Does Your Child's School Publish a Directory, with Parent Names, Emails, Etc?

Updated on April 11, 2013
T.S. asks from Orinda, CA
33 answers

I am often surprised at the number of parents on this site who don't have access to the emails, phone numbers and addresses of their kids' classmates. All three of our schools (elementary, middle and high) publish a parent directory every year with all of this information. Families CAN OPT OUT if they want, and not have their information shared publicly, but I would say maybe only 2% do. Everyone else is fully listed, including step parents and cell phone numbers.
I can't imagine NOT having this information! I can't imagine how parents set up play dates (with kids who don't live nearby) and send invites or evites to birthday parties. Sure, at some point kids are old enough to exchange phone numbers and call each other up but when you need to figure out a specific day to play and who's going to pick up, drop off, what time, etc. the parents really need to communicate with each other. I would imagine this is especially important for working parents.
So, do your schools do this?
Oh, and I should mention there is a small cost. Directories are "free" to Parent's Club members, but it costs $25 to join Parent's Club. Totally worth it in my opinion, like I said, I couldn't imagine not having it.
EDIT: jessica wessica technically the school doesn't do it, the parents club does, and there are no privacy concerns because parents only share the information if they WANT to

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So What Happened?

Thanks for all the feedback! Hell on Heels that made me laugh because yes, that's EXACTLY why we pay the big bucks to live here!
I'm glad to see that most of you have and/or support the directory idea. I feel like parent/child/school communication is so important. It's even come in handy in middle and high school because sometimes one of my kids get stuck on an assignment and it's nice for them to be able to look up someone from one of their classes, someone they're not necessarily friends with (and therefore don't have their number.) It's too bad some of you have been victims of mass mailings this way. I can honestly say after being part of this school system for 13 years that has never happened to me.
And Riley J, your point is well taken and this is why participation should always be optional.
As for those who find it invasive of otherwise dangerous, I don't really get that. I'm not talking about birthdates and social security numbers I am simply talking about a convenient way for families to connect.

Featured Answers

J.S.

answers from Hartford on

Not around here. It's a violation of student privacy and student rights. If parents or the children want to arrange outside activities then they're expected to go to the effort of doing it the old fashioned way. The school is not expected to facilitate that process, and they shouldn't be.

The teachers always have access to the parent information, and parents always have access to the teacher information. But parents never have access to other parent information unless they have, you know, a phone book or know how to look people up on AnyWho.com.

2 moms found this helpful

S.G.

answers from Grand Forks on

We have a school directory that includes childrens names, phone numbers and email addresses, and it is organized by grade and classroom. Parents can choose whether or not their child is to be included in the directory. Most kids choose to be included. It is provided to all students for free. It is handy to have.

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M.E.

answers from Chicago on

My daughter's school has one that is useless. The directory does not list the names of the students. It has an alpha listing of families, and shows the grades/teachers of the students in each of the families. At least half the school does not participate, so it usually goes in the trash. I don't know why they bother with it.

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D.C.

answers from Pittsburgh on

Our PTA publishes one. Parents opt-in to have their info included, and almost everyone does it because, as you said, otherwise your child isn't going to be invited to birthday parties (our school won't distribute any invitations, so they are all mailed). And every PTA member gets one, and it's $5 to joing the PTA.

5 moms found this helpful

A.G.

answers from Dallas on

Yes. Our PTA publishes it. It's free for PTA members, and there is a small fee for non-members. Parents can opt out if they don't want their information published.

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L.R.

answers from Washington DC on

In a post earlier today about "I got no RSVPs to my child's party invitations which were sent via the kids in class," I mentioned to the person that her school needed a student directory so that in the future she could send invitations to the parents at home and not via kids' backpacks!

