What Makes You Have More Children If You Know You Wilexperience Morning Sickness

Updated on September 21, 2014
A.H. asks from Clearfield, UT
17 answers

MY husband and I are considering to have our last child. I have three already, My husband is not pushing me into it, he says it is up to me if we go for one more. My problem is I get morning sickness that basically is a 24 hours sickness. I don't vomit but i still feel miserable for the first trimester. But most of the woman around me keep having babies over and over and even though some experience bad morning sickness, they still go for it with their children just months apart! I dont want to be sick but I would like one more child, I am considering adoption but the work towards it is overwhelming to me. This question is for those women who I describe above, how do you do it? I am such a coward I guess. Please dont tell me about your pregnancies that goes without you even noticing anything different but getting a big tommy!!! that makes me feel to envious.

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❤.I.

answers from Albuquerque on

I had all day sickness with all my pregnancies. It wasn't only nausea though, I couldn't eat anything without vomiting until late afternoon for the first three months. I never really considered not getting pregnant because of the morning sickness because of what you have in the end, makes it all worth it. That is, if you actually do want another.

2 moms found this helpful

Y.M.

answers from Iowa City on

Because it is only a few months...

If one knows (or assumes) it will end after 3 months and then it will be smooth sailing then it just isn't that difficult to get through.

I had super complicated pregnancies so nausea without vomiting for three months would make for an easy pregnancy *for me*. But for *you* it might be more than you are up for and that is just fine...nothing wrong with saying no.

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R.B.

answers from Dallas on

I had 24 hour "morning sickness" through second trimester of all 3 of mine. I think it's the knowledge that it is temporarily whereas your child is forever.

5 moms found this helpful
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D.D.

answers from Pittsburgh on

You have to decide if you can really do it again.
I'm sure there are women who decide they are willing to do it again for another child. There are plenty of us out there who also thought we might have more kids, but had pregnancy/childbirth/newborn stages that were so rough that we changed our minds, and decided that we are happy and complete with what we've got, because it's not worth risking going through that again.

I know several women who thought they might want more in theory, before they actually experienced pregnancy and childbirth, but decided it wasn't worth rolling the dice again, once they had first hand experience with it. Only you can decide where you stand on this.

3 moms found this helpful
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S.H.

answers from Santa Barbara on

I sometimes think people/women forget exactly how miserable it was to be pregnant.

Right now it has been awhile and I think it is no big deal to have another. If I actually sat down and thought about my pain/lack of sleep I would realize I was miserable.

I guess my advice would be to think of the positives and try not to dwell on the negative. It will not last forever.

p.s. I am happy with 2 kids and do not plan to have more.

2 moms found this helpful

D.D.

answers from New York on

I had vomiting for all 9 months of all 3 of my pregnancies. In addition I had sciatic pain that made it hard to walk with my last 2 pregnancies. Why did I have more than 1 child? Because I figured that worst case was I'll be sick for 9 months and have trouble walking too but at the end I'll get a beautiful baby and to me it was worth it.

2 moms found this helpful
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S.B.

answers from Kansas City on

I have 2, and I knew my morning sickness was pretty bad the first time. I knew I wanted another, and I knew morning sickness wasn't forever. I would sit at my desk at work, feeling miserable, sucking on Gin-Gins ginger candy, and thinking "this is just a moment in your life, it will be over soon" which is pretty much my mantra whenever anything painful (like labor pains or a stubbed toe or the shingles I had when I was pregnant) is going on. It sucks for a few months, but the end result is what is important. I wouldn't trade either of my kids for the world. I had gestational diabetes with the second and not eating cake and checking my blood sugar 4 times a day was hard, but it was all worth it when they put my son in my arms. The worst for me was the shingles, since I couldn't take any hard core pain meds for it and it hurt like nothing else I've ever felt.

I have a friend I know wants another, but she has the terrible, all pregnancy all the time sickness and she doesn't want to go through that again. I don't blame her one bit. It's different for everyone, everyone has a different threshold of what they can take.

2 moms found this helpful
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M.C.

answers from Detroit on

Couple things:

Preparation and planning are the key to managing this situation. If you want a fourth child bad enough and you know that there is a good possibility that you will suffer from morning sickness, you need to get your ducks in a row before getting pregnant. I had terrible morning sickness with my last one, so I get where you are coming from. Since you have three children, how would you handle the daily upbringing of these children if you get pregnant again and end up sick every day? Do you have someone that can step in and take over caring for your family when you are unable to? Talk to your doctor before getting pregnant. Ask the doctor what medications are available to help with morning sickness. Natural remedies?

Also, every pregnancy is different. Maybe this one won't be so bad? Think positive. It's always good to prepare for the worse and hope for the best. Sometimes, it's just best to go for it and let the chips fall where they may. Pregnancy is a temporary state. Once you give birth, that baby is your life....all worth it in the end.

