What's the Deal with Natural Childbirth ?

Updated on May 14, 2010
S.B. asks from Gainesville, FL
75 answers

I'll be 33 weeks this week, and as the day gets closer I have more and more people ask me if I'm going to do it natural . To me, I don't understand the big deal. Does a natural childbirth make you more of a woman or something ? I always reply that when the time comes if it hurts more than I can bear I'm getting pain meds, and I don't think it's a big deal at all but it seems many people do ? I even watched a show on maternity ward where this girls mother was so pissed that she got an epidural that she left the room because the mother wanted her to have a natural birth. I mean it's still natural, right ? The baby's still coming out how its supposed to regardless of if you feel all the pain right ? I know there are risks with the epidural and all, but I guess I just don't get it.

What can I do next?

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L.A.

answers from Chicago on

I went into my first delivery with the option to get meds, if I needed them. My labor progressed fast, so by the time I was ready for meds it was to late.

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K.S.

answers from Minneapolis on

Ahhh...The cult of motherhood.

Hate Hate Hate the ubiquitous use of "natural" because it infers that my two beautiful boys are "unnatural". I have very good, very caring, very open minded friends who when it comes to the subject of childbirth can get downright cave-woman about it. That the more pain, the more tearing, the longer the labor...The higher the mother's status is in the tribe.

I just smile and re-direct by saying something like, "Oh - I remember the day Betsy was born too. She was just the tiniest, sweetest thing ever. You are so lucky." Because in the end (IMO) the baby is the blessing...Not its mode of delivery.

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R.H.

answers from Colorado Springs on

I'm someone who has had one epidural (my son with IUGR needed to be induced) and all my rest unmedicated, and two homebirths----

The difference between natural and medicated for the laboring woman? With an epidural, all the pain is *after* birth. You may go through part of your labor pain-free, but once that epidural wears off at the end then suddenly e.v.e.r.y.t.h.i.n.g HURTS. A lot.

When you have unmedicated childbirth, it's your labor that hurts, and once that baby comes out you are so gosh darn happy and thrilled to have them OUT that the pain of recovery feels like mosquito bite.

In other words, it is going to hurt, whether you get an epidural or not. Natural childbirth significantly alters the perception of the pain you have during your recovery period, but you pay for it in doing labor unmedicated, lol. Having the epidural will spare you that pain but it really does make the recovery period feel worse. So, pick your poison, IMHO.

So, between the drugs that make it to and through the baby's system, the fact that epidurals put you at higher risk of additional interventions and c-sections, plus the fact that the risk for fetal distress is much higher with an epidural (part of the reason the c-section rate is higher), I'd rather skip on the epidural and on induction and deal with labor. When I had a medically indicated reason for needing both, I did it without guilt or regret. And my natural childbirths have ranged from gentle, peaceful, virtually pain free ones to the absolute horrors of back labor and shoulder dystocia that I would never wish on the world's most evil human being. It's not about a "childbirth medal" or feeling like I am somehow great or special......it's simply about my personal comfort level with various risks and my personal desire (after have two births to compare the difference) to rather deal with the pain and perception of pain on the front end rather than the recovery end.

Your body, your baby, your birth. :) Births are like snowflakes--- each are unique and individual and no one can make a judgment on what makes for a desired birth and an undesired birth experience except for you. My personal birth experiences have given me some very strong opinions on the subject, but they're all mine and I would never judge another woman's desires for her birth based on mine.

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J.R.

answers from Los Angeles on

Here's the deal: no matter how you give birth, short of being totally knocked out from the first stages of labor to the week or so after (or longer), IT HURTS.
Pilots have a saying that any landing you can walk away from is a "good landing"... my OB told me that when I had to have an emergency C-section. And she was RIGHT. By the way, after the epidural. surgery, etc, my daughter still scored 9s. My other kids did, too. No difference.

Do what feels right for you, but don't imagine you can control all the pain with meds or even breathing or massage, etc. Remind yourself often that your BODY knows how to do this, even if your brain doesn't yet, and if you just go with it, you can let your body do its job and have a healthy baby! Good luck!

One more thing: I know you didn't ask for opinions about what YOU should do, just an explanation of why some women think they know better, are stronger, whatever. Guess what? It only gets worse from here: every parent knows "better" than you about how to raise YOUR CHILD! You might as well learn now to ignore the do-gooders, nags and negative neds, and just do what you know is right for your own family! :-)

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K.M.

answers from Boston on

Isn't it funny that people ask this question about childbirth but not about dental work? And men don't ask it at all. "Hey Ralph, are you going to have that filling replaced without novicaine? That's what real men do, and what's more, it's a really fulfilling experience!"

What shall we call it, mamachisma?

We can have these debates about "how much pain is the right amount" because we have been able to forget how dangerous delivering babies was historically, and still is in places where care is not so good. Instead of having to deal with the big picture, we get all caught up in details which would have seemed absurd 100 years ago (and still are, in parts of the 3rd world.)

