5 Year Old Still Wets His Bed

Updated on June 03, 2008
M.V. asks from Mocksville, NC
28 answers

Hello Moms,

My 5 year old son still wets his bed!! My sister told me its because we put a diaper on him so about 1 month ago we stopped the diaper!! Now I have to wash sheets and PJ's every day!! We even put the alarm on at 1am and 4 am to get him to go potty and most of the time we are too late!!! We are frustrated and tired of getting up during the night!! If anyone has a suggestion, we will try anything at this time!! We dont let him drink anything after 7pm and make sure he goes potty before he goes to bed!! But that doesn't help either!! Please help us because I am ready to get him back in diapers!!!

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So What Happened?

Hello Everyone!
Thank you sooo much for all your advices and suggestions! I dont and never have punished him for wetting the bed, but I admit i've been frustrated especially since he fights me tooth and nail about taking a shower in the mornings after he has been wet!! We had been using the good-nights for over a year now! Anyway, I simply asked him what he would prefer and he opted for the "diaper" (good nights), he doesn't even mind that we call them diapers! He is working with us on not drinking so much in the evenings and I talked to his pediatrician and she confirmed that there is nothing to worry about until he is at least 7 or even 8!! And .... both his parents were bed wetters.. so I guess he gets it honestly!! Thanks to all, youguys have put my mind at ease and we'll just be patient!

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N.N.

answers from Norfolk on

Hi M.

I think this totally normal and you are doing everything you can by limiting the drinks after 7 P.M. I know a couple little boys with the issue. I would just go back to the big boy pull ups for a while. My nephew is 8 and he still has to wear them.

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A.B.

answers from Charlotte on

My 5 year old sleeps in the good nights, because almost nothing will wake her in the middle of the night. She does realize that her friends and cousins don't still sleep in pull ups and that she can't have sleep overs until she stops, but we got sick of the sheet washing also. Good luck, let me know if you find anything that works.

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A.T.

answers from Jacksonville on

I have heard that it is because his bladder has not caught up with the rest of his body. Talk to his pediatrician about it. Also try good nights. They look like underwear and protect like a diaper.

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C.B.

answers from Norfolk on

Hello M.,
I know how you feel!! My son was still having accidents till the age of 5 1/2. His pediatrician said not to worry unless this goes beyond his 6th b-day. We put him in Good Nights (Pull-ups) until he finally stopped. All children are different, my oldest and youngest were out of diapers and pull-up by the age of 3. Also, we never made it a big deal bout wearing pull-ups due to the psychological trama it may cause. We called them his special underpants. Making a big deal about it will worsen the situation. When he is ready to go through the night without peeing he will. Just make sure you keep his doctor in the loop of what's going on. Trust me, he will stop (Boys are usually slower than girls...I guess we woman call it laziness!! LOL) Good Luck :-)

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C.B.

answers from Norfolk on

Some children wet the bed until they are 9-10 years old. Waking him up in the middle of the night is just making your life crazy and his. You dont want to mess up his sleep schedule to much so I wouldnt be waking him up at night. I personally would go to the Dr. and see if their is a medical reason for him still wetting the bed at night. You never know he may have a problem with his bladder (small).

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D.T.

answers from Roanoke on

My oldest is 8 and still has accidents occasionaly. I cut him off of fluids an hour before bedtime. I believe it is due to him being such a sound sleeper that he just doesn't wake up in time to go, but once he feels a little of the wetness he will get up, go to the bathroom and change is underware himself.

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K.S.

answers from Norfolk on

Check with your family Doctor. this can be an herditary condition where a child's bladder doesn't grow as fast as the rest of him. Its more common in boys. My brother (and father too) had this growing up and wet the bed almost until he was 10 at night. There is actually medicine that is availble to help with this. Also they have big kids diapers called "goodnites" that are made especially for this type of thing. The good news is kids grow out of this after a while. But talking to your dr can help with problems right now!

