Potty Training My Almost 3 Year Old

I have 2 boys (9 & 11 now) and a girl (2) and honestly EVERYONE has always said that boys are harder than girls to potty train, but I've found the opposite to be true really. My daughter knows she wants to, she just has trouble getting there in time. My boys however, were a snap! I simply told them to "make bubbles" in the potty (have daddy or an uncle show him how!) After they saw the "bubbles" in the potty, they were much more eager to want to try it again! I've also heard the "sink the cheerio" theory is a good one. I hope this helps!

Hi K.,
My advice to you would be that he is not ready. I just went through this with my almost 3 1/2 year old boy. First, my ped. said average age for boys is 3 1/2. Second, he suggested that I not force the issue as it won't work and may backfire. From my experience I agree. My son just didn't want to do it and I didn't force the issue. Mostly it was the poop issue. He gradually eased himself into the peeing thing and then literally one day he just said he wanted to poop on the potty and from that day on he has been potty trained. I think they themselves know when they are ready and forcing the issue could make them rebel more. I would continuously ask him if he wanted to try on the potty but he always said no very adamately and so I accepted that.
The time will come soon! Good luck.

I have twins, a boy and a girl. My daughter was showing interest in the potty early. My son was NOT AT ALL. One day, I put a pair of big boy underwear on him so that he could feel what it felt like not to wear a diaper. He started using the potty IMMEDIATELY (both pee and poo) and with NO ACCIDENTS AT ALL ever since - even overnight. Give it a try. It was AMAZING!!!!!

Oh, also I gave an incentive. One jellybean for pee, three for poo. He LOVED that too!!!!

My son has been potty trained since about 26 months! He still needs reminded every once in a while when he is really engrossed and playing. I was late training him though I had hoped he would be out of diapers before his second birthday!

Hi K.,
I have two boys and my oldest was completely trained by 3 years old, trained night and day....Now my youngest boy was potty trained during the day at age 3 1/2 and trained at night at 4 1/2. My theory is....potty training is hard enough, wait until it is his idea....boys work better that way normally; besides....if you wait until it gets warmer, it is a little easier. I just wouldn't push it. You will just get frustrated and so will he. Keep things enjoyable....They grow so very fast.

A little about me....stay at home mom of 4 children, 18, 14, 8 and 2 years old.
Mj

My son is just about a year older than yours, so I just got through it all not too long ago. We had a potty chair, but never any interest. He turned 3 in February, and still no real interest, sitting or standing. I took my week of vacation in March, and we hit it real hard. I took off the diapers and NO PULL UPS, they're the same as a diaper to them. We did big boy underwear. I started Monday morning, and by Wednesday, we actually left the house in underwear and came home clean!! He did not want the embarassment of an accident in public, which worked great for me. I had him stand, like daddy, and that worked best. I really had to stay on him about going, because he would hold it for hours on end. After this first week, I took him Walmart on Saturday and let him pick out 2 more packs of his favorite big boy underwear. We had an accident or 2 every day for the first few weeks, but if you catch a little tinkle, run them to the bathroom and have them finish in the potty if possible. Okay, so that was peeing, but #2 was a whole new battle. He was scared to death to sit on the potty and he said it hurt to poop, so for those first few weeks I let him have a pull up on at night, and he would poop then. It took almost 2 months longer to get him to go poop in the potty, but we were finally successful and stopped buying diapers and pull ups completely in June. They need to do it in thier own time, to an extent, but if you do not give them a little push, I'm convinced boys would wear diaper thier whole lives!! If you put him in underwear and he still has huge messes all day, he is probably not quite ready, but the biggest clue for me was that my son started waking up dry in the mornings, and that's when I knew he had definitely gained his bladder control. Sorry this is so long, I hope it helps. You will do fine, and so will your little guy!!

It seems like the more you fight, the less interested your son will be. My daughter didn't potty train until 3 1/2. Anytime between 2 and 4 is normal, and I have heard that boys generally take longer. No one ever poops under stress, so I would stop trying to force the issue. My daughter peed in the potty when she was good and ready, and then it was her idea, and it took no time at all! But then she was afraid of poop, so we let her keep pooping in a diaper, only putting it on when she said she had to poop. Otherwise she would just hold it in for days, which a nurse told me wasn't healthy and could result in a trip to the emergency room. You can keep showing the videos and sit him on the potty every week or two, reassuring him that someday he will be able to do it just like Mommy and Daddy. As with everything else, it seems there is so much pressure to potty train. I only worried about it when my mom accused me of "not even trying". As with sleeping and eating, you can't force them to do it. Yet my 4-year-old uses the potty, eats healthy food, and sleeps through the night. They do it when they are ready, and all we can do is be encouraging and help them develop good habits and consistent schedules. So don't stress-he will do it!! Good luck, R.

