Parenting Books - Santee,CA

Updated on November 13, 2011
M.W. asks from Santee, CA
18 answers

I'm going to be a first time mom and have heard good and bad things about most parenting books. Any reccomendations? Some one told me the book " how to have your second child first" was a good one. I already have the baby book and know all about the
"happiest baby on the block" from working in the infant care/toy industry.

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S.W.

answers from Minneapolis on

I hated the "What to expect books" - they made pregnancy sound like a disease. The "Girlfriend's Guide" books might be funny, but much of the information included is just plain wrong.

I agree with the "Freerange kids" concept and website, but haven't read the book. "Mindful Parenting" had some concepts I really agree with.

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D.M.

answers from Detroit on

Hi M.---I'm a big fan of Dr. Sears. He and his RN wife and sons have written well over 30 books on all subjects having to do with babies and families. You could probably get an idea of what to expect at his website, www.askDrSears.com.

Good luck. D.

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G.T.

answers from Modesto on

You kind of write your own book as you go, seriously. There is such a vast amount of opinion on how to raise a child, yet none of the authors were raising YOUR child. Just ask questions as you go. Dont get your expectations so high that you worry too much about stages of development.
Spend some time at the library and scan through the chapters of books that relate to your stage and take some notes. You'll find yourself at the library a lot :)

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D.W.

answers from Gainesville on

I think it's great to read different parenting books to help with tips and tricks that you may not know or may have never heard of. It also helped me find my parenting style which is def attachment parenting. My life-saver books were Dr. Sears Baby Sleep Book, Martha Sears' breastfeeding book, The Baby Whisperer, The No-Cry Sleep Solution.

I think it's great to have a breadth of knowledge to cull from and call on. Sometimes you can be in the middle of baby "crisis" and remember some great little tip that you read that saves the day!

But the one book you clearly want to avoid is Becoming Baby Wise. The author is a quack with no medical training whatsoever but tries to tell moms to dictate when their children get to eat and sleep. Uummm....no you follow baby's lead. They only have one way of telling what they need (remember, baby only has needs not wants) and it's your job as mom and dad to provide and follow their cues to meet their needs.

Congratulations to you!

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J.G.

answers from Springfield on

Seriously, anything by Dr. Sears. I have found their books to be really helpful. I liked the "What to Expect" books. Also, if your really stressed and need a good laugh, Vicki Iovine has a few: "The Girlfriends' Guide to Pregnancy," "The Girlfriends' Guide to Surviving the First Year of Motherhood," "Girlfriends' Guide to Baby Gear," "The Girlfriends' Guide to Toddlers." She has good, helpful information, but her goal really is to make you laugh and help you to see that whatever you're going through is totally normal.

Congratulations!

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A.P.

answers from Janesville-Beloit on

Just to add to what others have said, I too think the Dr. Sears books are very good. Like any books, you have to just take what you find helpful (for example, they are very into co-sleeping and that isn't something that works for us) but for the most part their books are informative and reassuring. I also find What to Expect The First Year to be helfpul as a reference. There are parts of Baby 411 that I really like, although I find their thoughts on sleep (they promote letting babies at 6 months CIO without even checking on them) to be a bit harsh. I think somebody else mentioned this, but be cautious of books such as Babywise, that promote feeding your child on a schedule when they are very young, rather than on demand. There actually have been cases of infants ending up malnourished and having "failure to thrive" because of parents feeding according to these types of schedules. Good luck and best wishes!

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M.F.

answers from Phoenix on

I'm not a huge fan of parenting books in general, am more of a common sense type with a focus on traditional developmental principles, not what's popular this week/month/year, but I recently read "Free Range Kids" and LOVED it. I didn't agree with every point she made, but it definitely made an impact and taught me a few things.

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L.C.

answers from Los Angeles on

My fav book, and the one I still give along with any baby shower gift, is "Dr. Mom" by Dr. Neifert. It may be out of print, but I always find it on Alibris.com website. I used that one from birth to pre-teen!

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C.A.

answers from Los Angeles on

i really like super baby food. i know it isn't a parenting book.

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L.C.

answers from Los Angeles on

My mother recommends Blessing of the Skinned Knee (which I have but haven't read yet). I read a bunch of books though. The Baby Bargains book is a good one if you haven't read it. It gives a lot of good money saving advice. All the books mentioned from other responders have some good ideas in them and bad ideas in them. I look at the reviews on Amazon and pick from there. You have to pick the ideas that you like and that you can live with. You also have to remember that babies have their own likes and dislikes and personalities and they may not follow any of the "guidelines" in the books. There is a lot of winging it involved. For example I was not able to swaddle the doll in baby class but my husband could. All the books say to swaddle the baby. When my son was an infant he HATED swaddling so it didn't matter that I couldn't do it. My son is 8 now so I can't remember all the books I read but I did read as much as I could.

Hope this helps!

