Do You Let Your Baby-sitter Use Your Computer?

Updated on May 24, 2012
A.M. asks from Rice Lake, WI
30 answers

Ok Ladies here's my question! My cousin's daughter watches my 1 and almost 4 yr old girls, she comes after school and only has them from 4 til about 5:30. The time between me going to work and my husband coming home from work. I give her $10 every-time she watches them, and feel is pretty good for the time she's here. So last night I came home from work and checked my history on my computer and saw she spent over an hr on my computer while she was here. Mixed feeling about it and want to know what you all think about it? Thanks

Jo W. I know how long she was on cause it shows every time you click on a new pg and I check the time stamps, there was one every few min for an hr, she was on facebook looking at ppls pics and profiles.

What can I do next?

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☼.S.

answers from Los Angeles on

Nope, I don't pay people for their phone or computer usage, I pay them to *play with* and *care for* my child.

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J.T.

answers from New York on

SO who was watching the kids??

Seriously. I would tell her what you saw and suggest that if she would rather go on line than watch the kids youwill find another sitter.... There are plenty of high school kids who would not mind the extra $$.

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S.H.

answers from Honolulu on

No way.

How will you prevent her from using the computer when you are not there?
I would, put a password on it.

is this babysitter a Teen?
Or adult?
Regardless, no way.

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C.S.

answers from Kansas City on

I did which is part of the reason I was happy to let her go. She was spending hours online facebooking, youtubeing, shopping and other non-essential things when she should have been taking care of my babies.

ETA: To clarify, the issue was not that she went online. The problem was the amount of time which was pretty much the entire time she was at our home. If she had wanted to do that while the babies napped that would have been fine. If we had seen activity that indicated that she was using the computer to find games or a show here and there for the babes that would have been fine. But we were seeing activity that started from when I left for work and ended shortly before my husband came in from work. As a parent I spend time on the computer when my children are napping or otherwise engaged. Also, I go days at a time without going online. Our person was online for long periods of time, every single day.

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J.S.

answers from Columbia on

We let our nanny (the one previously ummm...highlighted) use a laptop at the kitchen table - where she would be in the 'middle' of the play area.

Had no problems with that, as I do the same. And we have a 15mo.
______________________________________________
ETA - wow, I see I'm a minority of one. To each their own of course, but I certainly do not spend every second literally watching my son. I think if I would do that, I would only be able to work, do MP, housework, cook or laundry when he was right by my side or taking a nap - and that doesn't work too well in our home.

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C.B.

answers from San Francisco on

Since she's only there for a hour and a half and you do have a one year old, I don't think she should be on the computer. I would change the password so she can't log on.

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B..

answers from Dallas on

I don't have a babysitter, but I wouldn't allow it. I'm paying to watch my child, not the computer screen. It makes you wonders what your kids were up to while she was on the computer for an HOUR. Yikes.

Even if she wasn't actually using the computer the whole hour (Like Jo pointed out. I didn't think of that) you have to decide what you want to pay her for. Do you want her to be using the computer and not watching your kids? Probably not. Just set up a password, so she can't use it. Easy fix.

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A.C.

answers from Columbus on

No, I would not let her have access to my computer. She's there to watch the kids.

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☆.A.

answers from Pittsburgh on

This is what master passwords are for.

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X.O.

answers from Chicago on

Definitely not ok. For the 90 minutes she is being paid to watch your kids, she should be able to detach herself from FB. If she is doing that she is NOT watching your kids. Now is the perfect opportunity to teach her what employers expect of their employees. Most jobs prohibit their staff from using social media sites while they are on the clock.

If you don't want to talk to her about it, you could just put a password on the log-in screen. That's what I do both for the computer and for On Demand on the tv.

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H.P.

answers from Houston on

Nobody uses our computer but my husband and me. It's password-protected. If you have mixed feelings about if or how you should mention it to her, then maybe you should just set it to require a password as soon as it comes on. She won't be able to do anything with it.

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J.W.

answers from St. Louis on

How exactly do you know how long she was on the computer? The history only says what was visited not how long. I am only saying this because I have been "on" my computer for an hour but in that time I have cleaned the kitchen and as soon as I post this I am starting on the family room.

Ya know?