We have one. Our PTA does it. It is actually free which is great (especially as we have a big school and it's a thick book so it must cost a bit to produce). But I'd be very willing to pay for it. I sure hope we get something like it next year in middle school, or at least a class list. Hugely helpful, especially as kids get older and do collaborative work with kids not in their class: My daughter is in a science program where she has partners from other classes in her grade, and the directory is a godsend for getting in touch with other families I don't know so we can schedule rides, meetings, etc.! Ours has student name, parents' names, siblings who attend the same school (cross-referenced), address, phone numbers and e-mails.

I was appalled to see that one parent here said she had stopped being in it because she was bombarded with ads and e-mails etc. from vendors as a result of being listed -- that stinks. Our directory is not distributed anywhere outside the school families. Of course, a vendor or business could easily get hold of one if they had relatives with kids at our school, I guess, but I've never had or even heard of this issue with our directory. I'm so sorry that happened in her case. If anyone's starting a new directory project for their school, I'd recommend that their forms include a very stiff warning about not giving it out and not giving it to any businesses.....

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S.H.

answers from Honolulu on

At my kids' school-- A classroom Teacher, MAY do this, for HER classroom/parents etc.
BUT... the directory only lists your information, IF YOU WANT TO. If you decline to be included in the directory, then you will not be listed.
This is per privacy etc. for you and your child.
But my kids' school, does NOT make nor publish a directory of ALL the kids/parents contact info of the entire school..
Again, this is per privacy.

I personally, opt out.
I, only give my info to parents/moms, that *I* want to.
At my, discretion.

OR, some classroom Teacher, have their own classroom website... in which they may put contact info for other parents/kids, IF they want to be listed there.

And in any event, a parent CAN simply, contact the Teacher, for any information they may need about the class etc. or simply call the Teacher.

There is no parent club, at my kids' school.

Personally, I find these directories a bit, invasive.
I see no reason why all the parents names and the child's full names and contact info. has to be given out, anyway.
It is privacy. And protecting one's privacy.
And NO way, should there be "addresses" and all that info, for everyone to have.
Talk about identity theft and weirdo parents/families having all your contact info? No way.
I do not believe, that parents should have access, to all this information.

If I want to contact a classmate's parent of my own child... I simply send a note to school with my child, in a sealed envelope... on which I write "For Billy's Mom, From: Johnny's Mom" and I put the Room Number/teacher's Name on it, and then have my child give it to the Teacher when he gets to school. Then the TEACHER of the class, gives it to the child in their mailbox in class. And then, the parent can contact me or per whatever I wrote on that note. For her.
I have never, had a problem contacting any parent.

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R.J.

answers from Seattle on

Our school does.

I'm in the 2% since I have stalker issues.

Except our school has over 500 kids, but only about 150 names in the directory.

The school is not careful with private information (even when they have restraining orders & orders of protection on file, much less law enforcement / CEOs / etc. who need to keep their numbers/addresses off of search engines). So anyone who doesn't want to be found with a google search (including kids names/ages/photos) opts out.

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C.O.

answers from Washington DC on

Mamazita:

Yep. Our schools publish directories. However, people can choose not to have their information included.

We get the directories. I store them. I throw them out at the beginning of the school year....

I don't get it either. Class lists are important for a variety of reasons!

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C.C.

answers from San Francisco on

Aaaaand that's why you pay the big bucks to live in Orinda! Your schools actually have their acts together. Our district is a big, urban district, and our school has 1000+ kids on 4 different year-round tracks (grades K-6). There's no directory. It's a real pain in the neck. We came from a small, private school previously, and they did publish a directory. It was so handy. As it stands at my daughters' school, if you want to send out an evite for your child's birthday, you have to get the list from the teacher, pretty much. :(

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K.M.

answers from Kansas City on

Ours is online and parents can opt out.

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L.A.

answers from Austin on

Yes, Our PTA's puts it together..
It is a lot of work.. If you are a member of the PTA it is free. If you are not a member it is $10.00 This is a great way to get members to join..

We included students name, parents, home address, email and phone numbers.

In the elementary it is also cross referenced and also done by Teachers homerooms.

They do a great job..They are time consuming and can be expensive since we have to send it out to be printed.