I am looking for advice on the same issue. My son will be 3 in January and refuses to try to go on the potty. He says he is scared of the potty. My older son wasn't trained until he was 3 (he is 5 now). I stripped him from the waist down and he only had one accident, the rest of the time he went in his potty chair. Good luck.

I know! LOL boys are fun arent they! we did all the potty books, chairs, etc when my son was 2 and I potty trained ME for a year! He could of cared less......finally I just stopped and realized he would when HE was ready,,,,,and he did! I had his sister and she was 2-3 weeks old.....( he was 3.5)he went in and went on his own and from then on he did. he had to make up his mind himself. I also had taken him on a tour of the preschool he would be going to once he was potty trained. He could not attend until he was ......their policy not mine.....
Now I have a 3 year old girl who is doing the same thing,,,, so I guess she will when she is ready too, they are all diffrent.....good luck!

The average age for boys to be potty trained these days is 3.5 years old. Don't push it. You can't force a child to poop or pee (you can threaten and they can choose to go instead of punishment but you truly can't >force< them to do it if they are set against it). You need to avoid a power struggle or it can get ugly real quick and last a long time. 1 out of 10 boys are diagnosed with encopresis these days (involuntary soiling of underwear due to impaction) and the majority of the time it starts with a power struggle over potty training.

I say wait a few months and try again. As his friends get older and get out of diapers then peer pressure will kick in and he'll start to be interested. One big thing I regret was trying to force my son to be potty trained before he was ready (started just before he turned 3).... it's now been 3 years and we're still dealing with encopresis -- which is NOT fun once your child is in elementary school. It normally takes 1-2 years to correct once diagnosed, btw.

My son's birthday is January 25th--he will be four this year. But in December of last year is when we finally got him potty trained...So I don't think you're off track with that. But, really, in my opinion, you will always struggle with getting them away from coloring/playing, whatever they may be doing, to go potty!! You just have to recognize the potty dance! Anyways, I would try a chart. I know some people reward their children with like candy or little goodies for going potty...I don't believe in that, because it's something that they have to do, they aren't going above and beyond what's expected of them. But with a chart, they still get the recognition, and know that they did what they were supposed to...My son has a chart for daily activities, and it works really well with him. He uses stickers, and he loves getting those stickers on there at the end of the day, and seeing how well he did with different things. Hope this helps you out! I know potty training can be a very stressful time! Good luck!

No interest, no worries. WAIT. Back WAY off and try agin in a few weeks or months. He'll get it eventually - forcing him will prolong the process and create unneeded stress for both of you. While some boys are trained before their third birthday, I think it is totally typical for boys to learn between their third and fourth birthdays. I just finished training my fourth child. He is 3 1/2, and since we waited until he was ready, willing, and able, the whole process took about 2 days. I didn't wait long enough with my other kids and we had months of stress, wet pants, wet beds, and more. WAIT WAIT WAIT!!!

Once my son after his 3rd birthday just one day out of the blue asked to go potty it took 3 days. Took a little longer for BM's but not to long and it was a lot less stress then my sister-in-law had with her son
Good Luck

Hello K.,
How are you? Sounds as if your a little frustrated know that it will be just fine ok? Now I have a seventeen and ten year old so it has been a little while for me how ever my personal experience is that we have to be so patient and understanding because believe it or not are children sense that. If your frustrated, out of patience and have a sense of I do not know what to do your son is going to feel the same way.
What I did for my children was make potty training really fun for them. I didnt make it seem like a chore. My seventeen year old is a boy and he actually trained quit early. what I did for him was where his potty was we put up pictures he drew and when he had to number two he would have a book to look at and my favorite when he wanted to stand I would put fish(cut out)and he would aim for the fish like target practice. Just try making it into a little game. Now my ten year old who is a girl she wanted to do as I did. She would put her potty next to the toliet in my bathroom and would want to come sit when I did. Then he might really just like standing my son did. Just be patient make it fun and lots of clapping and yeahs. It worked for me and maybe it will for you.Good luck to you K. and God Bless you and your family

K., what worked for us was letting him run around the house naked and when he had to pee, he HAD to use the potty. that part of potty training was pretty easy for us, but he showed interest in it really young and we just went with it, and it was a no-pressure situation, and he got the whole peeing in the potty down before he was 3. Now, pooping in the potty was much different, but i have heard that, something about it scares them sometimes, we finally got one of those "kid" seat that you put on your own toilet and after a while he finally started going poopy on the potty too. Good luck, i know it can be frusterating, but peole i have talked to have sid that when they are "ready" they will do it

All kids are different but I would say he should be fully potty trained by 3 1/2.