Labor varies dramatically from woman to woman and even between pregnancies for the same woman. Nobody can tell you whether it's going to hurt a little or a lot. There are risks with an epidural, but they pale compared to the more general risks associated with delivery in general such as eclampsia and abruption. The decision to choose whether or not to get a painkiller is really pretty trivial in the big picture -- more important than what PJ's to wear, but less important that deciding whether to have a child in the first place, or whether an emergency C-section will be required. Those decisions have bearing on the outcome, whereas the painkillers are just a part of the process.

I wish for you a healthy and beautiful baby, served up any way you like.

Cheers

K

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V.W.

answers from Jacksonville on

I went into it with the desire to go without meds (why complicate and medicate if you can go without?) but expressly telling my doc and husband, that if I changed my mind and the stress/pain was more than I could handle, I wanted drugs. My doctor noted my chart just that way... that I was going to "try" no meds, with the options still on the table.

Well, by the time things were to the point that I didn't want to deal anymore... the "I can't bear this any more" stage... (which is the shortest stage of all and goes really fast right at the end) it was too late to administer an epi. I suspect my doc knew this might be my situation... but I also think he had a "feel" for my personality and whether I would handle it okay. (Which I did, and in retrospect I am glad I had no medicine!) I have a rather high tolerance for pain... and I'm sure my doctor figured that out when I had been in his office having non-stress tests (and having contractions during the test that dilated me up to 2cm or 3cm a week ahead of delivery) and the nurses asked me "do you feel that?" and I said "feel what?" They told me I was having contractions.. and I had to see them on the display thing to know it.

Anyway. I went into pregnancy #2 with the same attitude. Same thing happened. And I was very happy with the way it went. The really bad pain only lasted a couple of minutes, then it was time to push and she was out in 2 pushes. I would have spent 15 minutes of agony (bent with my back humped over getting a needle stuck in my spine not being able to move when I needed to be taking deep breaths- plus the risks of the actual procedure itself) to avoid about 5 minutes of terrible but yet manageable pain.

The thing is, in my opinion, to educate yourself (and your partner) on ALL your options and potential scenarios. If you haven't taken a childbirth class yet, do it. Find one that doesn't focus solely on "natural" childbirth, but also gives you a lot of information on the different medications you might be offered or may ask for, and what to expect not just in a "normal" delivery, but in one that gets complicated. ANY birth could end up in a C-section if there are complications. And you need to know what to expect if that happens. Did you know that you may be given an oxygen mask to wear? Did you know that before you can get the epidural, you must take in (via IV) a full bag of fluid first? Did you know that you can have a "spinal headache" for several days AFTER the epidural sometimes? (just happens to some people... not b/c of error on the anesthesiologists part). Did you know that some women have side reactions to some of the medication options (itching all over being one)?
There is a lot of information out there. Do your research on all the side effects and potentialities. You may not need any of it. Or you may wish you knew ALL of it. Knowledge is power.
Don't stress over your method of delivery. Do your research and go from there.
Congrats on your pending birth!

P.S.
After reading some of the other responses, I realized something else that I am grateful for in having not had meds and interventions... the extra people in the room. 95% of my labor and delivery.. was just me and my husband in the room. Yes, a nurse would come in periodically and check on me and yes my doc did too. And near the end he stayed in the room and filled out part of the birth certificate... haha. Until the pushing stage, it was pretty much me and hubby. But I am a private person, and would have freaked to have had a room full of "extras" in there. Whew... hadn't really even thought about THAT aspect!

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J.B.

answers from Atlanta on

For some people it does seem to be some kind of competition, and they seem to think they're more of a woman for giving birth naturally. Not for me! To be honest epidurals skeeze me out a bit, so for my first I was going to stick with an IV drip of narcotics and no epi until the back labor started (never planned to go completely natural)! The epi stopped it, but didn't deaden anything else. For my second, I had a WONDERFUL epidural that made the entire experience near blissful! I'm sure you've heard this, but do all of these women who act like you're a lesser person for having drugs or an epi get all of their dental work done with no medication? Do they have surgery without anesthesia? NO. I don't get it either. Many will tell you your baby and you will feel doped up and foggy, but both of my babies scored 9s on their APGARs and I didn't feel any more groggy than anyone else who had been in pain, pushed, rolled around and thrashed for hours!

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S.B.

answers from Kansas City on

I had a friend who asked me if I felt like I missed out on something by getting an epidural. I said "yeah, a lot of pain."

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C.M.

answers from Austin on

There is one thing in common with all mothers, regardless how you give birth. You go home with a baby. I don't get the whole "I must be natural" thing, but whatever works for others......well, they are welcome to it. Don't try to reason it out. Everyone is entitled to their own birth "experience".

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T.C.

answers from Los Angeles on

The issue with "drugged birth" is that you are giving your baby a high dose of drugs. Women go through their whole pregnancy being careful of drugs and alcohol and then that goes out the window on the day of the birth. We know epidural drugs cross the placenta and can cause problems. Check out this article from www.mothering.com
http://www.mothering.com/pregnancy-birth/epidural-epidemic

I used hypnobirthing for both of my births and found that labor was not painful as you see on tv and movies. The more painful you think it will be, the worse it will be. Having said that, I have never experienced back labor, as I hear it can be unbearable.

