Need Some Suggestions for Almost 9Yr Old Bout Puberty

Updated on May 05, 2008
T.C. asks from Independence, MO
32 answers

Ok I have a daugher who is about to turn 9 and I know puberty is just around the corner. I didnt start my period till I was 16 BUT she takes after my husband so I need to ask my MIL how old her girls were. Anyways someone told me about some book that girls can read but I cant remember what it was. Anyone have any suggestions

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C.R.

answers from St. Louis on

The book is The Care & Keeping of YOU - The Body Book for Girls. i bought it from American Girl Store
States author is Valorie Lee Schaefer
It is a good book to go through together.
C.

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T.T.

answers from Lawrence on

I will just let you know that girls are starting younger and younger these days. this is a hard subject to talk to adolescences about. just be trueful, don't suger coat it. I know that you only want her to know certain things but it is a good thing to tell her ask her if she has questions. I have a 7 year old boy who we are dealing with puberty and for me it was uncomfortable for me to talk to him about his because he is a boy so my husband talks to him about it. my husband said that the man of the household will talk to the boys and the woman(aka Me) of the household will talk to the girls. I can tell you that my dad had to talk to me about it because he was a single father and he sat down with me and we had the birds and bees talk and it was the best story my dad ever told me. he took me shopping for my first bra, underwear, and other things. did he mind yes, but he had to. there was no one else in his life but me. I do have siblings they lived with my mom. I lived with my dad because my mom and I well we did not get along. we lived more than 800 miles from her so she could not do this. he was a dad that knew that he had to take me places and do things he did not want to but he did. I thank him to this dad that he helped me through all of those things because having to learn them on my own well I don't think that would have been good. I think I would have been into lots of trouble and more.

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L.E.

answers from Kansas City on

"American Girl" has a wonderful book that guides them thru puberty. I let my daughter read it and then we dicsussed anything she wanted. It was easier than me trying to remember everything I needed to cover, so it helped me too.
Good luck!!

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K.C.

answers from Columbia on

Judy Bloom book called, Are you there God, It's Me, Margaret...

Great book about reaching puberty....

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C.F.

answers from St. Louis on

The Care & Keeping of You: The Body Book for Girls (American Girl Library) (Paperback)

This is the book I got for my now 11 1/2 year old daughter. I gave it to her when she was 10. She hasn't started her period yet, but we had a "talk" about it when she was 10. I am a nurse and I think this book is great. It was referred to me.

Chris

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A.G.

answers from St. Louis on

Hi T., If you would like some easier reading for your daughter, Judy Blume wrote a fiction book in 1970 called "Are you there God? It's me, Margaret" Here is a synopsis from Wikipedia:

' "Are you there God? It's me, Margaret" is typically categorized as a novel for young adults, about a preteen girl in sixth grade who grew up with no religion. Margaret has one Christian and one Jewish parent, and the novel explores her quest for a single religion. Margaret also confronts many other pre-teen issues, such as buying her first bra, having her first period, coping with belted sanitary napkins (changed to adhesive sanitary pads for the 2006 edition of the book), jealousy towards another girl who has developed a womanly figure earlier than other girls, liking boys, and whether to voice her opinion if it differs from what her girlfriends seem to believe.'

Here is the link: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Are_You_There_God%3F_It'...

I was not raised in a religious family, I read this 20 years ago and what I remember most is the feelings and realistic (although silly) thoughts she had about puberty and how to intereact with her friends and schoolmates.

I hope this helps, you can probably supplement this book with a non-fiction book for when your daughter has more detailed questions about what to expect.

~A.

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A.M.

answers from Kansas City on

I have a 9yr old daughter who I can tell is getting close to going through puberty. Another mom suggested the book "The Care and Keeping of You" it is an American Girl book and can be found just about anywhere ( I got mine at Wal Mart). This book covers everything from body odor, to acne, to breast development, periods, exercise, ect.. but all in a way that a young girl can understand. I highly recommend this book - it has helped me out tons! Good luck!

