead of open his mouth up. Now he can say about 16 words. If you need more info email at ____@____.com

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J.M.

answers from Dallas on

I think one day as you keeping talking to him he will just start picking up words I would worry at this time just keep talking to him Jay from Texas

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P.M.

answers from Dallas on

I think it is very common for boys to be later talkers. My son, now a little over 3 years old, didn't start even trying to say more than one word at a time until he was 2 1/2. Even then what he said was "No help" and I was stunned when he said even that. It just slowly build from that without me doing much of anything except talking like I always did and asking him questions. Now that he's 3 he talks ALL THE TIME -now it's nice when I actually get some peace and quiet. :-)

It'll happen when your son is ready and it will probably be some time between now and when he turns 3.

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C.S.

answers from Dallas on

D.,
I have heard that boys tend to talk later than girls. I would suggest though, if you are worried have him evaluated by Early Childhood Intervention (ECI) and they will tell you if he is delayed or just fine and what to do to help! Just a thought!
Blessings,
C.; mom to two by birth and five current foster children... all from God!

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J.P.

answers from Dallas on

I have heard the boys take longer to talk than girls and that is definitely the case with my kids. The only difference is that my son did have problems with cronic ear infections, so once he had tubes put in (at about 2 1/2) his talking improved almost immediately. Before that only I could really understand him and that was because we were together so much. He is now almost 6 and trust me the last thing I am worried about is his ability to talk.

His sister on the other hand just turned 2 last month and you can carry on full conversations with her. She has a few words that are still hard to understand but other than that it is amazing the difference between the 2.

I would just ask the doctor. If he/she says he is on track than I wouldn't worry too much. It seems like you are doing everything right, just keep talking to him and trying to get him to use words instead of pointing but if he knows the words but just isn't putting them together in sentences he might just need more time.

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B.S.

answers from Dallas on

I am having the same problem with my daughter. Your description sounds exactly like what I tell people! For the last year I have questions my pediatricians (I have had 2 since we moved). At my infants last appointment I brought it up again and was told at 2 1/2 he and anyone else should be able to understand 1/4 of all the words they say. He could not so he did think having her language and hearing tested would be a good idea. While I know my daughter can hear I have read that there can some hearing problems still. then again the dr warned we may be told there is nothing wrong she is just slow in talking. We have decided to have the dr refer us to a speech pathologist to make sure we know why she doesn't talk. At least if she has difficulties we can help her and move forward and if they say there is nothing wrong then that is great too. i felt I would hate to think it is normal only to find out we could have helped her. So talk to your and get his advice. If you are worried then take charge and do what you are comfortable with.

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A.S.

answers from Dallas on

I also recommend ECI. They have a sliding scale for payment. They will come to your home for the evaluation and all appointments if your son needs it. The numbers are 1-888-754-1524 or ###-###-####. If he needs help he can get it through them until the age of three, then he would have to go through the school system. They will also give you suggestions on how to help him with his speech.

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A.L.

answers from Dallas on

It may be time to have him evaluated by a speech pathologist. Talk to your pediatrician about that. However, I used to teach preschool, 2-year-olds in fact, and had one little boy I'll call Lewis. Lewis didn't talk at all -- not at home, not at school. He was approaching 2 1/2, and I was about to recommend evaluation to his parents when he started talking...in complete sentences! I mean sentences of 7-8 words at a time, all stuck together. Just because it's worth having a professional take a look at him now doesn't necessarily mean something is wrong!

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C.T.

answers from Dallas on

This is really common. I would recommend you call your pediatrician and ask about your local Early Childhood Intervention office which sees children with delays in all areas of development. I worked for an ECI program for 8 years and can honestly say that my caseload was 95% 2 year old boys who were speech delayed. They will do an evaluation with you present in your home and the cost of services are very little compared to a private therapy setting. All of their services are in your home. They really look at your routines during your day and give you suggestions on how to focus on language during those routines. The earlier the better!!

