Kindergarten - to Test or Not to Test

A.,

No guilt is necessary here. If she is ready, send her if the school will let you, she has nothing to loose, but may have something substantial to gain. If it makes you feel better, statistically, she is at a true advantage by being the youngest in her grade. If, heaven forbid, she has an unforeseen disablity (being smart does not eliminate that possilbity) by going to school next year, she makes her chances of being given effective, targeted intervention in a timely manner much more likely.

M.

I would wait. I was a younger kid for my class. Did great academically! Socially and emotionally I was fine until Jr/High School. It was fine, but harder for me (and the parents) as I learned through those experiences - boys, driving, friends, drama. I would have been more self confident and prepared to handle those challenges if I'd waited a year. My daughter is in the same situation and I'm holding her back... You can always find external challenges academically/intellectually, but you can't speed up one's emotional or social development. What do you have to lose by waiting? Good luck!

I guess I am just of the old school. If they make the cut off send them to Kindergarten. If they don't- then they wait until the following year. The cut off ages are there for a reason. If the cut off age was September 24th, then I would say send her.

My son's birthday is one month too late to be tested, and wow, how I wish he could have gone early! My second son is 4 now, and I think he'd do great in kindergarten now. That said, they are almost definitely gifted, and well ahead of their age group. But you say your daughter is pretty smart and mature, I say go for it!

My birthday is late in the summer, so I started pretty young. I was 17 when I graduated from high school, and had my birthday right before I headed for college. I never realized that I was younger than most of my classmates until graduation, and by then it was no big deal.

Sorry, I don't have any personal experience with the actual testing or making the decision, but I thought I'd tell you about my school experience!

P.S. about the first response with the cutoff dates: each school district has different cut off dates. They're arbitrary, not at all based on child development research or anything. I mean, a child born on August 31st is not magically so much more mature than his neighbor who was born on September 1! Sure, there's a reason for the cut off date--they have to draw a line somewhere. But it's not one-size-fits-all or there wouldn't be the option to test!

My son was very smart and mature for his age and was also just a few months too young to start our 6 year old kindergarten. He was in an excellent home day care/preschool and we chose to keep him there for one more season and start him in kindergarten at age 6.

I have to say, it worked out wonderfully. If anything, he was just more prepared for kindergarten and it set him up for success and he had a great time there. Remember that just because your daughter COULD go now- why SHOULD she?

If you feel like she is just being babysat in preschool and isn't learning anything, that is something to consider. Is she bored at preschool? Complaining to you or misbehaving or acting out? Are there other kids her age there for her to play with?

Also, consider how socially mature she is. My son was very socially mature, but being in preschool the extra year allowed him to really enjoy being one of the 'bigs' at the school and helping the 'littles'! It gave him a lot of pride and self-confidence to be one of the big kids and taught him to be very patient and kind with younger children.

Kids are just absorbing knowledge EVERYWHERE at that age! I am sure you read to your daughter and do all sorts of things with her at home as well as in preschool. Who is to say she would get more educationally out of kindergarten starting early than she does with you???

As a full time working mom, I TREASURE the few early years I was able to stay home with my son. Don't be so eager to start the school merry-go-round- it will last for years! Enjoy your girl and let her stay little a while longer is my advice!

My 4th child had a bday on sept.16th. We had her tested and said she was ready. She did great and is very advanced for her age. Every child is unique. You may want to have her tested and see what feedback you receive. You could also send her and if she isnt ready just repeat kindergarten again, but maybe at a different one. Good luck.

Send her. If, for some reason, it doesn't go well, she can always do a second year of Kindergarten. But I really doubt there will be a need for it. I have an October birthday (so does my husband) and we both started Kinder as 4 year olds. I think I turned out pretty well - graduated from an Ivy League, always had friends. My husband is a business owner, always had plenty of friends too. My older daughter has a mid-September birthday. She started Kinder at 4, and now (end of 2nd grade) is the top child in her class academically. Participates in sports, social butterfly. My youngest is turning 5 in a few weeks and just graduated from Kinder. She was promoted mid-year because the Pre-K teacher said she was ready, and bored in preschool. She just scored at the 95% in all areas of state testing. It doesn't appear to me that being in Kindergarten as a 4 year old has scarred her for life or anything.

