Getting Rid of the Binky and Sleeping Issues

wow K. you've had a tough run. i know how hard it is for teenagers and older children to get over mono - talking weeks, not days...so i can imagine that in that little body it will take forever. i know you're anxious because of the new arrival (congrats by the way) but my advice to you would be to try to be as patient as you can. if he still "has" mono like you worded it, i would not be worrying about the binky for quite awhile. especially if the baby comes and he's still not feeling well. let him have it until things settle down, at least. i was a thumb sucker, and then as a young adult, a smoker, so i know first hand how hard it is to give up that comfort item. he'll need it yet! good luck and try to give him a break.

First of all I want to congratulate you on the new baby and I know how sleep is important, especially when you are pregnant! Anyway, as to you binky questions...My sister just cut off the tip little by little each night. If you cut off the end it doesn't give the same "sucking" that they like. Her son would tell her it was broke and my sister would say that she couldn't fix it but if he wanted it then he could have it. It was about 3nights worth of crying but he just didn't want it anymore. I also want to state that he only had the binky in bed so if you child has a binky all day then I would start by "weening" him for just having the binky in bed and then slowly not at all. Hope this helps!

My daughters and a good friends daughter has had it. I've seen first hand how big the blisters in their throat can get, how tired they are and how long it takes to even begin to heal let alone feel back to normal.

I believe now is the wrong time to try and get rid of anything that can give him comfort!

I'm so sorry that you are feeling this tired and he is feeling so crappy. My heart feels for you and I don't have ANY idea of how to speed a long the healing.

Suzi

K., I guess it is always easy to give advice, and always harder to follow through..but trust me their is No easy way, it has to be cold turkey...throw all Binkys in the trash. If you are strong and throw them all away you can not be tempted to break down and give in. I am sorry your little one is not well. It never gets any easier. If you wanted to wait until your son was well to make the switch I think anyone with a heart would understand, but I say the sooner the better.
Good luck
Congratulations on your upcoming addition!
B.

K.,

So sorry for the tough times you're having right now. I just went to a talk from a pediatric dentist who suggested cutting off the tip of the pacifier. It loses the "good sensation" they get from it. Some are stubborn and keep sucking, so you gradually continue to keep cutting off the tip - shorter and shorter, till they refuse it. Good luck.

I was rather fortunate that my daughter gave the binky up on her own with the birth of my son, and my son refused to take a binky. I agree with you though, my daughter was crying out because she would lose the binky and I was keeping a binky in every corner of the bed so that if I couldn't find the one she lost, I would just grab from another corner. About 2 months before I had my son, she would have been 16 months old and I told her that I was getting her old binkies that she didn't use anymore and getting them cleaned and ready for the new baby. After my son was born and we tried to give the new baby a binky when he would cry, she decided that she was done with them and didn't want them anymore. If that doesn't work for you, I saw on Super Nanny a trick that I was going to try after my daughter turned 2 if she was still stuck on the binky. They told the little girl that there was a "Binky Fairy" and that if the little girl put all of her binkies in a bag and placed them where the fairy could find them, the fairy would leave a special gift in exchange for giving the old binkies to little babies that needed them more than the girl did. It worked for the little girl on the show, but I don't know what else went into it and if she fussed for a bit without it. Good luck!

I want to echo the other posters- this isn't the time to take your son's pacifier away. He's about to get a new sibling (I bet he's be pretty jealous if the baby got a pacifier and he didn't.)

He's also about to gain a sibling, while pretty sick. I bet he's waking up because he feels icky- much like adults do.

I will be pretty honest in saying I think parents give up their right to a good night's sleep when they have kids. I never expected to get a full nights sleep when I had a baby, or when they were toddlers. Waking up 4-5 times a night was par for the course for the first 4 years for us.

When the new baby gets here tell your son that his little sister needs the binky now. And see if he'll give it to her. That's what we did with our son. It worked, the baby would start to cry and he'd give her a passy to make her be quiet. We bought a passy that looked just like his, we didn't use his. His is actually bronzed. And the waking up in the night. Does he sleep in a toddler bed? If he does, move his toddler bed next to your bed, so he feels close to you and is more likely to go right back to sleep.