My oldest son was trained by 2 years and 3 months. My second was almost 4 when he finally was fully trained and my third (all boys) was 3 1/2. If you want to send him to pre-school he will probably need to be trained so to start working on it now is great!

Boys have such a hard time sitting still and taking time out of play that it's a good idea to have him sit on the potty and have a small table near by with something he can do (play-doh, coloring, big legos or whatever will keep him busy). Only let him do whatever activity you choose when he is on the potty. Stay consistant and positive!

Hi K.,
My children are older but I remember our potty training years vividly as my son was not interested at all in giving up his diapers. His preschool did not admit unpottytrained 3 year olds so I forced the issue. Big Mistake! I did what you are doing, books, rewards etc but it didn't help. It set us back a year in my estimation, he had accidents and felt badly about himself during the whole process. I encourage you to back off for now, even though you are crazy busy with both of your children. I can tell you that my son is now 19 and in college and having no trouble. haha....I'm just saying that if you give him time it will happen. Good luck!
K.

the best thing for my kids was peer pressure........ so if you have some good friends that wouldn't mind having a potty party, it's the best thing to motivate him to be a big boy. just let him watch a kid pee in the toilet. and kids who are potty training are excited to show off what they can do.

DON'T force it, it will only create power struggles. talk about it happily, with no pressure, and when he's ready, it'll happen.

You know, I was told by several people not to ever force or rush potty training. Some kids take up to 6 years...but typically between ages 1 to 4yrs. My oldest was potty trained by 2yrs., my youngest started at age 11months, but really didn't become successful until she was 4yrs. old. Even though she had accidents until she was 9yrs. of age. My youngest is now being potty trained, she was interested since 11months, but than she reverted due to the fact that her best friend moved away and they were learning things together (potty training, etc..), and on top also due to the fact that we ended up taking in her cousin who was a new born at the time. I had to tell my sister in law that she needed to find a new sitter at the time due to the fact that my daughter wanted to be a "BABY" still...she wanted to all of a sudden nurse, suck on pacifiers, bottles, be in diapers and act like a baby. So after that, she had finally quit wanting all that and started potty training again. She is fully potty trained now, not nursing nor ever really sucked on a bottle or a pacifier. She never liked the "fake" nipples. So it was no biggie here. Anyhow, If you practice or have your hausband practice with him,(take him to the potty and let dad show how its done). My sister actually took her boys into the bathroom and threw Cheerios in the toilet and told them to pee on the cheerios! It worked!! Well, good luck and have fun!

Hi K.,

I understand you wanting to get your son out of diapers... especially since you have 2 in diapers now. I had 3 in diapers for a full year and manoman was it expensive!!! None of my boys were ready to potty train until after they were 3. And my twins took forever before they were poop-trained. UGH! I have to agree with the other Mommas and say that if you wait until he is totally ready, it will go so much smoother for all of you! Keep reading the potty books every now and then. Keep him exposed to Dad going in the toilet. But don't push him... let him decide when he's ready. =)

Best of luck,
S. ~ Momma of 4 boys

p.s. One "trick" that helped my boys along was throwing a cheerio in the toilet and letting them try to sink it! It was just one of the games we played to make it fun.

My ped. said some boys potty train later. When we went for his 3 year old check up she said not to worry until he was older than 3 and half, then if he still showed no interest we would discuss the possiblity of other problems. She said even then if he was showing any interest at all she would take it to still be normal progression. Hang in there, Don't make it a power struggle, TRY to make it fun and a game and he'll want to do it!

Is your girl older? The reason I ask is because I have 3 wonderful girls, and when a younger one watched the older one go off to school (pre-school), she wanted to go too. I always told them if they wanted to go to school, they needed to go potty on the potty, no more diapers. Maybe it would work with a boy too?

Also, I did learn with my last one who's 3 also, not to push it. She did finally decide she wanted to try it out, and of course with all of us clapping and making a big deal out of it, she kept it up :)

I wish you much luck!
A. L

Everyone always says that boys are later and that is true. You won't be able to force him if he isn't interested. You need to wait for that time. Although if you didn't want to wait, you can try what I did. I bought an insert for the big toilet and just started sitting my son on the toilet every night and it just started to click with him. Hope this helps.

