Help! I Need Help with My 2 Month Olds Sleep Habits + Any Book Recommendations

Updated on November 01, 2007
S.Y. asks from Pittsburgh, PA
8 answers

First of all, thank you to everyone who responded to my "Baby gagging on pacifier" problem. All great advice!
Some relevant info: I breastfeed, do not co-sleep, and my daughter has been congested for well over a month. I am trying to break the "nursing to sleep" habit, as that resulted in disaster with my first son who didn't sleep through the night until he was over 2!
My daughter Madi has "switched" her days and nights. She has been going to bed anywhere from 2 am to 5 am. Needless to say, I am exhausted and and my sleep deprivation is threatening to turn into depression. I cannot even get a nap, as now Madi is rejecting my pumped milk in a bottle. I am an avid reader, and am having a hard time discerning what method would work for us. I laugh when I hear people say "put your baby down drowsy but awake" as my baby would have NONE of that. I started reading "Babywise" which had some great suggestions, until they spoke about letting your baby "cry it out" (I simply cannot do it!) I have also read "the Happiest Baby" and the "Baby Whisperer".Does anyone have any good books to read/advice to give? Even any opinions about the books I have mentioned? Has the feed-wake-sleep cycle worked for anyone? I love my daughter so much, and just want whats best for her (don't we all!) and for me to be in good shape to take proper care of her.
Thanks, everyone.....:)
ps. Any nursing Moms have any advice on the bottle issue? I don't want to wean, just be able for her to take my milk in a bottle!

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T.S.

answers from Pittsburgh on

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R.D.

answers from Pittsburgh on

Hi, My son was just like that... I swear by Elizabeth Pantley's "No Cry Sleep Solutions"--I stumbled upon it on ebay and it changed our lives--although he was nearly 10 mos before he slept through the night...

the other thing that SAVED me was my hub took the baby from ca. 5:30-6 AM until he had to leave for work ca. 8:30 AM--I LIVED on those hours of sleep...

My son was one of those newborns who could never be put down, so we were in direct physical contact unless my hub was relieving me--ca. 20 hrs a day--and now that I am back to work, I can't tell you how much I value all of that enforced closeness we had.

Good Luck!

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A.J.

answers from Pittsburgh on

I read and LOVED the happiest baby on the block--it became my baby bible. I had a VERY colicky baby and followed the tips in that book to a T. It was the only way I got my little one to calm down. She would literally cry 24/7 while awake. Swaddling really helped her. And I also had the same issue w/bottles. I tried every one on the market and the only one that she would take was made by Adiri. It's shaped like a breast. They're pretty expensive but I found them on ebay (new of course) and save a bit that way. I totally understand your frustration. I work full time as a pharmacist and was really panicking when I had to go back to work and my daughter still didn't want a bottle! Lastly, about the crying it out....in my opinion it's something you have to do at some point. although your daughter is certainly too young for that. I don't think I let her cry it out when she was about 7 months. And after a few nights of that she was fine and falling back asleep on her own without any problems.
Hope some of that helps. Good luck!!

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M.L.

answers from Pittsburgh on

Advice? Well, my son is no longer nursing, but he wakes up several times a night insisting that he wants a bottle. We co-sleep, so my partner and I just get up every few hours and get a fresh bottle. Initially, I nursed him thorugh the night, and I guess he's still in the habit of wanting that sort of comfort when he wakes up. So, yeah, feeling your pain there. I'm concerned that he won't sleep thorugh the night until he's in grade school. Yeah, that "drowsy but not asleep" stuff never worked for me either. That's why my son still sleeps with us and his crib is simply collecting dust.

So, I can offer you sympathy and an ear to listen, and if you find anything out, please share it with me.

Sleep is for the weak! Make this your mantra. You may still be tired, but at least you'll have a sense of humor about it.

Good luck! And take care.

M.

1 mom found this helpful

B.K.

answers from Pittsburgh on

S., I truly feel for you!! I have been there, done that. Greatfully my girls are all much older (10, 13 & 15) and I can sleep through the night..at least until the dating thing starts LOL.

Try keeping your baby up a bit longer durring the day every day, every five minutes counts. Keep the blinds open durring the day, don't be quiet durring the day...do your normal activities...tv, vacume, radio whatever. She'll figure out when the best time is to sleep quickly!

As far as the bottles, when I nursed my youngest my husband (or anyone else) could give her any bottle any time. As long as I was nursing she wouldn't take a bottle from me until she was weaned.

My suggestion to you is to get the books: what to expect the first year and what to expect the toddler years. Yes, they are by the same great ladies that wrote what to expect when your expecting. I found both books to be a great help with my girls, and are still a great help with the little one I babysit (she's almost 9 months old). I too am a stay at home Mom now and I don't live too far from the Waterfront. Drop me an email when you are awake!

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A.M.

answers from Pittsburgh on

Hi. I found "The Baby Sleep Book" but William Sears extremely helpful. It was basic common sense. I also found that my son didn't like laying flat. I found a wedge that had the roll pads at Babies-R-Us. That made a huge difference. Between the using the wedge and implementing the methods in the book, my son started sleeping very well. Bedtime is easy now, because my son learned very early how to teach himself to go to sleep instead of relying on other methods. I have friends who could wouldn't try the book, and now at age three, they fight at bedtime.

Good luck.

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H.

answers from Pittsburgh on

I'm nursing my third child and I guess I've been lucky in that mine have all been pretty easy about the bottle compared to horror stories I've heard. One suggestion I'll offer is to keep offering the bottle. Try different things - you offer it and try having your husband or someone else offer it. Also try different bottle styles. All three of mine have used different bottles. Both of my daughters liked the wide mouthed nipple styles - my first daughter liked Avent and my current nurser likes the new wide Nuk bottle. My son liked the Evenflo Comfi which is the narrow style. All three claimed to promote breastfeeding. My littlest one was ok trying the Evenflo's that I had left from my son, but she would suck and suck with no results - she just couldn't figure out how to get the milk out. She has no problems with the Nuk. I wonder if that is what upsets other babies that refuse bottles?

When the bottle is offered, squirt a small amount out to help your daughter quickly recognize the taste/smell. Maybe try initially using fresh milk. When it is frozen or refrigerated and reheated, it often separates and has a slight texture to it. Offering it "freshly squeezed" will make all of that as close to what she is used to.

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J.M.

answers from Pittsburgh on

Hi S.,

We used the "No Cry Sleep Solution" book with our son and it was helpful, although we co-slept until he was 11 months old and then started. I think it will be easier if you start earlier.

for the bottle - the best thing to do is to have someone else give your baby the bottle and it is best if you are not home when it happens. Even if you go into the other room, babies are pretty smart and they know you are close by - so they may not drink until you are actually out of the house. Go run some errands and have your hubby give the bottle. Once she gets used to taking it, it will be easier to do when you are around. Also, try a bunch of different kinds of bottles. My son was pretty picky about what types of bottles he would take - we used the Playtex nurser and Playtex ventaire.

J.
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