8 Year Old Boy Trouble Sleeping

hello
I think it's an age thing. my child who is also 8 needs me to lay down with him until ,he, too falls asleep. I really don't mind doing it in that children do get anxious about things that might seem little to us but in fact cause big anxiety for them. My son gets anxious especially when the wind is blowing and it causes many things to creak around the house. I NEVER take away privileges for my having to put him to bed, I don't think that is right in that, children have fears and by punishing because they are anxious or afraid, to me, sends the message that it's not ok to have those feelings. But hey, that's me. Again, what accounts for small change for us, e,g, vacations, school might amount to BIG changes for him which clearly it does. I would instead of taking away privileges get him to talk more about what might be causing the anxiety. See if there are other things you can do to help him ease his tension, one thing might be to learn breathing exercises. We do this with our child , when he begins to feel anxious, I help to calm him and get him to try and recognize his breathing, I teach him to take long slow breaths instead of fast ones.. this has actually helped him ease his anxiety. we use a scale of 1 to 5 and tells me at each point of the anxiousness he is feeling where it is on the scale.
I hope your son begins to feel better soon.
best of luck

My kids have always had the same issues. Sometimes it takes a few weeks to get back into sleep cycles. It seems the longer something is going on, the longer it takes so getting back to school is a big struggle. One thing I have never done though is punish unless they refuse to at least settle down. They read, draw, or quietly talk (they are in the same bedroom) for a little while. Sometimes eating a banana helps my son sleep. For one of my girls, a little warm milk helps a bit. They are not allowed to play any videos or watch TV, or do puzzled because that gets your brain working. Also, it is possible his exercise in the evening is revving him up so he cannot really relax. I cannot exercise more than a casual walk later than 8 pm or I cannot sleep, no matter how tired I am.

My oldest son struggles with anxiety with changes in routine and schedules. I have found he usually just needs a little more of my attention throughout the day and looking for me to acknowledge changes are hard for him. Since the trouble is effecting bedtime, you could try reading books together, puzzles or games just before bed to help him relax and feel connected to you. My son usually needs a lot of assurance there is nothing wrong with him and we love him unconditionally during these times. It takes patience because you have to wait for them to process feelings they don't understand. The pressure of having things taken away may leave him feeling defeated if he doesn't know why he is feeling so insecure. I have learned this the hard way with my son. He is a perfectionist and if we add any pressure for performance or expectations it can be his undoing. It takes a lot of patience, but your family will find a way to work through it. Good luck.

We are going through this right now. My 10 year old started having trouble last October after going to a friend's house and watching a scary movie with clowns. Since then, there have been other "images" that seem to cause him to not be able to fall asleep. We have a fish tank in the room (for light), he sleeps with his 11 year old brother, we have a security system, white noise, prayer, positive imaging (ie; a happy place), watching funny cartoons,etc. We tried everything. He'd get himself so worked up! After a couple teary nights, I asked him what he thought would help and he said he wanted to go to a doctor to find out what was wrong with him. I assured him there was nothing "wrong" with him, but he was so upset, that I told him I'd check into it the next day. My 10 year old is NOT the drama queen that my other kids may tend to be. When he said he wanted to die cuz he was so frusterated, you bet your butt we took steps to get it figured out. He slept on our bedroom floor until we got him in to a counselor. I thought maybe there was some "magic trick" that I hadn't thought of. Not really. The counselor told us we'd already done pretty much everything she'd suggest. Then she told us we may want to look into anti-anxiety meds to help him before bed. My SIL also took her son to a counselor for the same problem and when I asked her what finally helped, she said she'd give her son Benadryl an hour before bed to help relax him. That really wasn't the route I wanted to take, but at some point, you get desperate, ya know? She suggested a "Fear Box" -we write down our fears and put them in the box. We then take the box out of the house. Also, she had my son draw a picture of the scary image. He then drew a picture of the exact opposite. So, he drew the "scary clown", then drew a very "happy clown". We did this in the daylight so that we were able to talk about it well before bed to try to alleviate the nighttime stigma. We also got him some books that he really likes to read/look at. He does this right before bed while I'm getting into my pj's to head into the room. Last but not leat, I told him that I'd buy him a new Lego set if he made it 3 weeks without coming into our bedroom. So far, so good and it's been 4 nights.
I realize that kids can have active imaginations and some can get more "animated" images-so much so, that it's hard to get the vividness out of their brains. Many nights, as I lay in bed, my mind will start racing...thinking about so many TO DO items, that I can't get to sleep. It's much like that, only scary TO DO lists!!! LOL! Try to be patient with him. I'm sure he's not exactly happy about being scared or full of anxiety. Maybe some of our counselor's suggestions will help. Hopefully, it's phase and soon he will be falling asleep on his own. It could be that the adrenaline from football is hard to come down from. Maybe a bath instead of shower, if that's what he's doing. Tell him it's good to soak his muscles after football!! :) *Oh yeah, my daughter has this issue, too, only not as intense or often. What usually works with her is to have her tighten all her muscles.....eyeballs, down to her toes. Hold it for a couple seconds, then slowly relax each muscle one by one. My mom did this with me when I was a little girl and I use it today. It gives the mind something to think about while tiring out the body. I wish you luck!!! ( and sleep :)

Why in the world would you punish a child for not being able to sleep? Do you think he is enjoying it? You are his parents! You should be doing whatever you can to help him, not punishing him because it's an inconvenience for you.

Playing football in the evening may be contributing to this. But obviously if he is able to sleep with one of you in the room with him, there is something else going on. You really need to talk to him with kindness and patience and try to get to the bottom of this.

my 8 year old boys had and still occasionally have sleep time issues, what we do once lights are out the boys have 30 mins to try to fall asleep, no getting out of bed or it restarts, then we go up and check if anyone is awake, if awake they read for 15 mins with a reading light(a book they have read and not to interested in) then lights out again, go check 30mins later. very rarely is anyone awake after that. one of the boys falls asleep fast then wakes up 20 to 30 mins later, we also allow reading when that happens. we do not have a clock in their room because they stare at it waiting for us to come back, having a set time reassures them and lets them be more relaxed. also, we do a little breathing relaxation on high energy nights, after story with lights off then 30 mins begins when done. good luck!

Exercising close to bedtime will definitely keep a person up. Maybe allow him to stay up, reading in bed, until he feels sleepy enough to fall asleep on his own. I don't think staying in his room is really going to help him. If he stays up later than normal and is made to wake up at the same time for a few days, he'll be naturally more sleepy at his regular bed time.