Do You Think Graduations Are Ridiculous If......

Updated on June 03, 2011
J.J. asks from Pittsburgh, PA
42 answers

Do you think that preschool graduations are ridiculous if the class isn't moving on to kindergarten? For instance, My son had 4 years of preschool at different schools & they had graduation ceremony at each school. I don't think all these ceremonies were necessary when they weren't really moving on to kindergarten (for instances the 3 yr. class that is just moving on to the 4 yr. old class)? What the.....?

This is my sons experience;
2 yr. old class- graduation at first school (montessori)
3 yr. old grad at a regular preschool
Another 3yr old class at a new preschool, I had him repeat the 3 yr old class, bc of birthday (early Sept) & I started him early not realizing there was a Sept 1 cut off date) A graduation for this class? WHy?
5 yr. old preK class, Graduation- I agree with this one bc preschool ends & kindergarten is a milestone.

Now a kindergarten graduation but they're just moving on to 1st grade in the same school.

Is it just me or all these graduations ridiculous. They play the march song every time too. I could see maybe an end of the year program but a graduation with caps, gowns & march song? Seems excessive to me.

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L.A.

answers from Austin on

I think graduation ceremonies for anything other than High School and college are not necessary. They take away from real accomplishments.

Award ceremonies and parties to say good by to teachers and classmates.. for these other end of the year celebrations makes more sense.

Don't get me wrong, I love celebrating, but to me, these just are not as accomplished as graduating from all 12 years of education or working so hard for 4 years of college.

12 moms found this helpful

J.G.

answers from St. Louis on

I think any graduation other than high school, and higher education are beyond unnecessary.

If you are not being handed a piece of paper that would be of interest to an employer you are not graduating.

8 moms found this helpful

E.S.

answers from Asheville on

I'm a teacher and I think it's ridiculous! Kindergarden, yes, Moving on to high school, yes, leaving high school, yes, leaving college, yes. That is PLENTY! I also don't understand the whole eighth grade 'prom'! Prom is a high school thing, and way too expensive to do twice the way it is being done these days!
Why are we letting kids do things earlier and earlier. If they don't have to wait to do anything, what makes that thing special?
It used to be that you could drive at 16, prom at senior year unless an upper classman invites you, drink at 21(if you choose), etc.
Kids are dressing sleezy and too grown up, girls wearing make up and heels in kindergarden, dating in elementary school. It's just getting completely insane. If you let kids do everything when they are supposed to be little, what will they find to look forward to (or do) when they are older. Drugs? Promiscuity? Already happening. What's next?

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K.B.

answers from Tulsa on

Ridiculous and diminishes the real graduation. Plus a lot of extra work for nothing.

8 moms found this helpful

L.F.

answers from Dallas on

i agree with you. I never understood the purpose of any graduation other than high school and college.

6 moms found this helpful

J.S.

answers from Hartford on

Actual accomplishments we celebrate:
Religious milestones such as first communion, confirmation
Graduation from high school, college
Bridging over in Girl Scouts WITH their troops

The numerous "graduations" and surrounding celebrations really diminish the actual graduations, especially considering the fact that it's a normal expectation (and not a huge accomplishment) to go to and finish preschool, kindergarten, 5th grade, and 8th grade.

Children should be motivated all year to accomplish these things rather than be over-praised and over-rewarded. It's things like this that teach self-entitlement and these kids end up feeling less worth with lower self-esteem as they get older.

I'm all for low-key "rewards" like taking the child out for ice cream or choosing lunch or even picking out an inexpensive toy or something. But these things are really common expectations that aren't huge accomplishments for most typical children. Giving extreme celebratory praise for something that should be expected behavior and follow-through is just ridiculous to me.

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T.N.

answers from Albany on

Well, yes, there is such a thing as TOO MUCH Pomp And Circumstance.

