Help We Need Sleep!!!!

Updated on May 03, 2008
A.M. asks from New York, NY
17 answers

I have a 23 month old son who's never been a great sleeper but not too horrible either. however for the last 3 weeks he's been waking up EVERY hour. he doesn't cry or fuss he just walks to our room to get us then walks back to his room and climbs in bed to be tucked in and falls asleep again. we can't figure out why he's waking up, he goes to sleep easily and there haven't been any changes to our routine or life so far. i'm 7 months pregnant though and i can't keep waking up like this! if anyone has any ideas on what to do i'd really like to hear from you!
thanks in advance,
A.

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R.C.

answers from New York on

Since he isn't crying or fussing, have you tried just telling him that you are sleeping and he should go back to his bed.

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L.H.

answers from Little Rock on

Maybe he's anxious about the new baby and how that will change things in the family. He probably wants to feel like he is still the baby, i.e. getting all the attention even at night.

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K.H.

answers from Utica on

Hi A.
Wow! Congrats on the new baby. None of mine slept through the night like you would think. But... Are you sure he is awake? Our daughter did alot of sleep walking. Our son just didn't require alot of sleep(2 hours/in 24 hours) Still at 32 that is all he sleeps which is so frustrating to his wife. All kids are different.
SAHM since '71. Our twin girls graduate HS in June.
SAHM, married 38 years, with 4 kids including twins.
God bless your family and give may He give you rest.

1 mom found this helpful
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R.W.

answers from New York on

Well, you need to evaluate your routine, i think....

Do you still put him down for a nap? If so, I would eliminate that! I would much rather him sleep when I sleep.

Does he get lots of physical activity during the day? I would let him play as hard as he can all day so that at night he is simply exhausted! I purposely will not take long trips to the store because I know my little one will fall asleep in the car...and I want her to sleep at night more than nap.

What do you do in the hours before bedtime? Is it lots of activity, TV? If so, change to more subdued activities. I know my husband will get the kids all rialed up when he gets home from work, playing, teasing, rough-housing, etc....which is fine, but I have to work hard to get them to wind down after dinner.

After dinner acitivities that are good: give him a nice warm bath (I like that Soothing Bath I think it's called by Johnson&Johnson...lavendar bottle), reading some calming stories (I try to NOT read books that have TV characters in them cuz that just gets their brains going again). And, I think this one is most important!...say prayers! There is no reason why God can't help your little one to sleep well. I say a prayer and my little one repeats it...I ALWAYS say, "help me to sleep well and have good dreams". I know it helps!!!! She looks forward to that part of bedtime and reminds me to say prayer. It is very re-assuring to a little one to know that they are protected by not only you, but a higher power as well!

I hope it all works out so you too can get the rest you need.

1 mom found this helpful
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S.K.

answers from New York on

Could it have anything to do with the fact that you are 7 months pregnant? I don't know how much your son comprehends but has anyone been speaking if front of him about your going to the hospital or anything like that. Or maybe it's not anything that specific he may be wondering when the sibling will arrive. Perhaps he's overheard something or misunderstood something that leads him to believe that he may miss something while he's sleeping.
I don't know it's just one possible theory.

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K.B.

answers from Albany on

boy i have been there too... my son started to do the same thing i believe it was just around the same time i was due for my daughter, he would just get up out of his bed walk in wake me and i would just walk back into his room with him, he wouyld climb into bed and i would cover him, up say goodnight and he would be there until morning, i was convinced he wanted to know i was still there. just after he started this i asked him the next morning about coming into my room, he just said he came in to see me, so i began the process the next night of when he came in i did the same walked him back but just befor i left i told him it was still dark and that he had to be in his bed when it was dark and that when the sun came up he could come back in my bed and we could snuggle for a little while, he liked this it seemed to help we broke the habit of getting up as long as he had the extra snuggle time in the morning, even after my daughter came along he did great as long as he had that extra time of just mommy and him, every once in awhile he still comes in mabey once a month or so, i believe it is for that extra time for him.
so just keep trying and be patient it seems like a long time to get him back in the habit but really it is less than a week. just be persistant and it will pay off...

he is probably feeling the pressure of the baby coming and wants mommys attention
good luck

i am a mom of a three year old son and and 18 month old daughter

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L.P.

answers from New York on

sweetheart your son is going through something and it's called he still wants to be the baby i have four kids and everytime had another they went thourh something it's not you but thats what going to go through. hes is going to be fine just give him his time . sometime go in his room and sleep with him and talk to him that you need him to be a big boy and then give some responiblites small things all kids do this if a person notice it or not

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A.G.

answers from New York on

Is he trully awake or is he sleep walking??? I know sometimes it is hard to tell the difference. Can you just tell him go back to bed and will he do it on his own? He may just be checking to make sure you are still there. Try giving him a slightly used shirt of your to sleep with to tuck next to his head. It might be just enough to help him go back to sleep right away without getting up. Avoid at all cost putting him in your bed. It will make it harder in the long run to get him out again. Also don't use meds of any sort. It can make his little body dependent on it to sleep and you don't need that problem either. A.

