Need Help with My 6 Month Old That Doesn't Sleep

Updated on February 23, 2008
S.L. asks from Castle Rock, CO
23 answers

My 6 month old eats every 4 hours around the clock. That means she wakes up and will not stay asleep unless she is fed. How do I drop the feeding at night?

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So What Happened?

Thank you to everyone and all your advice. Here is the update with some stuff I forgot. My daughter is 18 pounds and just 6 months. She is very healthy and I truly believe that she does not need the calories during the middle of the night. I give her many opportunities during the day to eat as much as she wants. She has chosen not to eat rice cereal or any other first foods that I have offered her. She 5 out of 6 bottles drinks 6.5 ounces. She is getting enough milk. My daughter nursed for 3 months and then didn't want to nurse anymore. (My first wouldn't take a bottle AT ALL so these feedings were all very new to me) I believe that I have created her patterns along with her dependency for her pacifier. I know now that it is up to me as hard as it is to undo the patterens I created for her. I have decided to give her baby food when she wants a bottle and then offer her a bottle and also to decrease her ounces for her 2-3am feeding. For me when my babies were born I did everything I could to keep them happy...You don't get a book on how to. I rocked them to sleep I offered pacifiers, swings and whether they ended up as bad habits or not, as long as they were happy I felt like a good mom. Now it is up to me to change the habits I created. A rested mommy is a happy mommy.

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S.M.

answers from Fort Collins on

I would try a bottle at night just before bed; maybe with a little cereal in it. It'll help her stay full longer!

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K.W.

answers from Casper on

Have you tried to give cereal. I did that with my boys when they were babies. and it worked well.
K. 32yrs and 2 kids
wyoming

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E.H.

answers from Provo on

Dow much does your baby weigh? If your baby is under weight and growing sufficiently s/he might need the feeding. I'm sure some responses will suggest to cry it out at night-but before you try sleep training I would suggest making sure your baby is healthy and does not have any medical conditions. I thought about sleep training my son b/c he wasn't sleeping well, but it turned out that he has a medical condition that keeps him from sleeping well. Good luck!!

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H.G.

answers from Denver on

Dana,
I will preface my response by saying that I do not subscribe to many of the ways that are popular in our society. I believe in feeding my child whenever she is hungry. Breastmilk does not take long to digest- therefore baby needs to eat more frequently, including at night. Babies are growing at a tremendous rate and they need nutrition far more frequently than we, as adults do. I believe that your baby is communicating a need and not trying to manipulate you. It is our job to meet their needs, not decide for her when it is convenient for us to feed her, comfort her and otherwise meet her needs. I find it incredibly disrespectful to our babies to feed them on our schedule, to let them cry it out and ignore their most basic needs. If you are desiring more sleep (and what new parent isn't?) perhaps you can consider cosleeping. Your daughter can nurse herself back to sleep, and you hardly even need to wake up at all.
We work so hard to love, nurture and care for our babies, what do we think ignoring their cries communicates to our children? A child who is left to cry it out may "learn" to fall asleep on their own (studies show that their ceasing to cry is actually a form of withdrawal, causing an extreme amount of stress to the baby- this is proven!) but they are told by our actions (or lack of actions) that they cannot trust us, that we will not listen to them and their needs will not be met. Babies are deeply affected by these messages- please consider what you want to communicate to your baby and act in ways that support that. It may be inconvenient for you to feed her at night, but it is a genuine need that she has right now. It doesn't last forever, but the implications of not meeting these needs can last a lifetime.
H. Gaitten

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J.D.

answers from Denver on

Hi Dana-

You didn't say what she's eating now--if she's moved on to solids or not. When she wakes, is she just eating to put herself to sleep or does she seem actually hungry? It's possible she actually isn't getting enough food during the day and does need a few more feedings. How is she growing? Many doctors do suggest some rice cereal at night, but not in the bottle, so I'd ask your pediatrician about that. Also keep in mind, sleeping through the night at six months is about 5 hours. It's also possible it's just habit. Like some of the others, I highly recommend the No Cry Sleep Solution. Go with your instinct of what your baby needs. Hang in there!

