Husband Having Issues with White Flour & Gaining Weight.

My husband is perpetually skinny no matter what...this can be a good excuse to eat anything so the method I've used to help him lean towards healthy living is being an example to his children. I had parents who preached but didn't practice, as did he (probably most of us did!). In other words, if he doesn't want his children eating french fries, then he better not buy any for himself! Anyway, when we eat better, they eat better.

As for weight gain, I am good at that. I'm also good at losing. I know that it doesn't matter what my husband thinks about my weight and I know that if I'm leaning on the heavy end of things, I'm only going to do something about it when I want to do something about it. If my doctor offered me no help, I'd go to a different doctor. I can tell you for myself that when I eat things that have lived at one time (fruits, veggies, protein) and excercise at least 20 minutes a day (concentrating on both strength training and cardio), the weight comes off. I also know from my sister that since she has been overweight for many years, she can live healthy but it doesn't mean she will lose weight quickly...the longer you carry it, the longer it takes to take off. Anyway, the best advice I can give anyone is to live as an example. When I'm bothering to do that, life seems to go better and more smoothly.

Anyway, I could talk all day about how to get weight off. It's really simple in all actuality. It's when I get a bad attitude about life and I don't care so much that the weight starts piling on.

Hope this helps!
S. - 35, married 11 years, at-home-mom to Avery-10, Anna-7 and Lily-2

I would think there is a possibility that the two issues are related, but maybe not. I have found two great books that have answered a lot of questions for our family. The Diet Cure and The Mood Cure both by Julia Ross. You might find something in those that might be helpful. I would think you could get them at most bookstores, although I don't know what section. GL I hope your husband gets to feeling better soon!

Has your husband ever heard of OA? It's a non-profit twelve-step program to treat overeating. Several members do not eat sugar or white flour. Have a ____@____.com free to email me, too, ____@____.com.

J.,
It sounds like both you and your husband could use some ideas for quick, easy, nutritional meals. I am an independent consultant for Arbonne International. We have shakes that are high in protein, rich in vitamins, low carb, no sugar, no artificial flavors or colors, and are free of flour. My father has been using the shakes to lose weight and has seen great results. He typically makes a smoothie with yogurt, the shake mix, and frozen fruit. He mixes the smoothie for a breakfast or easy luch. The vitamins and energy that come from the shakes can help kick off a healthier eating plan and take some pressure off you to cook and prepare meals.
Take a peek at my website
www.greatskinmt.myarbonne.com

Good Luck! Rayelynn

I think Nicole is right about the ciliacs disease, it is a very difficult problem especially if flour is a staple in your life as it is in mine.
The cilia in the intestines are the problem, and if they are, then when he eats flour he is causing those nutrition receptors to inflame and even bleed and then they are unable to collect the proper food and put it where it needs to go, so he may just be packing on fats in his bodies defense of the lack of nutrition, or something. my friends son has this ans my sis in law and my niece, in women this desease causes miscarriages so it can be a very big problem. you can look it up online I don't know how to spell it either. but there are many sites that can tell you how to substitute for your flour in your breads. but you will have to make it or pay an arm and a leg for it.

Hey J., My name is J. and I work for a privet personal training studio. We have several amazing lifestyle coaches who can assist you. One even works part time at a nutritional counseling center. I have ALL sorts of clients, from 300+ pounds to the athletic. We custom design each program to our clients individual needs and it all include nutrition and not just basic nutrition. I'd love to invite you and your husband in for a free consultation and one hour work out with us. There is absolutely no pressure to buy a package or high intense sales pitch, I do not have a sales team because what we do really sell's it's self. I would love to show you just different we are and how we can help you really make a lifestyle change that will keep you an your husband healthy for life. If your interested call me at ###-###-#### Again there is no obligation to buy, your session is FREE!

My friend's husband has these issues. YOU need to take care of yourself because she started cooking for her family without flour to help and she ended up with an eating disorder because her body needs flour.

Another friend of mine is glucose intolerant (cannot eat flour). We have loved being social with her but it got old when she was always in the bathroom before she was diagnosed with this problem. But, guess what? It is amazing...look on the websites to find restaurants to eat out at. She can go to Sizzler, Pei Wei, another chain like Cafe Rio and others.

At home, she holds out her steak or chicken and marinates the rest. It's hard because, as you know, she had to give up sauces. She also loves fish (orange ruoughy, salmon) and microwaves it when her kids and family might eat casseroles.

One thing about my girlfriend with this problem...her stomach is healing and she feels great. She doesn't gain much but she started to work out and feels healthier and stronger.

Good luck!!!

