Allergies and Daycare

I'd contact International Chiropractic Pediatric Assoc, and handle her diet, and not let her out of my site until that is done.You are so right- have her cared for at home.
Best of luck-k

With so many allergies you should keep her home longer. It seems like 2 is way to early for any kind of school where she will be exposed to the very allergens she suffers from plus others. Why not keep her at home a couple of years while she grows healthier and learn what she can or not eat?

If you can keep her home and not put her in day care DO IT. Kids 2 years old DO NOT benefit from being in a large group of kids. They benefit from being with their Moms/families.

I put my sons in "pre-school" when they were 3 1/2 "for their own good" so they could learn how to be "socialized". If I could take back those years I would. They did OK, but it was not "best for them" as most people believe. What's best for your daughter and you is what works for your family.

Read Learning All the Time (or anything) by John Holt. We are all so programmed to assume that "schools" can do better than we as parents can. It is not true, and we may be ruining our kids by starting them in "school" earlier and earlier.

Sorry for the soapbox moment. I always feel that if we would just stop and think and use our own individual logic and judgement instead of doing what everyone else does, we'd be a lot better off as a society.

First, let me just say that I absolutely don't agree with some of the moms that believe that daycare is only for parents with no other choice. I believe that acclimating a child to large groups can really help with socialization issues once in kindergarten. Having said that, my oldest never went to daycare and was perfectly fine academically starting at 5, though it took the first half of the year to get him used to all those kids. However, I did send my 2nd to Pre-k this past year. He absolutely flourished. He was quite rambunctious and headstrong when he started. Though he can still be a bit stubborn, he has a much better understanding of how his behavior effects his privileges and really enjoys learining. I guess having a lot of new friends is quite the motivator. He can't wait for school to start to see his friends again.

I don't have much experience with severe allergies. However, have you considered sending her part-time between meals. If it is an option, could you send her in the morning after she eats breakfast at home and pick her up 3-4 hours later before they start lunch. That way she gets some experience in the school setting and with fun activities, but you can keep an eye on her meals.

good luck

My children never went to daycare. If you have a home care option, don't feel guilting about not sending her to a preschool. I worked on preschool skills at home with my girls. State funded VPK didn't exist for my oldest, but I prepared her at home and she successfully started kindergarten just before she turned 5. My other daughter had the opportunity for VPK when she was 4. We did that because it was free and she did fabulous as well.

On the other hand, if you HAVE to use a daycare setting because you work, the preschool is obligated and liable to make sure your daughter doesn't get exposed to known allergens.

I don't think a kid is missing out by not being in daycare or by starting later in age. I think especially with your child's allergies, if you can socialize her with your friends kids and can manage not putting her in daycare (if you can afford to be home) it is worth it. My daughter is 4 and never been to daycare and is social and well-rounded. I don't think she missed out on anything. We get together with various friends for playdates regularly
Have you sat the employees of the daycare down and explained the severity of your child's allergies? Can you make a cute little button to pin on her clothes that says, "remember I'm allergic to...." but maybe it's round and has flower petals and is cute so she won't mind wearing it. I guess the problem is more that people don't read labels and a lot of those things she is allergic to are in everything.

You need to talk to the school about your child's needs and if they can't accommodate them then you need to take her out and either keep her home or find a place that is sensitive and will care for a childs allergic needs. My daughter also has many food allergies and I have her at an in home daycare 2 days a week and they are very accommodating to her needs and I haven't had any problems at all. I've gotten to owner/teacher into reading labels and looking out for the items that my daughter can't have and if they are not willing to do that then they don't need to care for your daughter. Good luck with that one and hope that it works out as it is good for them to interact with other kids at this age and start to get some structured activities.

I have 4 kids and always started them at age 3. The pediatrician has told me that before that it is glorified daycare and the exposure to germs is too much for most little ones systems. My friends who did put their kids in earlier experienced far more illness in their home than we did. My advice to you is to keep her out and get the Dr's advice about allergies and when to mainstream her. There are many wonderful options that can provide you with a break and give your daughter the socialization she would receive at school. When I had only 2 small kids I started a "co-op" with 3 other moms. We each had 2 kids. We had a schedule we preset that allowed 2 moms to leave their kids with the other 2 moms for 3 hours. We set up "portacrib city" for the smallest ones' naps and let the others play. It gave 2 moms the chance to visit while watching the kids (adult conversation is much needed at this stage of life) and 2 moms a break. It worked so well we did it for almost 4 years. After our oldest kids started to school we all had had a third child by then and continued it with our 2nd and 3rd children! Anyhow, I do not think my children suffered at all by not starting school until age 3. My 6th grader just received the most awards in her class for citizenship, academics, music... Your involvement in her life and her schooling will do more for her than a year of 2 year old babysitting! You can do it!! Good luck

Sandy and Sandi said it beautifully!

If you don't NEED to send her to daycare ("school" or "preK" or whatever label you wish to use)...then DON'T! Up until the age of 5 or so, the child can flourish perfectly with the care of her parents, as she was designed to do...not paid strangers.

My son will be 2 in another week and already knows his entire alphabet, numbers 1-9, colors and plays often with other kids. I know what goes into his meals because I prepare them. I know where any bruise or scrape comes from, because I am with him. I get to be the one to see him explore new things, say new words, etc.

