Late Talkers Anyone??

Updated on February 02, 2014
N.J. asks from Redlands, CA
19 answers

When should I REALLY worry?? I have 2 older boys and was never really concerned with their language development as I am with my 3rd little guy. Pediatrician wants to wait until he's two to refer to outside services...I'm starting to think of making another appointment and push harder for a referral now.

He is 21 months old and says, hi, eye, hot and ball! We have heard mama, dada, and bye bye once! He also has a weird word he uses for our dog...sounds nothing like her name or 'dog'....but he uses it all the time for her. Lots of jargon so he is very vocal just no articulate words. We are now hitting our terrible twos and I'm sure it's only intensified by the fact we are not understanding him. We watch and do signs everyday and he only uses 2 of the signs consistently :(.

I know we aren't supposed to compare but my oldest wasnt really vocal at this age either, but he used over 50 signs and had at least 10 words so I wasn't too worried. My 2nd was way ahead of his peers, with knowing all the letters of the alphabet by 18 months and was counting to 10!! I obviously know every childs development rate is different, so when are we suppose to really be concerned??

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So What Happened?

Thank You all for the for the feedback so much more insightful than what Inwas gathering from 'Google'. To answer some of your questions: he is given ample opportunities to 'talk'--altho' in the earlier months (around the 9-12mths) I did find myself being that 'wonderful' Mom who knew everything he wanted and needed. I have since made myself and husband very conscious of giving hima chance to use his words!! Right now he tries....but it generally just leads to him walking and pointing to what he wants or a full blown tantrum! He hasn't had any chronic ear infections--he's only had two so far. I don't notice any obvious hearing issues, but I will definitely check it out! His his receptive language is fantastic--I'm just shocked at how far he's lagging behind with the word count. I guess I kind of expected with the third, he'd be on target in that area. I will research the EI programs around here, I was under the impression it needed to be referred via the Pediatrician, I didn't know it was a self referral!!

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S.Z.

answers from Reno on

I did not speak at all until I was 3.

My oldest didn't say anything until she thought it would come out perfect - she hated baby talk. So, even when she spoke, at first it was with very few words.

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M.K.

answers from Los Angeles on

My son didn't say his first real word (besides mamma and dadda) until he was 18 months. He did babble and make a lot of sounds, though, so no one was really worried. He had maybe a dozen words by the age of two, then his language exploded. At six, he now has an extraordinary vocabulary.

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S.G.

answers from Grand Forks on

My younger son was a late talker, which worried me because my older son was a pretty early talker. My younger son had chronic ear infections, and the fluid built up behind his ear drum was affecting his ability to hear. He had tubes put in right before he turned three, and within weeks of the surgery he had an explosion of language. Before the surgery he had only a few words, and often made sounds instead of words (like quack quack, bow wow, choo choo...) He had speech therapy until he went to kindergarten, but by the time he was four he was pretty much speaking at his age level. Have you asked for a hearing test?

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K.M.

answers from Kansas City on

Yes, he is behind. No, I would not wait until 24 months to get intervention. Two of my three boys were late talkers. Each state has a FREE Early Intervention program for kids birth-36 months. I think it is called 'Early Start' in CA. Just call the number and self referral. They will send a team of 2 or 3 to your home to evaluate your son in several areas (in Kansas they did 5 areas: fine motor, gross motor, cognitive, self help, and speech). They will determine if your son needs Early Intervention Services. If he does qualify, services are free (no matter how much $$ you make).

Both of my kids who were late talkers now have better vocabularies than their peers AND never.stop.talking!!!!!!

Don't wait!! We started at 18 months with both (pediatrician felt you need 18 words by 18 months and we weren't even close!)

Oh, and they will give your son a hearing test. Our oldest had 100% fluid blockage in one ear and 50% in the other. Kids with this would typically have ear infections and then get tubes. He never had one ear infection, but they did put in tubes. That helped. Our other son did not have these problems.

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A.J.

answers from Williamsport on

I'm a firm believer that boys aren't late talkers at two. I just have too many friends with sons who talked much later and cousins who talked much later. My son barely said Mama at 2. My gut told me his comprehension and everything was fine, he understood everything anyone said, but he wasn't ready to talk. Somewhere near 3, maybe even a bit after, it all came out in full sentences, puns, creative sentence structures: Viola! He's now six and a great reader and talker. It never hurts to be cautious, but you should not be "worried" at 21 months. My first daughter spoke in full sentences at 18 months. My youngest daughter was quite a late talker, sometime closer to three....kids are all so different. All three were awesome talkers by 4.

