Car Seat Crier

Updated on August 31, 2006
K.L. asks from Phoenix, AZ
30 answers

My son is almost 2 months old and HATES his car seat. We live in Phoenix so it is hot in the back of the car facing backward (this may be a source of the problem). Most of the time 1/2 way though a trip across town he starts crying/screaming. We have tried to ride in the back with him (this doesn't help). Giving a pacifier doesn't help either. He rides in a baby carier and we made sure that nothing is pinching him or that none of the straps are too tight. I thought maybe it was because he was slouched down, but he also cries in my mother in laws convertable (sits upright) seat.
WE are supposed to go on a trip soon, and I do not think I can handle many hours of crying (it would not be fair to him either!). Has anyone heard of babies with motion sickness?

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So What Happened?

Wow Thank you for all of your responses! I found some great advice from all the moms out there! WE talked to his pediatrician who couldn't help. We went on a trip to San Diego (6 hours) but we left right when he was going to sleep. This worked AWESOME! The crying still continues in city, but my new observation is that he is tired from the movement and cant get himself to sleep. So, I hold his binki in his mouth with one had and drive with the other (quite a sight). This seems to work most of the time. I have new toys and a great soft seat that wraps around his head, and is very comfortable.
Again thanks your advice was incredible!

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J.L.

answers from Phoenix on

Hi K.,
My son also cried from 2 mo to 4 mo - yes, for 2 months! I tried various car seat activity toys, playing kids music, singing songs, etc. (The only thing that helped was having someone sit next to him and entertain him, but I rarely had another person in the car with us.) Then we moved him from the middle position to the right side so that he could see out of the window. Voila! No more crying. Caveat: the middle position is supposed to be the safest. But, I decided that I would be a better driver if I didn't have to hear my baby crying, and if having him on the side instead of the middle made the crying stop, then so be it...

Good luck!
JL

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A.

answers from Albuquerque on

Elizabeth Pantley wrote an article for republication about carseat crying. If you can't find it via an internet search, email me and I'll be happy to forward it to you. Good luck!

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D.D.

answers from Phoenix on

Hi,
That is the worst. My daughter is 9 months. She went through a phase of that and we both work full time so had no choice but to keep putting her in the darn seat. She stopped crying one day and now gets fussy if she doesn't want to go someplace but for the most part is good about it. The summer is the worst. I hate the backwards facing carseats in the summer! My baby is always hot and sweaty after a trip.

Deb

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M.C.

answers from Phoenix on

My youngest daughter did the same thing, we later found out she had Acid Reflux, but that was about the age when our problems started. Good luck.

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T.H.

answers from Tucson on

My daughter also hated her carseat, so I know exactly how you feel! The good news is, once she got to 2.5 or 3 months old, she started enjoying car rides most the time. The only trick we found that worked was driving while she slept. We'd play with her until she started getting drowsy, then I'd nurse her until she fell asleep, then we'd sneak her into her carseat. That was the only thing that worked. She never seemed to be carsick- she really just seemed to want to be with us. I'm sure it'll get easier for you guys- hang in there!

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N.

answers from Phoenix on

My son did the EXACT same thing. Sorry. No tidbits of wisdom but the hope that this does eventually pass. As hard as it is, take comfort in the fact that he is safe. Summer and rear facing will pass, and he will very likely get over his scraming way before then. We went on a road trip when my son was about 3 months old and he cried from Gila Bend to San Diego. That was a LONG time. But he survived it just fine (had a heck of a workout), didn't do that on the way home, and has been much better since. I don't know the answer or magic, but live your life, comfort as you can, and know that he is safe. Good luck.

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P.

answers from Lubbock on

My daughter was the same way. She hated the car seat from the beginning. When she was 3 months old we took her on her first road trip and it was a diaster. It was an eight hour drive and besides the two naps she cried all the way. What was worse than that, when we came home anytime we went anywhere she freaked out and screamed and cried fearing she would be in the car seat for a long period of time. This didn't stop until she was big enough to ride in a front facing car seat. My advice is just to wait it out because there is no hope.