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J.N.

answers from Kansas City on

T.,

I remember my mother giving me the Judy Bloom book "Are you there god its me Margret" when I was hitting that time in my life. I'm sure there are plenty of good books out now, but in 1978 it was very comforting to read about a girl my age dealing with this major change in her life.

I think the most important thing we can do for our daughters is to teach them that this is a natural change for them. Yes, it can be messy and embarrassing, but every women on the planet goes through this change. I was raised to believe that knowledge is power and that the more information we have the easier it is to take on the challenges of this crazy world.
So, if you feel that your daughter is ready to learn about her body and puberty give her the tools and information she needs.

Best Wishes,

J. N.

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N.W.

answers from Kansas City on

T., besided the fabulous American girl "The Care and Keeping of me", I have also given my daughter the other great American Girl doll book "The Feelings Book--The Care and Keeping of your Emotions" She will get very frustrated and start crying for no reason AT ALL (PMS) and I suggest to her to go see if that book has any answers for what she was feeling. Now my daughter will turn 12 in September, and she has yet to start her period. She has begun the greasy beginings, along with other signs. Check out their website bookstore it has other very neat books.

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L.K.

answers from Kansas City on

Hi T.,

I know this isn't what you asked for and probably not helpful, but after reading everyone's posts, I'm sitting here thinking isn't anyone else concerned that 9 years old is too young for a child to be going through puberty?
At this point there's nothing anyone can to, but can I make a suggestion to anyone who may read this to do your best to eat meat and dairy that says "hormone free." I am a registered nurse and when I was in nursing school over 25 years ago, a classmate did a research project on the hormones in our food and the connection between the early onset puberty. I wasn't even married then, but filed that info in the back of my head. It's not always easy and depending on what you're getting it is a little more expensive but I try when I can. I completely understand that there are other factors that contribute like genes/DNA but there really is a connection. My daughter started last summer at age 12. ONe of her best friends here in the neighborhood started at age 9.
I guess as a mommy, it just seems a lot for their brains to handle.
PS. My daughter does have both of those American Girl books and they are VERY GOOD!

Best of luck.

Lori K

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M.T.

answers from St. Louis on

I agree with Christine. I was going to mention the same American Girl Book. My daughter at age 8 (now 14) began developing. I was so worried because of her age. I took her to a specialist and they did a thorough exam; including blood work. Unfortunately, the results came back that she was about 6 months from starting her period. I was devastated. Luckily she was about 8-1/2. I kept telling myself, 'please let her make it to age 9'. Her 9th birthday came and I was so happy. However, she ended up starting her period about a month and a half before turning 10. I think that being open with her and letting her know what was going to happen and why is huge. If you can talk to your daughter and also give her some books to read which explain the changes in teh female body and what to expect, then you are doing good.

The hardest part for my daughter was being invited to a swimming party and not being able to go because of her period. Just be sure to be comforting to her and understand the emotional time that she will go through.

I feel for any mother that has to deal with the same situation as I did. GOOD LUCK!!! If you have any questions, please don't hesitate to ask me. I completely know where you are coming from.

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K.F.

answers from Wichita on

I have a daughter who just turned 11 this last April, and I know what it's like to be the mom with a child starting puberty. It's a whole new territory. If your little girl responds well to books, and that's what you think she'll connect with more than go to the library and check out some books in the series "my body and me". But personaly I found that one on one, girl to girl talk is best. This is the time for you to form that deeper lasting friendship bond with you child. You'll always be her mother, but at the same time when it comes to things like this being able to be her girlfriend will open those lines of comunication up between you, and teach her to never be embarraced about coming to you with any questions about her body. The best absorbed info is that what comes from someone who is respected, and already knows everything (so they think). When ever my daughter gets in the mood she turns me into her gal pal, and things that I would have been so reluctant to talk about with my own mother; comes rushing out of her mouth. I love it, and I know she does too. None of her friends can beleive the things she so openly talks to me about without hesitation. If that sounds like the kind of communication you want to have with your girl; the time to start is now. A good tip would be to not be too seriouse with her, don't hold back too much, and have fun with it.