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A.A.

answers from Tulsa on

My son's pediatrician referred us to a hearing test and then speech therapy when that was normal at 18 months (he wants them to have at least 8 words they use consistently at that age). By the time the hearing test was finished and ST was approved we ended up only going 3 times before he was discharged. He's now 2.5 and is a chatterbox. I take the "better early than late approach" and would get him started now rather than starting the process at 2. My nephew's ped waited until 2 and by the time they had been through the same process (he needed tubes, so that was an additional wait) he was closer to 3 and still very hard to understand. Most likely he'll be fine, so try not to stress (or compare him to the others), but it doesn't hurt to get a second opinion.

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D.D.

answers from Pittsburgh on

EI is self referral. I self-referred one of my kids at 18 months for speech. Ped wasn't concerned yet, but my child did qualify for services when he was screened. Right around 22 months, his speech exploded. Would that have happened without the help of the speech therapist? Maybe, but I'll never really know. All in all, I was glad I took the initiative early and got him screened and services starting at 18 months. 21 months is definitely not too early.

And really - if you call now, it will be a month before they actually get to your house to do the screen. And if he qualifies, it will be another few weeks to get the therapist set up. So he's going to basically be 2 before you get started anyway.

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S.T.

answers from New York on

I don't think my daughter strung more than 2 or 3 words together until she was 2 1/2. Her pre-school teacher assured me that by the time she got to kindergarten she's be talking. She was.

At 17 now she doesn't stop talking...

It will happen - it could be he doesnt' need to talk - he's got 2 older brothers who fill all that quiet!

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M.H.

answers from Minneapolis on

My youngest didn't talk other than "oh oh" and "da da" until 23 months and then he started talking in sentences and using big words all at once. He was sick with a fever the week he started talking and he literally went from "oh oh" to "I need Tylenol." Now he's 14 and he doesn't shut up! He's our talker! I did call the pediatrician back then and was told that children with older siblings often talk later than first or only children because their siblings talk for them. Based on my experience I would tend to go with what your pediatrician is telling you. But you know your child best and if you have other concerns about his development or health then I would call back.

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M.O.

answers from New York on

Honestly, I think your best bet would be to put part of your question to the pediatrician: Okay, WHY is it better to wait until age 2? What are the risks of evaluating or intervening too soon?

That said, the way you're describing your son doesn't really raise red flags for me. Maybe, at most, little yellow flags of concern, but not big red danger flags of alarm. Speech acquisition occurs through multiple neural pathways, and the speed or lack thereof can just as often be a sign of a particular learning style or personality type as of a global delay.

My own son had a mild speech delay. He had a relatively limited vocabulary and spoke very indistinctly until age 2 1/2. Didn't start speaking in full sentences until his 3rd birthday, at which point the talking started and hasn't stopped yet. Today he's in a g/t program and tests at the 99th percentile in all academic subjects, though he also has some notable delays. All of which is to say, I've been there. I've had those fears. In my son's individual case, they ultimately didn't pan out.

So, I guess my recommendation is to follow up with the pediatrician and try to gain a better understanding of his/her rationale. Be prepared that there may ultimately be something diagnosable going on, but also, at the same time, remind yourself that Albert Einstein reportedly didn't say a word until age 4.

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G.♣.

answers from Springfield on

I was a bit insistent and had my son referred at 18 months. The speech therapist did an eval and made notes. She didn't recommend therapy at that time but gave me some ideas and had me come back at 24 months. Same thing again, and he didn't start therapy until he was 2 1/2.

He will be 5 soon. He still gets services through the school district. He's doing great! So glad we did this. While he didn't start therapy for almost a year, I'm still glad we did it. He was evaluated at 18 months and at 2 years, so there is a record of how he was doing, the progress he was making, etc.

Having the evlas, even without therapy at first, helped me see how he was doing and it ruled out serious problems. He could have scored lower on the evals and received services, so knowing he didn't made me feel better about it.

Personally, I would insist on a referral now. He might not need therapy right away (there often isn't too much that they can do at that age, but sometimes there is), but it gives you a starting point. It identifies or rules out serious problems. It's a benchmark to help in the future.

Go for it.