Hi K., when my paci girl was little we put several pacies in the bed with her. That way if she lost one she could find one of the others and not disturb us. I don't know if your son is still in a crib or not but ours was. When she turned 2 we only allowed her to have the paci at night or during nap. Several months later she could only have it at night. Then several months later we took one out of the dishwasher and it was mildewed and we told her it was yucky and had her throw it away and told her that was the "last" one. It really wasn't but she didn't know that. This took about a year. By the time she was three she was completely weened. Good luck and God Bless.

You poor thing!! I do have an idea that absolutely worked with all 3 of my babies (and currently works with my 11 month old baby girl who loves her binky). Before I tell you, I would like to say that I would not worry about taking it away from him until he is feeling better. Right now, do whatever is going to get you some sleep and peace!! He isn't feeling well and probably still needs to binky for comfort. So, if you do decide to let him have it a little longer, may I suggest the Hungry Pelican. Have you heard of it? It is a bright colorful cotton pelican that hangs in the crib. I put SEVERAL binkies in there at night and when my baby wakes up in the middle of the night, she knows where she can find them.....works like a charm. I can hear her on the monitor waking up and getting one. I am so happy that I found it. Just play with your son with the pelican until he understands that his binkies will always be in there!! I hope this helps. You can find the hungry pelican on any online store like amazon.com....shop around for the best price. GOOD LUCK!!

Hi K.-
With everything that is going on (adding a new sibling to the family) I would probably try to wait. I know I had mine until my brother was born in which case I saw that "babies" used paci's and then I didn't want it anymore (that is what my Mom said). You might wait until then or you could try what I saw on Super Nanny which was to "mail" the paci to a baby who didn't have one. Made the kids feel grown up & I think they got a treat of some sort too. Good luck & best of luck with your baby. It stinks not getting sleep!

WHen our daughter was 6-9mo old she started to wake often during night, when binky fell out of mouth and couldn't find it. I spoke to pediatrician about it during a visit, and he said need to rid binky altogether and she will stop waking up at night crying. He said it would be a miserable 3 nights most for us but then it would be resolved. I think it was only 1-1/2 nights. Basically we had to let her cry herself to sleep. We were to make sure she was safe but let her cry, and not let her see us after we put her down for night, no peeking in. If she woke up during the night, do not pick her up. I think we were to wait a few minutes to see if she would fall back to sleep herself, which she did. It worked great! The hard part was sitting in the other room hearing her cry, but it probably only lasted 20min. first night, 10min or less second night, and no problem 3rd night. (She was young enough she didn't stand in crib yet, so her safety wasn't much of an issue)

the way we got rid of the binky for both of my boys is i cut the tips off. they still had their binkys, so i wasnt taking it away, but i just told them they were broke. my boys both had multiple binkys all over the house, so i did it one at a time so it wasnt drastic. after a whil they lost interest and forgot about them.

I would wait until he feels better, then we cut just the tip off, he still sucked on it, then every other day after that we would cut just a little more. Eventually it gets down to nothing and they can't keep it in their mouth. If you do this gradually it gets them used to not relying on it. After about a week my son took it in and threw it in the trash and never asked for it again. Good luck, hope this helps.

I would first wait till your little guy is feeling better. Make sure to wash it frequently. You can even give him SPECIFIC times to have the bink once he is feeling better to help wean him off the bink. It will be hard once the new baby comes, especailly if the new little angle is a binkie baby. I would at least try to limit his time(about 15 min...when he wakes, after lunch, comfort when falls, naptime, after dinner, bedtime) with the bink and he may then quit on his own. He can have a "special place" put it when he's done and ready for next time. You slowly take away time slots, bedtimes being last to break completely. Good Luck, and congrats on your new little joy!