But we do have to have permission from the parents to place their info in there. Then if a child has multiple households all of that has to be checked and permission from them also.

The problem is that once kids get to middle school and High School, less parents send in their information and permission.. We think it is mainly because the kids do not give their parents the forms..

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K.C.

answers from Denver on

Yes, we have a school directory. Every school my kids have ever attended have had a school directory, seven different schools, all with directories.

Our elem. current directory is listed by teacher's class, complete with emails, alternate addresses, etc. Then in the back, every child is listed alphabetically with just their emails listed for quick access. Also listed: HSA (Home and School Association, run by parents, kinda like the PTA, but with lots and lots of power) officers and their info, teachers and their email addresses, and zip codes that are a part of our school district and other helpful tidbits of info.

Our middle school directory has the kids listed alphabetically by grade, then at the back of the book again with the email addresses. High school book is also extremely efficiently organized.

Parents have the option of NOT being in the directory, but there are very few who choose that. The HSA puts it together every year and it costs $10 per book. Can't imagine not having a school directory.

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B.F.

answers from Austin on

Our school does have it and I love having it. Our son is in elementary school so its very helpful. Even if he was older and can get his friends contacts on his own( and he comes home with phone numbers in his backpack all the time ), I'd still like to have the parents info. if I needed it. :)

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M.K.

answers from Columbus on

Our elementary school did this and I always had mixed feelings about it because they gave the information to every parent in the whole school. I would have preferred they just give it to my kids' own class/grade. But they never listed my email or cell phone number so I dealt with it.

Our high school doesn't do it but I would be very upset if they did! Our church does it and I had no idea they were going to do it. But as long as they only put what's available in the regular phone book, I'm ok with it. If they published my email or cell phone number, then I'd be really pissed!!!

I guess I just feel a lot differently now that my kids are older. I've gotten a lot more private.

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M.P.

answers from Portland on

Yes, our PTA publishes one. I don't think one has to be a PTA member to receive one. A few years ago, it was included in the orientation packet. I think one has to ask for it now.

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J.B.

answers from Boston on

Our schools do class lists. The teacher cannot coordinate this but can suggest that if a parent wants to own this, it's OK. So at back to school night someone will pass around a sheet that people put their info on, or the teacher will e-mail all of the parents and say "if you want to be on the class list then e-mail [so-and-so]" and then the coordinating parent distributes a copy to everyone.

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S.H.

answers from Salinas on

Yes! phone number, mailing address and email. I filled it out when i enrolled my son (public school, not private). Some have blank or P.O. box for address some left off email. The current one i got is free at my school (if i paid i forgot), another school nearby has a fundraiser and you can purchase a directory.

If the child has non-married parents their info will be listed separate under the child's name. This part is nice so you do not assume the mother's last name is the same as the child.

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K.M.

answers from Chicago on

No, we do not. It was difficult to even get the actual email addresses of the teaching staff, my son's teacher forwarded the list to me since the office would not and I am ON the PTO! We have a fairly small school less than 500 students. The PTO is a disaster and I do not see it being organized anytime in the future very few of our events are a success and that partly falls on us and partly on the school.

In the past the parents have put notes in the kid's backpacks and the exchange was made.
So I would put an envelope that said: "To Charlie B's Parents" the teachers happily put it into Charlie B's packpack and the exchange of information was done.

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A.B.

answers from San Francisco on

My son's preschool doesn't do it. I wish they would. I work full-time and my husband does the drop off and my MIL or him usually does the pick-up. I've been there only about 3 times in 2 years. So, I can't just get to know the kids or parents. I've never scheduled a play date with any of the kids (except 1 we already knew). My son's an only child and would love it if I did. Once my husband told me, so-and-so's mom would like to do a play date with Adler (my son). Too bad I don't know how to contact her. I could figure it out but it's a hassel.