:(

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T.H.

answers from Kansas City on

Agreed! I actually thought I was the only one who thought this...so many people think it's so cute and put so much effort into it...uh no thanks, I'd rather wait til high school! I even think 8th grade grad is silly, except I guess I cut a little more slack for kids that stay in the same school K-8th, that is kind of a bigger deal to be finally moving on! ;)

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M.R.

answers from Chicago on

YES!!!!!!!!

A million flowers for posting this. I had thought about it but I was too chicken because I thought the moms of preschoolers and kindergartners would rise up and give me the business!

What has a preschooler or kindergartner accomplished other than making it through the year that is of such a significant purpose that we need to have outfits, a ceremony, cake, a party, and presents? We teach them early on that they get rewarded for 'showing up'.

6 moms found this helpful

A.M.

answers from Kansas City on

I agree...my thing is when they actually graduate high school is it going to even mean anything to them?????

Today however is Kindergarten Recognition Day...they are acting out the Grouchy Lady Bug...and having snacks...this I can agree with but to hold a graduation ceremony at the K level is just too much. but I would go and be there for her whatever they call it.

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D.H.

answers from Louisville on

They had a "graduation" thing for my granddaughter's kindergarten classes.. It was cute - not the cap and gown thing, tho - it was a hoe-down theme and each class had matching shirts, bandanas, and cowboys hats (art teacher did that). The music teacher worked w/the kids on a couple of little songs - one was a modified version of Achy-Breaky! (imagine almost 90 kids singing!) Then the kids went to their classrooms. (No march song - but each child was introduced to the audience before the singing.)

This was her teacher's first year and she took all the pics over the year and made a slideshow (and made a copy for each child to take home along w/a bucketful of small books and toys - think she was already missing her first kids!)

Yes it was during the day - late afternoon - and I took half-day off work to be there. She was so thrilled to see me there that it was all worth it! The hugs she gave me made it great!

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S.O.

answers from San Antonio on

I agree.
We have become a society where everyone wants congratulated for every thing. Very sad!
Should we throw ourselves a party every time we complete a successful day's work or school?

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J.C.

answers from Anchorage on

If it makes the kids happy and proud, who cares if it is over the top?

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J.L.

answers from Chicago on

I think all those graduations are stupid and unneccessary. I appreciate HS, College grad school. That is the real accomplishment...none of the nonsense of preschool, Pre-K, K, 8th grade. Send me the high school announements and college and even the party invite...I'll be there..

Please hold the announcements/parties on any of the others.

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K.P.

answers from New York on

Yes, I think it's a little overdone.

A "moving up" program from preschool into Kindergarten, again into middle school and again into HS is fine, but "Graduation" is really about completing highschool or college, not about moving between levels.

Somehow it has become the "norm" to have mini-graduations between developmental levels. It's nice to acknowledge it, but I know people who throw full-blown parties for their kids after 5th grade. Really? High school and college, of course but the mini milestones in between are not "party worthy".

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C.J.

answers from Milwaukee on

Sweeet! I thought I was THE ONLY ONE that thought this.

It's like how Kohl's has 'sales' all the time. Takes the REAL meaning away and just waters everything else down.

The little kids have NO IDEA what any of that stuff means anyway.

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S.W.

answers from Amarillo on

Back in the days of the covered wagon there were only two graduations one from 8th and the other from high school. If you were academically inclined you went on to college and got a degree that was worth something and got a good paying job or career. Everybody celebrated that they "had" completed all the required courses and went on their way for the future as adults. We did seem to know what we wanted to do back then much more than the kids do now.

Fast forward to the new world everybody has to celebrate everything and it now cheapens the meaning of accomplishment. Everybody feel entitled to get this that or the other thing without having put in the effort. Sorry so many think it is "cute" to do this every year. I like the mom who said her child wanted to be with her and not on the stage and cried.

It is more for the adults than the child. I will get off my soapbox now.

The other S.

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L.B.

answers from Biloxi on

One of my favorite pictures of my son was when he was 4 years old at his pre-school graduation. Since this was a stand alone school, they were leaving it to move onto various district schools.