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J.J.

answers from Norfolk on

M.,
I feel your pain. My son who is now 13 (will be 14 next month), wet the bed for years and will still occasionally wet the bed. It doens't have anything to do with the fact you put a diaper on him, the reason children wet the bed is because they actually have a nerve that needs to develop in order for them to stop doing this. Chances are, you or your husband were bed wetters. It is heriditary. Once that nerve fully develops he will stop, it will get less and less with age. I know it is frutstrating to wash sheets all the time. He is five so instead of a diaper you could use maybe a Goodnight on him. That is what my neighbor uses for her daughter. Believe me, I have been to the pediatrician on this one, if you were not a bedwetter asked your hubby.. in our case, it was my husband that wet the bed, back then they actually had a surgery to help,(which he had) but that was before they really knew the cause. . Just be patient, he will grow out of it. J.

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D.H.

answers from Norfolk on

My 5yo still wears pull-ups at nite. Sometimes he wakes up dry sometimes he doesnt. My oldest son wore a pull-up to bed until he was 6.5yo. It just depends on their bladder. I say do the pull-ups(we call them special nite time underwear)until he starts staying dry. Everyone will sleep better and your son wont wake up upset. Good luck!

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A.F.

answers from Columbia on

I have an almost seven year old daughter who still wears Goodnites. We limit her drinking and make sure she goes potty right before bed but, most mornings when she wakes up she is wet. Her doctor said there wasn't a problem and that some kids just don't wake up when they need to go to the bathroom. Eventually, it will stop. Have you checked out the Goodnites website? They have newsletters, articles and message boards that might be helpful.

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C.R.

answers from Charlotte on

M.,

This was my son. Out of desperation we finally took him to a Peditric Urologist who gave me th easy answer. No milk after 3:00 PM. Apparently there is a chemical in the milk that promotes great sleep but also relaxes some muscle so that my son wet almost every night.

We did not restrict fluids after 3:00 PM, just stopped the milk (he got to drink plain water. This worked.

If this doesn't work, this is a pill called Impramine that will also do the trick (it is tiny). You will need a prescription for it. Some boys just take longer and it is normal.

Good luck!

C.

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L.M.

answers from Norfolk on

If not putting a diaper on him at night doesn't work, then it seems that he just needs to grow out of it. My brother in law said he wet the bed until age 7, and now my nephew who is 6 still wets every once in a while. I have heard that it is hereditary. If he still wets the bed every night, I would put the diaper back on. It's too much to wash sheets and pjs every day, plus not getting any sleep! When you notice him not going in the diaper or pull-up every night, then I would go back to using underwear and monitoring him during the night. Some kids just aren't ready yet! Good Luck!!!

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U.M.

answers from Fayetteville on

There may be several issues at the root of this and checking with the pediatrician would be a good idea.

My son had this problem until well into school age. We did the limiting fluids in the evening, waking him up to go to the bathroom in the night, etc. The pediatrician's only sugggestions were some medication, which I wanted to leave as a last resort, and those alarms that wake him up after he wet his bed, which did not make sense to me as he woke up after he wet his bed anyways, don't see how it is supposed to prevent it from happening.
When I took him to a chiropractor for treatment it improved noticeably after the first few treatments, and disappeared within weeks completely. So that worked for him and I was glad as this was pretty non-invasive and had no side effects like medication would have had.

It might be worth a try. Good luck.

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S.V.

answers from Greenville on

dont punish him!!! i wet the bed and i was a lot older than he was, my parents yelled at me punished me, you name it and this just made it harder for me..i knew that i was trying to hard not to wet the bed and nothign i tried worked, it got to the point i would get up early and wash my own sheets without them knowing...it could be a number of problems, i know now i have a lot of bladder problem (not that i cant control it, but i get extreme pains when i need to go, in otherwords when i need to go you better get me there or im in pain!) it could be that hes feeling stressed, you said you moved, even a change in the enviroment could cause this...just remind him at night to use the potty and try the pull ups if you cant deal with the laundry and what not, its not his fault hes trying..just hang in there!