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S.

answers from Phoenix on

Hi K.-my daughter did the same thing. We went the cheap way, we take a towel and put those cool packs with gel in the flexible plastic packs things you can get at the store. Put it folded up in the towel on the back of the car seat before you put the child down.

It keeps them cool and happy! Or you can purchase this:

Cold Seat Freezable Car Seat Cooler at bargains4babies.com for about $50. There are other styles, mfg. available but the cool pack works and it's way less expensive. Good luck!

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M.M.

answers from Phoenix on

I (and 2 of my friends) had summer babies and went through the same thing. We found a solution, but it's not for everyone. We bought a portable DVD player and attached it to the back seat. We played Baby Einstein and it worked MOST of the time. I know that TV is not a babysitter, but it did allow us to drive and keep our sanity. You just need to ensure that it is securely fastened. I kept mine in the seat next to my daughter, she could still see it, and I felt safer. Good luck.

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A.D.

answers from Fort Collins on

K.,

When my son was a baby, we had lived in FL at the time; it is also a very sun intense region of the country. His eyes were very sensitive to the sun. Even though our car had tinting, it wasn't dark enough for him. I bought special peel-on sun tint window screens for the entire back and side windows (anywhere sun could come through the windows and affect his eyes). After I placed the tint window screens onto the windows, he was a much more peaceful and happy child.

A. D.

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M.

answers from Albuquerque on

Buy a shade for the back and side window of the cars they sell them in baby sections especially at baby r us in various sizes. Make sure are conditioner is on at a comfortable temp. Hydrate your baby and by mirrors, located in baby sections so you can see your baby. Put some safe baby toys that go over the baby carrier. Look at items on line that can make that baby comfortable. Also look at safely tinting your windows along with using baby shades. Make sure you can see safely outside the car. There's some mirrors you can stick on the front window and back to see the baby.

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J.R.

answers from Phoenix on

We had the same problem with our daughter until we did a road trip to LA with a stop in Joshua Tree. It was a long 8 hours plus for an 8 week old baby to be strapped in her carseat. We rigged a dvd player across the back of our expedition and played Fun Baby and Calm Baby for her. She either watched it or it helped her fall asleep. There wasn't too much crying once she figured out that we weren't stopping anytime soon. And to our amazement she slept all the way home from LA with the exception of stopping in Blythe to feed her. The road trip was the cure-all!!! She is pretty content about 95% of the time now. Good Luck!

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D.W.

answers from Phoenix on

Car seats sometimes have a inner pad in them that only goes down to the lower back and not under the bottom of the baby. Lift the outer pad out of yours, to expose the inner plastic, and check it out. If the foam pad only goes down partially, then replace it with a towel or longer foam pad. The abrupt edge of the inner foam pad can create an uncomfortable pressure point that is is enough to make anyone uncomfortable.

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T.F.

answers from Tucson on

I have found the DVD players help and you can get baby DVD's to entertain him plus, you can buy clip on fans that really work to keep him cool.
We live in Benson, AZ so, I know how hot they can get in the back.

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S.

answers from Phoenix on

K.,
Yes babies can have motion sickness. Just like anyone else. I remember when my sister was born. She had it terrible. We could not even go to the grocery store without her being upset and as she got older she threw up all over. That is how my mother figured out that it had been motion sickness all along. I do not know what was done about it, due to being so young. I would call your son's doctor and tell him that your son has motion sickness in the car. Ask him what you can give him to help elivate him. Doctors sometimes do not give us all the best advise so be sure to listen to your own intuition as well. You know your son the best and you will know what feels right. Go to a Natural Store like GNC or Natures Alternative as well. I know of one at the Scottsdale 101 "mall". They are very helpful there. It is near the Starbucks, Verizon, Coming Event, Subway, Beauty First Store and next to it is a Natural Store with vitamins and ect... I got my daughters teething tablets there. They may be able to help you with something that is natural to help your son out. I hope this helps.
S.

