Hi!
I'm hoping you guys can help...I have a 3 year old boy and I'm pregnant with my second child (a girl) and due Feb 14th. My sisters, mom and mother in law want to have a baby shower because the shower I had for my son I couldn't go to because I was in labor! My question is...Do I register? I don't really need much in the way of girl clothes and things like that because I have 2 neices that are my sons age so I have enough hand me downs to last me 2 years! But should I register for some other things that didn't make it through 3 years of my son? Also, who do I have them invite? Should I only invite a few people? or should I invite all the people who came to the last one? Is there such thing as a "gift free shower" or am I putting too much thought into this? I just don't want people to feel obligated to buy me gifts.. What are your opinions?
Another shower is not needed. My suggestion would be to have a few friends, and some family at a dinner or something. Celebrate baby...something along that line....I wish my SIL would not have another shower, but she is...This is number three......I just think it is crazy!
You can always register for a charity. Like a shelter for women. And celebrate the baby.
I agree with Denise. I don't think a second shower so close together is appropriate. I can see if someone has their two children 10 years apart but not three. Times are tough right now and there could be feelings of resentment that they were invited to your second shower. I think you should have a party/brunch with your sisters, mother and mother-in-law.
I hadn't had time to reply before, but since you asked for opinions, here's mine-- I say, no second shower.
If you want to have a small, "meet the baby get together" or a small afternoon tea gathering for really really close supportive family before the baby then fine.
This may sound contradictory, but i do say, go ahead and register for what you think you NEED. But only offer the registry if someone approaches you and asks "what do you Need?"
I think of it this way. People that love you and your little one will show up with outfits and toys etc, and the ones that wouldn't do that automatically, well they really don't want to be obligated to attend your second shower anyway. So when you look at it that way, Having the second shower becomes more about the gifts than just hanging out with the people you love. ANd you have said that gifts aren't your focus.
If you have a close family member that would be willing to organize meals for your or something like that you could have the opportunity to show the baby off in your home, little bit by little bit. To me that would still feel like a celebration but with out all the hassle.
Obviously this is only my opinion and if it makes you happy to have a second shower that you actually get to attend, then go for it. Have fun with your new little one, what ever you decide.
e.
I personally don't see anything wrong with celebrating a new life, and Valentine's day is a great b-day, (mine is that day). Anyway, if you feel weird about registering, ask for diapers and wipes. We all know you could use them. As far as who to invite, I would invite close family and friends to the shower. Maybe make this one a little more intimate than the last. COngrats!
Second showers are typically smaller. I would say no registry but get the word out about what you need. Since you're having a girl, you're not going to be able to use a lot of hand me downs. But definitely celebrate! Each life is such a precious gift from God. Good luck!
I like the "meals shower" idea. It's so easy to accumulate stuff that they go through so quickly and chances are if you made it through one kid without it, you don't really need it. Diapers and wipes are good too, but I'm picky about brands and styles as I have kids with really sensitive skin. The idea of assigning sizes is cute, but you'd have to save some of those diapers for so long! Plus my kids never made it past a size 3 before they were trained (just because they are little, not necessarily early trainers). I'd stick with assigning sizes newborn and 1. Then assign others the wipes.
My 1st and 2nd children were 10 years apart. I had saved almost everything in the attic so I had many things and really did not need to update too much. Even my initial stash of clothing that I used for my daugther were gender neutral and could be used for the son we knew we were having.
I declined a shower cause I thought it was asking. The girls at work did one anyways.
They ended up doing a nice luncheon for about 12 people. I got lots of nice boys clothing in the next sizing up that was needed.
I think focusing on the gathering and the celebration of having a the new baby is great with a disclaimer of no gifts needed.
I have had people having a new baby request cloth diapers. A person will have 3 made in selected fibers, the next maybe 3 or 6, some have bought 12 or a silk sling. Before you know it the new mom had an entire years worth of cloth diapers that were preselected colors or prints and they helped her build an entire 1st two stashes.
Practical gifting of cloth nursing pads, slings, wipes, diapers are gifts that last for a very long time and keep gifting over and over and can be re-gifted to others when your done or put away for another baby.
Just tossing out an idea or two.
Congrats and good luck with your newest arrival.
Hi C.,
I'm probably going to get a lot of flack for this but I think O. baby shower is enough. I understand that you weren't (physically) there, but it was a shower. Lots of people disagree with this thought of no more than O., but let's face it--the shower is for the first baby when you have nothing and need everything. That's probably not the case here.
I think a more tasteful option would be for you, your mom, sisters, & MIL (close family and friends) to host a nice luncheon as a celebration of the new baby. The people who are close to you will be asking you what you need and buying gifts anyway......Just my opinion. Have fun whatever you decide to do!
I had a baby shower for both my kids and they were less than 2 years apart. my first one my mom gave me so my husbands extended family wasnt there and the second one my mother in law gave me. I think it would be fine to invite the same people. And yes I would register. When I registered for my second shower I did so for things I would need for my oldest, like a booster seat for the table so the baby could have the highchair, a double stroller and an umbrella stroller. I also registered for a toddler seat. I know you probably already have these things but it is something to think about. You could also register for some books and movies, different things like that. I hope this helps, good luck with your baby!
I know so many women who would love to have baby showers after the first baby - for the bonding and friendship more than for the presents. And I know people who want to give useful presents that moms can really use. So what if you did a theme party that seemed less like a traditional baby shower. You could do a "diaper and wipes party" - assign each guest a diaper size. Or maybe a "stock the freezer party" where everyone brings a dish for you to thaw out and heat up when you bring your daughter home. Or what if you contact a local beauty school/massage school and see if you can get some students to come over and do mani/pedis, massages, etc - invite your friends and family to help you relax before the baby arrives. I would invite people you are close to now and that are likely to have an ongoing relationship with you and your baby, regardless of who was invited to the first one. Congratulations and have fun!
