Moms with Cancer

E.-

I'm not currently in treatment, but I was diagnosed with cancer 19 months ago (Hodgkins Lymphoma) when my daughter was 10 weeks old, and the day before my son's 2nd birthday. It was 2 days before my 33rd birthday, so I was a little older.

I don't know much about your specific cancer, and I am SO sorry you are having to deal with it.
You're welcome to reach out to me anytime (send me a message through mamapedia, and I'll send my contact info) if you need support or have questions, in general.

There's also an organization called Imerman Angels (imermanangels.org) that keeps a database of fighters and survivors and will match you as closely as possible to someone else going through what you're experiencing (age, kids, cancer type and stage). I'll be calling a Mom tomorrow with Hodgkins so she has someone to relate to.

Most importantly, I hope you have a good Oncologist who specializes in your cancer. If not, see if there's anyone in your local area.

You will need the support of your family and friends. You will find you have friends you never knew about, and you'll find that people you thought were friends can't deal with it and abandon you. But, you will get through this and will be a better Mom, friend, daughter, and person in the end.

BEST WISHES and BIG HUGS!

There is a book called "Mommy without Hair? My World Turned Upside Down" by Selene Benitone that is for children's ages 3-10. She was a neighbor of mine and has a tremendous spirit.
Here is a link to her website:
http://mommywithhair.squarespace.com/
My prayers are with you.

Hi E.,
I am so sorry to hear about this tough time you're facing. I don't have any personal experience or advice to offer, but I have two friends who are breast cancer survivors who I could ask. You might also look into Cancer Treatment Centers of America (www.cancercenter.com).

Also, I just got an email yesterday that says:

"Cleaning for a Reason

If you know any woman currently undergoing Chemo, please pass the word to her that there is a cleaning service that provides FREE housecleaning - 1 time per month for 4 months while she is in treatment.

All she has to do is sign up and have her doctor fax a note confirming the treatment. Cleaning for a Reason will have a participating maid service in her zip code area arrange for the service. http://www.cleaningforareason.org/

Please pass this information on to bless a woman going through Breast Cancer treatment. This organization serves the entire USA and currently has 547 partners to help these women. It's our job to pass the word and let them know that there are people out there that care. Be a blessing to someone and pass this information along."

I checked it out on snopes.com and confirmed that the info is accurate. I know it's not much, but maybe it could be of some practical help for you. Best wishes to you and your family!

My kids were 4 and 6 when I was diagnosed with breast cancer this past summer. I've made it through chemo and 2 surgeries and just started radiation. My kids have had a pretty normal life through all of it because we chose to keep it that way. We explained things to them in a way they could understand and encouraged questions. We tried to keep the routine that they were used to as much as we could. I'm very glad that we never did the kids "support group" through the hospital as i think that would've scared them too much. We planned the normal weekend trips for my good weeks and my husband did some of the events with them that we normally do as a family. The biggest change for them was my losing my hair. Even though the diagnosis is like having a bomb dropped on you, you need to decide what is best for you individually and as a family and try and get through it. You'll have a lot of decisions thrown at you so it's important to feel like you have control over some part of your life. Take one day or one treatment at a time and good luck!!!

I'm sorry to hear about your illness. I'm not familiar with rhabdomysarcoma, but I would recommend that you learn everything you can about it. There are many resources on the internet and I'm sure you can find some that are specific to your condition. I would also recommend that you get a second opinion. The second doctor may simply confirm what your first doctor said, or he/she may give you a different perspective or even different treatment options.

I have chronic leukemia. Many with my condition are able to avoid chemo and I haven't needed it so far. But my first doctor told me I would be dead within a year if I didn't have chemo. That was four years ago next month. My current doctor is wonderful. She shares lab results with me and discusses my options. Even when I had a crisis last summer she respected my right to be involved in my own treatment if I wished. And she doesn't give me doom and gloom scenarios, as the first doctor did.

This is a scary time for you. Do some activities you find enjoyable and allow others to take care of you. I'm sure you'll find many helping hands. Stay positive. And, again, find out as much as you can about your condition. Knowledge really is power.

E.,
I'm so sorry you're dealing with cancer! You are in my prayers.

Sincerely,
N.