I would probably wait until he is feeling better to get rid of the binky unless you think it is the only reason he is waking. At 23months he should be able to find it on his own too. Anyways, I agree with the previous suggestion. My siblings and I have all just cut the tip off the binki then the sucking sensation is no longer there. My daughter cried the first couple of sleep sessions but got over it. My nephew was old enough to say "it broken" and threw it away himself. I pray he gets better soon.

Hi K.,
I just went through this with my 26 month old son. He had several binks but one favorite. When the 'yellow' bink had tear in it, I pointed it out and said that Daddy could not fix it and we needed to throw it into the trash. He threw it away himself. (I discreetly got rid of all of the other binks) The first few nights were not easy and he talked about his 'yellow' bink a lot, but by day 3 he was over it. It really has to be cold turkey. Good Luck!

I believe every poster has had the same advice...please wait to get rid of the binky!
It will be hard enough when he is feeling well, let alone when he's ill.
A suggestion might be that when the new baby arrives, he could give his binkies to her. (congratulations, by the way:)
I like the other advice you have gotten...the weening process works. When I weened my son off the binky, I got it down to one binky at night. Then the dishwasher "broke" it. I let him find it in there (of course after I had cut off the tip) and he wanted to fix it...got his little toy tool box and everything. He was surprisingly o.k. with the fact that it was no good any more.
It's funny, now when I say I need to put his sister's binkies in the dishwasher, he remembers what happened to his and says, "NO...don't do it mommy!"
I hope your son feels better soon and good luck with everything!

Good Morning K., Congratulations on your future little princess.
Sometimes Binky's and sleeping go hand in hand. They use them to self sooth. Just like a favorite blankie. Our eldest son told his 3 1/2 yr old he was throwing Woobie away cause he was a big boy now. Well Nana ( me ) stepped in and let him know it had to be Corbin's decision not to sleep with woobie anymore. And that is all he does with Woobie, sleeps with it. I told him I didn't even have to take your bottle away, you decided at 19 mo. you didn't want it anymore and threw it away yourself. Went completely to a cup. You carried your blankie everywhere with you until you were almost 4 then you gave it up on your own. * we still have woobie * ;)

Our 5 Gr children each had something near and dear to them and all at one time or another gave them up willingly. Zane our youngest gave up his Binky and uses his thumb to suck when tired, gave up his bottle and uses a sippy. He turned one in Oct.

Each child is different of course, his Binky may be helping him right now more then you know since he is ill. I have never had Mono, so I don't know all of the symptoms and how it is spread other then the normal stuff, kissing, drinking from same cup etc..

If he seems to only wake up when he is looking for Binky you might try on of the Binky attachments they have. He can find it quicker and go back to sleep sooner.

Just some thoughts, some mama's start by clipping the end off the Binky's, so they aren't as satisfying. Some have giving them to the Binky Angels to send off with a balloon for the new baby's in heaven.

God Bless K., hope you get some great advice from the other mama's out there.
K. Nana of 5

Babies are just like us only smaller- so why not try some kind of "white noise". When my kids were born the nurses pointed out that the nursery is always making noise-talking, machines going, people moving around and we were told then not to be too quiet as this is really not what the baby has had-remember there is a lot of noise before they get here-so I might suggest a radio for night time sleep-it does not need to be loud- just slightly on and to something gentle (skip the ball games and hockey) maybe there is a nice university station that offers some classics and opera-generally that is soothing. Or you might want to try a fan-aim it away from the baby-they make great noise or there are noise machines you can buy for babies-they have lots of sounds that will drown out things and at the same time create a sound that baby finds comforting-this might help. About the binky I wish I had a good idea but the only thing that comes tomind is have a talk even with baby-tell him it is time to be a bigger boy and think about giving up his binky-this might takes several days but making it his choice can be forthcoming for many decisions in his life later-tell him he is a big boy and remind him big boys can give mom his binky to hold forever. It is worth a try. Praise him and if he wants to see it put it in a special place and tell him it is clean and needs to stay clean( in that place) like a plastic box where only you can get it out. Remember he is old enough to climb up to get it. A drawer where he knows and yet can't go without you is a good idea. Good luck.