Good luck in whatever you choose to do!

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K.E.

answers from Spokane on

Hi S.,

I hate the emphasis that women put on NATURAL childbirth. My last one was without drugs, because I didn't get to the hospital in time! Believe me, I wanted that epidural! I am planning on doing my next one at home, but as the time comes close, I feel a little fear creeping in. When people ask me about it, I just smile and say that I have a plan, but I am keeping my options open. I do what works for me! You're not more of a woman if you do it without drugs. There are a million factors that come into play, like your personal pain tolerance, whether you have adequate support, fatigue level, hydration level, blah blah....the list goes on and on. So just do what works for you. I didn't feel any different after the birth of my last baby that I did after my other ones. Make a plan, but keep your options open. I refuse to be made to feel like I'm less or more of a woman based on how I give birth! People do the same thing with the whole breastfeeding issue, and it's really aggravating! You should just tell people you're planning on giving birth in a tree with monkeys...Lol.

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J.S.

answers from Minneapolis on

That's a good honest question :)

I had one with the epidural, then two more each without (water births). My epidural birth was not what I wanted, so I opted to try it different the next two times. I preferred to go "natural" but all 3 were vaginal, and I was pretty proud of myself each time for just getting them out!

For me, the biggest thing was feeling out of control with the epidural. I am someone who likes to be in control of what's happening to me, and when I got the epidural it led to pitocin, and many more interventions (and nearly a C-Section. Thankfully I had a good nurse who figured out that I was dehydrated). Anyway, I didn't like all the people in the delivery room doc, nurses (3), med students (3), epidural man and his student. Seriuosly, there were 10 people in the room when my first was born and I felt completely out of control of the situation.

With my next two, by limiting the things I had going on (no drugs, no Doc - just the midwife and nurse) it was a calmer situation, and I was able to focus and relax and concentrate much better. Yes it hurt without the epidural (my first was totally pain free - but recovery was much worse). But by a day or two later, it was totally gone and I felt great. It took my 10 days to feel better after the first one.

It's your baby, your body, you do what you want. If you trust your doc., and your labor goes smoothly, an epidural can be a good tool.

Congratulations on your baby!
J.

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A.F.

answers from St. Cloud on

Great question and some AWESOME answers! I loved the response with the airplane landing analogy. Fantastic!

I was a "natural nazi" before I had my son. I had my birth plan prepared, my distrust of doctors firmly in place, loudly declared that I was NOT having a c-section or episiotomy and GOD FORBID that I would have any pain meds.

Well, thanks to my hue and cry against the establishment, my son almost died from the most traumatic birth my doctor had ever been a part of. I pushed him out after 5 hours and then they rushed to get him breathing. I finally had an intrathecal and nubain because I was passing out from 2 days of hard labor. It all wore off about 12 hours before I started pushing but I was so happy to see the anesthesiologist that I told him he was beautiful. :)

I CANNOT fault my doctor. My own foolishness put my son at risk. Go figure that I planned on having meds with my second and didn't need them!

Mama, you are a hero no matter what the circumstances of the birth! Don't let anyone make you feel like less of a woman or less of a mama! You will know what is right for you.
Take care!

OOPS! I forgot the whole point of my story is that I WISH I had gotten a c-section so my son didn't have to nearly die. I am so thankful he is alive and THAT is all that matters!

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A.S.

answers from Denver on

It takes roughly six weeks for the epidural drugs to leave a baby's system. So, yeah, to me it was important to have a drug free, intervention free birth eg "natural". But that's me, I also avoided alcohol, ultrasounds and drugs because it was important to me to have a drug free child. Gl you you in your decision.

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L.D.

answers from Minneapolis on

The biggest benefit from natural childbirth is being able to say to your 20-something child, "I went through 20 hours of labor and suffered without drugs, so you can...[insert mother's worst nightmare here]!

Whatever. Let people make conversation. All childbirth HURTS. All childbirth has risks. Deliver. Have your story. When you are able to get a good night's sleep (about one year from now), you'll be able to tune out some of the more mindless comments.

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T.L.

answers from Tallahassee on

you need to watch "the business of being born". having an epidural and injecting drugs into you and your unborn baby is not natural. when giving birth in the hospital, the most like force of action is that you are not laboring as fast as they want you out of that room. so they will give you pitocin which will actually make the labor slower and more painful. then you will want an epidural due to the pain. you still won't be laboring fast enough and now you have 2 drugs in your system that are not natural and that will affect your unborn child. the likelihood of the doctors pushing for a c-section for them to make it home for dinner on time are much higher now. yes, the baby still comes out, but the likelihood of using forceps to pull him/her out or having a c-section or have a reaction from the unneeded drugs are higher now. why not give your child the best entrance into this world, the way god intended, the way our bodies were made and built to do minus all the medical unnecessities?