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C.C.

answers from Greensboro on

Hi, I feel your pain or should I say your laundry...lol My 8 yr old son still wets too almost every night. My doctor says that it's more common than you think especially for boys that they still wet at night even though during the day it's not an issue. Their body is not ready yet or they sleep too soundly or whatever. My doctor just "prescribed" an alarm system that you sew into his undies and when it senses moisture it goes off. I was going to get this but it's about $200.00. he's in pullups (he's a peanut and they still fit. the biggest size and soon they wil be too small) But why change the sheets every day just wait till he's ready. My son has mentioned that he doesn't want to wear them anymore and on his own has decided to start trying to stay dry. I told him that it's fine but I showed him how to change his sheets and wash the plastic protector that covers his mattress. It's a real pain because its a double size futon. He has had to do it 3 times now and he hates to do it. But I will not do it for him because the doctor says that it could be a physiological thing too and if he doesn't want to have to change the sheets he'll stop wetting. He's been dry for 3 nights now so we'll see. I wish you luck I was where you are and it's a long road. But I found that once I accepted it and realized that it would come when his body was ready it took a lot of stress off of me. ASnd we didn't talk about it anymore. COngratulate him when he stays dry but don't talk about it when he doesn't.

C.

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I.G.

answers from Roanoke on

It is okay for your son to wear a pull-up to bed this is why they make them for. I peed the bed until I was 8 or 9yrs old and my parents whiped me and my sisters made fun of me. This is not the right way to handle this. Your son's blatter may not be growing as fast as the rest of his body. So buy him some pull-ups and be kind to him let him know that it doesn't matter that accidents happen. This is what I did with my 5 yr old little girl and this helped her alot knowing that it was okay. It has been about 6 months and she only has an accident every once in awhile. She is very proud of herself and no longer wears the pull-ups. Good luck.

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T.D.

answers from Norfolk on

Hi M.,

I had one son still wet off and on till 4 and my middle guy gosh till 9. It resulted from not getting REM sleep. I had taken him to a urologist to make sure there was nothing physical wrong and we actually had to retrain him for his day wetting which was teaching him to relax his sphinctor muscle so he would release everything from the bladder. It took a couple weeks and it helped tremendously.

Thank God for Good nights because I taught him how to descretly put them on so he could enjoy a sleep over and the mom and I would know but the other children did not. This really helped him not be ashamed. I feel so bad for people that have been punished for something they cannot control.

It's just something you have to live with until he outgrows it. Just use the good nights or the small depends depending on his size. Stop worrying... And stop washing sheets.

Just an added note....Of course he's going to fight a bath...He is 5...wait till he's 9 and does that or you have to stand over hime to make sure he wipes his bottom...brush his teeth...Oh and how about flushing the toilet...LOL

You bread a male species....LOL and he sounds ALL Boy...

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E.C.

answers from Norfolk on

In males especially, some wet the bed for YEARS. In my family, most of the men wet the bed until 18 years of age. They had to go to a special doctor and eventually stopped, but that was in their teens. It's some sort of condition where they don't wake up even when their bladder is knocking on the door. They sleep through it until they wake up in the morning soaked. My mom went through years of cleaning sheets and frustration, but I would take him to the doctor. That may be your only hope at this point. Good luck to you!
E.

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D.B.

answers from Charlotte on

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A.D.

answers from Charlotte on

I noticed you moved recently, has your son had any other symptoms of being unhappy? Did the bedwetting start after moving? You might want to consult your Pediatrician about this. We have five children, one is still in diapers but our 7 yr old wets occasionally. He is such a deep sleeper, confused, disorientated when we wake him to use the bathroom. My husbands Mom says that runs in her family. We don't let him drink after 6pm. We take him to the rest room around 11pm before we go to bed, and if his day has been emotional or he is very tired one of us gets up around 3 to take him again. Emotions take so much out of you, that's why I asked if this happened since the move. I would ask your Dr but I wouldn't put him back in a diaper that will confuse him even more or cause more emotional trauma. I do wish you the best, it is frustrating, but hang in there and all will work out!

