Keeping Daughter at Healthy Weight

Keep her active. My son has never been heavy or pudgy but I believe in staying fit and healthy. I go to the gym and workout, although my son isn't allowed on the equipment due to his age he can play basketball and walk the track. I always take him with me and he has to either walk to play basketball while I work out. When weather is nice and not too hot or too cold we always walk the neighborhood. I do yoga, stretching, etc. by DVD so I have him join me in those as well.

You need to find a physical activity that she will enjoy whether it's dancing, archery, horse back ridding, golf, anything to get you moving. Then of course change you eating habbits. Very few treats a week. Make sunday your treat day or something and make cookies and that's it. More veggies and fruits.

Just a tip; I have been having my daughter drink a full glass of water before dinner. If feels like she needs more food/seconds I have her drink a second glass. She rarely drinks the second class saying she is still hungry. I don't know if she doesn't want to finish the class of water or is full. Either way she is deciding she has had enough. So it doesn't have to be food to fill her up.

Some of the biggest causes of weight-gain for children comes in the form of boxed, canned, and frozen foods. If you want to help slim her down make sure her diet, and your family's diet is made up of 50% fruits/veggies, 25% whole wheat pasta, brown rice, quinoa, bulger wheat, cous-cous, etc. and the rest mostly protein (chicken & fish), with a little fats.

Oh- and as far as portion control- start serving dinner on the salad plates. Most of our perception of satiety comes from being able to "clean" our plates- and start having her drink a glass of cold water before her meals. Most kids don't know the difference between hunger and thirst. It will take a week or so for your minds/bodies to adjust the change in food volume, but I assure you the change can be made and no one will die of hunger while you're making the change. =D Stick to it and don't give up.

I would suggest reading Cereal Killer- Alan Watson

I think it will give you some clear concise information on the dangers and pitfalls of food marketing and the reality of what the product is and does to our bodies as it pertains to our health.

Good luck with your daughter!

Mom this is coming from someone who grew up overweight...even if she hasn't told you she is being teased for weight at some point she has. Make this more about getting her active and the whole family more healthy never make it about weight. I require my kids to choose at least one sport at a time. If your finances don't allow for every kid to do this, there are free sports such as running clubs and others you have to look fo them. I then also require "family time" at least 3 bike rides, long walks, family tennis games(at a local park), backyard football, soccer per week. This not only promotes activity but family time. I am no jock, just because she is a girly girl doesn't mean she can't move and sweat and get out of breath a couple of times a week. As far as diet move the family toward planning healthy meals together so they will feel invested and eat them. Instead of paying for things that are highly processed with alot of ingredients opt for simple, quick and closer to what nature grew. This eliminates alot of higher calorie, higher glycemic index foods. Add water, remove juice and pop from the house. No one person is singled out and the more solid a person feels with their family, security is not a factor in weight gain. The more fit they become, the more secure with friends they will be eliminating another stress that keeps weight on. You will set her up with an amazing set of tools for a happier adulthood and that is our job as parents. Keep in mind Dance and Gymnastics are very girly and require alot of energy to do them so they are great to give a try. Good luck, it's all a careful balance.

A.,
You don't say how old she is, but sometimes girls do get a little pudgy just before they hit puberty; and then outgrow it as the enter adolescence. Perfectly normal. The best thing to do is to model healthy eating habits as a family, and try to get active. Does she like bike riding? Roller blading or ice skating? If team sports are not her thing, then how about the martial arts? Self-defense skills are great for kids. Dance? Let her try different activities to find something she loves.

I wouldn't make an issue of her size, but approach it as a family effort to make everyone healthier.

And if she is hungry a lot and eating more, it may be her body is just preparing for a growth spurt. Keep the options healthy -- fruit, yogurt, veggies. And don't deprive her of occasional treats like ice cream and cake. That'll just make her want them even more.

Whenever possible, choose whole grains over white flour products. I've found that when I eat brown rice or pasta made with whole wheat flour, you get filled up a lot faster and are satisfied with less.