We sound like we could be in the same boat!! Except that my husband can tolerate the "flour" issue. But he is overweight as well. I try to prepare things that are healthy and nutritious but he has no concept of "portion size and calories" and he is just plain addicted to "Food" so I have to find a way to reduce the amount of calories he is eating and get him to "exercise" more both of which he isn't motivated other than to say "I'm the only one that can help him" which I'm beginning to think isn't the case -- because when I try to enlighten him about these things he could care less.

He's not a bad guy, and I really love him, but I'm in the same boat with you there. good luck.

I recommend your husband go to the doctor and ask to be tested for celiac disease. If your doctor doesn't know much about it ask to be referred to a specialist who does. There are blood tests that can be done. Celiac is a genetic disease and may be auto immune related. The symptoms are varied and many people can be asymptomatic for years. I would guess the two issues are related - but an expert will know for sure. Good luck!

For your husband's weight I would not set up the appointment. It is his issue, even if it affects everyone else. He has to make the committment and the changes, you can't do it for him and if he is waiting for you to do it that is just another excuse for not doing it. He is an adult and has to take responsibility for his problem. You can help by making healthy choices available but he has to take them, if he is eating things that make him ill he has to stop doing it and you can help by making other things available but he has to do it.

My husband went on the south beach diet for cholesterol issues and lost about 40 lbs. in 4 months. It takes a lot of cooking, though. One of their main things is whole grains, so I looked for alternatives to white flour. Bean flour works very well. Simply put the smallest white beans you can find into you wheat grinder. I keep the flour in a freezer bag and use it to thicken things. It doesn't work to make bread, because it has no gluten, but makes excellent chicken gravy! I have lots of flourless, pretty quick recipes that mostly fit the south beach diet on a blog: www.howifeedmyfamily.blogspot.com. Hope this helps!

Hi J.
I am quite familiar with Celiac's (gluten-intolerance). The inability to process wheat, barley, oats and spelt. Sounds like the weight and bathroom visits your husband is dealing with could very well be this disease. Since my own discovery and learning all I can about my problem - I have been able to lose over 100 pounds in the last 5 years and have my ENERGY BACK! In fact, statistically, more than 1 in every 50 people in the USA have this disorder and may not even know.
I would suggest your whole family try a gluten free MONTH. It's simple to prepare meals if you shop the parimeters of the grocery store. (Even those gluten free snacks have lots of calories!)
For an easy dinner... Try serving 4 - 6 oz. lean protein (cook a chicken in the oven for 50 minutes at 350 and remove skin prior to serving), add two fistfuls of steamed vegetables, 1/4 cup of prepared rice (it's gluten free - other grains too!), and some fruit for dessert (no more than 1 cup). As soon as you take the chicken out of the oven, you are sitting down to eat in less than 15 minutes! No gravys to prepare! Check labels on spices for additives.
Here's a great website with tons of information on recipes and more: http://www.celiac.com
Feel free to contact me for support. I am in the Denver area... there are Celiac support groups in most every major city in the nation nowadays though.
Best wishes! Learn all you can - be patient and kind. I'll pray that you make adjustments to your lifestyle so you can get more sleep.

I'm going to echo the comments on Celiac and say that if he hasn't been tested, please do it soon! With celiac family members I have watched those with severe reactions and those with mild reactions. My poor father waded through years of tests before someone finally thought to test for this and lo and behold, they finally figured it out about 5yrs ago. There has been a dramatic improvement! His worst issues came in the form of his throat finally starting to swell closed when his body decided it was overloaded. There were many times he was in the hospital because suddenly he struggled to breath. Only after it was correctly diagnosed did we find out that there are a number of cancers that can be exacerbated by repeated exposure to gluten when you have this allergy.

When you ask about testing, I would suggest you ask for the biopsy as opposed to the simple blood test. It gives much more accurate results as to what is going on in there! GL!

he could have Ciliac's Disease (SP?), which is a gluten intolerance. I love nutrition and health and would love to help, but he will only do the weight loss thing if he wants to. (I mean really wants to!) His health is in major jeopardy if he is 100 lbs over weight. But only he can find that motivation. He gains weight because he doesn't work a plan that he could live with for the rest of his life. That is why all the diets fail. He has to change his life! Also, no amount of working out will make a difference if his eating habits are destructive. Buy food from the store that have whole grains, not Enriched bleached flour. Good luck! Feel free to contact me if you need info. Also there are health alternatives and easy recipes if you need them.

J.,
Have you tried a gulten free diet. You can find frozen meals that are gulten free at Vitamine Cottage. They also have soups to take for lunches that can be warmed in the microwave.
My thought is (and I might be wrong) he is under a lot of stress from all that is going on in your life that has a tendency to help gain weight and also he is not able to degest anything so his body thinks he is straving it.
Does anyone in the family have Clyach(SP) desease? The intestines don't absorb gulten and the person straves even though they are eating. Just a few thoughts and I hope they help.
C. B
My husband had bariatric surgery last year and has lost over 120# Dr. Micheal Synder is excellent! But he needs to get the other stuff under control.