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D.H.

answers from Kansas City on

Check out your local library. I did a search on the library sight and found my daughter several good books for her to read. I don't remember all of them though, so I'm sorry about that. There are books that have been written within the last year also. You could go to the Kotex website...www.kotex.com they have a whole section of Menstrual education for girls and women. These have been helpful to my daughter. She is 11 and started the symptoms when she was 9. We were concerned that she would start when I and my mother did, at 9, but thankfully she hasn't, but it is coming. Good luck T., she'll be fine. God Bless.

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Y.I.

answers from St. Louis on

I bought my daughter a book at Bath & Bodyworks. It is really good. It is made by American Girl and really explains all the changes that will take place and about good hygeine and issues with friends etc... Im really glad I bought it for her. you should try that. Im at work and cant remeber the name but Im sure if you get on the website for Bath and Body and click on the American girl line it will be listed.

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C.M.

answers from St. Louis on

A great book is from the American Girl series. It's called "the care and keeping of you". The school nurse at my daughters school reccommended it. It's great.

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D.L.

answers from Kansas City on

Here's the book I bought for my daughter. My daughter just turned 9 in April. We went over this book a month or so ago. She was so thankful for it. I wish it was there when we were kids. My friend who is a nurse, borrowed it for her daughter as well.

The Care & Keeping of You: The Body Book for Girls (American Girl Library) by Valorie Schaefer and Norm Bendell (Paperback - Sep 1998)

I hope this helps!

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V.M.

answers from Kansas City on

Hi T.,
My daughter just turned 11 and this year in school they are learning about puberty and all the changes that happen. She came home from school yesterday with pads and deoderant. The nurse at our public school teach "Human Growth and Development" maybe you could even check with the school nurse at your school for some information. In 4th grade they start receiving information about themselves and learn about the opposite sex in 5th grade. Several girls in my daughters class have started their period this year, but not mine daughter. She said she hopes to start until next year, I started in the 6th grade, so maybe that's why. Also, check at the bookstores or google books about puberty, I'm sure there are many sources. Good luck! V.

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K.S.

answers from Kansas City on

The American Girl book is a good one. Lots of information in a non-threatening format. My 11 year old and I have been has been reading it off & on for a couple years. It's a great resource & starting point for conversations! At her recent "annual checkup/well visit", the doctor did assess her status on puberty & breast growth & looks like we have another year or more. Yeah! But those hormones are already affecting the emotions causing some roller coaster dips of tears and frustration.

Planned Parenthood also offers a wonderful class for girls about this age. You can call them or check out their website. We spent the day at the library and learned a lot about the body and all the changes and wonderful things it an do plus talked about body image and the distortions that the media puts out. good luck!

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S.G.

answers from Kansas City on

There is a book by the American Girl company that talks about you and your body.

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K.J.

answers from St. Louis on

I am sure there are a ton of books. I started 2 weeks after my 9th birthday and it was horrible, because it was in the summer. Just let her know all her options and that if it happens to come to you and the door is open. I had a friend that hid it from her mom and I had to bring her pads to school?

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D.L.

answers from Topeka on

Check at your local library, there are many choices. If you are religious, then read the books first, many of them touch on things you may not want presented at such a young age. If it helps any, your daughter's inheritant traits for puberty will not follow your husband or his family. It will follow yours somewhat but a large part will have to do with the amount of fat in her diet and her environment. But be careful, if my daughters thought I discussed their puberty with anyone(even my MIL), they would have been horrified. My girls(12 & 18) are very private and I have to be careful not to lose their trust.

Good luck,
D.

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L.B.

answers from St. Louis on

My stepdaughter's first period was at 10. She was a healthy eater and was not overweight. I heard that weight can affect the starting date. Many of her friends were around 10 too. My friends and I were closer to 12.

We had a class in 1975 and they gave us a book. It was great. It answered all the questions. No book is better than a mom bonding with her daughter. If she gets the info from you - when something is going on she will come to you. Maybe you could ask her if she wants to read it together.