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V.B.

answers from Houston on

I had epidurals with both of my kids because they were both induced. My daughter was over a week late and they didn't want her to get too big. She was also having some issues with her heart rate, so they induced. I was a little upset with myself that I let them talk me into inducing my son. They did it a week early (under the guise, that again, he was getting too big) and I feel like I was robbed a little of that feeling of "going into labor" on my own. But, the bottom line is that I had 2 healthy children and I was able to labor with my 2nd until the pain just got to be too intense from the pitocin. I'm not sure why people have to be so judgemental about motherhood, especially birth and breastfeeding. I fully believe that breastfeeding is the best thing for a baby and I nursed both of my kids for 10 months each (they both self weaned around this time), but I don't judge women who decide not to for whatever reason. I would try to encourage them through the tough parts, but if they don't want to nurse, who am I to say that their kids will suffer for it? Formula is a perfectly fine option as well. I was raised on formula and I'm still here to talk about it!

What you have to remember is that everyone has their belief system and you just have to be able to let it slide when people become belligerent about something they believe strongly in, but that you disagree with. You do what you are comfortable with for the birth of your child and don't let anyone discourage you! I decided to steer clear of the narcotics in the IV because I felt that it had the potential for more impact on the baby. The epidural didn't cause any issues with the baby (excessive drowsiness, etc). I did some research ahead of time and found it to be an acceptably safe option for me and my children. So, don't let anyone guilt you into doing anything you don't want to. It's YOUR decision and yours alone (okay, you might want to see what hubby has to say about it, but ultimately, he isn't the one pushing that thing out!). Best of luck to you!

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K.M.

answers from Miami on

Well, some of us are more afraid of huge needles in our spine than the pain of childbirth and opt to go unmedicated...(Like me. Twice!)

Honestly, I think people are just looking to make conversation with you. Like when you get asked if you know what you're having yet. (Yeah, a baby!) Or if you're going to breastfeed. (As long as people are going to touch your belly without asking, they may as well inquire about your boobs too, right?)

I agree though that it's "natural" if the baby's coming out vaginally. I think people confuse the words natural and unmedicated.

In defense of all the people that ask you though, there's only a 75% chance you'll get to have that baby vaginally anyway since the csection rate is about 25% nationally and even higher in some places. I live in south FL and Miami has about 30% or higher csection rate. So it wouldn't seem like such an odd question down here.

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K.S.

answers from Kansas City on

Right on, girl!! :) Congrtatulations on your pregnancy!! Have an epidural...they're great!! My epi wore off when it came time to push with my first and with my second it lasted, and my second delivery was so awesome, I was ready to deliver another if I could, lol!

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D.R.

answers from Fort Myers on

So, I wrote you a LONG response, but my internet blipped and it was all deleted-- SO, I'll give you a short short version. I have 3 children. 2 were born at a hospital with epidurals. One was induced with pitocin. I did what I thought was "normal" I did everything the doc and nurses said. Everything went well. I thought it was great that I didn't have to endure all the "hell" of active labor-- the doc just told me when to push and 3 pushes later, baby was out. The nurses took baby cleaned, measured, etc. and 30 mins later I got my baby. I did, however, feel disconnected from the whole process because, I didn't even know when to push. My husband was sleeping, my best friend was playing video games, my parents were on their cell phones making business calls. It was something that was happening to me, not something I was experiencing. At 34 weeks of my last pregnancy, I decided that I would trade my OB for a licensed midwife and give birth vaginally with no meds (I also, don't like the whole "natural" term) in a birthing tub at a birth center. It was an amazing experience. (side note: OMG, the birthing tub feels so good during contractions, it really helps ease pain and tension) I was able to nurse and bond with baby for 2 hours before any one took measurements, etc. I got to give baby her first bath instead of a nurse I'd only met 6 hours before. It was incredible and a life-changing, empowering experience. I do genuinely highly recommend it-- but don't let anyone pressure or bully you into anything you don't want to do. You are the only one that knows what is right for you and your baby. I do also recommend fully researching your options and side-effects and risks for all the different pain meds, sedatives, and anesthetics for both you and baby-- there are so many available, you can find the right one for you, or decide none at all. Have a wonderful birth experience and good luck with "the bullies", lol. Take care.

PS- Not ALL of us "Naturalites" are bullies

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R.M.

answers from Nashville on

I loved my epidural. :)

In my birthing classes, our teacher told us to do whatever would make the whole experience comfortable and better for us. She said "Everyone gets the same prize at the end, whether you do natural or not." (Surprisingly she always did natural with hers.) I just figured I'd go into it with an open mind.

My son came early and I wasn't dilated or effaced or even having contractions yet. But my water had been broken for 12 hours and they needed to speed things along and prepare for a c-section just in case. They ended up needing to give me tons of pitocin, and it was still down to the line on getting him out. They told me they HIGHLY recommended I get an epidural immediately because the pitocin was going to make the contractions really intense. The few that I felt while waiting to get it made it a pretty easy decision, and I had a perfect epidural that let me still feel things but not feel any pain. I was perfectly happy with how everything turned out, and don't regret missing out on my "natural childbirth medal" at all. Everyone has to do what makes them comfortable and happy. My son was healthy and we had no complications, that was what mattered to me.