Anyhoo, he is standing in his cap and gown, looking adorable, and miserable. He cried through the entire ceremony because he wanted to sit with me and watch, not be on stage.

I did get a lovely one of him and his teacher afterwards. :)

But, to do this every year, would have been cost prohibitive for me, and, I think, down graded the specialness of a graduation for the children and these ceremonies traditionally mark larger milestones in education.

His second, and next graduation, will be in three years when he graduates from High School. I expect to be the one crying in all of those pictures. (and fainting from relief)

God Bless

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B.C.

answers from Norfolk on

It can seem to be a bit overboard sometimes,
but who doesn't want to throw some kind of a party when a school year ends?
The teachers are just as thrilled (if not more so) than the kids and
it's kind of a kick off for the summer.
I just go with it and take lot's of pictures.

3 moms found this helpful

T.S.

answers from San Francisco on

Ditto to everything Laurie A said!

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K.B.

answers from Milwaukee on

Big graduations that we plan on celebrating...

Graduating from grade school and confirmation
Graduating from high school
Graduating from college

My daughter is going into kindergarten and her preschool has a year end program (kids sing a few cute songs & simple play or 2) and they get a piece of paper saying they made it through the year. Then we have a socail time afterwards where everyone brings a snack/dessert to share (this year sundaes, yum). The kids get to play for 30 or so mins while the parents talk... Nothing more.

To me everything else is over the top. In my family you HAVE to go to school, we do not celebrate every year beyond going out for ice cream with the grandparents, and you do not get rewarded for grades or going to school you do it because it is a must.

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C.D.

answers from Columbia on

I tend to think that a class party or something like that is more appropriate than a graduation. It's okay when they are moving up, but for every age. grade? No way. I think when you have had 4 or 5 "graduations" already, your high school graduation, which in my opinion is a right of passage you have earned, doesn't hold the same meaning.
That's like having formal dances by 5th grade. By the time you have been to 4 or 5 of them, prom isn't as special.
I think we need to hold off on some things to give them something to work for and look forward to.

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D.D.

answers from Chicago on

I'm going to have to disagree with some mom's on this. This was my daughter's 1st year of preschool. It was a HUGE step for her. So for her to graduate from there was a big accomplishment and to have a little 10 minute ceremony was big for her. So I think it was good to have a preschool graduation. I, like some other moms, did not start putting my child in preschool at the age of 2 or 3 so this was completely new to her and a big step. Plus, she won't be in that school next year.
I also think its great that there is a graduation ceremony for my 8th grader (and I plan on having a party for her) because her going into high school I think is a big step for her as well.
I love to celebrate my children's accomplishments. We don't get to do it very often, so why not take a couple of milestones like these to do it?

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M.D.

answers from Washington DC on

The kids love them and it's a short amount of time out of our days to support our kiddo's. I love going to the graduations and making my kids feel extra special :).

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J.B.

answers from Boston on

Whatever - it's more for the teachers than anything else. Nothing to get your panties in a twist over. Let them have their little moment, take a couple of pictures and move on. The various pre-schools probably do it this way because the kids don't stay together year after year. It's supposed to be cute and fun - why all the negativity? It's not like you have to throw a party or anything. My boys used to go to a daycare that did a very nice pre-school graduation for the kids going to kindergarten. Most of those kids were there from birth though, so there was no need to mark the end of the previous years. They had caps and gowns and did a little skit and sang some songs and it was lovely. The place closed before my youngest "graduated" and I don't think his pre-school or daycare do anything like this and it's kind of a bummer. It was nice to have a little party at the school and spend some time with the teachers and other parents.

It is a little unnecessary to do these things at ages 2 and 3, but nothing to get fired up over. The teachers and kids are doing all of the work, you just get to show up and smile and take pictures.

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S.J.

answers from St. Louis on

I don't understand why so many moms are so against a little celebration? The more celebrated my children are for the work they do, the more they want to please those same adults that praised them.

There is a huge difference between spoiling and appropriate praise or recognition.

