Terror in the Bathtub

Updated on September 22, 2010
C.K. asks from West Covina, CA
24 answers

Lately, my 14 month old son has been freaking out during his bath. Everytime water is poured down his face, he quickly stands up, or at least tries to. His dad & I take turns giving him a bath and we make sure that he doesn't get water in his eyes. Tonight he cried the whole duration.. it was quite scary. We really don't know what to do. I mean, we have toys in the water, we comfort him as much as possible.. we even sing!
Any suggestions??

update: oh and we have that cup that has the elastic band on one side so it can mold to his head, holding the water away from his face.... and he doesn't like that either because he knows that water will be dumped on his head. :/

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So What Happened?

Thanks a lot for your suggestions. I completely forgot about the whole washcloth thing, it's just that it's been so long. I do have a wash cloth on hand but he takes it with him to play with. I wish that I didn't have to wash his hair so much.. it's because all these people kiss and rub their faces on his head so he gets all oily! gross, huh? and I also wish that I could put on those bathing hats but he like to take them off too. He did do a lot better with the cloth and I trust everyone about this being a "phase".

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M.M.

answers from Los Angeles on

We used the no rinse foam/shampoo. All you need is a wash cloth to wipe it off. Works great!

I found it at Mother's Market.

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J.L.

answers from Los Angeles on

we got a removeable shower head and my girls have liked using that better. It is more gentle, easier to direct and less threatening I think.

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K.S.

answers from Las Vegas on

I take a wash clothe and wet it, than sqweeze water out...mold it on her forehead, tip her head back alittle and use a cup to pore water on her hair...she gets NO water in her face ever!! Sometimes I stand in the tub behind her! It works GREAT! Than I rinse clothe and wipe her face and we're done w/the hard part...GL

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S.R.

answers from Los Angeles on

My son would freak out with water on his head as well. He was the same age as your little one. We just kept doing it and would smile and say "Yay!" so he would know that it was okay.
And we usually saved the water dumping part for last so that i could take him out if he got too upset and then i would talk to him and tell him that he isnt going to get hurt when mommy is there.
We did it every time he had a bath, and eventually he got over it and began to understand that if he looked up the water didnt touch his face.
Now he is 8 and begs us to take him to the pool and beach and he LOVES water!

2 moms found this helpful

G.M.

answers from Los Angeles on

Two suggestions:
You can use a drenched washcloth to rinse/wipe the soap off of his head. Just keep dipping and wiping. And using as little soap as possible to get the job done in the first place is a good way to go.
Also, offering baby a dry cloth to wipe his face or you do it and console him by telling him you'll dry his face right away.
My son still can't be bathed quietly by my husband. Most husbands lack the ability to be sensitive enough to properly tackle this task. ;)
I want to add that your boy is healthy & smart with good instincts! As humans we take for granted, often times, that healthy instincts are sometimes inconvenient in our developed/civilized lives. Any child with good sense reaches a point in their development when they have the "flight" reaction to the threat of possible drowning. SMART KID! :)

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A.Y.

answers from Los Angeles on

Getting in the bath with my son helps him a lot with his anxiety about having his hair washed. I often let him dump water on my head first and then he will let me do it to him in return. Also having special bath versions of his favorite cars seems to help get him excited about the bath.
We wash him as soon as he gets in so the "bath" part is over quickly the. He can play for as long as he wants. I have him tip his head back and then use my hand to shield the water from running down his face when ringing his hair. I also explain each step along the way so he knows what's coming

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L.M.

answers from Reno on

HI. I haven't read any of your responses yet, so I apologize if I'm repeating someones suggestion. :)

Try giving him a "special" washcloth to hold over his face/eyes. Make a big deal about it. Perhaps go with him to buy his very special "Bath-time Towel". Maybe one with say, Elmo, Cars, and animal, etc... on it. And be sure to use it only at bath time!

This worked with my oldest daughter and now my son who is 28 mos. and reacts the same way if he doesn't have it.

Good luck!

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M.S.

answers from San Francisco on

Goggles really helped get our kids over the fear of water on their heads. They loved putting them on and helping pour the water. Try it out!

M

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N.S.

answers from Chicago on

No need to pour water on his face! I wouldn't appreciate that either! Can you gently use a baby washcloth?

For his hair, put the washcloth on his forehead so the water doesn't run down his face. Hopefully that will help!

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D.W.

answers from Los Angeles on

oh my. We had this too. It went away eventually. I finally let go of my own fears that my child would be dirty forever and that helped a LOT. I learned to offer her the choice of bathing or wiping and some nights would just wipe her body with a warm wash cloth. They don't need soap nearly as often as we think. I'd even just wipe down her hair. And then, once in a while, sometimes only after a couple of weeks, we'd have to insist on a bath. She seemed to scream a little less when she didn't have to endure it as often. This went on for almost a year... and gradually just went away. We'd talk about it with her sometimes. About what might be scary about baths, washing hair... We still have hair washing trouble (at 3) but now she will actually try and do it herself which sort of works :)

Before I got all zen about this I actually took her to see a child development specialist because her reactions were sooooo extreme. She told me it was a sensory issue and that the sensation of pouring water on her body might literally be painful for her. This helped me empathize more with my daughter. And made bathtime less stressful for both of us.