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T.V.

answers from Denver on

By now your baby is getting enough calories during the day that she doesn't need to eat during the night. She is only waking up out of habbit. The only way to get her to stop is to let her cry it out. One of the best books that helped me with my children (a 3 year old and 4 week old) is called Baby Wise. I know how hard it is to let your child cry, but it actually bothers us more than it bothers them. We let our 3 year old cry it out at 8 weeks old, and she only did it for a couple of nights before she learned to sleep thru the night. Good Luck!

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K.S.

answers from Provo on

During the day try to go as long as you can without feeding her. Then when you feel like the time is right go and feed her. Try also feeding her some rice cereal before bed. My second one was like that so when he was 6 mo. old I started to do that and he slept for six hours straight. So it is all about how you feel about it. Do what you feel is right. You are her mother. Good luck.

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J.S.

answers from Provo on

I really like the book by Elizabeth Pantley called The No Cry Sleep Solution. It gives you a way to stop feeding them at night without letting them cry it out. It worked really well for my son.

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M.W.

answers from Denver on

Is your child drinking formula or breastmilk? Have you tried putting rice cereal in the bottle and giving the baby more ounces? All of my kids needed more just to sleep through the night. I started putting rice cereal in their last bottle before bed at 3 months old and that's when they all started sleeping through the night. Just get a fast flow nipple and warm the milk and put some rice cereal in the milk. It really sounds like you need the rest.

I am a 36 year old mother of a 10 year old, 2 year old and 1 year old. Let me know what happens or if your not sure.

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K.D.

answers from Denver on

I think solids would help. Also, maybe spacing the daytime feedings a bit more if you can will help her eat more and learn to stay fuller for a longer time. I really don't remember how often my kids were eating at that age. Sorry.

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J.S.

answers from Colorado Springs on

I was giving my daughter some rice cereal in her formula before bed time and it helped a lot. Although she did not have issues sleeping thru the night, she did go thru a period where she wanted to be up at midnight. I know some say not to give your child cereal in their formula but at six months it is fine. I also would not do it on every feeding, I would only do it at the night time feeding. It worked for us. Just a side note, if you do the cereal; try beech nut cereal. You can buy it at Kings Soopers or Albertsons and it seemed to be better on her tummy than gerber. I think it is brown rice and it also has some other nutrients to help with sleeping at night. Let me know if any of this helps!

J. S

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V.F.

answers from Denver on

Dana,

You might try introducing cereal at bedtime feeding. Start with a soupy mixture, then gradually increase to normal cereal. I do not mean corn flakes, the baby cereal.

V. F

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N.P.

answers from Salt Lake City on

My baby was the exact same way at 6 months. He is now 11 months old, and I never dropped the one feeding at night...and we are just fine. I know that you are supposed to and that by this time they don't need food at night...but I just bagged that advice. My doctor said that once they get old enough to hold a bottle, you can put a bottle of water in their crib with them. I don't know.. I just stopped worrying about it because it was too hard to drop the bottle! I wanted to sleep! It was easier to give him a bottle, than to fight it. I guess it doesn't help that I'm pregnant again... I saw that you have 2 kids under 2! That will be me pretty soon! It's nice to know I won't be alone. :)

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H.H.

answers from Billings on

Have you started baby foods yet? Sometimes as they begin to eat more solid like foods they slow down in eating formula/breast milk.

My son who is 5 months practical sleeps through the night one feeding, except when he is in a growth spurt. For example, last night I feel like I didn't sleep much, closer to feeding every two hours.

I often play with my son quite a bit before he goes to bed so he is good and tired. Then I feed him one last time before going to bed. That seemed to slow down on the feedings. Sometimes he nurses in clusters in the evening so he doesn't wake as much in the night. I think he likes his sleep too. So if you baby is hungry even though they just ate, maybe they are trying to pack it in as well so they don't have to wake as much. Best of luck.

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S.H.

answers from Boise on

Dana,
Sometimes it helps to have someone say that its ok to lay comfortably in your warm bed while your baby is crying in their crib. But it is ok. I have three children and I had a pediatrician I totally trusted who told me to give my baby (my first at the time) a bottle of water in the middle of the night for a couple nights. Then, I would know it is not "food" he wants, but help training his body to sleep for longer periods of time. After a few days, I stopped giving him the bottle of water and let him cry. After 4 days, he was sleeping and so were we! We have done this 3 times and it works! The trick is not letting the guilt keep you up or keep you from progress! Good luck!

