Underage Driving

Updated on October 27, 2013
L.P. asks from Denton, TX
18 answers

My neighbor lets her 14 year old son drive. I don't mean with her in the car coaching. I mean she sends him on errands, by himself. At least 3 times a week I see him driving their SUV. It aggravates me terribly. I don't know if I should call the police and report it, or not. We do not get along, and she has no problem keying neighbors cars whenever they make her angry. I want to do the right thing, but I don't want to deal with her retaliation. She is a heavy drinker, and I suppose I would rather her sober child drive, than her drive while intoxicated. Plus, I made my now 17 year old take driver's education, always have a licensed driver in the front seat, obey our city curfew and vehicle occupancy laws, and follow all the rules. Now she looks at me and asks why. Why were the rules so important to obey, if the neighbors can do whatever they want without any repercussions? I explained that we care. We care about her safety, and the safety of all the other cars on the roads. Maybe our neighbors just don't care. But I don't have an answer for why they don't get caught. So, should I report this? Is it my place to report it? What would you do?

What can I do next?

  • Add yourAnswer own comment
  • Ask your own question Add Question
  • Join the Mamapedia community Mamapedia
  • as inappropriate
  • this with your friends

Featured Answers

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

B.A.

answers from Dallas on

I have a neighbor like that . I had to ask myself can I live with this if he hits a child playing and runs out to get there ball . That driver will have to live with that for ever and you to. Just go to the police station and talk to the chief . let him know everything and you are worried of what she will do if she founds out . Trust me they can handle it in a way she will never know let them know about the keying also .
B.

1 mom found this helpful

More Answers

B.C.

answers from Norfolk on

Do you know if he has a hardship license?

"In Texas, for a minor to obtain a hardship license, the minor must be aged 14 to 18 years old; must have an unusual economic hardship on the minor's family, the sickness or illness of a member of the minor's family, or he or she is regularly enrolled in a vocational education program and requires a driver license to pursue the program and has completed an approved course in driver education."

Next time you see it call the police and report it.
If he has a license then there's no problem.
If he doesn't have a license then his mother is negligent.

http://www.nolo.com/legal-encyclopedia/car-accidents-negl...

Additional:
You need to report it.
If he doesn't have a license then he's not had the training he needs to drive safely.
If he has a license the police will see that he has it and he'll have done nothing wrong.
Kids driving cars get themselves and others killed.
The life you save might be your own.

4 moms found this helpful

K.M.

answers from Chicago on

I certainly would report it.

3 moms found this helpful

J.S.

answers from Chicago on

I think you and your daughter need to MYOB.

The reason he isn't getting caught by the police is he isn't breaking any traffic laws. And as TF pointed out, he might have a hardship license.

When I was 14, I had to drive my mom around and run errands for her. She was unable to drive herself because she had surgery that left her unable to drive for a month. I was a great driver (still am). So glad that some nosy busybody didn't go tattle on us.

3 moms found this helpful

T.F.

answers from Dallas on

You should first look at this from an objective adult perceptive instead of looking at it emotionally as the neighbor you don't like.

You don't know what you don't know. I can say my neighbor is a drunk and a horrible mom but that doesn't mean I am telling the truth because I am not in their house 24/7 to know the situation.

Also, TX is a state where a teen aged 14 can obtain a hardship license.

Do you KNOW this teen is driving with no license at all?

I do agree that the teen needs to be a insured driver on the car. You could question the non-ER police division regarding that issue.

As for potential revenge and basic security.... get a security camera. We have security cameras on our property. You don't have to spend a ton of $$$ on a basic camera, especially night vision one. You can get a basic night vision only at Academy for less than $100.

Lastly, as or your daughter. Praise her for following the rules and in reality.... life is not always fair. Like you... she does not know the full story either. Sometimes it is good to give someone the benefit of the doubt instead of spewing hate. Maybe your neighbors are misunderstood. There are so many things that could be effecting them right now that others are not aware of.

Maybe you could get to know your neighbors.

YES, I would concerned but also, I would keep in mind that there are all types of situations and that teen could have a hardship license. If what you say is true, I really feel for the teen and other members of that family.

3 moms found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

C.B.

answers from San Francisco on

I'm thinking that the kid probably drives fairly well if he drives that often and hasn't been caught. If that is the case, I'd mind my own business. If, however, you see that he's a nightmare behind the wheel, then I would probably try to report it anonymously.

Tell your child that two wrongs don't make a right and if she gets caught disobeying the laws/rules, SHE will suffer the consequences and saying "well, he (the neighbor)does x, y and z" is NOT going to get her out of it. It's like if someone jumped off a bridge, would you do it too?