Avoid sugar as much as possible. I'm not saying don't eat sugar but just really try to limit it because it really is addictive. One thing you and your daughter can do to satisfy your sweet tooth and need for chocolate is eating 1 square of dark chocolate (super healthy!) after lunch and dinner each day. I read that Giada DiLaurentis does this to keep her sweet tooth at bay and she looks great!

Take a walk after dinner and maybe start up a yoga practice (there are some really great videos on the market now days). The walking will help you burn calories and yoga is great for increasing your strength and flexibility. Or maybe the two of you can start going to the gym together or take some kind of fitness class together -- tennis or zumba possibly.

These are just some of the things you can try. I'm sure the other members will also have some really great ideas.

Wishing you and your daughter all the best.

I agree with finding her an activity. Tap, ballet, something to get her moving. Is there something you could maybe do together, a line dancing or belly dancing class or something? Our community rec center offers a bunch of different classes during the year. And never letting her have candy or cake is just going to make her hide it.

My husband's mom used to make them all healthier treats at halloween, carob candy, and then trade them after they went trick or treating, due to one brother who couldnt have the sugar. Another thing I've heard of is letting them binge on as much as they want that night, then throwing the rest out (or sending it to to work with your husband to share with coworkers).

What great answers! I wholeheartedly agree with the water suggestions as well as the whole grains. Fiber is great for helping you feel full. In addition to drinking water before dinner, you could have fresh veggies as an "appetizer". It's really easy to just grab a bag of ready to eat baby carrots out of the fridge while you're making dinner. Then, if your family wants to snack, a healthy one is right there.

Your daughter is lucky to have you for a mom!

I agree with the tip about the glass of water. Often, when dehydrated, we feel hungry and tired before feeling thirsty and thus tend to eat an extra snack or overeat at meal time. The glass of water fills the stomach and remove this feeling of needing to eat.
This advise from a "get in shape" book helped me a lot. When you feel hungry and need a snack at a random time, drink a glass of water first.

Also, they sell online a variety of "eat-well" plates for adults and children. These plates have dividers for veggies/fruits (1/2), proteins (1/4) and grains (1/4) with sometimes a small circle in the middle for the fat. As a baby, my son was offered one with pirates but we never used it. You can get this kind of plates for the entire family. It will help with portion control and balanced diet and educate everybody about nutrition. Remind them that their stomach is the size of their fist.
And, as you already do, don't focus on your daughter, but on the family's well-being.

My daughter just had her well visit and her doc said she needs to watch her weight. Not because she is chubby, but because she noticed that her "frame" has started to change and puberty is starting. My child id VERY active--dancing 2xweek, tennis 5xweek, track 2 seasons, golf, and she also does the Wii and play basketball, rides her bike at home. She is not a computer, video games, tv kid. I was surprised when they weighed her that she had gained 12 pounds in a year! I think that's alot since she only grew 1.75 inches. She does NOT look chubby at all and the doc was surprised by the amount. She doesn't like juice except for cranberry & apple (freshly squeezed) and has never drank soda. She eats fruit, veggies, yogurt, organic cereal, oatmeal and eggs as well as red meat 1-2x per week, pasta (whole grain/wheat/semolina)1x week, chicken a few times per week and also turkey. She takes a liquid mutli-vitamin. She drinks 1-2 glasses of 2% milk per day and LOTS of water. She has snacks at the occasional birthday party or catered affair or at her VBS. I do allow her to have an Italian ice or ice cream cone a few times during the summer. I got her to start eating broccoli, cauli, brussel sprouts, and spinach by melting cheese over it and slowing over a few weeks would "run out of cheese" LOL! She now even loves to eat sauteed/roasted garlic cloves in her pasta. It is very important to set an example at your own dinner table and if eating out --make wise selections. Try not to eat fried foods and try to eliminate white flour foods. You will see a difference. Best of luck!!!