Oh PS- my mom did her deliveries natural as was the norm then. She is a tough cookie and is usually the one to tell us that it is only as bad as we make it and you can do anything, that type of thing. Not "suck it up" but almost, just nicer. After being in both my sister's and mine's delivery rooms, she was like "Wow, those things are amazing! Why would anyone want to go through pain if you don't have to? You guys are so lucky these days" :)

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E.B.

answers from Boise on

Listen, I am all for you making the decisions that are right for *you*, as long as you have all the information to make a wise decision. That is, you should know the risks to you and your baby of various drugs and procedures.

That said, being a parent is hard work. When you have given birth without pain medications - and hopefully, having the preparation and support so that you are not in a great deal of pain, either - you have an amazing sense of accomplishment that is like finishing a marathon or climbing a mountain. You think to yourself, "if I could do that, I could do anything!" That sense of accomplishment will get you through many rough days and nights as a mother. Plus, you will know that you have given your baby the best start in life and will reduce your risk of having a c/s, breastfeeding problems, PPD, back pain, etc.

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M.G.

answers from Chicago on

I have to say, I feel the exact way you do. But, even with a c-section, it doesn't make you less of a woman or mother. I delivered my twins via a scheduled c-section. I even got the responses, "Your doctor isn't going to let you try to deliver them naturally?!" Well, my babies weighed 8 lbs, 7 oz and 7 lbs, 13 oz. I'm sorry, but when you've decided to push TWO babies out that are above average size, then you can talk to me about "natural" childbirth.

However your baby (or babies) comes into this world is a miracle.

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C.G.

answers from Augusta on

I think they are just making conversation. Also, some people mean vaginally when they say naturally.

As someone who had natural births my reasons for choosing that were to avoid the side effects of medications and the risks that are associated with them. I felt like I made an effort during pregnancy to eat well, take care of my body and avoid medication and that was something I wanted to continue throughout my labor. Also, the idea of not having the ability to control my legs and bladder was majorly bothersome to me! Natural birth isn't for everyone and it is painful for sure. Every woman has the right to choose what is best for them, the key is to be aware of the risks and benefits of your choices for you and baby and go from there.

By the way I also get cavities filled without pain meds- it doesn't hurt that bad and you don't have to deal with a numb mouth all day!

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T.A.

answers from Toledo on

I completely agree with Julie B. And as my doctor said to me...there will not be medals given out to those who deliver without having a epidural. Congratulations to those who do it without an epidural because they insisted on having a "natural" birth. I had my first without an epidural (not by choice) and it was an absolutely miserable experience and I pray that I never have to go through that again. My next two births were far more memorable because I had pain control. Bottom line....I have three beautiful children, and it doesn't matter how they got here!

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L.A.

answers from Austin on

You do what you want. Giving birth is not a contest..
I was willing to try natural with the agreement that if I changed my mind, I wanted the option for any and all meds available!.. LOL

I figured no one ever died from the pain of childbirth so I just wanted to see what it would be like..

It turned out that I was able to handle the discomfort. After it was over I turned to my husband and said, "Wow, I forgot to ask for anything." He responded "I know, I kept thinking you would ask at any moment!" The nurse asked "have you always had terrible cramps". I told her "yes, since I was 12".. She said , "that is why you were able to get through it".. Don't get me wrong. I lost my breath a few times from the pain, but my husband would distract me and get me back on track.

Our daughter was (3 weeks early) and so alert, when they placed her on my stomach, they asked "what is her name?" When I said her name, she pushed her legs and LIFTED and TURNED her head to look at me! She was alert form the moment she was born. I do not know if going without meds was one of the reasons, but I felt very accomplished.

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C.S.

answers from Miami on

Dear S.,

I didn't get it either before having my son. Unfortunately, what I've learned is that one intervention does lead to another and sometimes that path leads to c-section and all of the resulting complications. Once you have the epidural you are in bed. "Walking epidurals" do not mean that you can actually walk afterwards. You no longer have any ability to control your birthing position at that point.

Also, ALL pain medication does get to the baby. My son was induced (NEVER AGAIN) and after 24 hours of Cervadil, 18 hours of Pitocin and 6 hours of epidural he was born through c-section (don't let anyone tell you that it is not major abdominal surgery - it is and in virtually all developed countries except ours you get physical therapy afterwards to regain the use of your stomach muscles). He was literally in a drugged state for 3 days after birth - nearly impossible to keep awake - until after 3 days he cried for 7 hours straight. My pediatrician said it was likely the drug withdrawl. He never learned to latch so we didn't get to breastfeed despite trying for a month, three lactation consultants and unbelievable efforts.

