ADD- Need Some Advice

Updated on February 24, 2008
A.H. asks from Dallas, OR
17 answers

I just had school confrences and my son's teacher said that he possibly had ADD. I have read up on it and I do believe that ADD would anwser a whole lot of fustrations. He is smart, smart, smart but his behavior and actions with out thinking it out are to much. I grew up with a brother that was on Ritalin(back then they gave it to every child) and a mother that was addicted to precrition drugs. I dont want to drug him. Are there any other options that I can try first?

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C.R.

answers from Seattle on

All I can say... is that if my mom wouldnt have been put on anything... I know for a fact I wouldnt have graduated. or succeeded in life. I have grown out of my adhd after time... I ABSOULTLY THANK MY MOM FOR DRUGGING ME! i understand why you dont want to. but it safed me!

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A.H.

answers from Seattle on

Hello,
I am not speaking from personal experience. But before you put him on drugs, it could be that he is so smart he gets board. And it seems like he is acting out. With some of these ADD things, I think they might be a little to quick to diagnose. There also might be someways you can teach him to occupy himself instead of acting out. I hope it all works out for you.
A.

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J.H.

answers from Spokane on

Hi A.! Are you still with Momasource??? What happened to your son in the above request? I'd like to know....I have a friend who is very well versed in ADD, and if you need her help, I'd love to get you in contact with her.
:>) J.

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M.P.

answers from Portland on

First, you need to get a professional diagnosis. I think that you can do that thru the County Educational Service District. Federal law requires that all children with disabilities be screened and then helped by the school district. But if you prefer you can get an assessment by a psychologist, psychiatrist or someone in a related field that specializes in ADD disorders. Your pediatrician should be able to give you a referral.

Yes, there are now a lot of different ways to treat ADD that does not involve drugs. There are also different drugs now. You should be able to access that information thru the Internet.

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J.M.

answers from Portland on

I am a wife who's DH has ADHD and possibly my son but too soon to tell and a dad and 4 brothers with ADD/ADHD. My dad is on medication as he finds it easier to concentrate and acomplish things at work. My hubby is not and struggles with it, although we have found vitamins to help especially the B vitamins. The school is required to pay for testing (most insurences dont cover because its the schools responsibility) and if he is diagnosed its considered a learning disability. A positive diagnosis could go a long way in helping him in school because the schools are required by law to help him. You sit down with a counseler and usually the principle and come up with an Individual Education Plan (IEP). It takes some checking up on them though as its extra work they often dont want to do. I have heard alot of drug alternatives out there but I will tell you this, my brothers didnt get medication and now in early adulthood they are struggling in there professional and personal lives. The 3 that are 18 didnt graduate and havent gotten GED's yet despite my mom trying to encourage them. They are very smart but lack some couping skills and the ability to deal with details. First get an offical diagnosis and work from there is my advice. Good luck, Jen

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R.L.

answers from Eugene on

My Husband has ADD and had ADHD as a child (35 yrs ago when it wasn't as popular). He was on Ritalin for a few years and then his parents got divorced and his dad got custody, took him to the Dr. while on meds and the Dr. said he didn't need them (ugh). So, he was taken off of them and has has survived since, but going thru school was horrible for him. Having just had a little boy, I wanted to read up in case Riley ends up with it as well. I would SO recommend anything by Thom Hartmann...

Attention Deficit Disorder : A Different Perception by Thom Hartmann, Edward M. Hallowell and Thom Hartmann's Complete Guide to ADHD: Help for Your Family at Home, School and Work by Thom Hartmann, Lucy Jo Palladino, and Peter Jaksa

are good ones to start with. I really like the way he looks at is - not as some horrible disorder - but as a different way of seeing the world and dealing with it. The trick seems to be that you have to figure out how to help your child deal with the rest of the world that thinks differently. There are also thoughts about diet/exercise/sleep that might help with some different issues kiddos can have.

Good luck! :)

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D.R.

answers from Seattle on

OH my gosh! There is so much you can do. I have had a few friends kids and a nephew that has been "diagnosed" as having add/adhd. One of my friends did a lot of research and simply changed her sons diet. There are a lot of foods that contribute to the "hyper" activity. Also, she Detoxified her home. and put him on some great kids vitamins that we buy at a more natural store. Do some research.. There has been a lot of controversy about chemicals in the home cuasing Chemical reactions in the brain and body. There are also alot of nuerotoxins that affect the brain. Chemicals that are in our every day products contribute to nuerotoxics, soaps, shampoos, laundrey detergent, simple household cleaners.