C.B.

answers from Kansas City on

i loved "what to expect when you're expecting"! i always meant to get the others but that first couple years i guess i was too busy lol. now that my son is 4 i got "how to talk so kids will listen and listen so kids will talk" and i LOVE IT also. the key with any of these books is to take it with a grain of salt. no "how to" book is ever going to be perfect - all kids are different and nothing works on every kid. mostly take what you like and/or what works, and leave the rest.

i just have to say as a side note - i am not normally one to get easily offended, just the title alone of "how to have your S. child first" kinda does offend me! as a firstborn mom of an only (and not planning more) that's kinda an iffy title isn't it!? like something is wrong with firstborns or something? lol. probably won't be checking that one out!

seriously though, you will probably have little need for parenting books (not to mention little time to read them!) - when i have had an issue with my son that "My" methods haven't helped, i have reached out to get ideas to widen my arsenal, so to speak...but no book will teach you the best way to raise your child. that is going to come from you.

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J.B.

answers from Atlanta on

I highly recommend reading P.E.T -Parenting Effectiveness Training now or in the first year of your child's life. It's a wonderful philosophy and background for how to handle your child and effectively communicate from the very beginning. I have a 4 year old and a 2 year old, and I REALLY wish I had read this when the first was an infant or before he was born. I've read many books, and I also like a lot of what "Parenting With Love and Logic" has to say and "How to Talk So Kids Will Listen and Listen So Kids Will Talk" -go ahead and read that one before your baby hits 1. I did take a lot from "The Happiest Baby on the Block"and "The Happiest Toddler on the Block" -the baby one was actually very helpful.

You will find as your child become a toddler and then a regular kid that certain things work better than others, so you have to work with your personality and your child's personality. That's why I like P.E.T. so much -regardless of your personalities, it really addresses communication and instilling responsibility and logical thought into your child.

Updated

I highly recommend reading P.E.T -Parenting Effectiveness Training now or in the first year of your child's life. It's a wonderful philosophy and background for how to handle your child and effectively communicate from the very beginning. I have a 4 year old and a 2 year old, and I REALLY wish I had read this when the first was an infant or before he was born. I've read many books, and I also like a lot of what "Parenting With Love and Logic" has to say and "How to Talk So Kids Will Listen and Listen So Kids Will Talk" -go ahead and read that one before your baby hits 1. I did take a lot from "The Happiest Baby on the Block"and "The Happiest Toddler on the Block" -the baby one was actually very helpful.

You will find as your child become a toddler and then a regular kid that certain things work better than others, so you have to work with your personality and your child's personality. That's why I like P.E.T. so much -regardless of your personalities, it really addresses communication and instilling responsibility and logical thought into your child.

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D.E.

answers from San Diego on

I recommend the following books:

1. Anything by Dr. Sears
2. What to Expect the First Year
3. Mindful Parenting (Everyday Blessings: The Inner Work of Mindful Parenting)
4. Parenting with Love and Logic
5. Nurtureshock
6. Too Much of a Good Thing
7. Graceful Parenting (a small, simple book, but with a lot of wisdom)

Just remember to take it all with a grain of salt. Sometimes your instincts are best, and there are no set rules on how to be a good parent; good parents come in many forms.

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K.B.

answers from Minneapolis on

Some of the books mentioned will get you through the situations in infancy and childhood. My favorite for shaping your own parenting attitude is "How Much is Enough? Everything You Need to Know to Steer Clear of Overindulgence and Raise Likeable, Responsible and Respectful Children" by Jean Illsley Clarke, PhD. It will help you decide what kind of child you want to raise - and how YOU will help your child get there. Very easy to read and follow, great examples that help you understand how your parenting affects your children. Read it now - before the baby comes, then refer back to it every six months or so. Good luck!

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T.D.

answers from Los Angeles on

I read nearly every baby/parenting book out there. The most practical, helpful books I read were:

The Girlfriend's Guide to Pregnancy - Vicki Iovine
The Girlfriend's Guide to the First Year - Vicki Iovine
The Baby Whisperer - Tracy Hogg

This is all you need! Congratulations & best of luck with your pregnancy!!

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J.B.

answers from Cleveland on

Practically, I found "What to Expect When Your Expecting" to be the best, just be sure you buy it new so you have the newsest edition. However, that being said, I would highly recommend the fiction/memoir "Bump in the Road: From Happy Hour to Baby Shower" by Maureen Lipinski. Its not a parenting book but the author is hilarious and so relatable to everything I went through pregnant. She has a second book called "Not Ready for Mom Jeans" about after the baby is born that was just the comic relief and "support" I needed while up all night nursing.

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S.O.

answers from San Diego on

I have skimmed through or read most of the books already mentioned here. I was able to take a few things from each book that I felt was in line with my parenting style and applied it to our family. But the one book that I still refer back to, and my kids are 6 and almost 3, is Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child. Getting good sleep is the base for life, functioning, health, development, etc. for all of us.

I really like the Girlfriends Guide books, very funny and if you haven't experienced what's in it, you definitely know someone who has.

Like another poster mentioned, you kind of have to create your own parenting book as you go. Take tidbits from other parents and books, and apply them to your family and learn from your mistakes. No book of video is going to tell you all you need to know about raising YOUR family since each family is unique.

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