I love when sitters go on my computer, tells me what they are in to.

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J.B.

answers from Boston on

No way - my sitter is paid to watch my kids. Not only that, all of our computers are password-protected so a sitter wouldn't be able to get on any of the them anyway. She can pull herself away from FB for the 90 minutes she's getting paid to supervise your kids.

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I.X.

answers from Los Angeles on

I don't use a regular babysitter, but made the mistake of telling her she could check her email on the computer. I couldn't be sure but seemed to me she didn't interact much with my daughter. I so rarely use her I didn't say anything but I call it lesson learned. I will not allow babysitters on the computer anymore.

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I.W.

answers from Portland on

I'm a nanny & my agreement with the family I currently work for is:
Computer time is ok when kids are asleep, watching tv, or if they aren't needing my direct attention.

Example: right now the 3 year old is eating lunch, so I'm checking email, ect. I am sitting at the table with him.

I have a tablet I bring with me, so I rarely need to use theirs.

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T.F.

answers from Dallas on

Most importantly, you are paying her to watch your children, not be on the computer. Your children are 1 and 4 and that is not old enough to be self sufficient and not have someone with them, especially someone being paid to watch them. So NO, I would say off limits to the computer. Set your computer up with a password so no one can get on it, that will solve it as well.

No one can get on my laptop. When I walk away, it automatically closes out and if someone were to try to get on, they have to know my password.

Secondly, how old is she?

Lastly, the going sitter rate in my area is $10 per hour. My daughter 17.5 babysat last night from 6pm-midnight and got $80 cash. Now if your sitter is under 15, maybe your rate is more fair.

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T.B.

answers from Miami on

My computer is off limits, period. You can put a pass code lock on your computer so that only you can access it. At least, I have that option on my computer.

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V.W.

answers from Minneapolis on

When I was a nanny, the family offered to let me use their computer while their daughter was napping. I brought my own laptop and used that during nap time. I was still attending high school (It was an online high school) so I used that time to do my school work.

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J.L.

answers from Chicago on

No I would not. Where were your girls when she was doing this? Surely, she can keep a better eye on them for an hour and a half. I would put a password on your computer or if it isn't a laptop I would unplug it. This is a more subtle way of sending her the message not to use it or be direct and say listen for 1.5 hours please dont' use the computer I'd like you to play with the girls until I get home.

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J.B.

answers from San Francisco on

No the baby sitter is paid to babysit. If she watched them several hours it would be differen't.

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M.P.

answers from Minneapolis on

Well I house sat for some friends while they were gone for 4 weeks. They had lots of animals and a grown son. 21 year old in fact. Still living at home, but was gone for Basic Training for Army. I asked if I could install my Yahoo chat account. They agreed and said yes. Since they barely used their computer for much except keeping track of cattle. I did, and this was post divorce, so I was dating a few guys and we kept in touch via Yahoo. OK so people know what a man and woman like to talk about before marriage, before kids and so on and so forth. So I though it was all good, and I un-installed it. Or so I thought I did. Come to find out, son comes back from camp (this is a month after I was there) somehow realizes I didnt uninstall it correctly. I had kept my password on. He went in to my chat, and found messages via history. He showed all my private messages to his parents and told them I was using their computer for sexual exploits while I was taking care of the home. I explained as best I could, needless to say I never was called to house sit again. They were angry at first, cause their son said that it "just" popped up when he started the computer, but I refuted that and had to come and show exactly how he would have had to find that. It didnt matter they didnt want me back. So it can be a big problem if you break the trust of others when in their home, especially around kids. Can understand your concern, but its just profiles and pics thats she clicking on, not like MEGA involved chatting.

To be fair is the computer near an area where she can see the 1 year old? I am on the computer for work, as a part time thing, and I have a 5-3-1 and I am set up to see them when I am on the computer, but I can click a myriad of times even while yelling and telling kids to behave. I also jump up mighty fast if they need something.

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R.B.

answers from La Crosse on

Normally I don't mind if they are on the computer. I even have given the babysitter the computers main password because my computer is dumb and has be to restarted every so often or it stops working.

But... they are here all day. I don't watch them every sec of every day, the kids are old enough to do thier own things with out having to hang over them like when they are little. Now if they were on the compter all day I would have a problem.. but here and there while the kids are sleeping or playing together its not a problem.