I applaud you for looking into alternatives before having your son put on pills that could cuase other issues.

I wish you the best. If you want to know more about detoxifying him and your house, email me privately and I will tell you all i know! =-)

Good luck to you and your family!

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L.H.

answers from Seattle on

I have 2 children with Add, and after our first was diagnosed my husband also determined that he to has ADD. It took a while to find the right drug for my son. Once he got on the right drug life has been so good for him both at school and socially. We also did biofeedback with him and that seemed to help but it was very expensive so we had to quit. Good luck to you, it is a hard road.

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R.G.

answers from Eugene on

I have a 7 1/2 year old son who is in the same boat. Very smart, tests high, excellent reading and math skills. But he is like a machine, go go go! We met with our doctor and are going to meet with a child psychologist who specializes in ADHD. In the mean time, Doc said make sure the child gets protein with every meal and plenty of rest. Sometimes sleep disorders can present as ADD/ADHD symptoms. If your child snores, this is something to check out. Other than that we have ordered 2 natural products (I am not into the hard meds either). One is PediaCalm, and the other is PediActive. You can do a google search for them. Until they arrive, we got a natural product (at Fred Meyer) called Calms Forte for children. It helps them to settle down at night time. Do all of your research, meet with your pediatrician, talk to the teacher and principal more. My husband did bring up a good point though, "is it fair to avoid a diagnosis and medication, if in fact this biological disorder is present in our son?" Not doing anything will isolate them and eventually the other kids will turn against the wild child who is a major distraction. Self esteem will suffer as will relationships with peers, adults and parents. Take care and know that you are not alone. You can email me anytime, ____@____.com. I am located in Eugene, OR.

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E.K.

answers from Eugene on

Does your son sleep well at night? If not, he may have sleep anpea and his poor behavior is really just him trying to stay awake. It is just an idea. But i know it happen alot to kids. best of luck

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J.K.

answers from Portland on

i also have a child that i suspect might have add or adhd as he acts alot like my nephews who both suffer from it (as my brothers both did as well). my brother was on ritilin and it was aweful. but my nephew is on something else, i'll be danged if i can think of it, and hes an absolutely normal child! it doesn't drug him like ritalin does, it just makes him act like a normal person. i think a mark of a true add sufferer is that they don't become zombies when they are on the drugs. if the child is just hyper, then the drug will numb him, but if he truly suffers from it then it will help calm his mind. a child with adhd was on supernanny a few weeks ago (of course i didn't get to watch it lol) but they did some things with the child that helped him do his homework and things, without drugs. i would talk to your ped, and def look online at different sites, because i know there can be help without it. the child will still be slightly hyper or whatever, but its better than drugs i think. here's a website, i didn't get a chance to puruse it totally, but hopefully there's something that will help. good luck!
http://www.healthcentral.com/drdean/408/60935.html

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K.G.

answers from Seattle on

I see you have already gotten some good advice. Definitly look into it. Have him evaluated and check on the possible sleep issues. My one addition is to be open to the possibility of medication. It is not for every kiddo but it was the right option for my 5.5 year old son. His med (Adderall XR) has very minimal side effects and we have had huge results. Again, he is smart as a whip but was too distracted by everything to really accomplish much at school. His impulsive out bursts were getting him into "trouble" and affecting his self-esteem. Now, his true self is shining through and doing so well at school. He can even pay attention and follow tae kwondo instruction and loving it. Hope you find something that works for him.

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A.M.

answers from Portland on

Good Evening A.~
I was reading your concerning of your son. My youngest was diagnosed with ADHD by our family ped. We too were very concerned about how to treat our son. We tried the low sugar/no sugar diet this was very difficult, to say the least short of becoming vegetrians. Absolutely almost everything has some amount of sugar content.
We did lots of research on different medications. I have a younger brother that was medicated with ritalin too. I absolutely refused to use that at all. In doing our research we found a medication called Metadate CD. We presented the research to our ped; he too did research since he not heard of it and found it to be very safe and effective without many side effects. Our son was starting school and we just knew that he would not do well in school without something to control or balance the chemical imbalance he has.
I would talk with your ped about what you have recently been advised. There are test that can be done to confirm that is the issue with your son and what the proper measures are for his situation.
In our state it is against the law for a school teacher to tell a parent or even suggest that a child is ADD or ADHD. If a teacher does we as parents can hold the school responsible for all education, treatment, etc required. I dont know what state you are in, but if you are in Oregon lucky for you. You would now be able to send your child to private school and the school district has to pay for it.
First and foremost I would talk with his doctor and go from there.
I hope this helps and Good Luck. Feel free to send me a personal email if you wish or have further questions
____@____.com

Best Wishes,
A.

