My 4 Year Old Grandaughter Cries When I Leave Her

She must love you very much-and it is a time where everyone is adjusting to a new baby-there must be some stress-hope the situation improves very soon! The children are little for such a short time! All the best!

even if your daughter lived in a fancy house in a nice neighborhood with activities all the livelong day, your granddaughter would probably cry when you left her. obviously the two of you have a wonderful bond. it's very nice.
but don't feed into it. your daughter is her mother and that's the primary bond that must be respected. be calm and strong and loving and don't angst and worry and let your granddaughter see you wavering.
khairete
S.

It's unfortunate, but she is your daughters daughter and you have to let it be. It's nice you get to have her on the wknds though... and I'm sure you will always have a strong bond with your granddaughter since she's practically been raised by you. Give your daughter a chance to make a life, and enjoy being a regular grandmother. Continue to encourage your granddaughter to love her own home for now, spoil her with books and games that she can stay occupied with until your wknd visits.
But do give your daughter a chance to make it all work, don't let her feel guilty that her daughter is not happy right now, change is always a little difficult at first.... hopefully time will make it all smooth out.

You are not letting her down, she is now able to live with her parents. This is her life, and they will need to learn how to live together.

You do sound like a wonderful grandmother, but please remember, you are the Grand mother, not her mother. Consider checking out or purchasing this book about Audrey Penn "I love you all day".. There are also more titles that discuss, a child holding a kiss, until they see you again..

In Austin there are a ton of things that are free, including swimming pools and wading pools. One parent could stay home with the infant while the other takes your grandchild swimming.

The different libraries around town have events, story times and free movie nights. Again one parent could stay home while the other takes the child to the library.

Right now the Zilker Park Summer Musical is "The Sound of Music".. It is free. Just take blankets and a picnic for dinner. There is a slight charge for parking.. It is so much fun.. Your grand daughter may fall asleep before it ends, but at least her parents will be able to get out of the house.

In the morning it is not as hot and in the afternoon. We used to run some errands or go to the park in the morning.. come home, have lunch, take a nap and then in the afternoon go swimming..

They just need to get into the swing of doing things.

They should consider applying with the city.. There are all sorts of jobs available at all levels.. and they come with great benefits.

They can look on line for information.

Acknowledge and accept that this is a big transition for your granddaughter, all she knows is living with you. Encourage her to love her new home and family and reassure her that you will continue to see her each weekend. When she cries and says she wants to stay with you gently remind her that she now lives with her mother, stepfather and new sibling, not with you anymore. Give her something of yours to "hold" and keep safe for you, and tell her when she misses you to hold it and she will feel closer to you. If she sees that you appear happy (put on a good front for her sake) with her situation it will go a long way towards her accepting it. You're not letting her down by taking her home, it's where she now lives.

Give your daughter the opportunity, support and encouragement to be a mother to your granddaughter. Suggest she enroll your granddaughter in preschool, Head Start is a free program for low income families, she should look into it now to see if her daughter qualifies for the new year that starts in the fall. If your granddaughter starts going to school she will develop new interests and not dwell so much on her new living arrangement.

you have been her stable rock for a long time and it will be hard for her to adjust. but she will adjust. its a giant change for a 4 year old. maybe offer to take her once a week (outside of the weekends) to do something special with her.

My mom had me when she was 16. I spent a LOT of time with my grandma (who passed away in 2001...I miss her very much).

It's wonderful that you are able to give such support to your daughter, as my grandmother did for my mom. I'm sure that my grandmother sometimes felt like you do, that my mom couldn't give the same things to me that she could....but she still said "That's HER child and I will respect that."

It doesn't matter if you can give more stuff, classes, etc. And of course she'll cry when she has to go home. She loves you. And while your relationship with your grandchild is special, there is one thing you can't give: You aren't her mother.

So you need to support your daughter even more. Talk her up to your grandchild and make sure that you are always excited WITH her to see mama when she goes home. Never say anything negative, and try to embrace your role in this situation.

And, most of all, PRAY. Pray for your daughter's family. Pray for their success. Pray for yourself, that you accept that happy families can come from poverty. Pray for wisdom.

Can you plan stuff and ask to come and pick her up for a picknick in the park? Yes it's hot but there's still shady places. You could take her out for ice cream or a frozen yogurt. She could come and have a craft afternoon at your place. I think the week is really long for her, some activities to break it up might be just the thing, especially if mommy is busy taking take of a newborn, there is no energy left for her. I can't imagine your daughter minding a few outings, she's probably glad not to have a bored little girl on her hands.

Welcome to my world! I remember when my grandsons were living with my daughter and her friend in a single wide trailer. The boys would come stay with me every weekend and every Sunday as soon as they realized they were going home. would start crying and telling me they didn't want to go. It was the hardest thing! They were stuck inside all day and night and they were miserable!

There is really nothing you can do but take her every weekend and try to talk up her mom and stepfather to her. Point out anything positive you can think of. I would also send my little guys a card in the mail occasionally - it brightened up their day!

I know how hard it is to leave a crying child when you understand and sympathize with why they're unhappy and especially when you know you can make them happy.

I still have that to a certain extent with my GD. She lives with me, but I encourage her to spend time with her parents. She doesn't mind most of the time but sometimes, like this week, she really didn't want to go. She hasn't seen her mom or dad for 3 weeks - it was time for a visit so I made her go. Have done nothing but think about her since I dropped her off Saturday night. I know when I pick her up she'll be fine, but I will worry all week!

I think this is normal behavior for a four year old. My kids cry when I leave them with there grand parents then they cry when there grand parents leave. I would call your daughter about fifteen mins after you drop her off and see if your grandaughter has calmed down. Usually its only a few mins and my kids are back to normal. They cry when I leave to go to the grocery store but they are over it after a few mins.