Transitioning into Own bed....HOW????

Infants need touch in order to for their brains to develop properly. This is a proven fact, read the article below. If you want a child that is confident and happy you should let her sleep with you until she leaves on her own (usually around 2ish if they've had enough touch). The Continuum Concept is also a great book that explains why we need touch and what it does for our brains. Please let her sleep with you, I assure you it's what's best for her overall/lifelong wellbeing.

http://faculty.plts.edu/gpence/PS2010/html/Touch%20and%20...

Your Daughter is not being stubborn, she just knows what feels normal, to be next to her mom. Babies sleep better and more soundly when they hear the rythem of the mothers heart beat. They remember this from the womb, and it helps regulate their own beat. They also have an amazing sense of smell, and feel safe when they smell the mom and her milk. My suggestion to you is enjoy this precious time with your baby, because it really doesn't last that long. The benefits of co-sleeping are great, leading to a more independant and centered child in the long run. They will transition into their own bed a lot easier when the time is right for them. Good luck! S.

If your daughter is a clingy one, then I wouldn't push it. Every child has different needs and this time in your lives will only last such a short while. If you wait a bit longer, maybe 12 or 18 months, you might be able to set up her bed and make it really fun for her. Put fun soft toys and blankets on her bed with pictures she can look at on the wall. Make it really exciting. We did this with our first child and put his crib matress on the floor next to our bed. That way I could roll out of bed when he woke up at night, nurse him back to sleep, and hop back into my bed. Or maybe you can fit a twin size matress down there so it's not so horribly uncomfortable to fall asleep there for a while. Then you can transition them into thier own room.
As far a weening goes, I don't believe you should push more than one thing on them at once. In my experience, it seems to make them more upset and clingy.
There is a really good book called "The No Cry Sleep Solution". It helped us a lot and many other people recommend it. Good luck!

My son hated the crib from the beginning, we finally gave up at 9 months and put him in a regular bed. Best thing we ever did. I was still nursing, and I could climb in bed with him and nurse him, and he'd stay in his bed since he'd usually fall asleep. He ever fell out of the bed, and he doesn't get outof the be now without permission, and he is four, so I'd say use a regular bed.

We are having some of the same issues with our youngest (14 months). Stubborn, likes sleeping with us, still nursing, etc.

About 2 months ago we put his crib matress in our room on the floor. We put him down to sleep ther. When he wakes up in the night we encouage him to crawl over to our bed himself and then he sleeps the rest of the night with us. (He has been sleeping longer and longer on his matress.)

Now we have his twin bed matress on the floor in his room and he and his sister sleep together. If he needs to he can still crawl into our room.

It is a slow process but it is working for us :)

What's the rush to get her out? If she is not ready, it will be a constant struggle every night and everyone will be miserable. You know she is happy with you, why not just leave her there and let her be happy? Are you getting pressure from extended family or culture to get her out of your bed?

There is nothing wrong with it. Most cultures (outside America) cosleep with their children and it is perfectly normal and in fact very healthy. Abra brought up a good point about how closeness boosts brain development. It also boosts their confidence. Attached children have less problems later with social interaction and self esteem issues.

Your daughter sounds like she is highly senstive to people and touch and that's not a bad trait to have in life, she will be compassionate with others. You will likely also have trouble weaning her this early. I would recommend rethinking that too. That is a source of comfort to her, whereas your oldest child seemed to only need it for nutrition and was fine with a cup. This child may need some more time nursing and is that really a bad thing? Again, worldwide most mothers breastfeed their children for 2 years. We are the anomoly country that tries to detach from our babies as soon as possible, weaning before age 1 and having them sleep in their own beds from birth. I think the trends are changing (there are more mothers nowdays breastfeeding toddlers than you might think! and cosleeping is becoming more common as well), but it takes mothers who don't listen to our society in general and instead listen to their babies and follow their cues to give them what they need. I encourage you to follow your child's cues! They grow so fast and you can't get back those first years where you make first impressions.

That said, I commend you for letting her sleep with you this long! And kudos for breastfeeding too! It isn't easy sometimes but it makes a huge difference to the child! I am still nursing my 3yr old who also sleeps with us. I know eventually he will leave but at least we had this time and I know he will grow into (he already is) a self-confident, independent, and loving young man.

the best advise i can give you in this situation is to get this book i read. Healthy Sleep Habits Happy Child by Dr. Marc Weissbluth. I started reading it and using the tips when my son was 8 months old and he has been sleeping in his bed and going to sleep with out being rocked since then. I am not sure about what to do when there are more than one child in the room, because i have only one,but the book covers all the aspects of sleeping and sleeping problems. It even helped me to figure out what was wrong with my sleeping habits. the book saved me from many sleepless nights trying to figure out how i could get him to sleep for more than 20 by himself. I think it would help. I bought it from amazon. com for about 10 bucks

One thing I did that helped was I would put something that I wore during the day, usually my shirt, in his bed and let him sleep on it, so that way he would have the scent of me and it did help. Another thing is that my son hated his crib and toddler bed because he had gotten so used to sleeping in our bed those lil matresses are just not the same, so we put him in a twin bed that my husband made and he put up a railing so my son wouldnt fall off, He now sleeps in his own bed all night long.

one simple solution would be to consider getting a double sized bed for the two girls to sleep in together. Put it in a corner if you can..and find some guard rails for the sides. If the younger one really is a snuggler then this may do the trick. My three younger kids all slept with older siblings and have always slept better that way.

Another thing to try is to put the younger one to bed 1/2 an hour to an hour earlier than the older one. When she is sound a sleep you can tuck the other one in quiety.

Routine helps too. Do the exact same thing every night. Bath, snack (a bowl of oatmeal is good!),story time, prayers or whatever is part of your routine, try lavender bath and lotion or massage oil in calming scents on the baby's feet. White noise in the room - humidifier, fan, one of those things that makes a waterfall sound. See if there is a special stuffed animal or blanket she likes and put it with her. Do everything in the same order, every night.. this will help her get used to knowing that this is the bed time routine.

now if she cries.... it won't hurt her. Go in there and DON'T pick her up. Get her to lay down again and rub her back just a little, then walk out and set the timer for 5 minutes. Let her cry. Go back in 5 minutes if she is still crying and do the same thing, then set the timer for 10 minutes, then 20 minutes up to half an hour. She really ought to fall asleep during one of these times. If she doesn't - after the 1/2 an hour try a mini-routine, change her diaper, get her a little drink, read a short story, then put her back to bed and do the whole thing all over again. You may need to have the older child sleep somewhere else until the baby gets the hang of it (explain it to her). This may take 3 or even 4 days but usually a kid will get the message after 2-3 days and the number of times you have to go in will shorten. There will be set backs but treat each one the same way.

You may want to consider how long and how late in the afternoon her last nap of the day is. If it is less than 4 hours before bedtime, consider shortening her nap by getting her up and taking her out for a walk, or do some interesting activity. Avoid running errands when she would fall asleep in the car etc. Do what you can to keep her awake so she can be ready for bedtime when it comes.

best wishes.

Hi D.. Your youngest sounds alot like my daughter....here's what we did: We broke the process down into smaller increments. First, we put her crib into our room so that she could still be near us but not in our bed. And yes, she did have to cry it out for the first three days or so, but after that it was okay. Then we moved her into a toddler bed in our room and eventually, when she was old enough to get excited about the idea of "her own big girl room" we moved the bed into her room. It was a long and gradual process but it worked for us without too much trauma. I think the issue is that change is just really hard for some children (and adults!). Good luck! L.