What is the harm done? A little inconvenience of your time and some super cute pictures to look at when the kids are older?

I don't know one four year old who sits and thinks....man, now all I have to do is show up for work and I will get a raise! To them it is a little party with their friends and a chance to tell everyone what they want to be when they are older.

I also don't know any 4 or 5 year olds who would expect a graduation if they got one the previous year. Think back when you were little. I barely remember my kindergarten graduation. But I bet my mom does. And the pics - so cute!

I have so much more stuff to worry about than this.....

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B.S.

answers from Lansing on

Well for you J.J. that does seem extreme.

But aside from that, I do not think Kindergarten or Preschool, 5th grade, or 8th grade graduations are ridiculous. I think anything encouraging kids to succeed in school is a great and positive thing.

My daughter had a preschool graduation, she is not having a Kindergarten one...being its the same school. She was very proud on accomplishing her first year of school as I was of her. (How is that bad?) And FYI, although I admit I bought my daughter a book for her preschool grad party. I did not throw her a preschool graduation bash....so not sure where the "big expense" comes from.

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K.N.

answers from Boston on

The pre-school my daughters attended handles this well, I think. NO use of the word "graduation;" NO cap and gown. Instead, they call it a "moving on" ceremony. The school gives each student a t-shirt with the school logo (intentionally oversized so one size "fits" all). The kids sing a couple of songs that they've worked on and get a little certificate and a hug from the teachers. It's held in their classroom -- no auditorium or anything. Parents stand at the back of the room (seriously -- it's 20 minutes, max). I thought it was a great way to mark the end of the year, recognize that the kids really progressed and yet keep the pressure off - no "pomp & circumstance" in either behavior or the song itself!

Then again, I shouldn't have been surprised. The director, who had been doing this for over 20 years, also handles Halloween in a low-key way. Kids don't bring or wear costumes to school. For the couple of weeks before, they work on some art project that becomes a costume (one year it was a "Mr. Potato Head" made out of a sheet of brown kraft paper tied around their neck with a piece of yarn). Her point was to mark the event & celebrate it appropriately -- APPROPRIATELY being key!

My youngest two are in their late teens now (one just finished her first year of college). Those "moving on" t-shirts meant a ton to them then and they kept them for years. No need for "graduation" for little ones! Really!

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P.K.

answers from New York on

It is excessive. I want to know what is left. High school graduation will be
meaningless to them. When I graduated, getting a cap and gown was a
big thing. We earned it. Not any more. It is ridiculous.

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M.M.

answers from Detroit on

I AGREE 100%. My daughter just had a Kindergarten Graduation. I thought it was ridiculous, but we were there & I brought flowers for my graduate. Ridiculous right?!?!? It's too much!!!

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S.B.

answers from Houston on

I'm relieved to know that I'm not the only one who thinks this way! Silly to say the least.

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A.V.

answers from Washington DC on

I think a ceremony when they move on is appropriate but for every little thing? That's like a trophy for showing up.

Some schools don't call it graduation, but a promotion ceremony. So, depending on the kid, preschool, kindergarten (unless it's in the same school), elementary, so forth. My SD's elem. school specifically called it a promotion ceremony when she moved to middle school because it wasn't "graduation". That was HS. Which she will do next year. Wow. Where DID the time go?

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L.M.

answers from Dover on

I agree with an end of year celebration/program with graduation at the end of each year with MAYBE a graduation type ceremony at the end of each "step" of their educational careers (preschool, elementary, middle/jr high, and of course highschool and college). I do think more than that is excessive but I also think that the one good thing about them are that is stresses the importance of continuing to advance their education. By having the ceremony it recognizes their hard work and encourages them to continue to/through the next steps. There is so much attention on the bad that is in this world, it is good to celebrate happy times and good behaviors.