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J.H.

answers from Greenville on

his problem stems from sleeping too hard. its called enuresis. check with your dr he can help. some children dont grow out of it tillage 12 or better. sorry.

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J.R.

answers from Norfolk on

Hi, I have been a babysitter for years and years. Sometimes the kids spend a night and I run into this problem every now and again. I put a limit on how much the child drinks and how late into the evening I allow them to drink. Also try to make a game out of this problem with some rewards. A pullup is much better than a diaper, refer to them as big boy/girl undies and the child might get the idea that he/she is getting to be a big boy/girl.

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R.H.

answers from Jacksonville on

Have u taken him to the DR.'s yet? He may just have a weak bladder. I ask u this because I was a bed wetter till I was about 6-7 and I am 33 now, but the frustration by adults and the trouble I got in...the constant telling me not to wet my bed, or to stop being lazy, or even me trying to hide the fact that I did wet the bed and got in trouble for "lying"...is still in my memory today. It really isnt the childs fault...MAKE SURE U TAKE HIM TO THE DR. The last thing u want is for your son to feel like hes doing something wrong. GOOD LUCK!

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S.W.

answers from Norfolk on

You might think about taking him to a uroligist.
S.

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E.D.

answers from Asheville on

My son turned 6 in December, and finally stopped wetting his bed. We stopped the pull-ups at age 4 because he said they were too itchy and uncomfortable. He wouldn't wet the bed every night, just a couple times a week. Which is more than enough when you have to get up and change sheets in the middle of the night! We still limit his drinks, nothing after supper, a little sip of water before bed. I guess he just grew out of it. One thing with my son, he gets constipated a lot. Our doctor said that wetting the bed and constipation are connected. He definitely wets the bed when he is constipated. Something to consider. Be patient, and do what works for your family. If he wants a pull-up, let him have it.

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S.A.

answers from Jacksonville on

Hello! I wouldn't punish him. Maybe he is having trouble because of your recent move. He might need a little longer to adjust to his new way of life or it could be a medical problem. I'd suggest giving him a few more months and if nothing changes, then talk with your pediatrician. Have you tried the Good Nites? They are pull-ups for older children and they work very well. My daughter is four, but still wets every now and then. We also use them on my step-son. He's seven, but he's autistic, so we're still working with him to master potty training and have had great success with Good Nites.

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C.

answers from Charlotte on

Hey M.,

This is definately a medical issue and might be better addressed by a pediatrician. Check out this website:
http://www.pedsurology.com/bed.htm

It states that "Most school-age children who wet their beds have primary enuresis. This means they have never developed nighttime bladder control. Instead, they have had this condition since birth and often have a family history of the problem. Children who are older when they develop nighttime bladder control often have at least one parent who had the same problem. In most cases, these children become dry at about the same age that their parent(s) did."
This website has quite a bit of good info on bedwetting. Hope this helps!

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S.H.

answers from Roanoke on

PLEASE Don't keep putting diapers on him. I had the same problem with my oldest when he was little. We found out that he had a smaller bladder than most kids and the fact that he sleeps like a rock didn't help. We had to do the alarm and getting up and taking him to the potty, but for me this was a problem until he was 12. When he was sleeping, he slept sooo sound that by the time his brain registered what his body was telling him, it was too late.. but after about a yr of doing the alarm and consist work together, he was fine. When you put diapers on a child at night, that is potty trained in the day, it can cause confusion in their little head. It will take ALOT of patience. Reward him when he does good with it. But don't punish him when he wets the bed. That never helps any situation.. Good Luck S.

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