How old is your daughter? Has the doctor said she is overweight? Could she just have a different body type than the rest of the family. Looking back on your previous questions, I'm thinking she's a tween.

Kids do fill out before they grow taller. Could this be happening with her. My granddaughter is now 10. She has always been a very thin child but she is beginning to fill out by getting wider and thicker. Because she was so thin earlier I could think she was getting to fat but because she's still growing taller, none of us are concerned.

I'm glad you're wanting to eat healthier foods. This is good for the whole family. and getting into having consistent exercise is also great for the whole family. I would not focus on this one child.

I also agree with drinking a glass of water before eating. Have the whole family do that. This will help to fill up her stomach. It won't hurt anyone else. When we are in the habit of over eating we stretch out our stomach which causes us to continue to eat more. You might talk with her, if the doctor suggests she needs to eat less, about the way her digestion system works.

My daughter was obese at 10 or so. We took a nutrition class at the hospital. The focus was not on losing weight. It was on learning which foods are best for us and how much of what we need to eat. ie the food pyramid. This could help the whole family, even if you're the only one who takes the class.

I'm impressed with the numerous great ideas. Both exercise and a healthy diet are wonderful for the whole family. At home is where we begin the habits that last a lifetime.

Maybe she is stress eating, or eating her emotions. It could be emotional instead of physical.

Hi A.,

I have a tween boy who was skinny and last year started getting chubby around the middle. I just had a discussion with him, honestly told him that he is gaining wait (and he admitted that he noticed and was bothered by it but did not know what to do about it). We had a big talk and still have (not once) about eating, exersising, and drinking sugar loaded drinks.
My son is interested in the health science so he knows a lot on the subject already. We had discussions on the food groups (carbs., proteins, fats) how they are metabolised, how they are stored in the body, what foods do they come from. I also made sure he understands how important it is to have a musscle mass - it will help to burn fat even when he sleeps (by increasing the natural matabolism) and hence he needs to exercise to build muscles and to increase the heart rate (to burn the fat he already has).
So, here is what we have now: He swims 2Xweek for 1 hour, does push ups and bench presses with dad outside every other day, has fencing once a week where he has to be on the move for 2 hours. I go to the pool with him, he swims with the instructor and I just swim for health but he likes that he is not alone. He wants to add tennis in the future, again he wants me to do it with him.
Food wise: Limiting carbs (it is easy because he never liked breads and pastas to begin with), I do not limit meats/fish/cheese/milk group products at all. Eating more salads, fruits, veggies. Watering down the dips, salad dressings and drinks (if he cannot resist them).
For example, last night he had before dinner sliced green apple with cubed cheese snack. For dinner very big filet of baked cod with a spoon of mashed potatoes, salad with watered down dressing (I just dilute the dressing with water).
I believe that the kid needs to know what is going on and to be on board with it and to want to change - that's the key to success. My son had lost his spare tire in 5 months! I am sure your daughter will want to look and feel better and to have more energy. It also helps a lot if she is doing it with someone, you, dad or a sibling. I lost 20 lb myself together with my son implementing the same strategies. My next goal is to start running.

The key points again: build muscle mass, limit carbs, train your heart. That is simple for a kid to understand and then brake her habits into these 3 categories and see where she needs and willing to change.

Good luck.

I read Dr. Oz's book "YOU on a Diet" that was so informational about nutrition. It is not a diet fad book, but an educational tool about nutrition that is explained in an amusing and easy to understand way. If you want to start learning about nutrition, I would suggest this for sure.

For snacking - how about having lots of fruit/veggies in the fridge that they can just reach in and grab easily. Wash grapes, strawberries, other berries, carrots and put them in a bowl in the fridge. If they are hungry they can just reach in a grab a handful of whatever you have in there - no matter what time of day they want to snack.

How about family bike rides or roller skates to keep her moving? If she doesn't like sports how about karate or dance? There are more "girly" sports like tennis - if she's a girly-girl she may like the skirts she gets to wear, or even gymnastics.