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A.V.

answers from Washington DC on

Yes, and you can opt out. I was given a list for DD's preschool and I know there's a directory at least through MS. However, it didn't list absolutely everyone/everything. You still sometimes had to guess and sometimes it was interesting when the names didn't match or your kid didn't know how to spell the friend's last name (or even know what it was). We used to fold over the corners and highlight the kid's name once we figured it out. We never had problems with junk mail because of it.

I have used our preschool's list all year. It is handy. But I also understand opting out. If there isn't a list, you can sometimes ask a teacher to forward information or you can put invites in backpacks.

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R.R.

answers from Los Angeles on

No directory, the majority of parents feel it's an invasion of privacy so they stopped about 10 years ago they said. :(

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D.N.

answers from Chicago on

No, not even when my older kids went to Catholic school for pre-k to 2nd. My younger daughter's preschool calss at the park dist does not either.

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C.S.

answers from Chicago on

In my dreams only!!!
Our PTO sends out a flyer asking parents to send in theri info to make a directory but, only a few parents from each class actually do it.

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L.M.

answers from Cleveland on

It isn't offered to us and i have not heard of other schools around us doing this.

would be nice but on one hand this forces me to be concious of who i make the effort to contact.

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T.F.

answers from Dallas on

Our schools offer it and you can opt out if you want. There are certain "rules" which say it is not to be used for personal solicitations, mailings, etc.

I personally opted out after the first year because I was bombarded with mailers and emails from realtors, travel agents, investment counselors, etc.

I started replying back to those who contacted me for solicitation asking where they got my name and info (I was fully aware of it) and started my fundraising for the school pitch on them soliciting them to buy advertisement, sponsor the team, etc.

The general idea of having the directory is a good one but some people can't resist sharing the directories and using them for personal gain. I get enough junk email and mail and I like to keep my info more private.

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C.B.

answers from Reno on

Our school does class lists. Emails, addresses, phone numbers. You can put as much or as little as you would like.
It a wonderful thing
Many blessings

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B.K.

answers from Chicago on

Yes our school has that (and my older daughter's school always had it as well). Teachers are included with phone numbers and e-mails. I can't imagine not having it.

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T.S.

answers from San Francisco on

Yes, we do, and I also think it's a good idea.

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K.C.

answers from Los Angeles on

Our school publishes a directory, but participation is optional. I was really disappointed by how many parents didn't include their info, since it does make it very hard to contact them. I would say probably 30-40% of my son's class opted out on at least some, if not all, of the info (address, phone, email).

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B.E.

answers from New York on

Our school releases a list, but you have to Opt In to it. I filled out a form at the beginning of the school year.

Unfortunately, they didn't release the list until mid-December this year, so I had the list too late for my son's birthday party. Better luck next year, I guess.

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S.T.

answers from New York on

Our PTA's do it - and of course with confidentiality laws anyone can opt out. In elementary school it was given to every kid whether or not you were in the PTA. I'm not a PTA mom - I personally am not someone who wants to decide stuff by committee and then have all my family's social life revolve around the school. For many years I paid the PTA dues but was never able to attend a meeting anyway (they were always held either in the mornings or on Weds nites which is family night at our church - a bigger priority).

In Middle & High school the directories are only given to PTA members and that's fine with me - since kids at these ages develop their own friends and exchange cell phone numbers. I get to know the friend's parents thru drop-offs, pick-up, car pooling, etc. When there's an invite my kid has to get me the mom's phone number of the other kid. We work it out.

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K.A.

answers from Phoenix on

Our school doesn't but I sure wish they did. There are a few parents I'd love to call, so our kids can play together (we don't live right where the school is, we live about 2 miles away) and I'd love to arrange a time for them to play on the weekends, but I can't, unless I happen to see or meet them at a school function since I work full time.

I'm not that surprised that is not offered, though, our district is very blue collar, the school is Title 1, and her teacher this year doesn't want anyone having her cell phone # to contact her, which makes email the only option. I have started to become somewhat unhappy with the school and how things are run. Getting ANY info is like pulling teeth.

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