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T.T.

answers from Dallas on

My first piece of advice is to follow your instincts. It's really easy to make excuses, but if you feel that something is not right, then take the next step. Even my pediatrician made excuses for my older son's delays, so I waited until my son was older (almost 4 )before getting help. I really wish I had followed my instincts earlier. He's doing OK now (at 6), but I also think another year of help would had made a difference.

Like some of the other ladies said, ECI is a great place to start!! It's easy and free. If you get your evaluation and he's on target then you get peace of mind. If they find a delay, then you are well on your way to getting him back on track.

I know it's confusing and scary to think your son has a delay, but don't worry, getting early intervention is the best thing you can do!! Both my sons have been (are going) through it!!

Good luck!!

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L.C.

answers from Dallas on

D.,
PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE don't listen to anyone else. You are the mommy and of your little red flags are going up then do something about it. Call ECI (Early Childhood Intervention) and they will come do an eval on him. I believe they use the sliding scale for paying them. I am not sure on that one. We used them years ago and it was free! Anyway....Or you can go to a develpmental pediatrician, Lisa Genecov in Dallas in one. Don't talk to your regular pediatrician!!!!!Or see a private speech patholigist. Call the Callier center or google them. Early help for him WILL ONLY benefit and could be the best move you have EVER made for him! Thank God I did not listen to everyone else. I got help quickly and it helped SO MUCH!
If you need more info email me anytime.
L.
You are a great mom by asking for help!
L.

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C.M.

answers from Dallas on

I have heard that boys do just fuss and whine and do not speak until 3+ but my daughter is 2 1/2 and I understand all she says, (if I do not understand she signs it) Maybe you should try signing as another form of language. I also am a stay at home mom and have her in daycare two days aweek for her social learning. I think because she talks to 2 and 3 year olds she developed more quickly. I think if, I AS A MOTHER WAS CONCERNED AT ALL ABOUT MY CHILDS DEVELOPEMENT I WOULD TALK TO MY PEDITRICIAN FIRST AND FOREMOST BEFORE LISTENING TO OTHERS MOMS. EVERY CHILD IS DIFFERENT AND THEY CAN TELL YOU IF, HOW YOUR CHILD IS DEVELOPING IS OKAY!!! Hope you get the answers you are looking for C. from Texas

T.S.

answers from Dallas on

I have the same problem with my son who is also 2 1/2. We first took him to have his ears checked ( Family Audiology ###-###-####. His ear were fine. Then I called ECI to get him evaluated on speech and development. Now I should say that I was an educator for 17yrs. I know who to call for help. So, here's ECI number they can better help you on what steps to take. If anything they can help with suggestions and how to help with your child's speech.
I would also suggest you speak with your child's doctor give him all the facts that way you can better assess the situation

Our son did have some speech and development problems, but in this short time he has made such a huge progress.
Here's ECI number ###-###-####. We also use Baby Einstein videos and leap frog videos. I would be happy to talk with you more if like.
Continue what you are doing what you are doing D., and contact your pediatrician for help.
I hope this helps and good luck
T.

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L.H.

answers from Dallas on

I see alot have told you to have him tested, and i would definitely do that, but I want to recommend that you also make sure that he doesn't have a lot of earwax buildup. Sounds crazy I know but my son had speech delays that suddenly and quickly dissapeared after a bout with ear infections he had in both ears. At that appt they used a water pick to clean out his ears because the wax was so bad that the doctor couldn't see his ear drums. So make sure there aren't any hearing issues as that can be a cause for delays in speech.

Many Blessings!!

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M.G.

answers from Dallas on

I don't want to alarm you but you should have him checked out by a developmental pediatrician. They should be able put your worries to rest. My son who is 4 was just diagnosed with PDD-NOS which is on the autism spectrum. The only indication to me was he didn't talk as much as his peers. I can only wish I would have caught it earlier. Good luck.

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T.A.

answers from Dallas on

D.,
My son is now 3 and began with ECI when he was 2 1/2 for speech. It was very comfortable for him as they came to our house. It was free for us as well. He had an excellent therapist and he looked forward to her visits. Since ECI is until they are 3, they got us connected to the school and when he turned 3 began speech classes through the public school. ECI is an excellent program and I would recommend calling them first.

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