Don't give to much info at first, but continually let her know that if she has any questions you will do your best to answer them. My sons were asking questions regularly.

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J.B.

answers from Kansas City on

Hi T.,
I was 14 and both my girls started at 14. But the female Dr they go to told me girls are starting earlier these days! So just be prepared for at least 13 and on! My husbands mom started at 10!! How horrible for her! She is not related to my girls though, although we have a daughter together now so our daughter might just take after her grandmother or me, who knows??
J.

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J.R.

answers from Kansas City on

I believe the book you are looking for is "Are You There God? It's Me, Margaret" by Judy Blume. My daughter read it and she enjoyed it as well as she had many questions. Good Luck.

Jo

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N.R.

answers from St. Louis on

Usborne Books has a great book about What is happening to me? They have one for girls and for boys. www.ubah.com/u2151
American Girl also has one that I saw at Walmart but the pictures were a little over the top for me. My daughter is going to be 10 this July and we really haven't talked about it. Guess that should be on our summer to do list....

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L.C.

answers from St. Louis on

T.,

My girl is 13 now but when the other girls were starting puberty several years ago I found the book called "Growing Up, It's A Girl Thing: Straight Talk about First Bras, First Periods, and Your Changing Body" by Mavis Jukes. I read it first and then she read it and then when she had questions, and there were only a couple, I knew how it was presented to her and It was easy for us to talk about. It is a simply stated book about your changing body and easy for her to understand.

She is a smaller girl and still has not made her final change into womanhood, which I am glad of, but this was the best of the 3 books I check out.

Good luck,
L.

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D.D.

answers from Kansas City on

Check out www.focusonthefamily.org
Dr. James Dobson is a child psychologist and has links to tons of helpful and appropriate Christian resources for all ages and stages.

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S.H.

answers from Kansas City on

Hi T.,

A great book we gave our daughter at that age (she is now 12) is
"The Care and Keeping of You" published by The American Girls. Here is a link to it at Amazon.com:
http://www.amazon.com/Care-Keeping-You-American-Library/d...

It got a 5 star rating. I highly recommend it because it talks about things like periods, hygiene, manners, boys, etc...

Hope that helps.

S. :)

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P.H.

answers from Wichita on

Hi T.,
I have two daughters one started puberty very young (as did I, I was wearing a training bra in 4th grade, and started my period in 6th) one was almost a sophmore in highschool before she went through it.

SOMEtimes, too much information is not only intimidating for them, but they aren't really likely to remember it all.
A humorous aside: When I started growing pubic hair I didn't know what was going on so I was pulling it out...until of course it grew back in too fast for me to keep up so I finally said something to my mother. She laughed at me, and then asked"Don't you remember me telling you that was going to happen?" I remember sorta shrugging and saying , "not really".

I guess, just hit the highlights and maybe don't get too detailed. There are some great books out there, also our school starts trips to the Halstead Health Museum around 4th and 5th grade.

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K.W.

answers from Kansas City on

I have 2 good recommendations. One is an American Girl book and is called "The Care and Keeping of You" (sorry, I couldn't underline in this program). This book is all about what young girls need to know to take care of themselves during these times. The other is called "Isn't it Amazing" and it covers a bit more. It goes into how a baby is made, etc. My daughter didn't really want to talk to me about all of this, but I could tell she was curious. I gave her the book, and told her to peruse it as she wished, and then she could come to me with any questions. It handles things in a clinically correct, but age-appropriate way.

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C.O.

answers from Kansas City on

All Amercian Girl the keeping and caring of you

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A.V.

answers from Columbia on

At 10, I read "Are you there God, It's Me Margaret" by Judy Blume. It's a fiction book so I didn't feel like I was doing homework. It's a good book but you may want to read it before handing it on to her. It's the story of a girl who is dealing with all the struggles of growing up. Includint periods, body changes, mean kids, religion, all of it. The reason I say you may want to read it is because she battles a lot with and really questions her religion. I don't want to offend anyone with the suggestion but I knew what to expect when puberty hit.

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