Going into Labor - Fort Worth,TX

Everyone is different. With my first I started dialating at about 36 weeks at 1 cm/week. Finally, at 39 weeks and 6 cm dialated, and even though I had contractions, my dr induced labor!! My younger one was earlier, but my dr induced at 38 weeks and 5 cm dialated (he was afraid to send me home at that point w/my 2nd). Don't worry, it will happen when it happens!! Congrats!!

Hi H.,
First, congratulations and Good Luck, everything is going to be just fine! My water didn't break with either one of my boys until I was Dialated to an 8 and effaced 80%. Everyone is SO different, just relax and enjoy the moment that God has blessed you with!

Get ready for the big trip... don't forget to pack a pair of socks or slippers, deodorant, toothbrush/toothpaste, hairbrush, extra panties (you might/will probably bleed through pads) comfy cloths for the ride home, a list of phone numbers to call with good news, an outfit for your baby to wear for his first picture (they will let you change the baby) and for the ride home, nipple cream and nursing pads (if you will be nursing), baby book to capture feet prints, camera (extra batteries/memory/film) ink pen for capturing special memories and recording the feeding schedule, and the car seat!

Don’t be nervous, relax and let the doctors and nurses guide you through your breathing and contractions. The contractions (labor) were tougher than the actual delivery for me and I delivered without the epidural either time(couldn’t get it through my spine) and ALL of the pain melted away when I was able to see and hold my miracles.

It will be the most incredible, spiritual, emotional, and exciting day of your life! I had no idea that my heart could instantly feel like I had a whole new perspective and capacity for love!

You will do great, let us know when you are home!

E.
PS. Please don’t even attempt to be modest at the hospital, remember, these people deliver babies everyday and don’t care if your toenails are painted or you accidentally have a bowel movement while pushing!

Hi H.,

Did you take any childbirth classes? If you didn't you might be able to find Laugh & Learn about Childbirth (http://www.amazon.com/Laugh-Learn-About-Childbirth-Lamaze...) at Blockbuster. It is a DVD version of a childbirth class, and I have to say I learned ALOT watching this. I am expecting my 3rd child in early February and I still learned alot about what happens to my body during the 3 stages of labor. I would highly recommend it and I think it would help you prepare and understand what is coming. Knowing what is happening with your body will empower you and let you be more in control during your delivery.

My heart goes out to you ... I had my daughter at 18 too and can relate to the issues you are facing.

Good Luck to you and stay strong!!
T.
www.TFJPhotography.com/blog

Congrats on your upcoming arival. This is a very excitinng a nervous time. Just remember that not all pregancies or deliveries are the same. With my first pregnancy, I was 1 cm when the doctor checked me that morning. Around 5p I went to the restroom and noticed a little blood. As the evening progressed I kept feeling like my bladder was dripping. I put a pad on and would go to the restroom frequently. Around 11p I finally called the doctor and went to the hospital. He said that my water had broken and I was at 2 cm. I never felt a big gush of water just a little drip. Since I was not going fast, they gave me patosin to speed up the dialation. I got my epidural about 2 hours later and she was born right before 12n the next day. With my second pregnancy, I had been shopping all day and feeling fine. Just had a small discomfort in my back (like I always did). I was carring twins. My doctor checked me and I was dialated to 5 cm and was 90% effaced. I had no contractions to my knowledge, so he admitted me to the hospital that night to observe me. The next morning at 7a I was 6 cm and 100% effaced. My daughter was sideways and my son was breech, so we decided to do a c-section. They were born at 830 and 835am. I never felt a contraction and my water never broke with the twins.
Try to relax as much as you can. You will not get a lot of rest after the baby arrives, for a while. Also, ask your doctor or his nurse any and all questions you have until you understand the answer. I will pray that your baby arrives quickly and healthy.

Basically, your body is getting ready which is what the softening etc. is all about. Your doctor should be willing to explain it to you until you understand. Not everyones water breaks and not everyone has contractions. Dont hesitate to call the doctor if you have questions about how your body is feeling.... that is what they are there for. Meanwhile, try to get as much rest as you can (I know its hard to sleep with the baby belly.) You will need your energy for the delivery. Having your baby is a REALLY neat experience and it will be here before you know it. Good luck and God bless.
T.