I do think that every mother should choose what is right for her but it is definately best to be educated about what you are choosing. BTW, when we did our hospital tour (#2 is due in August) - the chief of anesthesia came and told us all that we should get either an epidural or spinal and that the medicine does not cross the placenta. That is a flat out lie - check the medical journals.

If you want to speak to someone - consider contacting your local ICAN of Gainesville chapter.

Good luck and Go GATORS! C.

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S.B.

answers from Tampa on

I once had an anesthesiologist laugh at me (I was at a Super Bowl Party) & I mentioned that I may try to "go natural"... He said, "I do NOT understand why some women feel that experiencing pain means "natural'... the goal is to have you enjoy the experience & not be unconscious like people were years ago' Walk as much as you can so they baby drops & when it hurts- get an epidural- enjoy watching the birth of your child rather than suffering in pain"...

I had worked as a labor coach & have watched 13 births- good, bad & ugly... I did research & chose to have an epidural. I require blood thinners throuot my pregnancy to stay pregnant- so I had to be induced anyway. I was fully prepared for 2 days of meds- he was born 7 hours after I received the cervidil.

People tell horror stories- Yes it hurts, yes, I am glad I had an epidural, but it is a personal choice.

By the way- my son was small (5 lbs) & latched immediately- he breastfed for 18 months- Never took a bottle/pacifier or thumb (so for us-meds did not affect his latching AT ALL!

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B.C.

answers from Norfolk on

I always planned to have an epidural. I'm just not into pain. A toothache is perfectly natural, but who would get a cavity filled without the Novocaine? My labor was 36 hours long. I was home with gradually stronger and stronger contractions from 5am and didn't go to the hospital till 7pm. It was 9pm before I got the epidural and I was almost in tears at that point and I was already exhausted. After the epidural, I actually got some sleep, and it was a good thing. It took a long time for me to fully dilate, and I had my son vaginally at 5pm the next day with only 1.5 hrs of pushing. 9 lb 1.5 oz with a lusty cry! If I hadn't been able to rest, I never would have had the strength to push and I would have ended up having a C-section. I've never had any back problems from the epidural. It went as flawlessly as anyone could hope for. A wonderful experience! The medicine never affected my baby. He had the highest APGAR score possible.

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S.S.

answers from Daytona Beach on

Really? I think it's just bragging rights. I went in thinking that i wasn't going to have any meds bc i was scared of a needle in my back. really freaked me out. anyway, my water broke, i had no contractions so they gave me pitocin. this was about 1am. the dr came in a few hours later, gave me an ultrasound and my daughter was breach so i had to have a c-section. so....had to have a needle in my back anyways. so many people are on the health wagon, which isn't a bad thing to make our kids healthier, but a lot of people take it overboard like so many do nowadays with so many things. i think that whatever works for you, do it. if i had my choice between "natural" childbirth and a c-section....i would definitely choose the c-section bc those few hours i had contractions, it was pretty painful.

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M.S.

answers from Philadelphia on

The drugs used during labor have negative effects on the baby. It is not about being "more of a woman" it is about making educated decisions abut your health and the baby's health. If you need to use pain medication, you should. But you should only do so knowing the negative effects, inlcuding but not limited to an increased chance for a c-section (major abdominal surgery), more difficulty with breastfeeding, more difficulity for baby transitioning including respiration problems. I think natural childbirth proponents get frustrated with the willingness of women to downplay or even blow-off the very serious risks. Also, there is very little focus on alternative pain relief measures and a quick reliance on drugs. As for me, I did not want drugged babies, so I did natural childbirth and am happy with my choice. you should make your own choices but please get educated about the risks and benefits of all of them.

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D.P.

answers from Pittsburgh on

Here's my opinion. Pain=Bad. Epidural=Good :-)

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S.H.

answers from Honolulu on

Just do what is right for you... not what the trendiness is.
If you want meds, have meds.
If you don't want it, then don't.
And you will never know how your birth will be, until that moment.
Don't do what others tell you to do, it is your birth, your moment, your body....

I was going to have a natural birth with my first child, then I had complications, then I had to have an emergency c-section. I had an Epidural.No biggie. I loved it!
Then my 2nd pregnancy, was a planned c-section. I did not want to do a VBAC (vaginal birth after c-section). No biggie.

Do what you want, not what others will think of you or tell you to do.

All the best,
Susan

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C.P.

answers from Provo on

I had a natural birth and it did nothing but hurt me lots. I am not into pain so the natural birth experience was not by choice. I was signed up and ready for an epidural last time and then the doctor found out I had to have a C section. I am sure that when the baby is 19 they won't look at you and say, "Mom, I am so glad that you chose natural child birth with me because I feel so much better!" No one really cares how you got the baby here just that you did.

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J.C.

answers from San Francisco on

The only "big deal" is that the drugs get in to the babies system. Just look in to the risks/benefits before actually going in to the hospital so you can have an educated decision. Remember this is YOUR child, you do what YOU feel is right, who cares what everyone else thinks!