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E.M.

answers from Phoenix on

Morning sickness is the worst!! I have said many times that I would do labor twice if I could skip the morning sickness!!
I agree with others- the thing that kept me going through my second pregnancy was knowing it would end eventually. I also took it a day at a time, as cliche as that sounds. I couldn't think about the weeks and months of sickness ahead, I just focused on keeping as healthy as I could on any given day.

1 mom found this helpful

J.S.

answers from St. Louis on

Three months of a lifetime doesn't seem all that bad. I have friends who had to be hospitalized their morning sickness was so bad but they have multiple kids.

My first was nothing, my second I lost 30 pounds I was throwing up so much, the last two were in between. It is just three months, no big deal.

1 mom found this helpful

B.C.

answers from Norfolk on

Although some women have morning sickness every time they are pregnant, every pregnancy is different.
Some women will be fine with one pregnancy and sick as a dog with the next, and fine again with the one after that.
You just never know exactly what you are going to get or when you are going to get it.
Having a baby is always a bit of a gamble and a leap of faith.
It's up to you to decide if you want to take that leap again.
If it's going to be your last - at least you'll know you'll have one more go and THEN never go through it again!

1 mom found this helpful

V.B.

answers from Jacksonville on

Like RA B, I think it has to do with the knowledge that it has an end.

I actually was sick like you describe for the entirety of the pregnancy. Until I went into labor (which was past the 40 week due date). It was miserable. The doctor said that it isn't a guarantee that it would happen with future pregnancies... still, we waited 2 years. My second pregnancy was worse than the first... sick every single day until day of delivery... only she came a week before due date. I had to go on Zofran to be functional during the the first trimester and part of the second.

After that, we were done. It wasn't a matter of not wanting to be sick, but rather a matter of there being no way to manage our day-to-day lives if I were as sick with a third pregnancy as I was with either of the first. We had to send our first born to stay with relatives for part of the 2nd pregnancy (before I went on Zofran) because I could not take care of him. I couldn't function. You can't be like that and have a toddler and a 5 year old running loose in the house.

But during the darkest days, knowing that it would go away after the baby arrived just made delivery day that much sweeter.

The question it seems is what do YOU want? You haven't said whether you are willing to endure for one more. That's up to you. Your choice. If you can't face it, then you can't. No shame in that. Adopt if you would still like more kids and can't face the misery of round the clock nausea again.

For some people it gets worse with each pregnancy. So know that before you decide. There are no guarantees either way--you might not be sick at all, or it could be worse... pregnancies are not all the same.

Only you can decide. What is tolerable for someone else is just what is tolerable for someone else. Not what YOU should do or not do.

How does your husband feel about adoption if you don't want to endure another pregnancy? You didn't mention that. Something to add to the mix when you are deciding whether you want another child, when that might mean sickness or adoption to attain another child.

1 mom found this helpful
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H.G.

answers from San Francisco on

It's only a few months. I made tons of frozen meals and meal plans before I had my last. I got the house ready to be on autopilot, and I literally just stayed in bed until I felt well enough to get up again. I planned out daily nap times, and every one knew to not call or disturb me between set hours.

Yes, it's an awful few months, but it's only bed few months for a lifetime of joy.

1 mom found this helpful

C.C.

answers from San Francisco on

I think if you have three children already, you tell your husband you're not willing to be sick 24/7 for another 9 months. My first child, I was sick for the first 13 weeks straight. I couldn't keep any food down. I waited 2 years before reluctantly agreeing to have another. I was sick off and on with that one (not nearly as bad as the first). I refused to have a third.

If you're reluctant to have a fourth child, don't have a fourth child. Enough already. Your husband will live with "only" three. You could look into fostering babies/children if you really long for more children, but can't deal with another pregnancy. There are many children out there who need a loving family.

1 mom found this helpful
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T.M.

answers from Tampa on

To each their own. I had nasty morning sickness through part of each of my pregnancies. I worked full time so it was really difficult to get through. I worried about the 2nd pregnancy, but we really wanted another so we went for it. The 2nd one seemed much harder because I was running after a toddler the whole time. We probably would have stopped at 2 anyway...that was always the plan. However, I just could not imagine being that sick and running after two kids and working full time. That seemed to be beyond my ability to cope...

1 mom found this helpful
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G.B.

answers from Oklahoma City on

I puked at least once per day for 8 1/2 months. I feel your pain. If I could have had other children I would have done it in a flash.

I wanted a big family. I have a brother 15 years older and a sister 11 years older. So I grew up as if I were an only child. It was lonely.

I never wanted my daughter to be an only child but that's how it worked out.

If you want more children it's only a few months out of your life that will be uncomfortable. That could be your mantra...lol.

1 mom found this helpful
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C.N.

answers from Baton Rouge on

I hated being pregnant - morning sickness that lasted all day, having to pee every five minutes, backache, hemorrhoids the size of grapes, belly out to next week. Hated it so much that when my daughter was born, I swore I would never go through that again. And I never did.

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