Hi J.,

I am not sure what to do about the white flour thing. It may not be that, but some kind of dough conditioner they use as well. I would say, if you can't make it yourself, try some bakeries or bread from health food stores. How long have you not been cooking compared to what is bothering him? Sometimes an elimination diet can help rat out the bad foods. It may be irritable bowel syndrome, which my husband has. His trigger is certain kinds of fats, but there can be many different ones.

As to the weight loss: the class will be most helpful, as support and accountability are important. People are adults who need to 'just do it', but many studies have shown that people maintain healthy changes better with outside help. Two other important factors need to be _strict_ accounting of calories in and calories out. If you truly want to change things, realize that lifetime habits take a while and are accomplished through self examination and change and is a long process. It's more than just losing weight, it's gaining a healthy lifestyle attitude, and there are a number of stats that are affected: blood pressure, blood sugar, cholesterol, body fat/lean ratio.

For indoor exercise, get your husband an MP3 player then head on over to audible.com for audio books. I think I can honestly say, even the walking and running I did outside might not have happened without me wanting to listen to that next chapter. My brain has to be thinking all the time too.

One other thing: strength training at least 3 times a week will make sure the weight he is losing is fat, not muscle and will increase his metabolism.

I did not want to get diabetes like my dad, and if I didn't get my BP under control I was going to have to go on medication. I lost 70 lbs and have maintained it 2 years now. Except that I went low fat, increased my protein intake slightly (because I was weight training as well) and decreased calorie intake I have not had any special diet.

PS: Celiac disease probably would have been worse with whole wheat. But getting him evaluated for his recent troubles alone is a good idea.

J. S. -
My 9yr. old daughter and I were recently diagnosed with Celiac disease so we have had to find foods that are wheat and gluten free. We can't eat crackers, bread, noodles etc. either. I didn't realize how much we relied on the convenience of prepackaged foods until we couldn't have them anymore. It is a major pain because now I have to make EVERYTHING from scratch, including sending lunches for my daughter to school because nearly everything they serve has wheat or gluten in it. My kids both have immune deficiencies and other medical issues so I can relate to your stress and lack of time. My son had five different specialists he was seeing regularly by the time he was four years old. I know it is hard, and I wish you all the best with your baby.
Has your husband been checked for food allergies, or specifically celiac disease? It wreaks havoc with your digestive system and can cause all kinds of other problems. I have seen a vast improvement in my daughter and many of my own symptoms and we have only been on a wheat and gluten free diet for 5 weeks. Not everyone has problem with all of the items they tell you to avoid, and we didn't exhibit hardly any of the classic symptoms, but when we tried the diet it made a difference.It may be something to check into. If that isn't the problem I hope you figure out what it is soon.

It sounds like he needs a nutritional cleanse. Isagenix is the world leader in Nutritional Cleansing. It cleanses impurities out of the cells in our bodies. There's an 8 minute video about it on www.isagenix.com. It's called "Are You Toxic" and it tells you why "dieting" doesn't work, it tells you why so many people are suffering from health challenges these days, and why our bodies want to hold onto weight. I've also got a very interesting audio by a gastroenterologist who talks about this issue. If you are interested in that I'd love to send it. Just drop me a line and I'll email it to you. ____@____.com

I totally understand the need for fast and easy meals, since your hubby is having problems you might want to try the organic section of your grocery store. Mine has packaged meals where they use whole grain flours etc. It's more expensive but considering the alternative I'm sure its worth it.

Hi,
I can't speak to the white flour issue, as I don't have any experience with that, HOWEVER, if he is trying to lose weight, whole grain flours can help. I am doing Weight Watchers (I am just in the program, not a sales person!), and have lost about 7 lbs in the last month. It is based on "points"--each food is assigned a point value, and you are allotted a certain number of points per day. You can eat what you want, but higher point choices are less healthy things, and if you waste all your points on junk, you are left hungry for the day, so it encourages you to make healthy choices when you eat. On the flip side, however, it doesn't rule out treats if you are really craving something, or if you are going to an event where you know it will be hard to eat well. As far as the flour, whole grain products are lower points on Weight Watchers, so that will probably help steer him in the right direction. It is easy to follow, and your husband can do it online if he does not want to go to the meetings. Exercise is hard during the winter, so I have been using a video. Honestly, though, I haven't been exercising like I should be, and I am still losing weight. I have heard it is easier for men to lose weight, so I bet he will lose weight quickly, once he really sets his mind to it. Good luck. The first step is for him to WANT to lose weight, so if he is interested in the process, that is a great start!