What to Expect when you are Expecting is a great book... you're kind of at the end of the pregnancy but could always read online about dilating,etc. Get a copy of What to Expect the first year also... it will help a little bit with the baby at certain ages. First ones are always scary! I remember the first day my son would NOT stop crying... oh my gosh it was awful and such a challenge. I felt so bad just putting him in his crib after trying everything and walking to my patio to take a breather... went in after about 5 min and was much calmer and not so stressed and he finally calmed down. there have been many more days/nights like that and he's two now! :0) you'll get the hang of it on your own! but never be ashamed to ask for your mom to help! if you have any questions about the birth or pregnancy ask your dr... no question is a stupid one! you should be as comfortable with decisions going on in delivery as possible! :) best of luck to you!

Darling,

Babies come when they are ready to come. Many women dilated a few centimeters and stay that way for awhile. Doctors can only go on the info from you last period as to a due date---that is rarely accurate. Walk--that will help with moving the baby down and in position, which it should be in by now. My daughter had a similar experience to you and all went well (first baby at 18 and unmarried)..she now has 2 girls and a step-son. Stay calm--remember some labor starts in the lower back--not in the front always--little water leaks can be an indication--not everyone "breaks" the water in one big gush--some have their water broken at the hospital--you should be going to the doctor weekly at this point--they will keep you abreast as to the dilation--the cervic softens to allow opening and flexiblility of the birth canal.Congratulations!

Me--Mom of 2, Nana of 3!

For my 2nd son, I was told the same thing 3 weeks before my due date. Since my 1st son came 2 weeks early, I was SURE it would be the same. But, no labor or contractions came. When my due date came and nothing was changed, he offered to induce and I said "yes"...to each his own though. It allowed us to 'plan' for what to do w/my older son and an exact time to go to the hospital. (By the way, I hadn't been dilated or effaced at all 1 1/2 days prior to my FIRST son's unexpected labor that came 2 weeks early...my doctor was shocked and didn't expect it.) The body is a mystery. Good luck & try to get rest - don't overdo things & wear out when the baby is a couple of months old. (It's easy to try to be Supermom when you're young and excited!)

Your doctor is unspeakably cruel. :) To tell you any day now... hmph. I was three cm for 2 and a half months (my 7 month checkup) - they were worried in the beginning, but at 38 weeks said go ahead - walk, etc. 39, 40, 41 (dilated to a 4), 42 weeks 5 days was a 6 when I was admitted for induction. I had a c-section the next day.

Don't sweat it - enjoy this prep time.

I have to ask, are you interested in going to college? There are several programs available to help young moms - and I have become an expert at helping at navigation. Drop a line if you're interested.

S.

Hi H.,
Congratulations on your baby! May God Bless you as you become a Mother! You are blessed to have your Mom close by.

R.

H., First all of all let me tell you how very proud I am of you for finishing your high school education - you have set a precedent for your baby already. Not to mention that you chose to have the baby which is awesome, in my opinion. Please know you're in my prayers along with your sweet little one. If you are a member of a good local church that teaches the Bible, you're already ahead of the game. Get connected there and raise your baby by God's instruction book (Bible) and love. Thank God for your Mom who is ready to help you as well - what a blessing she is...God bless you, baby and your futures. I know God has a very bright one planned for you and your sweet baby. You are inspiring to me - stay on track - you're doing FANTASTIC!!!

Hello mama-to-be!

Many women go almost two weeks past their due date. I personally went 10 days past. Due dates are approximations. This is a special time, so even though it may seem impossible (I do remember the going crazy waiting feeling), just relax...take a walk...read a book...work on a project...do something productive, or something you enjoy...because your baby will come when your baby wants to come and you need to limit your stress at this time. This is my well-intentioned advice! Good luck to you.

