Having a Hard Time Juggling Being a Working Mom

I am 46 with a 15 year old - I have always been a single working Mom.

What I have learned to do is to cook on weekends - things that can be re-heated and served during the week, or "re-invented" into other, quick meals. A pot of red beans, spaghetti sauce, a roasted chicken, casseroles, etc. During the week just add a quick veggie, and viola dinner is served.

I don't sweat the little things - mail on the kitchen table? Eh, I'll glance through it, throw away the junk and sort the important things. Laundry - I do on and off during the week - throw a load in the wash in the morning and dry it when I get home in the evening.

I try and run small errands on the way home or on lunch time...but, honestly, I usually just do them on the weekends. I find when I put off needing something on, say a Tuesday, by the time weekend rolls around I realize that it was more of an impulse desire and I usually don't need it after all. Saves me money :)

I decided years ago when my son was little that I would rather come home and enjoy time with him rather than scrub walls and polish floors. Our house is a little cluttered - not everything is in its place - but for the past 15 years of parenting I have managed to spend more time with him than with the mop - to me, that is more important than a perfect house.

Don't sweat the little things K. - if the dishes don't get done right away - just rinse them and let soak in the sink overnight, towels, sheets, and sweat pants can be thrown in the washing machine in the morning and dried when you get home - it is okay if they stay in the clean hamper for an evening or two until you put them away.

Look for little ways to reduce the pressure you feel from getting it all every night - in the long run, no one is going to suffer from a frozen pizza and a pile of mail on the table.

Good Luck
God Bless

If you do some cooking on the week end it can really help lessen the dinner time preparation.

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^HB Meat
Get your HB meat in the 10lb. chubs.

Cook all of it at once then put it in 5 (I always do 5 so that way I have 5-2lb HB meats) quart size freezer bags.

If you cook things like HB Helper you put 2 boxes of HB Helper to one bag of HB meat. If you do stew then you have the equivalent of 2lbs. uncooked HB meat in one bag.

****************************************Chicken
Buy the large bags of chicken leg quarters and cook them all together in a stock pot.

Boil them in a large stock pot. I take them out but keep the water simmering. I de-skin them and de-bone them and add the bones and skin back into the simmering water.

I chop, mush, or tear the chicken into bits and then divide them equally in to quart size freezer bags. I use some for chicken and noodles or dumplings, some for sour cream chicken enchiladas, etc...you can just pop them meat into what ever dish you are cooking and it goes much faster since the meat is already cooked.

I take the water, it's now a wonderful hearty broth, and drain it in to a large pot by using a kitchen hand towel or some cheese cloth. It can be messy if you don't pour slowly. You can take some of the larger bones and stuff out with a slotted/holey spoon if you want to first. I always check the debris to see if I missed any large pieces of meat too. Then discard the junk. If you want to cool the broth then skim off the top layer of fat you can do that by just letting it sit for a little bit then put it in the fridge. When it's cold the fat will peel of quite easily.

I put it in gallon or quart size freezer bags and freeze it. I pop it in the pan by peeling the bag off of it. If you keep your bags then just sit the whole thing in some very warm water to melt the outer broth then it will slip/pour out.

I put a bag of broth in the pot, add some chicken, then when it starts to boil I tear biscuits up and drop them in the boiling fluid. You can season these chicken and dumplings however you like them but I like mine with just a bit of salt mixed in. I cook the dumplings a few minutes then eat. Same with the Reamus frozen Noodles, just keep the broth boiling and add them then cook them how the package says.

*********************Other options
There are so many other options too.

Meatloaf cooked on the weekend then frozen.

Spaghetti sauce can simmer all day on Saturday then go into freezer bags. The only time spent on that meal would be the cooking of the pasta and maybe buttering up some garlic bread. I make mine with a gallon of good quality tomato sauce then add cooked HB meat with onions, mushrooms, garlic from a little jar, and bell peppers cooked in it, then add some of the Spice Classic Seasoning from Walmart ( the cheap stuff $0.50-$0.75) and some marjoram or other Italian seasonings. Then let it simmer for a while. They eat it up.