I am in a situation w/ my daughter (4.5) who is about to graduate preschool and is very ready for kindergarten but due to a December birthday can not start school. The director and teacher at the school can not believe they won't let her start. Their program is great but they have told me she will be extremely bored to repeat it next year. She is graduating with 26 other kids. I think 23 or 24 of them are moving to kindergarten while the other three (including her) are moving on to other programs because of their birthdays. I have had to look for a private pre-k program that will allow her to work at a k level because that is where she is. So, there is a chance she will have a pre-k graduation (not sure what the new school will do) when she is moving on to her regular/public school. Technically both are "preschool" but one is a daycare/preschool while the other is pre-k program at a private school.

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D.S.

answers from Allentown on

Hi, J.:
Did you ask your son how he felt about it?

Did you ask other children in the class how they felt about graduation?

Just want to know.
D.

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S.K.

answers from Dallas on

It is excessive but I don't mind if it doesn't cost me an arm and a leg. I heard recently about a preschool graduation and the parents were asked to fork over $50 for the caps, gowns and whatever else. Now that's over the top!! They weren't going to go because they thought that was ridiculous. They have the money. They just think that's way too much for something that will be worn one time and thrown away. Our son wore a paper cap and his preschool tshirt. He looked adorable!

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D.K.

answers from Pittsburgh on

I think it's silly. And at our Montessori, they hold these things in the middle of the day so it's ridiculous for working parents (first they have to come and second there is no childcare for the rest of the day). We graduated from elementary school (6th grade), Jr High (9th grade), high school and college. They were all held on a weekend. Do they actually make caps and gowns in preschool size?

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K.M.

answers from Denver on

My children both attended a private daycare from less than a year of age until they were about 3 and 1/2. At that school leaving there for kindergarten is big dealed. it is associated with a small university with lots of money so when they "graduate" the kids get diploma covers like you would normally get when you graduate from college, they march in to "Pomp and Circumstance" and they have a little speech from someone. The month prior they have graduation pictures taken in the caps and gowns they will wear and parents buy pictures and as far as I know, announcements. My kids both left that school before the year before kindergarten as there is a pre-K program at our local public school that we like a lot. It does seem excessive. I always thought graduation was supposed to symbolize the completion of a major accomplishment that not everyone gets completed. You have a problem if you cannot be passed on to kindergarten

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D.B.

answers from Charlotte on

.

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P.R.

answers from Cleveland on

Yes!!! It's like trophys for every single person on every single team. It's all gotten way overdone. I corrected my daughter yesterday when she said she was graduating 1st grade soon.

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K.W.

answers from Seattle on

Graduation ceremonies with a march, cap, and gown certainly seem excessive for preschoolers. However, some recognition/ceremony for kids moving up a class seems reasonable. I think it's helpful for the kiddos who are moving up to understand there is going to be a change and get excited about it. Transitions are really hard for some of the littles, and if a ceremony can help ease the transition, I'm all for it.

At my daughter's preschool, they have a ceremony when the 4 yos move up to the 5yo class. The ceremony involves a potluck and the kiddos getting a certificate. This level of recognition seems completely appropriate.

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K.U.

answers from Detroit on

We have pictures of my younger brother "graduating" from preschool back in 1979...they made the hats out of paper and cardboard as a craft project and got little fake rolled-up diplomas and it was all very cute without any real hoopla involved. That being said, I think it's over the top to be celebrating a "graduation" that is really just moving on to the next grade, and therefore is what everyone is expected to do. Especially when it involves buying the kid some expensive gift as well. Maybe do something special, like go out to lunch or something small like that, but that's it. Of course, my daughter will be in kindergarten in 2 years and I'll probably feel forced to get her flowers or something just because everyone else will and she'll wonder why she's being left out.

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J.S.

answers from Pittsburgh on

I agree 100%!!! Ironically, my DD "graduated" from her 2 year old program yesterday (which is at our gym), and will be moving onto preschool at another location next year. The graduation was cute and all, but I think ridiculous. I've always thought graduation should be reserved for high school and college. That marks the end of an important event and true achievement. Graduating from middle school? Whoopie. It is expected. I think all the excessive graduations take away from the truly important ones.

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