It has been my experience that already being dilated to a 3 doesn't indicate when you'll have the baby. I've had friends who were that far along for over a week and others who were not dilated at their dr's appt, only to go into labor within a couple of days. It is all just a waiting game! All you can do is try to prepare yourself for when it happens. Take advantage of a nap everyday--prepare some freezer meals, go grocery shopping and stock up, etc. Your life will soon be totally focused on a new little one!! Good luck!

Congratulations on your baby! Also on your GED. You have done so well already! I was 23 when I had my first child, and just as nervous as you. I had no family nearby, and I didn't have a clue what to expect. I ended up going into labor 10 days 'late', then being in labor for 15 hours. I guess it just happens when it happens! There is no way to predict it, just try to keep yourself calm and stress free while you wait. I used to go and sit in my baby's room and imagine her with me. I'd nap in the rocking chair, and just relax as much as possible.

My sister had her son when she was 17, also without the daddy. She did so well, it was the rest of us that were nervous! She had a complicated pregnancy, but the labor was pretty easy for her, and she recovered very quickly. Actually, today is her son's 20th birthday.

You have already proved that you are a strong person, and I know that you will cope with everything that isto come in the same way. You should be very proud of yourself for turning things around. I'm proud of you! Best of luck,

S.

I know it's tough to wait, but hang in there! I don't know why doctors try to predict when your baby will come, because there is really no way to know for sure. You could barely be dilated to a 1 and have the baby the same day; or you can walk around at a 3 or 4 for several weeks.

Also, you should know that the average length of gestation for a first-time mom is actually just over 41 weeks, not 40 as you may have heard. So try to get some rest, and do something to take your mind off things - go see a movie or go out with friends. Also, if you haven't taken a childbirth class, you might want to check out a book or video from the library so you will know what to expect.

Dear H.,

Of course, you're nervous! Everyone is. Try to stay calm, and trust your doctor. I've said a prayer for you and your baby. I've prayed for a safe delivery and a healthy, happy baby.

I'm proud of you for getting your GED. You should be proud of that as well. Now, you are about to be a mom. You need to be strong and courageous, because you will be responsible not only for yourself, but also for a helpless little baby. He or she will need you. I know you're going to do a great job, but I also hope you will let others help you. I'm glad your mother is supportive and willing to help. Please let her do that.

Stay strong,

Deb D
Joshua 1:9

Don't be surprised if you don't go into labor soon. You can be dilated 3 cm for weeks before your baby comes. My first baby came at 39 weeks but it is very common for first babies to come well after their due date. It is so hard to wait but just try to get plenty of rest for the upcoming labor. It is hard work but so worth it!
If you are healthy and your baby is healthy there is nothing wrong with going past your due date. If you are induced your contractions will be more painful and harder than going into labor naturally. Labor is painful but it is not 1 long continuous contraction. It is a series with breaks in between. When I was having a hard contraction I would think to myself "I only have to make it through this one contraction. In just a minute it will be over and I never have to do that one again. I can check it off my list and I am that much closer to my baby being born." Then it would be over and I could catch my breath, relax and prepare mentally for the next one. I had a very long, natural labor and I would do it all the same way over again.
You can do this like millions of mamas have done it before. your body was made to have babies and deliver them safely. Just listen to your instincts. Thank God for doctors and hospitals but remember that this is your body and they are working for you. Be sure and ask questions about what they are doing and recommending and be sure you feel comfortable with it.
Feel free to contact me if you need any advice or encouragement. I am really excited for you! Having a baby is a wonderful thing.

For tons of info and real peoples birth stories I highly recommend joining the forum at Mothering.com Here is a link to the pregnancy forum http://www.mothering.com/discussions/forumdisplay.php?f=19 Here is the Birth forum with lots of birth stories http://www.mothering.com/discussions/forumdisplay.php?f=213 Here is the one for Breastfeeding http://www.mothering.com/discussions/forumdisplay.php?f=27 and here is the main page with tons of topics covering anything and everything you might have questions about now or very soon http://www.mothering.com/discussions/ If I can be of any help let me know. I wish that you'd gotten more information before now as it can make a really big difference in your experience. There are so many great books I could recommend. But the forum will be really helpful at this point :)

H.,

I'm right there in the same boat. I'm pregnant with my 2nd and my 1st came 8 days early so "obvisiously" I was sure this one woud come even earlier. I will be 39 weeks on Tues and was dilated to 3 almost 3 weeks ago. I went in for another check on Tues and I'm still only at a 4. Hang in there. They say every pregnancy is different. Thankfully for me my son will be here by this coming Tues no matter what because we opted to get induced so my mom could be here from California to help with our daughter and be here for the birth.