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R.C.

answers from Sarasota on

Hi, S.!
I got so irritated with all those people who were in my business when I was pregnant! One lady at Publix kept asking how dilated I was. Finally my husband said I should tell her, "I don't know--why don't you check?"

First of all, I think the word "natural" should be banned from birth conversations. Vaginal means it wasn't a c-section. Unmedicated means you didn't have medication. 'nuff said.

I believe every woman is entitled to good, accurate information--all the information, not just what the doctor thinks will get you to do what they want! I think that the biggest problem with our system is that some women trust doctors who then push them into something OR don't give them accurate information/useful support, and then those women end up feeling disappointed/conned/betrayed and/or depressed by their birth experience.

If you have a good relationship with a good doctor or midwife, if you have the support you need and feel confident in your choices--now and in labor--then you choose what you want!

One piece of information that not a lot of people mention is that the worst part of labor, called transition, is usually from 7-10 cm (although it often starts earlier) and it's usually the shortest part. This is the part where ALL women at least think, "I can't do this." But if you hold on, then you are ten and you can push. If you are coached to push effectively (not flat on your back), then that part is much better than transition!

I, personally, decide that I didn't like the risk of the drugs. I didn't want to take a chance that my baby absorbed them, and I didn't want to take a chance that they would mess with my labor and cause more interventions. My 7 lb 9 oz daughter was born after 6 hours of active labor (and a few complications unrelated to use/not use of medication) and then two hours of pushing without medication. My 9 lb 8 oz son was born after two hours of active labor and a half hour of pushing without medication. I have to say that his birth was fun! Yes, AMAZINGLY difficult (I remember screaming that there has to be a better way :-), but I loved it.

That's me, though--I just wanted to put my stories out there for your consideration. You get the information you want, make your decision, and only let people who support you be around you at this point!

Happy baby!

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J.R.

answers from Ocala on

I have done it both ways... first baby, they started my epidural before they induced me... second baby, born less than 20 minutes after I got to the hospital, no time for any meds...

I have to say that the epidural is the way to go, for me anyways. Yes, I survived, I did it on my own without anything for pain, but not by choice. If I were to get pregnant again, I would absolutely go for the epidural again.

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J.C.

answers from Fort Wayne on

that's so funny!!!! I DON'T get it either! I've always said "why in the heck would a woman WANT to suffer through tons of pain when they don't HAVE to?????" I personally think it's kinda like a badge of honor to them, makes them look like they are more of a woman. I have nothing against it at all, I just seriously think it gives them something to say for the rest of their lives. I knew going in that I was for SURE going to get the epidural. I mean, if a person says "we have two options. With one, you get a shot and will only feel pressure, not pain. With the other, it will feel like your vagina is being pulled out through you." .....seriously, people still say "oh, I'll just deal wtih it?" Woah....... I say, why have it hurt when it doesn't have to?

I'm sorry, I am laughing right now because of the woman saying babies of moms with epidurals are said to not latch on.......I totally forgot that having a shot in your back can completely affect your boobs and your baby!!! jk

Also, right after getting stitched up after I delivered my babies, I got up and WALKED to the bathroom, so don't believe those women who say with epidurals, you can't walk around

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K.F.

answers from Salinas on

Hi- I can't read all the responses but I had 2 home births and know a lot about this subject. I researched a ton before we made our decision and it was one of the best decisions my husband and I ever made. Honestly having drugs in the baby's system is only part of it. The truth is the more medical interventions used from epidural, to fetal monitor, labor inducement and not letting the Mom move around during labor increases the chance you will end up with a c-section. When you cannot feel your body well you are not able to be as effective at pushing. One blip of the monitor and you're wisked off to the OR. Inducing labor can bring on very strong contractions and making a woman lay down while in labor often makes the pain worse. Docotors and hospitals are VERY concerned with liability, if they do not intervene and something happens they will get sued. They do not care one bit about how you feel after it's over, just that everyone is alive and healthy. For me that was just not enough. There are just so many things that come into play with a medicated, hospital birth that do not when people let nature take its course. There are a million different stories and people have such strong feelings about this but it's wrong to boil it down to drugs in the baby's system, it's much more complicated than that. Anyone really interested should spend a little time online and find out for themselves. The way most Americans have their babies is NOT more safe than many other countries where doing it at home or naturally in a birth center is the norm. Of course there are many women who have high risk pregnancies and the hospital is the best place for them but generally speaking giving birth is not a medical emergency it's one of the most natural processes in the world.
PS- Just read a few of the replies and I have to say to the people who say it doesn't matter after it's over SPEAK FOR YOURSELF. If you did not have a natural childbirth without drugs then you cannot know what it feels like. For me it still matters with my kids 7 and 11 years old. I will carry the confidence and strength I gained from those births until the day I die and it prepared me in a absolutely perfect way for the much more difficult role of lifelong parenting.