I have 5 sons - ages 6-15. I followed my mother's advice and didn't even attempt to start potty training until after they turned 3. Mine were between 3 1/4 yrs to 3 1/2 yrs when I introduced it, and they were experts by a week's end with few to no accidents for daytime and naptime. All night training took about 3 weeks with few accidents in a Pull-Up. Boys are different from girls when it comes to potty training readiness (I also have 2 girls...) I know some people who start boys at the age of 2, and that is their choice (or the daycare's rules...) but I never saw the need to rush it. They grow up too fast as it is, and in the big picture when they are teenagers, will it make a difference if they were potty trained by 2 1/2 or 3 1/2?

Good Luck!

I have 2 boys & there were both trained right around the age of 3 - what worked for us was taking the diapers away completely during the day - my older one had 7 pee accidents in the first 5 hours, but figured it out after that, and the other one worked the same way. I kept them in pull-ups at night for a while, but this worked for me.

The pooping side of things will take longer - boys don't seem to care if they have a poopy accident. We also used M&M's as rewards - we kept a jar of them in the kitchen & when they went #1, they got 1 M&M, and when they went #2, they got 2 M&M's. We don't keep sweets in the house, so this was a big treat for them.

Good luck - boys are tough to potty train, but they do get it eventually - i've yet to meet a 21 year old still in diapers :)

-T.
http://MamaWorksFromHome.NET
http://FamilyBenefitsLive.com

There is no magical age that a kid needs to be potty trained by or a magical start date. My ped gave me the best advice ever. He told me that the majority of kids do not even have the "sensation" that they need to go until after the age of 2. I asked because my ex-MIL insisted that we start trying to potty train my son before he turned 2. She was sure his aunt was potty trained at 9mo. I hear these stories all of the time, and as I get older I have to wonder if it is a lapse in memory of the actual age some of these kids were potty trained. What my ped said to do was to let them do it on their own time. He emphasized DO NOT PUSH IT. I did this with all 3 of mine (12,7,5.) It worked exactly as he said. My oldest was just over 2. We came home from work one day, and he said "momma, I have to go." He never had an accident after that! I did the same with the other 2. My daughter was around 3 before she was ready, and the same with my youngest son. We have 15 kids between me and my sisters, and most of all of them were around 3 or a tad older. My personal opinion is that when they get a little closer to 3, they get tired of the goo in their pants and want to be a "big kid" like the others. Try ignoring the subject for a while and see if it makes a difference.

I wouldn't worry too much. Just keep encouraging him to use the potty and try to spike some interest. Boys tend to potty train around 3 or 3 1/2 (later then girls). The best advice I can give is that when a child is ready they practically potty train themselves but if you force it too much then you can actually postpone it more then help. Like I said just encourage and try to spike the interest by talking about "big boy underwear" and how he will get to wear them if he uses the potty.
Good luck!

Please do not force him to go, he will use the potty when he is ready. You will only wear yourself out trying to force him and he will still show no interest in going. I went through the same situation with my son...I tried everything. He didnt start using the potty consistently until he was four! Good Luck!!!!

A couple of years ago I read an article that stated the average age for boys who stay home with their moms to potty train is 39 months. The article broke the info. down based on sex, race, and working status of the mother. So, according to this, your son isn't really behind the norm.

I found with my 2 oldest children (now 81/2 and 7) that they potty trained very easily once I gave up the burden and let them do it on their own timing....which I will add went along with the timing stated in the article. 36 mo. for female and 39 for male -- of stay at home moms.

Hope this helps to ease your mind.

Both my sons were potty trained almost to the day of their 3rd birthdays. Previous to that, absolutely no interest at all. My advice is to relax, don't struggle with him. It is good to introduce the idea by way of books and DVD's but my belief is that they will show the interest when they are ready. Some are trained before others, but I guarantee he will be ready before college...most likely even before Kindergarten!

My son is almost 3, will be in Feb. and we just started. He has shown interest before but never to the point that I felt I should force. Problem I have is that he is in daycare during the day and they are pushing for him to be potty trained by time he turns 3 so he can move to the preschool room. Puts way more pressure on me which in turns puts pressure on him. I am taking it one day at a time. He goes about 2-3 times a day but some days I have force him to sit on the potty. I have ended up putting the potty in front of the tv and letting him watch Diego. It seems to work. I think he didn't like sitting in the bathroom cuz he is bored. Just go w/the flow and it will come.

Maybe he needs to be interested. We started our girls out by using a kitchen timer - start it for 30 minutes and when it rings say it's potty time. We called it the potty clock. We also bought the kiddie kandoo wipes that are colorful and we call them the poopy wipes, so my daughters are excited to use them when they poop on the potty. We also bought the huggies clean team soap that blinks while they wash their hands. It helped to make it exciting for them and make them interested. Also, let him walk around without undies on.... Good Luck.