3 moms found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

P.G.

answers from Dallas on

Call the police non-emergency line and tell them exactly what you told us. Ask what you should do, and how they would deal with it so there are no repurcussions from her. You may be able to report when he leaves, or give the police the plate # so that they can check who is driving when it's out and about.

2 moms found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

K.M.

answers from Dallas on

I think it comes down to what is legal, not anybody else's OPINION. It doesn't matter that someone else thinks it's okay because ThEy did it, too. That's just crazy. There are laws for a reason.

I think about him getting into an accident and killing himself or someone else.

As a responsible adult/citizen it is your responsibility to report it.

1 mom found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

M.S.

answers from Washington DC on

Wow, next time you see him out, report it. If he hurts someone that would be so sad for everyone involved, including you.

1 mom found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

J.K.

answers from Wausau on

I would, even if I did get along with the neighbor. In addition, talk to them about having CPS come and do a welfare check. She is putting her child and others in danger with her behaviors and choices, and there should be intervention.

1 mom found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

J.C.

answers from Anchorage on

While I don't agree with driving without a license, I would let this go for a couple of reasons. One, 14 is not that insane for a driving age, I got my license at 15, my sister was 14 when she got hers, and my husband was 12 when he got his farm license. It has only been the last decade or so that states have raised the driving age up up up.
Second, you said it yourself that she has a drinking problem. If her son does not drive to the store himself then A)she might drive, maybe even with him in the car, and put countless lives at risk, or B) the boy may have to go without the items he is running out for which could be for school, or even food so he can eat. IF you are concerned about his welfare then by all means, call CPS, but if he has not been caught driving I would assume it is because is is a decent driver, and at the very least, less dangerous on the road then his mother would be. In an ideal world everyone would follow the rules, but sometimes we just don't understand someone else's situation. I would let the family be and let them deal with the consequences if and when he gets caught.

As far as what to tell your daughter, well life is not always fair and she should be more concerned about her self then what the neighbors are doing. JMO

1 mom found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

A.V.

answers from Washington DC on

It's illegal. I would wait for him to drive out the next time and call the non emergency line. Give them the tag number and say he's 14, what can they do?

Why don't they get caught? Because life isn't always fair, but SHE should play by the rules because SHE will be safer.

My SD was told and told not to be on the phone. She was at a stop sign. She started to go before the other guy did. She nearly totaled our van. She was on the phone. To say we were livid is an understatement. She paid for the repairs. My SS had to pay a huge fine for going 92 on the highway. He argued with DH that it was unfair because HE felt safe. DH said the several hundred dollar fine and points was minor compared to what could have happened and if it happened again, we were dropping him from our policy and he could go find one with his bad driving history on his own.

Young people often do not have good judgement. That is just one reason to keep them off the road at 14. The "children" above were 19 and 22.

Your 17 yr old should know by now that the neighbor's rules or lack thereof doesn't change the rules for herself.

ETA: If he does have a special license, it will be on the books. They will know or can find out and probably be able to tell you. I would still address the concern because it's not a tractor going a pokey speed down a country road to get from one field to another. It's an SUV. I have not regretted calling the non-emergency line for more information on something I thought was suspicious or weird.

1 mom found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

K.M.

answers from Kansas City on

Forget those people who tell you to MYOB. This is your business! I've never heard of a hardship license and 14 sounds very young. I would definitely make some phone calls!!!

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

A.D.

answers from Dallas on

You insurance company can tell you how many licensed drivers live at that address.

R.X.

answers from Houston on

Most accidents happen close to home. Have you ever heard that? Okay, so you are their neighbor... The accident may effect you. Report it as soon as he leaves the house but leave your house to call so that when the cops come, you are not there and she will think so wine else reported it.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

J.C.

answers from Philadelphia on

I would have a hard time living with myself if he killed himself or someone else with his car. I think it should be reported. He most certainly is not insured which is not fair to any driver or pedestrian he may injure.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

M.H.

answers from Minneapolis on

I would call both the police and CPS before someone gets hurt or killed. When I called I would also tell them about her prior behavior and your fear of retaliation. Her previous actions are criminal behavior. Good luck! As for your daughter, unfortunately she needs to learn that life isn't fair. I think your answers to her were right on and someday (not for a while) she will appreciate that.

S.A.

answers from Chicago on

Yes, you should call the police. Do it the very next time you see him driving. Install a security camera on your property so that if she keys your car, you will have evidence.

For Updates and Special Promotions
Follow Us

Related Questions