CIO With Baby and Toddler

Updated on June 22, 2012
M.W. asks from Elkridge, MD
14 answers

I implemented the CIO method with my daughter (now 2 1/2). I plan on doing the same for my son (5 1/2 months) when the time comes. I am fearful though, because he seems to cry a lot harder and louder than she ever did. I am worried that if I let him cry it out, he will wake her up in the next room...?? Thoughts?

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K.M.

answers from Chicago on

Personally, I would look into a different method ... may I suggest looking into a miracle blanket and "The Happiest Baby on the Block" as an option?

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T.W.

answers from Syracuse on

I would look into a different method as well. If your baby is crying more than 10-min. and not falling back to sleep on his own, I would check on him. I had to swaddle my second son until he was 8 months old, it was the only way he'd sleep and they make swaddle blankets for older babies. "Happiest Baby On The Block" was very helpful for me as well.

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D..

answers from Charlotte on

Can you send her off to grandma's for a week? That's how long it would take to sleep train your son.

The alternative is to sit in the room beside his crib and touch his leg through the crib slats. Don't get up. Don't talk. Don't engage. He will know you are there and fall asleep. Each night he'll fall asleep sooner. Night wean him this way if you haven't already.

I'd do it before he learns to stand up. When they learn to stand up, they can't figure out for a while how to sit down, and scream their heads off holding onto the crib for dear life. Then you have to teach them how to sit down while you're trying to night train. Better to do it before.

Good luck!
Dawn

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J.A.

answers from Indianapolis on

Children adapt easily. My daughters are 19 months and 7 months. We moved the baby out of our room a few months ago, so they have been sharing ever since. I would have gladly kept her in our room longer, but she never slept well in our room. At first the baby crying disturbed her. But now the only thing that wakes her up is me walking in the room. Her sister will be crying loudly (she's a BIG screamer), and when I walk in to pick her up the older girl usually stirs and sometimes wakes up. She's getting used to it, though. If I get the baby early in the morning, the older girl will get up to close her door and lay back down. I worried about doing CIO for the same reasons you're facing, but it was MY issue and not my daughter's. So don't worry about it. Good luck.

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B.G.

answers from Champaign on

Have you ever considered the possibility of not using CIO? You could always try reading Elizabeth Pantley's "The No Cry Sleep Solution." Of course, this is assuming that your child has trouble sleeping. Does he have trouble sleeping now?

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J.S.

answers from Jacksonville on

I think you may be amazed what your kids will sleep through! My father in law snores like a bear. Seriously. We have a split house plan and I could hear him through in our room at the other side of the house! My daughters room is right next to theirs and I was afraid that he would keep her awake. However, it never even phased her.

We used CIO, when nothing, and I mean NOTHING else worked. After a couple weeks, she was going to sleep on her own pretty well. Regardless of what people tell you, our parents used it too and we all turned out just fine. :) Hopefully your son will adapt quickly, you may just have a couple rough nights ahead, but then it will be done and over. Good luck!

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C.C.

answers from Orlando on

CIO works. Get the book "Sleeping Through the Night" by Dr. Jodi Mindell. She offers all kinds of advice on how to make it work and what hurdles you can be up against. I agree your daughter's sleep may be disrupted the first night or two, but after that, if it works for your son, she should be fine.

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S.T.

answers from Washington DC on

well, i dunno. i don't think i've ever encountered a CIO question where the only concern was how loud it will get.
yes. it will be loud. and it will probably wake her up.
so are you looking for other things to try, or for ways to do CIO without it being disruptive?
khairete
S.

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J.S.

answers from Columbia on

Then she wakes up.

After 3-5 days, nobody will be waking up. I think she'll be just fine, and ultimately thankful for the years of sleep.

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R.R.

answers from Los Angeles on

Truthfully I doubt your son will wake your daughter in the next room, if kids are tired they usually will sleep no matter what or stir and go back to sleep. What you could do if this still concerns you at the time you implement CIO with him is stagger their bedtimes so he's going to bed earlier or later than your daughter, whichever works best for you.

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M.M.

answers from Chicago on

My kids rooms share a wall, and DD didn't wake up DS.

And if he does, just tuck your older one back in and tell him it's OK.

Do you have any kind of noise machines in the house? We use white noise with both of ours kids. Doesn't drown out crying, but helps to provide a constant in the background.

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C.B.

answers from San Francisco on

She may surprise you. She's probably used to hearing the baby cry so she very well might sleep through it. When my GS was an infant, his older brother (2-1/2 at the time) could sleep through the baby crying when the baby was in the same room! My daughter planned well - when the oldest was a baby she made sure to vacuum and play music etc when he was sleeping so he got used to sleeping through noise from the beginning. She never had any problems with the baby waking him.

D.S.

answers from Norfolk on

Hi, M.:

The only time that I let a child cry it out is when, he/she has to take a nap and he/she cries to get out of it.
What are the circumstances that you feel compelled to allow the baby/child cry it out?
Just want to know.
D.

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K.W.

answers from Youngstown on

My two boys ages 10 months and 4 years share a room. I had my 4 year old sleep on my 6 year old daughter's floor for a week while we implemented cry it out. Both big kids slept right through the crying. My baby has also cried at night some since and my 4 year old never wakes up. Kids learn to sleep through the baby's crying. Your daughter should be fine.

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