Good for you turning your situation around! I too was a little unsure about my first pregnancy. My mom didn't really talk to me much about my body, sex, or adulthood, when I was a teen. Due to a bad experience with doctors when I was 6 years old, I was too scared to go when I was sick. I never intended on having kids, and made sure my now husband was OK with that before we got engaged and married. But, since I didn't go to the doctor, I was not on any birth control and got pregnant about a year after we got married. I told the doctor at my very first appointment about the lack of communication from my mom growing up and how I was terrified of doctors and hospitals. He was very nice and educated me a lot. I was 1 week late when I finally went into labor, so don't be surprized if takes some more time. Your body has never been through this process and has to figure it out. My daughter is now 14 and I love her dearly! She also has a 7 year old brother, who was born right on time, her birthday! I had to be induced with him, he was a big baby. Good luck to you, and keep moving in the direction you are headed. God has a plan for you and this little baby is a big part of it.

Jen D.-Frisco

H., I know just how you feel. I too had my first child at 18 and it was very nerve racking yet exciting. I am sorry the father does not want to be apart of this beautiful miracle that is coming. He truly is missing out on something spectacular.

I also dialated to 3 cm with my first child and continued to carry my son for another week until he was born. It is so very hard to say what your body may due at this time since everyone is different. From my experience though, I would stay close to home and the hospital. Once I did go into labor and have contractions things went really fast and I had to go to the hospital very fast. I can also say that based on my experience you may have a very quick and easy delivery since most of the dialtion is taking place for you right now and you are very lucky that you are not having pains during this phase. So have your family on alert because your little miracle could come at any moment.

H.,
This is a very exciting time and you really do need more support and information. Your doctor should explain dilation and the process of giving birth. It would have been excellent to take a childbirth class, but it appears to be too late for that now. I would highly recommend it if you have another child.

You need to have a support person with you in labor. I don't know if your mother is planning to be there, but if not, please get someone who is experienced to help you. Another teenager might be overwhelmed and may not understand the process fully.

Great to hear you got your GED. Please go to college right away. Whatever sacrifice you need to make, make it. It will be hard, but your life raising your baby will be so much better because of the effort.

I don't know if you've talked to a social worker, but at the very least, there will be one available at the hospital. Ask them to point you to resources to help with delivery costs and also to further your education.

Best wishes,

D.

Hello H.!
It looks as though you've already received great responses as to dilation and what to expect, so I won't add to that.
I'd like to offer different advice, though. Since the father isn't interested in being in the baby's life, he should pay child support at the very least. When things calm down a bit for you, or if you have other supportive adults in your life, have someone look into this as soon as possible. You're going to need financial support for the baby. I don't know if this man is older or not, if he has job or not, but do not let him escape the responsibility to the child he helped create. Please, please do this for your child. There are so many expenses that will come up that you can't even imagine yet, and you will need the help. He may not want to be there physically to help you, but he absolutely should be there financially. In addition, the father should be adding the child to his health care plan and covering that monthly cost.

Your baby deserves this. He/she is worth it, and legally speaking, it's the father's obligation! The courts want what 's best for your child, too, and will support you.
I wish you the best! Let us mammas know how things go for you!
Leanne

H.,

You have received very good information and education around your question. I would like to offer a different piece of advice, for your child's sake. Whether the baby's father wants to be involved or not, he still has a financial stake in your child's well-being. As soon as your child is born, file for child support. Have a DNA test done if the father balks. He doesn't have to be an actively involved dad. He just needs to provide financial support for your child. This has nothing to do with you or your relationship with him - don't let your emotions override your intelligence. DO NOT GIVE IN ON THIS! I can't stress this enough. See an attorney to have the papers drawn up. The courts may also state that you have to allow visitation. If he is not going to be in the baby's life, that's no problem. If he is, it is only fair that he has a chance to meet the baby.