So... in our family of 4, all of us started Kindergarten at 4 years old, and things have been fine. I don't see the benefit in holding kids back unless you have a solid reason to do so. One side does not fit all, and if your child is ready, then send her. Having a birthday 23 days late is not a great reason to hold a child back who is ready!

Hi A.- It sounds like you already know this but honestly nothing anyone else did with their children is going to help you in your decision. It is entirely dependant on the specific child. Both my girls are young for their grades, my oldest (now in 6th) has an Oct. 11th birthday and started kinder at 4 years old. She is an excellent student, has always read above grade level, does well socially and has always "belonged" in the grade she was in at the time. I cannot imagine her in 5th grade right now, she is just too mature. She is also a tall girl, which was a consideration back in kinder and seems to matter now that all the girls are taller than the boys! You need to really think about your daughter, her personality, her temperment. You know the answer as do the people who have been teaching and caring for her. I can tell you that unlike what many think she will not automatically be ahead if you hold her back nor will she be more immature than her peers later on if she's put in now. Most of the time kids rise to the level of what's happening around them as long as they are emotionally ready for the environment. Good luck, I'm sure you'll make the right decision.

dont just think of this year.. this has implications for all of her school years...

being the youngest, smallest and possibly least mature person in her class. the last to be able to drive, to date,,, also going away to college at 17 and turing 18 after she gets there.. ,my friend stated her daughter early she did fine.. but went to college young and immature,, lots of things were challenging.. wait let her play for another year.. what is the big hurry.

I have not read the other responses you received, so I apologize if anything is repeated. I have been on both sides of this situation as a parent and as a student. My birthday is November 23rd and my parents decided to put me in Kindergarten early. I never really noticed any difference in elementary school. I was always a straight A student, had good friends, etc. But when I entered High School, I noticed a few things socially. I was always embarrassed to tell people how old I was. I was 13 years old in High School! Also, all of my friends were driving before I was. Overall though, I always did well academically and had friends. So there was nothing that would really give me pause about putting my own child in early.

My daughter was born September 27th. Because (like me) she is the oldest child and grandchild in the family, she has always been around adults. She is very intelligent and mature for her age. I was considering putting her in Kindergarten early, but the district I was in at the time no longer had an early testing program due to budget cuts. So they basically made that decision for me! I had to wait until this year to put her in Kindergarten. She will now be one of the oldest children in her class. After putting her in Preschool though, I almost think this gives her an advantage. She was pretty far ahead of the other students in her preschool class who were all younger than she was.

I guess what I am saying is that putting your child in early (if she is ready) will be fine. But if she has to wait another year, that would be fine too! I know... not a whole lot of help, huh? :)

I would go for it. I have a mid September birthday myself and I started the year I turned 5. I was 17 when I began my freshman year of college. I never had any problems being one of the younger kids in class.

Both of my kids have summer birthdays (one in late June, one in mid-July) and they started right on time.. but still are some of the youngest kids in their classes. But we have had NO age related or size related issues whatsoever. And I don't anticipate any.

Especially if your daughter is very bright and enjoys school/academic type activities.. (mine loved (loves) to read) I would go ahead. If she is a more tom-boyish type and prefers to be outside climbing trees and riding her bike and digging in the yard all day, rather than books and painting and coloring inside-type activites, then I might hold off until next year.

My experience so far is that almost all the kids in both my daughters classes are older, most families are choosing to hold back. My daughter is a late July birthday and she by far the youngest in her class. I would think into the future, junior high and high school...all the boys will be so much older than your daughter??? There have been studies done that the older kids in class are much more inclined to be leaders and have higher grades. My advice is to think more long-term.

I would only send my child early if she was soooo brilliant that it was obvious that she was way too advanced for kids her own age. It would have to be painfully obvious that she just did not fit in with the younger kids and needed to be around older children.

If she is fitting in with kids her age but is on the "top" end of the class I would keep her right there. If once in school she is advanced they might talk to you about her skipping a grade or possibly entering a gifted program but to start her early and have it basically move her from top of her class with younger kids to "average" with older kids, what is the advantage?

Good luck with your decision,
K.

