Potty Training HELP - I'm Going Crazy

It sounds like it is a blockage since this does not happen when she takes the laxative. Definitely call her doctor.

Why would you even imply this could be her regressing or her not caring, when clearly it's a medical problem???

poor little tyke. this is clearly a medical issue, and she's so little and has to cope with it. saying she 'seems not to care' is putting a pretty dim face on her courage in dealing with something clearly out of her power to control.
i would help her out by making sure she gets plenty of water and fiber, gentle laxatives as needed, but most of all letting her use pull-ups and not looking at at medical problem as 'regression.'
khairete
S.

I agree that it could still be a blockage issue. Just because you might have cleared her out, it might have been incomplete, but enough to delay the return of symptoms. And if the only treatment was a temporary dosing of laxatives, then the underlying reason(s) she was blocked to begin with still has not been addressed.

Our daughter (around the same age, also potty trained very early--- by her 2nd birthday) had some issues also. She had severe spasmodic pain. We went through all the UTI samples, yeast infection assumptions, etc. But she was constipated. Like your daughter, she had a bowel movement daily. HOWEVER, she did not fully empty. She only went enough to stop the urge, and so over time, she became backed up, and when that happened, it would press on her bladder causing spasms.

The solution for her was staying home for several days in a row and treating with MOM (Milk of Magnesia) twice a day (in adult dosages) to completely flush her out... and THEN to RETRAIN her bowels. We were given instructions about how to do this (10 minutes after each meal, go sit on the potty for 10 minutes --with a book if need be). So that she stayed long enough to fully empty. At that age they are so busy that they don't have "time" to sit around on the toilet.. they have things to DO. ;)

So, we had to teach her that she needed to be patient and fully empty, not rush and just go enough to stop the urge. Having free flowing bowels (from the MOM) helped. :)

Talk to her doctor about their recommendations for retraining her once you are certain any blockages are flushed. If it is not that, then perhaps she needs dietary changes (maybe has an allergy or sensitivity that is related to her being blocked). But you need to find the root cause of the blockage, not just treat the blockage and go on as normal.

Good luck.

Our daughter was completely blocked and pooping only bunny-type pellets. She was put on a clean out regimen for 2 days similar to what you do before a colonoscopy. After the clean out she was placed on a full dose of Miralax daily for 3 months. Then we reduced the dose for the next 3 months. She still takes a tiny dose daily. The internist said to take Miralax for twice as long as it took for the problem to occur. However, she said it is gentle enough and only absorbs more water into the bowels, that you can use it forever.
Just giving Miralax without doing the clean out first may not be sufficient if she is indeed blocked.
Our pediatrician did not have the answers thankfully sent us to a pediatric gastro interologist.
Good luck with getting your daughter on the right track.

There's nothing that you describe that sounds like your daughter is just not willing. Even if she "seems" to not care, she may care very much but finds the situation beyond hope. If this is beginning to feel like a new normal for her, she may simply have no way to address the problem besides a big shrug. At her age, a month of difficulty is a very big fraction of her life.

Because of post-appendicitis adhesions and a post-delivery rectocele, my large intestine is pretty scarred and weakened. The rectocele slowly fills tight a few times a day, and I have to check and empty it digitally because numbness sets in when there's too much internal pressure. AND I can unexpectedly dribble pee. I have to wear minipad all the time, because I simply can't always tell what's going on in there. So please don't assume your daughter is being lazy or willful.

A whole bouquet to Ins'tthisfun's response. I hope you'll find a pediatrician who can help you address the root cause of the constipation. My grandson has had some difficult times with this, and needed medical intervention and new lifestyle habits. I wish you well.

Some of mine had overactive bladder. That's a little different. Is there any urgency (like does she have to run to bathroom and she's dribbling because she's not quick enough?). Just maybe something to ask about.

The bowel blockage urinary incontinence issues can be really helped by changing her diet gradually (once you treat the blockage). It's not just eating the high fiber foods and drinking more water - it's also avoiding foods like bananas and cheese (for some kids, these can just bung them up). So it's worth looking into foods at some point, because you'd hate to be doing laxatives while giving foods that are actually working against you.

It definitely doesn't sound like regression - sometimes kids' bodies do take a turn (a step back) ... so I wouldn't be overly concerned here. Most of my friends had pee or poop problems along the way with at least one of their kids. So long as they are doing x-rays and checking her over - sounds like she's in good hands.