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J.S.

answers from Richland on

Does he have to talk to get his needs filled? I ask because my first, I read some stupid article that said a good mom anticipates her child's needs. Damn I was a good mom! unfortunately he didn't talk until he was two and a half and had to compete with his little sister.

Once he had to talk to meet his needs he caught up quick and by three and a half was like any other kid his age. My second was talking like a five year old by the time she was one and a half. Aren't kids fun? Don't compare them it will drive you nuts!

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J.B.

answers from Boston on

The rule for my pedi was that if my kids didn't say 10 words by their 2nd birthday, there was reason for concern. Outside of that, nothing to worry about. My second son had exactly 10 words a couple of days before he turned 2. He didn't have an overnight language explosion, but at some point around at 2.5, things just clicked. He's almost 10 now and hasn't stopped talking since (like really, it's a MAJOR problem for him and drives everyone around him insane).

My youngest was also very leisurely in his pace and was close to 3 by the time he started talking much (probably because his older brother wouldn't shut up so he couldn't get a word in edgewise). When he was 3.5 and his older brother was in Kindergarten, he suddenly started chatting up a storm because he actually had some time and space and quiet for himself.

I think that as long as he can understand you, there is no reason for concern, especially if your pedi suggest waiting. Try to relax.

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R.K.

answers from Boston on

1. He's a late talker.
2. He's frustrated.
3. He's not effectively using signs to relieve his frustration to communicate adequately.

Poor, sweet, baby!!!

Given your description, it would seem appropriate and kind to ask for a free evaluaiton from yor early education professionals. If he suddenly acquires a vocabulary, no problem! If not, you will be on the road to getting him services. Either way, it's better than the old "wait and see". All my best.

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P.K.

answers from New York on

Since he has several words, my bet would be at around two or so, he will take off. Back in the old days, we never made ourself crazy about these things. Everyone spoke when they were ready. Some earlier some much later.
Do what your gut tells you to do. Cannot hurt to get an evaluation. Call our school district to see what you need to do for an eval.

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M.C.

answers from Washington DC on

My brother was the youngest, and was a slow to talk kid. Turns out that there wasn't a problem, he just didn't have much to say. He is a very laid back person and just goes with it.

One day my Dad stayed home with him, he ____@____.com Mom got home she asked my brother how his day was. 'Well, I'm pretty hungry, Dad didn't give me lunch' ... (Mom shoots killer look at Dad) 'What?'
he repeats the statement.

Dad was shocked. They had been sitting in the living room, in view of the kitchen and fridge. My brother had never told my Dad he was hungry, and my Dad who was not used to being home during the day, and usually skips lunch, didn't think to ask.

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F.B.

answers from New York on

Ours was a bilingual home, and our boy was a late talker. Receptive language was fine, but not speaking more than a dozen words or so at 2 y.o. We had an eval and then speech services for a year. Now a non stop chatter box in both languages.

Just a word of suggestion- Find out what the benchmarks are for your early eval program. In our case, it was 15-18, and 18-24 months. suppose the target for 18-24 months was 10-25 words, but the target for 24+ months was 20-50 words. Had we had him tested at one day before his birthday, with his 12 words, he would have been on the low end of normal, but 1 day after his second birthday, he was below normal range and in need of services.

Something to keep in mind.

Best,
F. B.

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M.M.

answers from New London on

I'm inclined to agree with your pediatrician. BUT there could be other things...could it maybe be a hearing thing?...do you ever notice any delayed response (aside from the typical behavior of testing limits)?

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B.L.

answers from Los Angeles on

I haven't read all the responses but thought I'd tell you my two cents. I have a brother who was a late talker and he ended fine. He's actually brilliant. I have a son who is a late talker and he did not end up fine. We waited until he was 3 to get services. He's 11 now and still struggles to get out words when he is in noisy or stressful situations. It took years to get him to somewhat normal speech.

Through all I've been with my son, the one thing I know is that mother's intuition is the best barometer for judging if there is a problem. The pediatrician is going by stats, not the individual case of your son. I think back and if I had ignored the pediatrician and gotten my son services early, maybe everything would have been easier. Research shows over and over that early intervention is way more effective. So get him assessed and get him speech if he needs it. If he qualifies, the local regional center might provide it. It's not going to hurt him. My son thought it was fun. If your son's speech suddenly develops on its own, no harm done.

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