How Young Is Too Young

My daughter is 5 and has mentioned a few times now that a friend has asked her to sleep over. For me, 5 is too young. Now, if it was a friend of mine's home, one that I trust, I'd probably be fine (I'd be up all night) but I'd at least know she was safe. I would NEVER let her sleep over at a friends house that I didn't know, haven't been to, and not familiar with the whole family that lives there. Call me paranoid!?
M.

Hiya J.:
I don't think your daughter is to young,and I don't think the age difference is a big deal either. She probably looks up to the older girl like shes an older sister.I would suggest,like a few of the others here, to let her go over and familarize herself, with the house, and the family where she'd eventually stay. Let the parents know, that this would be her first sleep-over, and to please call you if she gets (homesick) and wants to go home.Don't be surprised,disapointed,or make the mistake of embarrassing her if she does change her mind. She is spreading her wings a little,and daringly leaving her comfort zone,with you.Allow her this. Its good for her.Best of luck to you.

It really depends on the kid. My daughter does fine at sleep overs, her best friend does not. Instead of a sleep over, maybe you can pick her up at bedtime? They could still do all the sleep over stuff, movies, popcorn, painting nails, etc. but leave out the sleeping. Especially since your daughter has never been there, I wonder how comfortable she would be in telling the other girl's mom if she wanted to go home?

Personally I think its sweet that an 8 year-old is friends with a 5 year-old. My daughter often plays with her best friend's older sister who is 9. The older one loves to be the teacher and my daughter is a great student. LOL

i would give it a try. whats the harm in leting her go. hasnt she been to a granparents house over night? give it a try and if she calls at 10p and wants to come home then you know shes not ready. you may feel different if you let her go and she comes back ok and wanting to do it again.

If that were me, I would not send my girl to sleep-overs yet. My girl is 5 too, and I think it's too young. The only place I would let my girl go to, at this age, is her Aunty's house or my best friend's house. That's all.

It's not just a matter of age or personality. I think the age difference is a factor, and you yourself has never been to this woman's house....you don't really know how it would be for your girl, and you don't really know this woman well...you didn't say she was your "friend." Frankly, nowadays... I think pre-school age is too young for sleep-overs at "strangers" homes....what would the sleep arrangements be? What are the activities? What is the supervision there? What are the rules?

My friends daughter once went to a sleepover, at a friend's house. It turned out all the kids slept in one big room, and there were other adults there, whom she did not know would be there...the adults were drinking etc. One man got a little too close to one of the girls and tried touching her. Yes, a terrible situation... and the other parents were NOT aware of the activities in this house, much less the "parental" quality of care.

So... think about it wisely. Go with your gut feeling, not "peer" pressure.

Good luck and take care,
~Susan
www.cafepress.com/littlegoogoo

I say go with your gut! Do you feel that she could handle sleeping away for a night? I LOVED going to Grandma's by 6 or 7 years, but never stayed with a friend until about 3rd grade. Also, ask her if she thinks she's ready.

hello J.-

I think that depends on your daughter. Has she ever slept over at any ones home before, a family member maybe? If you think she'd do alright, then i think it's fine. My sons have friends who are 5 and they sleep over without an problems.
I think maybe a play date at the house would be wise before a big sleep over. Let your daughter go play with this friend for an afternoon and make sure she's comfortable with being there first.
If she is, then I say send her, just make sure that mom has your phone number and can reach you if your child is afraid in the middle of the night.

Why does an 8 year old want a 5 year old over? Hanging with older kids might get her into things she might be ready for (not bad stuff, but just different maturity levels). My kids have had slumber party with cousins since they were about 3. It really depends on your child and how she handles being gone from you.

I think she is still too young. If it were a family member or something I thin k I would be okay with that but a friends house. makes me a little nervous. at 5 she just doesn't seem old enough to spend the night. I think you should hold off and maybe start with some playdates and then move into spending the night.