My 3-1/2 year old daughter has begun what I hope (and think) is a phase in which often she pretends to be herself AND another little girl. The other girl has the name of a girl that stayed with her at the sitter's house about a year ago. When it happens, one side of her is Hannah and one side is Eva. They talk to each other, help each other out, argue with each other (if one wants something the other has, she is pulling with both hands, if one is doing something the other doesn't want her to do, she will put the other hand to the side and tell her to stop or stay there). It doesn't appear to alter her behavior in any negative way, and she seems perfectly aware of both at the same time, not losing her true person, Hannah. I like to think she's learning coping, problem-solving, empathy and sharing through this pretend play. She has an outstanding imagination in general and is an exceptionally compassionate and empathetic child, very concerned for others. I just want to make sure this is actually normal and not something that may be a sign of potential problems. Please help!
Thank you to EVERYONE that responded! I didn't know what to expect as this was my first post! It helped reaffirm what I felt I already knew, that all is well and normal. I guess I just always thought of imaginary friends as apart from the child, not "within the same body". :-) My daughter is wonderful and amazing (as every mom should say!), and she is very intelligent and perceptive. She is extremely creative and has a grand imagination that allows her to entertain herself for hours...but she also plays well with others. I love her, and I love watching and listening to her.
Just wanted to say thank you to ALL who responded. I hope I can help you one day too. :D
This isn't abnormal. When I was little (around 4 or 5) my brother and I pretended to have "alter-egos" We had sun glasses with lenses popped out and when we put them on I was Crystal and he was Spice. Lol
My very bright first born made up an imaginary freind about that age. I was worried, but it eventually passed.
your instincts are dead on. she sounds wonderful. please don't try to 'fix' this magical phase! she's developing useful skills and having a great time.
:) khairete
S.
Isn't that what's called an "imaginary friend"? What exactly are you worried about?!
When you ask yourself a question, who answers?
All of us have this ability to have a conversation/debate in our own minds.
This is how kids develop it.
The conversations start externally and eventually become more internal.
It's perfectly normal and nothing to worry about.
An Imaginary Friend. So very natural.
I would set some ground rules for your daughter and Eva. Sit them down and set one rule, Eva is a guest in the house, if she behaves and is a good girl then she can stay and play, if she's naughty then she has to go home.
I had an imaginary friend as a little one, I remember her and that was the one rule. One day she wanted to do something I knew was wrong so I told her she had to go home, she did and didn't come back. I had out grown her.
For my daughter, she like to be animals. No imaginary friend yet, but I did have to deal with Baby Orca the other day.
Good luck.
Don't worry about it mamma! This is how they figure themselves out my dear. My LO has 2 pretend friends named Dr. Robin and Trick. They live together at their grandma's house and one is all red and one is all green.
Sometimes she pretends like she is one of her friends and acts like they do. It's just a learning process for them. No biggie! :)
I heard an imaginary friend it a sign of intelligence. Very normal.
It's completely normal. Let her play.
This sounds like an imaginary friend. My son originaly had 2, one named Oopzin and one named Oopy Wyatt (his name). After a few weeks Oopy Wyatt went away but Oopzin is still around and gets mentioned in some way almost every day. Your daughter sounds alot like my son. Nothing to worry about.
Totally normal. If you're worried there is some "sick" event she is playing out in her mind, it would be demonstrated differently. Girls are just more dramatic. Her imagination is very active, good thing. She is creative than others.
Sounds totally normal to me. The only thing I'd ask since you didn't mention is if she's getting enough time with peers. I wonder if pretend friends tend to happen more if the child is more isolated, than if the child is with a group of peers daily.
Totally normal and good for a kid too. She is absolutely learning coping, problem-solving, empathy and sharing through this process. Imaginary friends are often stress relievers for kids too. In our house my son had a friend named Mimi. He was a little man that lived in his hand....try explaining that to strangers. ;) My son is six and Mimi hasn't made an appearance in quite a while. Sometimes I miss him.
Normal creative child behavior.
I encourage you to video tape her, without her knowledge when she is playing like this, so when she is older, she can see herself.
I remember my imaginary friend.
My dd still does that and she's 9!
Not a big deal, she's very normal, ahead of her classmates in school work and kids enjoy playing with her because of her good imagination.
I still hear my 10year old playing like this with her dolls. Totally normal.