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D.W.

answers from Phoenix on

Hello!
I have had this at different stages with my now 22 month old daughter. Just pay attention to what might be ok with him and go from there. Most of the time they are not that dirty that you would have to go through this every day, so that may help with cutting some of the stress down.
Are there maybe too many toys so they might cause overload?
My daughter always enjoyed washing her hands, so for some time I did not fill the tub, but just have her stand in the tub while the water is running and washed her while she held her hands under the running water. Then I pulled her out when done, there was no playing with toys and she was fine.
The thing that has helped me with both kids the most is this 1/2-"bucket" with a flexible edge on the straight side that makes washing hair a breeze while not getting water in their eyes and face. I found it at Walmart and it was worth every penny. They just need to keep their chin up and it is no issue.
As for the face, I just wash that at the sink with a wrung out washcloth and its fine.
Good luck!

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S.S.

answers from Los Angeles on

I think every young child hates having water poured over his head. My 3 yr old son was like that at that age and still doesn't like water dumped on his head. And he won't "lean back" in the tub sufficiently for me to rinse his hair without getting his face wet. However, we have also been bringing him into the shower with us since he was very young (under 1 yr old) and he has never had a problem with the water showering down from above. When he was younger, I would shower will him in my arms or sitting on the floor of the shower, as he's gotten older, he just stands under the water while I (or my DH) wash and rinse his body/hair. We've found that showers were so much easier. Granted, now he likes the bathtub more so that he can play with more floaty toys... Good luck.

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J.H.

answers from Phoenix on

My daughter who is now 2 1/2 is the same way and I haven't figured out the magic secret. I can't wait to read your responses. She has been like this since she turned one and I always thought she hated water. As she gets older, I realize that she is a little more sensitive about her ears getting wet and that is part of the problem. I tried ear plugs for swimming in the pool, but that only worked for awhile. One thing that gives us relief on some bath nights is she is old enough to lay down and get her own hair wet and rinse the soap out. I just have to make sure there is not very much water in the tub. She likes the independence and can control the water near her face.

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A.H.

answers from Los Angeles on

I saw a bathtub visor for kids online - maybe Amazon.com. Worth a try.

L.A.

answers from Austin on

It is a phase.. Some kids freak because of the running water, some because of the drain.. I agree, no need to pour water on him just use a really saturated wash cloth.. Let him hold the cup..

Do you have him in a bath chair? This way his legs are straight out and he cannot as easily stand..

Ear plugs are also awesome..

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C.W.

answers from Austin on

Wal-mart sells cups made to rinse hair with... they have an elastic strip on one side so that you can dump water on his head, and the water won't run in his face...

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C.A.

answers from Atlanta on

My cousin's son was like this and he actually would be acting like or maybe he was gasping for air even though she knew she wasn't getting water in his face or eyes. He also would do the same thing when you would blow air into his face or if the wind picked up and hit his face just right he would do the same thing. He grew out of it because he is like 9 now and we never could figuire out the reason other than maybe he had a sensitivity to that stuff. My cousin's mom swore up and down he was an "old soul" and he must have experienced some sort of trauma in a previous life-yeah I know what you are thinking-crazy???!!! Some people believe that though and I can't give you any advice because they never figured out anything to help him out they just dealt with it but as I said he just eventually grew out of it.

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S.B.

answers from Los Angeles on

Have you thought about giving him sponge baths for a while? You can use a very wet, soapy wash cloth to run through his hair, and then rinse it with another wet cloth. After a few weeks or a couple of months, you can try the bath tub again.

V.W.

answers from Jacksonville on

How about not pouring the water down his face... ?

My hubby, when giving baths to our kids, would take the water pourer (that came with the baby bath... had a little spout, really neat) and just dump it straight over the top of their heads to rinse the shampoo. Sounds like what you are doing.
I have NEVER done it that way. I have them look up at the ceiling (you can pin something up there if you want, to have something for them to look at/focus on) and I pour the water from their hairline on their forehead BACKWARDS down their back. If you can put one arm/hand behind their back to help support them and have them lean back a little it helps. My kids, neither one, EVER complained when I did it this way. But they BOTH said they preferred ME to give their baths instead of Dad. When asked why, it was because of the way he rinsed their hair.

It is totally not necessary to have the water run down all over their faces! I wouldn't like that either!

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M.B.

answers from Los Angeles on

My son is the same way and he just turned 5 on Monday. A couple of things have helped me.... showing a movie while taking a bath distracts the child, using a squirt bottle that sprays light gentle sprays helps, and I purchased a visor at www.onestepahead.com that you put on the child's head and water does not get on their face. It is awesome! We also bought the cup witht he elastic band on one side, but it didn't keep the water from falling on his face. Good luck.

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J.T.

answers from Kansas City on

i remember my older brother was like that of course this has been 58 yrs ago. but my mom would make a game that he gets to hold a wash rag over his face mostly his eyes mom would ask him to help momma by holding the rag and he liked the idea of helping. you have some really good advice on this subject, try it all until one works,or maybe it's a stage that he hast to work threw his self like the others have said good luck my dear pray for help

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J.C.

answers from Lincoln on

Totally normal, 3 out of my 5 boys were the same way. Just keep going, don't react to his hysteria. He'll get through it, eventually he'll even take a shower on his own. Look forward to those days. :-)

C.C.

answers from Fresno on

One of my daughters went through a phase like that. I went to Babies R Us and bought a bath visor. It's made by Sassy, I think, and it's made out of this foam material so it makes a pretty good seal around the child's head. You fasten it in the back with velcro. Those little visors were GREAT during this phase, because although the water got dumped over my daughter's head, it didn't get in her face or ears. It made bath time much better for us. (And take heart, it won't last forever. Both of my daughters LOVE water now that they are older - can't get them out of the pool!)

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D.B.

answers from Charlotte on

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