You can make lasagna the after it cools you can slice it up and put it in containers for individual servings or even for 1-2 meals.

There are so many meals that can be cooked ahead of time.I do not leave the house with electronic stuff cooking so crock-pot meals are a no go for me. I would rather cook them then heat them up as soon as I get home. I heat the food in the microwave first then put the crock in the pot to keep it warm. It saves some time due to the crock-pot not actually being good at heating food quickly.

Also, paper plates and plastic forks and spoons save so much time. Their cost equals what it takes for you to wash and dry them in the dishwasher and it way cheaper than if you wash by hand because your time is worth more than doing dishes.

I totally understand my husband and I both worked for years and it was so tough.
I did a load of laundry every morning and in the evening throw it in the dryer and started another load, it was just constant. My husband would fold while sitting on the sofa. Each of us took our clothing to our rooms and put them away.

We live where it is fairly warm, so we gill a LOT. So when we grill, I grill multiple things at the same time, chicken (legs for daughter, breast for us), Sausages, Pork chops, Pork tenderloin, Hamburger patties. Veggies, egg plant, onions and peppers. If we grilled fish, we ate it that night. All of this also freezes great. When I find things on sale, we stock up grill and freeze.

Chicken could be shredded and eaten on tortillas, sliced for sandwiches, chopped for casseroles or salads, stuffed baked potatoes. Or just eaten as is as the main dish. Add BBQ sauce for BBQ chicken.

Sausages.. As wraps in tortillas, added to beans, Gumbo (Zatarans Box mix can cook in microwave)or sliced and used as breakfast meat.

Pork chops same as above like chicken.

Rice can be made in the microwave. Look at the packaging for instructions. I make double the amount,. the leftover rice can be made into fried rice another night with meat chopped veggies a scrambled egg and soy sauce.

Crockpot Chili, Crock pot stew, Pulled pork, Pot roast.. I keep the crockpot liners in the empty crockpot so I have easy clean up.

If I make meatballs, I make dble or triple the mount and freeze. I purchase store brand pasta sauces, I always have a ton of different pastas. Good with just butter, salt and pepper.

We eat a salad every night, so when I worked I purchased Big Bags of prepped salad. But you can prewash and store the lettuce with damp paper towels in plastic bags.

Left over Spaghetti sauce can be used on sliced french bread to make pizzas.

Make a nice fruit salad on the weekend and you all can have fruit salad for days.. Breakfast, dessert or snack.

Cleaning the house and I mean really cleaning, became too stressful at one point so we hired a lady to come once a week (on fridays) for 4 hours to Vacuum Mop, Clean the bathroom and really clean the kitchen. She was fast enough, she also changed and wash our sheets, and many times folded all of our clothing. There were times she even cleaned our oven, dusted and wiped our floorboards! At the time we paid her $15. per hour and she was worth it!!!!!

I keep thinking with the economy the way it is now, some people should consider cleaning homes for working families. I know a lot of people that would pay $15 to $20, per hour for a good /honest house cleaner.. Work 4 hours a day 5 days a week? That is nice extra money.

I make pots of sauce, on the weekends, or anything you can do in a crock pot really helps. You can make soups, stews, chili, etc. With winter coming soup and a grill cheese sandwich can be a simple dinner. Save big dinners for the weekends so you do not have to stress out. If you can afford to get a cleaning lady even if it is every two weeks, it will really help out. Lay out clothes the night before for you and your son and have lunches ready as well. It will take time but you will get the hang of it. If your son is old enough have him help out, making his own lunch, helping you cook, help with the dishes, etc. It can be turned into a time for you to spend with him, by talking about his day, and he is helping too!!