There is no benefit to turning your child over to someone else if you have the option of caring for her yourself. I know there are those who must use daycare because of financial issues, but if you don't need to send her away, don't.

i didn't put my daughter in school until she went to vpk. i think that it was the right decision at the time for my family. i also have a son who is 2 years younger. i feel for him he was bored bc he was used to playing with his sister and i just didn't cut it with playing w/ him. so since she is now starting kindergarten, i am going to put my son in the 3yo class. i believe that he will enjoy the other children and the environment bc it is more like a school than a daycare where they play all the time. however, if he doesn't adjust and he doesn't like it i will pull him out until he is 4 and then put hiim in the vpk program. my ped. always said it's best to keep them home with you for as long as you can if you are able.

First of all, starting her later may not solve the problem with the allergies, other than the fact that when she's a bit older she will be able to discern better for herself what she shouldn't be eating. As far as your main question goes, my opinion is that as long as she is being enriched at home she doesn't need to start preschool until she's 3 or even 4 - she'll be fine. I think the more time spent with mom the better. My oldest daughter (now 4) started preschool at 2.5 only 2 days a week for 3 hours - I felt she was ready because her vocabulary and communication skills were terrific and she really enjoyed it. Then we moved and I kept her home for several months before starting her again here in Florida, part-time, sjortly before her 4th birthday. She loves school. My youngest daughter (she'll be 3 in Nov) has not yet started and I don't think I will start her in preschool until around 3 1/2 - mostly a financial decision, but I'm not worried whatsoever that she'll suffer educationally at all. I hope this helps. Go with your gut and she'll be fine.

Ok, so my ideas will be totally different it seems then the others you have gotten. Right now I am a SAHM to 2 kids (3 1/2 yrs and 10 mos) I am also an elementary school teacher, been on leave for a year. First of all, read all the advice but base your decision on what works for YOU and YOUR FAMILY best. All children are different. My son does attend a daycare full time when I am working - he started at 10 mos. He loves it - the have a curriculum and follow the school year calendar but work at the developmental level for the children. This year while I am home, he has continued to go part time. I struggled with this idea but it was the best for him. He needs time away from me, likes to socialize with a big group and have some independence and attention on him. School is not a bad thing, even at a young age. Yes, there are activities and play groups you can attend on your own - if that works for you. You might just need to try different programs in your area to find one that works best. You can be her teacher at home if you prefer, as a school teacher, we often remind parents they are their child's first teacher. Having the school setting experience can be a good thing, sometimes it makes it easier for the children to adjust when it is time to attend school (kindergarten). This really depends on your child.
As for the allergies - that is nothing to fool around with. First, meet with the director and her actual teachers and give them a list of her allergies. One solution might be that you send her meals for her. They really should work with you to find the best solution. Again, you may need to check other facilities. In my son's school, there were 3 of the 10 in his class with allergies - I knew because there were signs as reminders and when we sent snacks we were given reminders. As she gets older, she will learn what she can and can't have. At this age, that is too much to ask for her to monitor. She is probably naturally curious and will try other kids foods if allowed to - always happens :>)
Good Luck! I don't mean to sound down on those moms whose advice was to keep her home, but daycare (the right type of place) is not such an awful option either. Remember, do what works best for you! She will be fine.

Do you work? If you don't, I would absolutely positively not send her to daycare. Daycare is for kids with no other choice - there is no better place for her than with you! If you do work, and need to send her somewhere to be cared for during the day, I would try a private home-care situation. That way you know who is taking care of your child, and you know they are doing it properly and that your child is receiving love and feels secure. I wouldn't take a chance on a pre-pre school with a child with allergies.
Good luck in whatever you decide.

You must make it known to all who will have contact w/your daughter about what she CANNOT eat. Pack her lunch and all snacks for her. I would emphasize how allergic she is. All don't understand what serious food allergies can do to a child.

Wether or not she is in school is up to you. As long as she has interaction with other kids then it is really up to you. With my daughte, If I could stay home with her I wouls in a heart beat. When my husband was out of work for 6 months we kept her in day care only 2 days a week. So she could play and socialize. YOU ARE NOT DOING HER A DISSERVICE IF YOU KEEP HER HOME WITH YOU! Thats my opinion. Just make sure she has some interation with other kids.

If you have already alerted the day care of her allergies and they are disregarding them, its time to change day cares!!! Or you can bring her own lunch and snacks for the day. That way you know she is eating properly.

Good Luck!

keep her at home for as long as possible...and benadryl is a toxic otc narcotic...there must be something else to calm her stomach. Read up on "Indigo children"
Blessings, S.

I have a wonderful referral for a doctor who can help you determine what things your child is allergic to, works naturally and with herbs and homeopathy, and can really make a difference.
Dr. Kitay, ###-###-####

I am part of a very active Playgroup & none of the kids attends daycare. As long as you spend quality time & intellectually stimulate your child there is NO reason that you have to send them to daycare. If you choose preK the year before Kindergated, it is still a choice.

Teach the alphabet, numbers, colors, shapes, how to spell name & phone # & your child will surpass the rest! If you need social skills- join a playgroup. Kids take food from their peers (or give to) so she needs to be older to know what she can/can't have)