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M.S.

answers from New York on

Make sure he gets lots of fresh air and exercise. At his age he will benefit in every way if you get him to a park every day. If you can't do that, at least get in a good walk in the evening - not a destination walk - an adventure -- look for animals, insects, find trees, signs etc. My other recommendation is storytime before bed. Establish a special time for "just the two of you" now, and maintain it after your next child comes, making sure he understands this is your special time together.

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D.Z.

answers from New York on

Wow, you must be exhausted! You mentioned that there hasn't been any changes to your routine, but you also mentioned that you are 7 months pregnant, and that's a big change! Though your son doesn't fully understand what's to come, he is most likely reacting to you being pregnant/the upcoming birth (to the obvious and subtle changes around him). I would not underestimate the impact of this. It sounds like your son's wake ups and walks back to bed are a way keep connected with mommy. Perhaps he needs a bit more reassurance and attention during this time period (but during the daytime!).

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T.Q.

answers from Albany on

If he is happy and his room is baby proofed, put a door nob safety lock on the inside of his bedroom door so he can't get out. We have one in my 2 year old daughters room so when she wakes up in the morning or after nap she won't wander around on her own before we hear her. If you have a monitor, you can still hear him if he really needs you. If he is fine, but waking up randomly, he will figure out how to go back to sleep on his own.
He could be sensing that there will be change soon. My daughters sleep habits changed a little around the time my son was born 2 months ago.

good luck

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E.S.

answers from Albany on

Make sure hes getting enough excercise. Make sure he is not eating suger products or anything with caffeine. Do you have a calm and peaceful bathtime/bedtime ritual? Bedtime snack a good idea bananas have tryptophan which encourages sleep and warm milk.

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S.S.

answers from New York on

I can tell you the advice my pediatrician gave me......give him Benadryl. Dr. Stone was the "Doctor's doctor" in New York at the time. All the doctors took their own children to him because he was the best. Try it once and see if it changes your son's new habit.

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A.B.

answers from New York on

Hi A.,
It's a no-brainer "why" he's doing it--he smells the competition and needs to keep checking that you wont forget about him when Jr. arrives. The hard part is reassuring him that he is just as important in general, and getting him to stay in bed specifically. There are books on sibling issues--what to say to the older child in anticipation of the baby's arrival. I have always found positive reinforcement to be very successful, so tell him that if he stays in bed all nite he gets 5 stars, if he gets up once he gets 4 stars, if he gets up more then once he gets no stars. If he accumulates 15 stars he gets to have a double fudge sundae or whatever he loves most for dessert or wherever he loves most to go (the zoo). Keep a chart on the refrigerator door to count the stars(a little math education,too-5 stars for 3 days in a row...)
I did it for toilet training with a Thomas toy incentive, but they are usually more cheaply rewarded than that.
Good luck!

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M.K.

answers from New York on

You could put a gate up in his room, OR move his bed into your room, Either way you will wake up because you will hear him moving about,

DOes he go to daycare, because if he does he may be sleeping too long during the day time hours.

If not, Don't let him Nap past 230 pm.
And put him to bed one hour later than usual at 9pm

Edit:

Why not just pull him into your bed the first time and let him fall asleep, then later on before he wakes up in the moring, move him back to his bed?

It shouldn't interfere with you new baby, especially if your using a bassinette, Just nurse and put the baby in the bassinette.

Good luck

M

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J.Z.

answers from New York on

Hi A.,

Your son may see that you are changing and wants to make sure things are okay. If it were me I would try getting one of those teddy bears that you can record a saying on that he can press or maybe some type of intercom or walkie talkie that he can talk to you from his bed instead of getting up and getting you up until he realizes you are still around. Maybe you can stay up for the first few hours (may need to pull an all nighter) and be there by his side when he starts to get up and sing to him immediately or rub his back whatever your normal way of relaxing him to sleep for the night and do it one hour less each 2 nights until he has stayed in the bed the whole night. He may have just trained his body to get up and just needs to be retrained. It may be hard for you at the start but worth it for the long term. Just some ideas, good luck. (warm milk before bed helps with sleep sometimes too)

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A.T.

answers from New York on

Is he awake or is he sleep walking when he comes to get you?When he comes to wake you, try sleeping with him in his room. Perhaps your pregnancy is affecting your son as it gets closer to term. Children react differently and this might be his way of showing there is a change coming. Try sleeping with him for a bit and see how that works.

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