When I first went back to work I felt all I did was go to work and then clean, cook, do laundry and childcare. Never a moment for enjoyment, even time to enjoy my kids. Now I make sure to have fun with my little one on weekends. That means Dad does half the grocery shopping and laundry. (He can shop on his way home from work, you've already picked up your child and do a load of laundry on the weekends) I try to do laundry in the evenings, one night to wash and dry, the next night to fold and put away, so I have more time to play on the weekends. I like having lots of leftover cooked ground turkey or leftover chicken to make quick meals during the week. ( Use it with pasta, pop it into a tortilla w/ cheese and salsa, or make mini pizzas w/ english muffins or tortillas I always keep lunch meat, pasta, turkey pepperoni, canned spagetti sauce on hand, I bake pumpkin muffins or peach muffins or peanut butter cookies on days off and freeze them so my little one has healthy home made treats from time to time. My husband likes to make soup or chili - great big pot at a time! At night I lay at my son's clothes for school while he's putting on his pajamas. Before I collapse on the couch I make sure his shoes are by the door, pack his lunch and put in fridge, and his backpack is packed and ready.

Hi K.,

I feel for 'ya! I'm 45 and have 3 daughters, 14, 12 and 7. I was a SAHM for 10 years and returned to the full-time work force almost 2 years ago. I often find myself wondering if it's worth it--I work for a non-profit where the pay is abysmal, but it is fairly family friendly so I do have somewhat flexible hours (although it seems I never put in less than 45 hours/week--I am able to work some from home and leave early/go in late when I have school activities or doctor's appointments to attend). That flexibility helps me to retain my sanity. Also, the Weber grill is my savior--my husband or I take something out of the freezer in the morning and he throws it on the grill when he gets home--voila, quick dinner, easy clean-up. Finally, and this is not for everyone, we invited my mother-in-law to live with us. She has her own room and full bath downstairs, and she is here when the kids get home from school and still drives so she can pick them up when they have after school activities. It isn't easy--we all have to compromise to get along--but it gives me peace of mind knowing there is an adult present when the kids are home and I'm not. Try to leave work at work so you can enjoy your family when you're home. Good luck--you can do it!

One thing that could is making extra of freezer friendly meals on the weekends. Some things that I make that freeze well for a fast meal later are things like lasagna or casseroles, currys, enchilada (we like chicken and black bean), and stews. Also, anything you can throw in the slow cooker before you leave in the morning.

My husband doesn't 'help' - he shares the responsibilities. Generally if I pick DS up at school, DH makes dinner. If he picks up, I am making dinner. We decided before having our son that we would both make sure to be home by 6 pm and we have adjusted our work schedules accordingly. Can your husband work through lunch and leave an hour earlier or adjust his schedule in some other way?

Quick meals - spaghetti (whole grain) with pesto (I make and freeze in ice cube trays so we have them all winter), steamed veggies (broccoli, cauliflower, peas, green beans, etc) - not inspired but perfectly edible and fast.

I cook a couple of big meals on the weekend that we can have for leftovers during the week, and I keep a couple of frozen pizzas in the freezer for those nights when you just don't want to cook or do anything but heat up a pizza.

A way I keep up on laundry is start a load before I leave and pop it in the dryer when I get home. That way it doesn't just pile up and get overwhelming by the weekend.

Hugs. It can be tough, especially at first.

Something you might want to consider is cooking on weekends or doing prep work so you can just grab and heat during the week. Get a crock pot. It's wonderful to come home at the end of the day to a hot meal. Consider something like Let's Dish now and then for frozen meals.

DH and I used to tag team stuff like getting the diaper bag repacked, or washing the linens for daycare and we still tag team the household chores. Instead of trying to do all the laundry, maybe start the routine that somebody puts a load in at bedtime and someone swaps in the morning and you fold as a family while watching TV or something. And try not to do everything at once. Try tackling one thing every night and let the rest (as reasonable) go.