My youngest has a late October birthday. The cutoff for us was Oct.1, if I remember correctly. We had her tested for early admission and she passed easily, as we knew she would. Her pre-school teachers told me she'd be super bored with another year of pre-school. As it was, she was already the tallest, most mature, most academically proficient kid in her class. I was also a year early my whole life, so having gone through it myself, I had absolutely no problem sending her a year early, too. I never had problems and so far, neither has she. She's in 2nd now, going into 3rd. I really don't foresee any problems going forward, either. She truly is just like all the other kids in her class. But when I look at the current 1st graders (where she should be chronologically), they seem really little and young compared to her. She'd really stand out (not in a good way) if we'd held her back. I'm glad we started her early, holding her back would have been the absolute wrong choice for us.

This isn't an easy decision, especially because it really is an individual decision. As a teacher and parent, I am a proponent of waiting to enter Kindergarten. An extra year of maturity can be a gift, especially when your daughter reaches the middle, high school, and college years. In the dark ages when I went to school, the cut of was December. Even though I had a November birthday, my parents chose to wait and by the time I reached college I realized that it was the best thing they ever did for me. I had a cousin with an October birthday that had somehow went to K early, and she had a really hard time when she got to college due to lack of maturity. On the flip side, I had a second cousin with a November birthday who went to K at 4 years old and was successful throughout her entire school career.

It's an individual choice. Waiting won't hurt, and the extra year could help. However, you are the one who knows your child best and your instincts in this situation will serve her best. Good luck to you and your family.

Not sure what to tell you mommy wise when it comes to this situation.

I was one of those that was put through the school system at an early age.... I had no problems going to school early.

They did not give me that option with my daughter so she went through the head start program twice and she is doing awesome in school. She is popular and extremely out going. She also does not feel bad about having to wait to start Kindergarten. She will graduate at 18 but she is ready for just about anything life throws her way.

Although, what they teach in Kindergarten now is alot different than what they taught when I was that age.... I think if you have a daughter that you and others think is ready for Kindergarten then put her in.

Cut offs are in place for a reason - and they vary all over the country. I think sometimes we need to accept that - not challenge it.

My oldest has a September bday and the cut off was Aug. 31st - she is a very smart girl - but I accepted that she would go to school the next year - she is at the end of 7th grade now and a straight A+ student. We moved cross-country when she was a first grader - to a state where the cut off age was Dec 31st - so had she started school there - she would have been a grade level higher - we even had the option to move her ahead b/c of her maturity and academics when she was in 2nd grade - but we chose not to. I am so glad we didn't b/c we moved back to our original state where she is in the middle of the age range.

While we were in the state with the Dec 31st cut off - my daughter with a November bday would have started Kindergarden at age 4 - but we moved before she started - and again, had to wait that extra year.

I am in NO hurry for my kids to whiz through school and leave home. School and life are so much more than academics!! I want my kids to have good life skills, positive self esteem, maturity, non-academic interesets. Also, the harsh reality of middle school - it takes a mature kid to come out of that with their self esteem intact - I can't imagine being on the young side! It is worse than I even remember from my childhood!

There are so many reasons for and against starting early/late. In the end - only you can know what is right for your child.

I posted this answer before, but wanted you to give it some thought - not from an academic or even maturity standpoint, but from a standpoint of what her friends will be going through that she will possibly be 18-24 months younger than in age, but in the same grade. Here is my earlier post:

If she's doing well academically and is on par with maturity, the only thing you need to make sure you do is have the "talks" with her a bit earlier than you might have anticipated. My daughter is an Aug birthday and the youngest in her class.

By 2nd grade there were girls & boys who had been late starters/held back so she had just turned 7 and they were turning 9 in Oct/Nov. Big difference in shows they watch, books they read (as far as content, not academic level) etc. Both 9 yo girls were shaving, wore bras and one of the girls even got her period in the 2nd grade! while my daughter had only been 7 for a couple of months.

The same thing will happen with driving and dating - she will be 14 and may have friends that can drive and/or date. She may be 13 in a class with a boy who is turning 15. Lots of girls in high school start being sexually active around 15-16 and your daughter will be 13 and may have these girls as friends and/or classmates.

Is that a reason to hold her back? I don't think so, but it did make me more "on my game" so to speak with making sure she has info I want her to have BEFORE she learns it first hand from friends who are experiencing it. I just do a TON of talking and listening so that she really understands that just because her friends are doing it, it might not be the right decision for her. And then I just hold my breath and pray!!!!!!!