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T.Z.

answers from Phoenix on

I have a friend who's daughter always cried a few minutes into any car trip. In the end it turned out she just didn't like sitting in the car seat at all. Once she hit a year and a half she stoped crying in the car. This is just another step in life. Try feeding him a bottle/nursing while driving or wait till nap time.

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C.

answers from Fort Collins on

I have three daughters and NONE OF THEM liked the car seat as a baby. My youngest is about 5 months old and she is just now getting a little more comfortable in it. To be honest, I think it's just a baby thing! I personally think every enfant car seat sucks (excuse my language!) No one seems to have figured out how to make a baby car seat that a baby doesn't mind being in, whether it is a trip to the grocery store, or a trip across the state! It's a bummer! All you can do is hang in there!! It does get better!

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R.K.

answers from Denver on

It's my guess that if your son had motion sickness that he would actually be getting sick, not just crying. It seems like he just doesn't like being in a car seat - my son was the same way. My advice is pretty taboo, and I never did use this for a car ride, but when I flew with my son as an infant I gave him Benadryl. He slept soundly from begining to end - it was a dream come true! Good Luck!!!

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B.

answers from Phoenix on

My son didn't like car rides either when he was that age, especially when we would take long trips to go visit my mother. I would suggest buying a children's CD that you can listen to in the car. I always had a fun CD and a lullaby CD (to put him to sleep!). I highly recommend Fisher Price Little People: Sing Along Favorites http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B000067Q3I/sr=1-1/qid=11...
This one won't drive you absolutely bonkers like some of the others. The lullaby one we used was Disney's Lullaby Albumn http://www.amazon.com/s/ref=nb_ss_m/102-###-###-####-###-...
Be careful that it doesn't put you to sleep too!

If you are worried about the heat back there you could try buying a fan for your car. They have car fans at Walmart that plug into the cigarette lighter. They're not very expensive (I think $10-$15). They have a long cord and a clip so you could probably rig it for the back seat. I bought one for my car because I had the same concern for my son and I was really impressed by how much of a difference it made.

Oh, you could try propping up some soft toys around his car seat (stuff that won't hurt him if it hits him). Sometimes my son liked to have something fun to look at. You might have to stop occasionally though to put it all back after he knocks everything away!

Don't feel like a bad mom, either if he does cry a bit. I've never heard of any kid that age that enjoyed long car trips. Crying is just a way of expressing his dislike. It's not hurting him any. I know this sounds horrible, but eventually, he's going to wear himself out and fall asleep. Just do what you can and get there. Good luck!

B.

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T.S.

answers from Albany on

My son, now 4, used to get so hysterical EVERY time we got in the car he would make himself throw up. Even if it was only a 5 minute drive. This seriously lasted until he was turned around at 1. I can only assume he had motion sickness, or that watching everything go past him so quickly upset him. We tried to time everything so that we would get in the car shortly before we had to leave. Our long trips always started around 9pm, all the others were around nap times. Of course it didn't always work. To get him to sleep, and both my husband and I were there, I'd sit in the back when we'd start off and feed him a bottle. That also helped. Seriously, good luck.

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V.M.

answers from Austin on

My daughter is 9 months old but hated her car seat the first four months. We thought it might be the strap too, or the sun. We even put a blanket under her car seat to try to level it out more. Eventually we found that it was colic that she just happen to get when in that exact position. A pacifier helped but when she spit it out we tried those gas drops and eventually she out grew it. Now she doesn't love her car seat but she's more content.

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J.J.

answers from Phoenix on

I feel for you. I was luck to have a mellow baby, but she did get a little cranky at the begining. I went and got an Eddie Bauer mirror that you strap on to the head rest of the seat the child is sitting in. It has a cute little bear like stuffed animal around the mirror and I think that helps them a little bit. It's worth a try. Keep the box though as if it doesn't work you can take it back. I think I spent $15 on mine.
As far as the car seats go, I agree that they all suck. I have a Jetta and I am 5'9" and my husband is 6'4". We have NO room in the car with these huge honkin car seat contraptions. If you know of a sleaker car seat, let me know.
Good luck.