Give yourself time to adjust to this new schedule. It won't happen overnight and that's ok! Here are my tips:
Get eveyrthing ready the night before or as much as you can get the energy for (have outfits ready and laid out for the kids and even you, cereal bowls, spoons, cups out on the table for breakfast and anything that needs to be taken to school right by the front door)
Do one load of laundry a night
I have one of those cordless super lightweight small vacuumes and I use it daily to quickly vaccum the kitchen/front door area end of day. Trust me, you'll notice the difference. Have your husband or even child do this before they go up to bed/bath time.
Simple dinners - save the fancy ones for the weekend
Some easy recipes - Pesto Chicken - place breaded chicken breasts in casserole dish, cover with pesto sauce and provolone cheese - bake at 375 for 45 minutes - you can use shake and bake breading to skip the whole egg, flour and bread crumbs ordeal
Sausage and Veggie bake - italian and polish sausage cut up, green & red pepper cut up (not diced), cut up onion and potatoes (no need to peel), drizzle iwth olive oil, garlic powder & whatever other herbs you like and bake at 400 for 45 minutes covered.
Zesty Penne & Sausage - buy hot italian suasage, crumble and cook in frying pan, add green & red pepper slices (by the way you can find these with onions in the frozen section all cut up and in a nice bag!), add your favorite spaghetti sauce and simmer for about 20 minutes. Boil pasta in the meantime, mix all together when sausage sauce in done.
Roasted Red Pepper and Chicken - Use a good chunky italian dressing and pour over chicken breasts, pop in the oven with roasted red peppers (buy them in the jar) and provolone cheese covering the chicken. Bake.
I LOVE crockpots esp during the fall and winter - theres tons of recipes. Try www.crockpotgirls.com. I get all my non perishable ingrediants ready the night before and put them right by the crockpot (and if there's stuff to measure out like spices I get that ready too so I'm not fooling around with a measuring spoon while the kids are running around).

You can do this! Don't expect to be June Cleaver...find what method suits you best and go with it!

I did that for years. worked 9-5, picked up my son and was home about 6. By the time I made dinner and did dishes and packed lunches, I had a 1/2 hour to chill before bedtime. We have to be up by 5:00 to get ready for school. the bus comes at 6:45. I have changed my hours to work 7:30-3;30 which makes a HUGE difference. I do real cleaning every other weekend. I do a load of laundry in the morning then if theres time before the bus comes, I do another. Just do what you can . I have hosted girls dinners once a month just as an incentive to clean the house. When you feel defeated just make it a chill day.
You could try crock pot dinners. Those are easy.

I hear you. Except for maternity leave, I have always worked outside the home. What I have learned is that it is not possible to do it all alone. Because you work, you'll need a little help getting the "mom" tasks done. It's always good when your husband can help, but if he is unable to help as much as you need him to, then you may have to outsource some help! For me, I have found that having a cleaning lady come in once a week is invaluable. Even if you just have someone who cleans the bathrooms and mops/vacuums, that can make the difference between sanity and mental breakdown!

As you've pointed out, getting dinner on the table is the other hurdle for working moms. Remember that not every meal needs to be a culinary masterpiece. It is totally okay to have deli sandwiches for dinner sometimes. (In fact, on Thursday nights when I go from work to daycare to the girls' ballet class, and we get home at 8pm, we always have deli sandwiches - it's a lifesaver.) Aside from that. I buy about 20 dinners a month from Dream Dinners - you go once a month, and in the span of 2 hours, assemble 20 meals, which then go into your freezer as soon as you get home. You choose which meals you buy, and if there are ingredients you don't care for, you don't have to put those in. Anyhow, the night before, move one meal from the freezer to the fridge. When you get home from work the next day, it's thawed out, and you can have dinner on the table in half an hour or less, most times. The cost is actually cheaper, I've found, than going to the grocery store all the time, and/or buying takeout. And it saves you the hassle of having to think of what to make, shopping for groceries, prepping ingredients, etc. If you don't have Dream Dinners near you, then there's always Super Suppers, Dinner My Way, etc.

Aside from that, just hang in there. You will get into a routine, and your husband will adjust to shouldering more responsibility around the house. Just remember that needing help is normal!