With your sitter only being there for an hour and a half no I wouldn't want them to be on the computer. In that time she could be playing with them or getting them a snack something other than on the computer. She has plenty of time after going home to do those things.

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D.T.

answers from Muncie on

Keep checking that history and get her to tell you she's using it and for what. Get her to start asking to use it. She's family but she's also a bit of a guest. So long as she's using it for legit purposes/innocent games/school work, then no harm, the moment the history shows something sketchy then take action.

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J.K.

answers from Wausau on

No, I wouldn't let the sitter use my computer. I don't even let friends and family use it. There is a lot of personal and business information stored, and frankly, the way people tend to break their own machines is mind-boggling. I'm not letting a digital Typhoid Mary wreck mine.

They are welcome to bring their own laptop and use our wifi though.

A sitter that is only there for an hour in a half in the afternoon should be paying attention to the kids. If she was there at night while the kids were in bed, or the kids were older and doing their own thing while she was only there to make sure the house didn't burn down, that would be different.

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K.M.

answers from Chicago on

Now this is before the internet was in everyone's home, but when I was a sitter I was granted access to the computer for games as entertainment AFTER the kids went to sleep. I would not currently give a sitter access to my computer with the internet, but since I have a laptop I would simply put it away and put up the password. I think if she was doing school work/research that would be one thing and I would discuss it with her that you rather she let you know about the need for access first. Facebook is NOT something I would find okay for the sitter to be using PERIOD.

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S.S.

answers from Cincinnati on

my cousins watch my kids. They usually come over in pairs, so if I saw one was on the internet I really wouldn't think anything of it. Plus they babysitt for free so as long as they are keeping an eye on the kids they can use the computer all they want.

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G.B.

answers from Oklahoma City on

I was able to use my family's computers while I was there watching the kids. But most of the time the kids were on their computers at the same time. With a baby she is not paying enough attention to what is going on unless she is holding the baby in her lap the entire time.

I think I would find some other form of child care. There is after school care for the kids that go to school. Then the little one could just stay at child care a little longer. I don't understand where they are before she comes though.

Even if she is not on your computer she could be talking on the phone, surfing the internet or texting on her phone...she is not someone who sounds mature. But it is just babysitting for an hour or two. I would certainly not have her watch the kids for more than that.

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D.R.

answers from Minneapolis on

I'd say no, even if the kids were asleep, because there's just too much personal info on there that's no one else's business - but especially if it's waking hours and she's being paid to interact with the kids! Facebook is addictive, but it can wait!

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C.W.

answers from Sioux City on

Texting is another issue with nannies. Texting has become a hot-button issue lately. Should you allow your nanny to text while working? If so, do you limit the time or the occasions in which she can text? Do you allow her to text while driving? What should a family do?

Most families will allow nannies to text if texting does not interfere with childcare and other job responsibilities. For example, if the children are taking their naps and all the peripheral job tasks (laundry and light housekeeping) are done, then the nanny may text her friends and family.

Other families text their nannies often throughout the day. Texting can be the best way for working parents to keep up with what is going on in the daily lives of their children.

Most families do not allow nannies to text while driving. Some states have laws that forbid texting while driving. Texting while driving impairs the driver’s ability to drive well. Attentiveness to driving drops considerably. Studies have shown that people who text while driving have lower response times than people who drive drunk.

Allowing your nanny to get involved in texting can pose special problems because your children may then view inappropriate explicit texts. Although your children are not the sender or receiver of the text message, your children may come into contact with the text due to the fact that the cellular telephone on which the text message was sent or received is near your children and children are filled with curiosity about their environments.

Because what is appropriate is, to some degree, dependent on each family’s preference, each family should discuss the rules on texting with their nanny during their interviews and again at the time of hire. Then, if the nanny is found to have violated the rule, the parents can refer back to their original agreement with the nanny, remind / re-train the nanny on the boundaries and expectations, or take any progressive discipline necessary given the severity of the circumstance.

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M.L.

answers from Minneapolis on

If she is only there for 1.5 hours there is no reason she needs to be on the computer.

Put password protection on your computer and then you won't have to worry about her using it anymore.

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