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B.

answers from Boise on

I made sure that all of my babies got fed very regularly until they were sleeping through the night. I mean feeding them every 1 1/2-2 hours all day, then they ended up getting the food that they "needed" during the day, and didn't need anything at night. My 8 month old just started going 2 hours between feedings- but I know some can go a little longer and be good sleepers. He still gets 7 feedings in a day.
Well, it's worked great with all 3 of my kids. Sleeping well at night took a higher priority than having more free time during the day, for me. 2 kids slept 8+ hours a night by 7 weeks, and the last one started sleeping through the night by 11 weeks. They've all been very consistent since then. (It's not just genetics either- we adopted our first.)
So, if yours is eating every 4 hours around the clock, then she's getting 6 feedings in a day. Just figure out when she should wake up and when she should go to bed, then work in at least 5-6 feedings just during the day. Starting rice cereal with her could help that transition of course too.
Good luck!

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A.T.

answers from Provo on

I agree with Hannah's message to you. Your baby might be eating this frequently because she is fighting off a bug and needs thge extra immunity, or may be going through a growth spurt. Babies kinow what they need and when we try to chalenge that it usually does more harm than good.

If you would like more advice on infant sleep, I recommend www.askdrsears.com His advice is compassionate, thorough, and backed by actual research and experience.

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J.A.

answers from Billings on

Unfortunately until your baby is older I do not believe there is much you can do. The baby cannot have baby food and he/she is needing this food to grow. I have been there 3 times and I hope that soon you will begin to get more sleep.

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M.M.

answers from Colorado Springs on

At 6 months, she doesn't need that much nutrition at night. She is waking because she has developed a habit. My suggestion would be to feed her more often during the day, like every 2 hours. If she then still wakes at night, you know for sure that it's not a hunger issue. Start by weaning her off one feeding each week. I like the book by Mark Weissbluth, Healthy Sleep Habits, Healthy Child.

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T.T.

answers from Denver on

Are you nursing? If so, at night she could just want the comfort. Try sending your husband in with a bottle of pumped milk and see if she is really hungry. If she is, she will take the bottle. If she doesn't take the bottle, then she probably just wants comfort. If that's the case, start sending your husband in when she wakes at night to comfort her. Try not to pick her up at first, just rub her back and assure her it's time to sleep now. If she won't settle down, pick her up for a little bit, then lay her back down. Does she take a pacifier? That might help. Otherwise, she might have to grow out of it. My daugther woke ever two hours until she was 6 or 7 months, then it was once a night for a little while, finally at about 10 months she slept all the way through the night. But try and get your baby to sleep 8 hours between feedings. Try and drop one middle of the night feeding and then feed her when she wakes at 4 or 5 am. I hope this helps. I know how hard it is to lose sleep!

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A.F.

answers from Salt Lake City on

Though some doctors believe that sleeping through the night is purely a developmental milestone, several moms have told me that giving a baby cereal before she goes to sleep will give her something a little more substantial in her tummy and help her stay asleep longer. Good luck!

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J.F.

answers from Boston on

Eventually as your child gets older and you start introducing more solid foods she will start sleeping for longer periods during the night. If she's waking up wanting to be fed and is not running overly heavy in her weight, then keep feeding her. Her body is telling her what she needs and she won't do this forever. It seems troubling for us because we feel more ragged as parents when we are tired, but it's important not to deprive our kids of something they need for our own comfort. Have you started introducing rice cereal? 6 months is a great age to start introducing it. That tends to be more filling, although, if you're mixing it with breast milk then it will digest easier than when mixed with formula. This is better for your child so that the food isn't fermenting longer in their stomachs and their bowel movements will be easier (and nicer to change) and gas won't be a different problem that creeps up to cause distress.

Good luck!

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B.C.

answers from Salt Lake City on

Our pediatrician suggested just ignoring our 4 mo old at night and he would eventually just go back to sleep... depends on what you're comfortable with! If you can stand listening to the screaming (and if it doesn't wake up your other child) you might try it.

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