Weaning from the Breast

Updated on April 28, 2009
A.M. asks from Cave Springs, AR
14 answers

I have a 19 month old daughter who still nurses at nap time and bed time (and sometimes through the night!) It is time to wean her, but I need help- I've never done this before! She does fine going to sleep/staying asleep when I am gone and my husband is with her, so I know she doesn't NEED it, it is just what she is used to. I'm planning on going cold-turkey with this, but really need to know what to do on my end. I know I will need to pump a little bit to ease the pressure....but what else? Help!!!

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B.S.

answers from Hattiesburg on

In my opinion and experience it is best to let the child wean when they are ready. Then they are emotionally secure, and there is no physiological engorgement as it is very gradual. The average age for weaning in the world is age 5 and we really force/push our kids here in this nation. All babies have a sucking need that ends at different times. There is no need to rush what is natural unless you have to go back to work and are unable to be with the child. The child will be healthier both emotionally and physically if you let them wean when they are ready.
B. S. RN CCM former lactation consultant and La Leche League member

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J.T.

answers from Oklahoma City on

Try some Ib's or tylenol to help with the pain. Dropping one feeding at a time will help also, although for it to be truly effective, it might take longer than you want to drop all the feedings. I know some people who swear by cold cabbage, but did not try it myself. Make sure you grab some pads for your bra to absorb any leakage. I just did my 6 month old and was surprised how long it took, but did not do any additional pumping. Not as comfortable, but I think it gets it over with more quickly in the long run. Also, plan to wear good support, day and night. You may already be doing this, but something tight across the breasts will help far more than just your standard nursing bra, a good sports bra or something of that sort.

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A.W.

answers from Baton Rouge on

no advice here just wishing you good luck. my son is 17 1/2 months old and he still nurses like all night, i'm so tired but dont know what else to do. i'm not ready to quit nursing durring the day but i would just LOVE for him to sleep through the night. anyway good luck to you and let me know what works

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N.M.

answers from Texarkana on

I breastfed my youngest for 26 months and the only reason I quit then was cause I ran out of milk it is good for her and you you have to hold her to breast feed her don't worry about it if you and her enjoy and its ok with your hubby just keep doing it and enjoy good luck

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B.C.

answers from Alexandria on

I was really nervous about that when weaning my first. We just cut out nap time feedings for a week and kept nursing at bedtime. The next week I just quit the last feeding. I didn't need to pump at all and had no pain. And I was surprised at how easy it was for both of us. To also help ease my anxiety about it I made sure there was a sippy cup of water she could have in her crib in case she woke up in the middle of the night. I've done that twice and it's worked for both of my girls. Good luck!

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V.U.

answers from Baton Rouge on

If you lose one feedind a day for about a week and then lose the next one, you won't need to pump. It will also help your little girl with the transition.

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A.S.

answers from Dothan on

I practiced child-led weaning with both my children and it was great for them and me. They were a lot older than your daughter. They are now 10 and 21, and I look back on that extended nursing time with pride and fond memories. I would never quit "cold turkey" unless it was medically necessary.

A. :)

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J.N.

answers from Little Rock on

Don't quit cold turkey. That would be possibly traumatic to your daughter & painful to you. Just cut out one feeding every 1-2 weeks. I did the weaning slowly & had absolutely no pain or discomfort. If you can, try to shorten the feeding before eliminating it entirely. Then when you do stop it, take that time to cuddle with a sippy cup of milk. So you still get some bonding time. If she isn't cooperative, then you may have to have your husband put her to bed, but I wouldn't do that unless it is a problem.

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S.R.

answers from Tulsa on

FOr yoru health, it is not good to go cold turkey. You can develop plugged ducts and mastitis ( a breast infection). However, you are correct, that it is probably habit and comfort for your child. You can try elminating a feeding at night/middle of the night by having dad get up with her, give her a cup of milk or water or try just cuddling her. I know dad may not be around at nap time, so you might try giving her a cup and cuddling her at nap time. Slowly cut out feedings, give lots of extra attention at other times adn cuddling. Get dad in on the act, that helps because he is not a reminder. To ease discomfort you can pump a little to prevent engorgement, also the slowly eliminating a feeding a week will help slowly reduce your supply. Many women have found the cabbage leaves for short periods of time work to help dry them up as well. Good Luck.
YOu might talk with a Le Leche League Leader- See www.llli.org and search for leader in Tulsa. There are 10 here and there are 3 different meetings offered. Also the book mentioned above- "how Weaning Happens" is an excellent book.
Good Luck

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L.B.

answers from Fayetteville on

I'd plan on being flexible so that if she feels stressed by the sudden withdrawal of this form of security that she's had all her life, you can offer it till she relaxes again and you can work with her to gradually decrease. This will be healthy for your breasts and minimize the risk for plugged ducts and mastitis, too.

There is a fantastic method described in detail in No-Cry Sleep Solution that deals with this exact same thing. Highly recommended! The woman is brilliant. What is her name...um, Elizabeth Pantley, I'm pretty sure. She has lots of great advice on all of the usual sleep issues, as well.

L.

PS nooo, don't wear anything tight or restrictive while weaning! This heightens your chances of plugged ducts and mastitis.

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K.B.

answers from Mobile on

I weaned my daughter at two months because of teeth. I didn't pump once I decided to stop breast feeding. I wore a slightly smaller sports bra when out of the house, and for a couple of hours throughout the day, I strapped cabbage leaves to my breasts. I know it sounds funny, and makes you feel like your in a weird exotic movie, but I stopped producing milk in under a week. Something about cabbage reduces fluid. It's also supposed to be good on adema (knees, ankles, ect).

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S.B.

answers from Oklahoma City on

I'd recommend you get a copy of "How Weaning Happens" by Diane Bengson, maybe from your local library? It goes through all the different ways and things that can happen and has lots of helpful tips. I would also just add that the slower you can go, as others have said, the easier it will be on you both...so dropping one feeding at a time, slowly, might work better for you both. You could also talk to a LLL leader, a good leader should be able to give you some tips and help but if you feel alienated by one of them then move on to another one. They WILL explain to you that you don't *have* to wean right now, and I certainly chose the "baby-led weaning" route and was very glad of it, but a good leader won't judge if you decide to do it anyway, just help you! Good luck~

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R.F.

answers from Fayetteville on

Have you gotten her used to a sippy cup? I just weened my youngest at 13 months, and the main thing that worried me was him still getting enough liquids. So before I completely weened him, I got him used to a sippy. I never did have to pump to release pressure, but we had begun slowly cutting back when he turned a year, so my body was used to it by the time he weened, but he is 14 months now, and I do still have milk. With my oldest I had to stop at 4 months, and still produced milk until he was 8 months old, so don't expect to quit producing right away.

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L.P.

answers from Jonesboro on

I didn't wean my kids until after they turned three. I bargained with them...but yours is a little too young to bargain with. I wouldn't go cold turkey, try taking out the nap time one for a two weeks, then make your husband put her to bed for the next two weeks. By then your milk should be gone..

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