Congratulations for turning your life around, and receiving your GED. You will be an awesome mom. I am glad your mom is there for you, too. That will be a huge blessing for you.

Blessings,
J.

I'm sure your baby will come soon :) Stay patient and remember children come on their own schedule, not yours. My son was 3 weeks early and my daughter was 2 weeks late - so you just never know. Maybe you will be one of the lucky ones who has a quick delivery since you are already dialated to 3!

Good Luck!!

H.

Congratulations to you and your family. I have had 3 children and they all have been different. If you have satellite, watch the Discovery Health channel. There are some good programs on there that will show you what labor is all about and what some doctors do in certain areas of labor. Now some of the programs are deep and can scare you but don't let that bother you because not all labors are like those. Your first baby may take longer to get here seeing how it is your first. Some people never go through labor pains. Dilating can take up to 2 moths sometimes depending on when it starts and how far up there your baby is. Braxton hick’s contractions are false labor contractions they are preparing your body for REAL labor. You need to relax and let your doctor take over there is nothing you can do to make your baby come any sooner DO NOT TAKE CASTOR OIL TO MAKE YOUR LABOR START...This will hurt your baby it can make your baby poop in its fluid and become sick. I hear so many people talk about taking it but it doesn't work it will do more harm than good. If anything try walking, that will sometimes work. But, if your baby isn't ready to come the only way it can be forced out is if the Doctor induces. If your doctor doesn't have you on a kick chart this might be something you can do. You count how many kicks your baby does in a 2 hour to 3 hour range I think if less than 10 kicks in a 2 hour period the doctors really want to know this. I know the last 8 months were long and the last month seems even longer but the wait is worth it you don't want your baby born to early its lungs may not be developed; the baby’s lungs usually start to develop between 32 and 39 weeks. If you go into labor and your doctor doesn't think it is good they will stop your labor and start giving you steroids to develop them. Now on the other note I raised my first two children by myself there father wasn't around for the first 9 years. It was a blast, but hard. You will be fine the baby’s father will come to realize in time what a dud he has been and want to play daddy. If you have a Good support system in your family you will be fine. Ok this is not pushing anything on you but...Do you go to church? My church family was awesome in helping me when I needed anything even just to talk or need a friend there was always someone there. The saying "It takes a village to raise a child.” this is so true. Invest in your child, your time, love. It will come back to you in so many ways. My two are 16 yrs and 14 yrs old now and are great Teens. I went as far as to start over I now have a 14 month old He is the happiest baby I think I ever saw. And I am sure you will feel the same when your little one gets here. Again Congratulations.

T.

Sounds like everything is coming along normal. Babies just come when they are ready, none of my four were on their due date, but it does sound like you are going to deliver anyday. Good for you for moving past the father of your baby, I'm sure somethng good out there will come along, and your life will be great. Sounds like you have your head on straight now, and will be a great mom. it will be hard , but worth it, so glad your mom is close and suportive. You are going to do fine. congratulations!!!

Congrats and good luck to you!

I second watching a video tape if you haven't taken a class. It will help you so much while you're in labor if you have seen a tape or been to a class.

There's so much going on with your body and there's alot more to go before birth happens. But the baby will be here before you know it!

First off, congratulations!

It could be tomorrow, it could be 4 more weeks. Sometimes women are dialated even more than than that for weeks. This is a good thing. It probably means you will have a quicker and easier labor! YOu won't even be full term until the end of 40 weeks and not really overdue until after 42 wks. Waiting at the end is the hardest, I know.

I know it is hard, especially being your first, but try to think positive thoughts about how well your labor is going to go. Also, take this time to appreciate all the time you have for yourself. Being pregnant and giving birth are by FAR the easiest part of being pregnant.

Good luck