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N.C.

answers from Phoenix on

We had this same problem with our daughter. What worked was to go up to the convertible car seat. She liked the bigger seat and being higher up.

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S.C.

answers from Phoenix on

Both of my sons cried in the car ALL THE TIME when they were little. My first son finally stopped when we turned him around at 12 months. My second son lessened his crying when we took him out of the bucket seat and put him in a regular car seat. I think the upright position seems to help some. From what i gather from other mothers some children just hate being in the car.

We took our first son to Tucson when he was about 2 months old and the 2 hour trip took us nearly 5 hours since we stopped to nurse and change him so often (endless cycle).

For your trip you might just try to plan to leave right at a time when he is ready to nap. I used this method with my second son since we travel aobut 45 minutes to work and sometimes I would still have to stop for him but sometimes we made it.

Best of luck to you. I know it's not much help but they do grow out of it.

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M.R.

answers from Fort Collins on

Hello K.,

Have you heard of homeopathy? I would try chamomile for your son. It is a soother for irritablity, teething etc... I would get Hylands brand 6x strength. Give 2 pellets as needed there are no side effects and instantly dissolves as it touches his tongue. Don't worry if he spits it out it has already helped him by being in his mouth. Try to not touch it with your hands give it to him by the cap. Also, For motion sickness I would try opening the windows fresh air helps. The homeopathy remedy for motion sickness is Cocculus again try the 6x potency. Give 2 pellets every 15 minutes up to 3 doses. Hope this helps I would take some test runs before your trip and see which works best! Melanie

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K.P.

answers from Phoenix on

I know what you mean about not liking the carseat. My son who is now 6 months used to hate riding in the car in the carseat. It was miserable...however, he grew out of it at about 3 months all on his own. For some strange reason. Now he loves riding in the car and he finally falls asleep in the car. The only think I can say is make sure he has enough to eat before he gets put into the carseat but other than that he will grow out of it.

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S.

answers from Denver on

When my son was an infant(now 4), he also screamed anytime we went for a ride in the car. He also screamed in the stroller and on airplanes. For him, it turned out to be a combination of things. First, he had reflux (not just the normal spitting up but big spit ups)and sitting in a car seat, especially after a feeding, put pressure in all the wrong places and made his symptoms (heartburn) worse. Also, he had fluid buildup in his ears constantly and thus lots of ear infections (reflux and ear infections often go together). That too can make motion uncomfortable. When we started treating his reflux & fluid buildup in the ears(for him it required medication), it made a big difference. If you think your son might be getting motion sickness, it may be worth asking your doctor about fluid in the ears and/or pediatric reflux. Good luck!

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T.H.

answers from Phoenix on

My son hated to be in the carseat too. He is now almost 3 and he does better but still not great. We tried little toys attached to his carseat, singing, pacifier, I sat in back with him when I could, everything we could think of. Unfortunately for him he just kind of grew out of it a little. Even still he's not thrilled being in the car for a long time. I am sorry, no help other than I have been there, I know what you are going through. Good luck!
T.

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C.B.

answers from Phoenix on

My eldest used to do that as well. First off, it is quite possible he has an ear infection and/or is teething (yes, my son was teething at 2 months - the teeth don't actually come in then, but they "move around" and irritate the gums) but, the biggest reason most kids cry is boredom. Try getting one of those "view me" mirrors for the baby (it's a mirror on the back of the seat that allows you to see them in your rearview if needed, but is not glass so is safe for baby). Also, a mister and one of those clip on fans (with the soft blades so it cannot hurt anyone) would help to keep him cool in the back seat. I bring a spray bottle to mist my two if they look too warm. I don't know if he takes the bottle, but making sure he has teethy crackers or other such "tummy fillers" will keep him from being hungry, and then add a mobile or something else "toy" that he can bat but that does not have strings or chokey bits and he should be fine (oh, and letting a little bit of fresh air into the back seat never hurts either). Before any long trip, however, a visit to the pediatrition to check your child's ears is a good precaution.

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A.X.

answers from Grand Junction on

Is the sun in his eyes? That might be another thing. A.

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