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M.W.

answers from Seattle on

There is something that has to do with diet.Check into his diet and search on line.

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R.S.

answers from Bellingham on

Please, I'm no expert here, but if you are able to go the route of no-drugs, I think that is best. My Niece is EXTREMELY ADHD. She is also super smart. Her parents have her on a drug similar to Ritalin because their medical covers it. As soon as she misses the drug, she reverts back to extreme hyper-activity. Her parents have had to change Doctors because one Doc said she shouldn't be on meds during vacation times....only during school. She is so hyper that her playmates don't want to be around her when she's not on meds. It is a rough life for her. I did some studying on the natural way to treat this...but the parents said they couldn't do it financially and didn't think that their daughter would go for it. I think homeopathy should be considered anytime we are told to start giving our children drugs on a regular basis . ADHD are often deficient in Fatty Acids so you can add to the family food; primrose oil, borage oil, or flaxseed oil- he won't even notice. If you want to go the homeopathy route, you may need to change the family diet a little starting with eliminating sugar and sugar substitutes. It is the first thing your natural Doc will tell you to get rid of. Try honey. It is less acidic. It will be better for him to learn to take care of it through diet while he is young. This often passes on to our adult life. This is what I found out from my research. wild oat-calms nervous system, Liquid Vit B complex relaxes-improves mental function and concentration, chamomile tea good at bedtime, Lemon balm-calms nerves-an antidepressant-for excitability, St.Johns's wort (can grow in your home)-for attention-calms mind-antidepressant, skullcap-sedative, valerian-for insomnia and anxiety, Dimethylaminoethanol (DMAE)-for attention-focus-concentration-memory, Pycnogenol (pine bark extract)-reduces agitation. A GOOD BOOK- Smart Medicine for a Healthier Child (Janet Zand, Robert Roundtree, Rachel Walton). General health book -focus is on "natural" ways to treat all sorts of things, with practicality, and information on traditional drugs as well without condemning them.

R.

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M.M.

answers from Portland on

I'm a in-home family child care provider with daycare children who were diagnosed ADD, ADHD & Sensory Integretion Dysfunction.

One of our best friend's 6-yr. son has been in my care since 8 mos. The mother & I took him to therapy at St. Vincent's Hospital (behavior/speech). A behavior specialist came was coming to their home on Mon. nights. His mother, our children, my daycare children & I used to sometimes get hit, kicked, had our hair pulled or bruised from his biting. This is how he dealt with his frustration not being able to communicate his feelings. He was removed from Preschool as he could not function on a 8 to 1 ratio in the classroom. The teachers & mother had me stay with him for 2 days. It did not make a difference and he could not return to Preschool. The mother and I continued to work with him at each of our homes. He no longer is in Special Needs Kinder and attends A.M. Kinder at a public school then p.m. Kinder M-Th at Beavertion Christian Church.

Some of the books from RedLeaf Press, Children's Book-of-the-Month Club or Overstock.com and workshops available to parents/family child care providers through Child Care Resource & Referral (CCR&R), Community Action, 1001 Baseline, Hillsboro, OR also helped me tremendously.

I presently have (1) ADHD 2nd gr. girl 1/2 hr. on school mornings, (1) Kinder boy w/ Sensory Integretion Dysfunction, (1) Kinder boy M-Th w/ whiny/anger issues & his 2nd gr. brother M/Tu w/ ADHD. ...still reading up & enrolling in related classes...still learning...

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M.C.

answers from Spokane on

I on the other hand have a son that for 2 years i have been told by teachers that he has adhd and that he needs meds that that they know this , i had not been so sure of this and have just had his therpist go and watch him at school, she came back to me with a report that states that he dose not show any signs of typical adhd, he sat in his grp acted like a "boy" she did advise me that my son dose have anxiety problems, and people often mistake anxiety for adhd, i have looked a lot in to this over the past couple of weeks, for they all state that adhd is a gateway for bipolor and that is why i did but since i had the therpist watch him and the class room she has ruled this out, dont get me wrong my son gets hyper and all, but a child with true adhd can not focus at all even when mom or dad is around, may go observe for your self to see if he acts "wild". i am not for meds if this is not truly needed that is why i have done so much research on this to see why , my sons teacher states that he has no friends no one likes him and that he will not turn in his work , but his wasl test are above avarage, i did not understand, good luck i know it is hard

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