I have a boy that was young (Mid November) for the class. I wanted him challenged academically and believed that way they have less time to get into trouble.i enrolled him in pre-k on the condtion that i had him tested to move up. i was told after the testing that i'd be crazy not to move him up. so i didn't make the desicion alone.the class was full of wild boys and he fit right in. he was smart, tall, social and athletic. he just graduated from high school (straight A's and MVP in all his sports). there were times where he did miss out on things because of his age, but no biggies( wouldn't take dance lessons---"I'm not going to dance with girls", or "I'm not going to that college" when they were recruiting him but then thinking that college he rejected is his dream college 2 years later. So, Because of his age though he opted to do a 5th year of high school (post graduate) at a prestigious broarding school to play his sport at his choice of college. and he was very glad to have that opportunity.
My daughter who is also young technically for the class happened to be in a class with younger girls. It does depend on the class at that young age. Later on in high school, even when she was finally old enough to drive and most of her friends had been driving for quite some time, she was too busy with her activities to care.
My youngest who is the perfect age for his class (March) still has kids 1 year older than himself in high school.
Bottom line, it depends on the kid and the kids in the class. I do believe that they relate better socially if they are use to kids of different ages. It helps with maturity.
Hard to tell in kindergarten if your child is going to be a star athlete but then can always do an extra year before college (and still get college credits).
PS it doesn't hurt to have her tested and ask a professional for their recommendation.
Good luck. If you change your mind you can always change schools too.

Cut off ages vary from city to city, and some schools won't test a child to move them in if they miss the cut off. If your daughter is mature enough and has already bee in preschool/day care, she has an advantage in that she understands structure. Personally, both my daughters are on the older end of their classes and it has worked well for them, although my younger daughter is very bright and was a bit bored with kindergarten this year. I do have a friend whose daughter missed the cut off in her town by 2 HOURS and they would not budge. It was very hard for her to be a full year older then her entire class. If they offer the testing option, I'd let her take it and see how she does. Don't be offended if they think she's not ready though, it just means she gets a little more time to grow up!!

If she is ready go for it! There are many younger kids in kindergarten and many states say as long as they 5 by the end of the year then they can go.
I liked my daughter being the oldest in the class- she was almost 6 when she started because her B-day is in Jan.
Especially since she was already in Pre-K she will be fine, I would hate for her to be bored in Pre-K again!
Good Luck!
M.

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I have decided to hold our son back. Older kids usually do better and have better success in school than the youngest. I would recommend extreme caution before making your daughter the youngest by far in her class.

I was asking that same question when our daughter was a that age. It took lot of thought. One day "SHE" came to me an said "I want to go to BIG GIRLschool momma". So there I was faced with the answer. BUT was I ready? After talking it over with the teachers and hubby and dealing with the feeling of that I have to let her grow up. I let her get tested and she blew everyone away!! They said that she could go into 1 st grade. I said hold up kindergarten is good enough. She is 14 now and she is a straight A GT student and in the grade that she is too be in and VERY happy.
Well I hope this helps you and your daughter will grow up to make you proud as BOTH of daughters do me.

One factor is being mature enough because if they are not, they will have trouble socially. If the professionals think she is ready and you say she is mature for her age, then she will be fine. If you wait and she knows the Kindergarten curriculum already, she will be bored. If she is mature for her age and you wait 1 year, than she will be more mature than the other students and have trouble socially as well.

I think what's the hurry? They grow up to fast the way it is. Waiting to send the extra year will only help her improve and fine tune any skills that aren't perfect. I waited until my daughter was 6 to send her and I can tell you she does wonderful in school. She just finished second grade but is reading at a sixth grade level and also helps her sister who is in fifth grade with math homework. I owe it to her preschool cause they kept challenging her with homework and reading.

A.,

I have sons born July 22 and Oct 11 (with the school cut-off Sept 30). They have both been tested as gifted, but I've been happy with my decision to send them to kindergarten when they were six or almost 6. I was told that my son born in July was ready to go to KG at 5, but I decided against it. Both of them have had learning issues that we couldn't have known about prior to KG despite being gifted and I think that the extra year of maturity was helpful for them. The only reason I would make a different choice is if I thought my child was going to be very bored at home. Good Luck!

L. C.

as someone who was in this situation as a child (my bday is sept 19), I started school when I was 4 and turned 5 in kindergarten. it was fine for me. my peers were always slightly older and doing things like getting their license before me, but really it was not a big deal. if you feel like your daughter is ready, go for it.