Good luck :) And my kids would come home with dribble and not even notice (they are too busy to care) so I think her not being bothered is pretty standard if that helps!

In a similar situation our ped had us give miralax for a few months and then gradually stop all while keeping an eye on things to make sure the constipation did not come back. If I were you I'd talk to the ped about that. Maybe all the stopping and starting of the med isn't fixing the problem and she needs a longer consistent course of it.

Our son used to have a lot of constipation problems that led to peeing issues. He was older and his diet was too heavy with breads, even though they were hearty, full-grain breads. Miralax helped with the initial flushing, but it is a slow process because it is so gentle. Gentle is good, but be aware it will take time to fully clear his bowels of the constipated matter. Changing his diet, to return to a lot of fruits and veggies, helped the most to prevent reoccurrence. Grapes, raisins, and 100% fruit juices helped the most, partly because he liked them. Also, making sure he got plenty of fun running-around time helped, too. The more exercise and more fruits/veggies the better for him.

One additional note—our son would get stressed at times which contributed to the constipation. Kids can pick up on their own stress, or the stress of parents, even as little ones. Do you think it is possible she is picking up on your frustration with this situation? I had to learn to check my emotions at the door when he would have accidents. It's not always easy, I totally understand that, but it is worth asking yourself if that might be a factor as well.

Best of luck! As my dad used to say, "This too will pass." (Literally and figuratively.)
: )

I had a lady I worked with and she said her son was so blocked up that it filled up his whole intestines all the way up. He had to be on the adult dose of Miralax 2x a day for over a year. It took that long for him to clear out. Apparently he had some kind of rare anemia that took 3 years to find.

Now he is fine and has no problems at all.

Actually kids have accidents right up through first grade.
They get busy with something or are playing and don't want to stop for anything and they forget to take potty breaks before it's too late.
At 3 1/2 she's going through some developmental changes and sometimes things regress when they are making progress in other areas.

It's up to you how you want to deal with this but I was never one to want to deal with pee anywhere but in the potty, a pullup or a diaper.
I didn't want pee smelling clothes, furniture, carpet, bed, car, etc - it's worse than dealing with an incontinent pet - you can't crate train your child.
If dribbling has become a problem then I'd go with using pullups again until the problem is resolved.

You might try having her sit on the toilet backwards to see if that helps her empty her bladder more.

What's her diet like? Lots of fruit and veggies will add fiber to her diet and get her bowls moving. Prunes are a good choice too. Instead of using laxatives try using foods and exercise.

It doesn't sound like she's regressing, it sounds like she has a medical problem that may require a more specialized doctor and better treatment options. Take her to be evaluated by a gastroenterologist.

My son still had small amounts of pee in his undies for a couple years after potty training. Usually it was just a matter of waiting too long to go in to pee because he was distracted or playing. As long as she is not actually peeing her pants, and you know she does not have an infection, I would not worry about it too much. She is, like you pointed out, only 3 1/2.

Blockages in the bowels are one of the main reasons kids have this sort of issue.

But this issue is black and white. Either it's there or it's not. All you have to do is look at the X-ray.

Give her the lowest effective dose of Miralax DAILY, and move on with life. Modify her diet to one full of fruits and veggies and fiber, get her moving a LOT, physical exercise is key to moving the bowels regularly. In six months try again, but you're causing yourself a lot of undue stress over a medical problem that you've already identified and resolved.

I just went through a month of trying to figure out what was wrong with my GD and it turned out she was severely constipated, although she "thought" she had been pooping. Turns out she was pooping some, but not getting it all out and eventually is does add up! They showed me the x-ray and I could clearly she that she was full of poop!

They prescribed Mira-Lax and a high fiber diet. We started with the Mira-Lax that night. She took it for less than a week and then we stopped because she threw up after taking it. They had her on an adult dosage and I believe it was just too much once her system got cleaned out. So we stopped that and have just kept up with a high fiber diet and she is doing great!

So I would suggest doing something like Mira-Lax for a few days combined with a high fiber diet and then continue with the high fiber diet indefinitely. My GD eats oatmeal for breakfast, ham sandwich on whole wheat bread with lettuce, apples, granola bars, baby carrots, Wheat Thins (not all every day, but at least a combination of two of these items) for lunch and then a green salad and brocolli or green beans with dinner every night. There is very little that she eats that his not high fiber and it is working beautifully!

BTW, Gd thought she was pooping, but the doctor explained that if the poop is hard, she is not done and is to stay on the toilet until she is pooping soft poop. Then she's done!