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H.S.

answers from Cincinnati on

I think it's "earthy" mothers who are in all walks of life medication free. It's not just the birthing process. I'm certain there's a lot of pain involved, but afterwards, there's no numbness. They can get up and walk around freely if they need, rather than lay in bed. I had to have 2 c-sections. However, I would've gotten the epidural, for sure :)

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O.M.

answers from Minneapolis on

Lots of good answers already, but a couple of analogies below bother me. Having dental work or surgery done is addressing a problem or issue with your body and the work is highly invasive and not a "natural" process itself. Childbirth is not an illness or an ailment to be treated--our bodies were built to do this and the pain is a result of a good, productive, propertly functioning female body. I had a drug-free birth, though I kept my options open since I didn't know what my pain threshold would be. In the end, the pain didn't overcome my fear of needles, tubes, numbness and interventions and my labor moved along at a good pace so I did it without. I didn't expect a medal, I didn't do it to be macho, but I am glad I got to see what it was like and wouldn't have done anything differently. I'm not judging anyone else's use of drugs. To echo a few other comments below, I do recommend watching "The Business of Being Born" for some interesting information and perspectives. And do educate yourself fully on all of your options before you get to the hospital so that you don't have to evaluate pain med options while working through contractions, and so you are also prepared to handle a med-free birth if time doesn't allow any meds. I also agree that recovery can be painful and I was irritated that they were willing to give me narcotics when the baby was in me and sharing my blood supply, but offered nothing more than ibuprofen once the baby was out of me! I had some stitches and overall body pain from the exertion of pushing out a baby (which I would have had either way, epi or not) and terrible hemerrhoids and the ibu just wasn't cutting it, but nope, no good drugs then. Anyway, I wish you the best of luck, just keep an open mind and do what is best for you!

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S.W.

answers from Miami on

People can be stupid, arrogant and opinionated.
Childbirth hurts.
You do what you feel/know is right for you.
God Bless and may you have a healthy baby.
(And an easy birth experience)
You and husband are going to be so IN LOVE!!!

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S.G.

answers from Miami on

I got that question a lot when I was pregnant too. Most were really asking if I was delivering vaginally or by C-Section but felt awkward about saying the v-word. So, I would turn the question around and ask them "are you asking if I'm going to have a C-Section"? Usually their answer was yes, and my easy answer was, then, yes, I am delivering naturally. I also chose to have an epidural, being highly allergic to pain, but the beauty of this whole thing is that every mom gets to choose for themselves.

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J.K.

answers from Tampa on

Welcome to parenthood! There are always people who will judge you and your decisions. Some will tell you right to your face that they think your choices are poor, others will tell other people behind your back. Try to grow a thick skin and remember that you're doing whatever you feel is right for your child/family/self. (Mine is usually in that order.)

Talk to your doctor and see what the possible consequences are to natural vs. medication. Then make a decision that's best for you and your child.

And remember never to say NEVER! It's hard to tell what you'd do if you were in someone else's shoes!

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K.M.

answers from Tampa on

When you take drugs they go to your baby.

I am sure that you have done alot to make sure you have a healthy baby, and this is another thing for your baby.

The woman who left her daughter because of the epidural is a jerk. If you need it again that is your decision as the mom.

I'd quit answering the question, tho, it is very personal, and why do folks think you have to answer?

The thing I have seen makes the most difference is getting chiropractic adjustments- the Intl Chiropractic Pediatric Assn can give you a referral.

Best, k

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M.R.

answers from Chicago on

People need to find a way to feel better about themselves and their decisions, so they'll stop at nothing to try and put down people who "don't do it right".

Let me tell you...it won't be long after the birth that no one on this planet will give a freaking hoot over how you did it. Do they ask it before kindergarten? No! Is it part of the college admissions process? No! Will you be denied entrance in to heaven because you "didn't do it good enough"? No!

I had to be induced with both children and chose an epidural each time. To me, that's completely normal and NATURAL to want pain management if you would like!

No one gets a better prize for how they deliver - we all get our baby no matter how he/she comes out!

Oh, and despite "taking the easy way" I still felt a great sense of accomplishment...

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S.B.

answers from Kansas City on

I have to say, I couldn't figure out the "natural" craze either. I dutifully took Lamaze classes, and the teacher really pushed the idea. So I read about it. I couldn't see what was so much better, unless you just feel right about it or want the experience. You should know, my husband is an anesthesiologist, and I do not get the impression the only thing doctors care about is liability. They care about their patients being in PAIN. I would not have a tooth pulled without pain control, and I feel the same about having a baby. All that said, my baby had a large head, and I DID end up with a C-section. And I have to say, it was great! My baby is fine, and I didn't ruin anything pushing him out. (ask around there are tons of moms who pee when they laugh or sneeze, and worse--my mom had issues with sex forever after 3 kids). Maybe I could have pushed him out, but it doesn't make much difference to me. I think it is fine if others wish to do it "natural," but the fact is that epidural meds stay in your spine, do not enter your child, and data does not support better outcomes with natural vs pain-controlled. So do what seems best to you, and talk it over with your doctor. Best wishes!!

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L.O.

answers from Detroit on

Halleluiah sister.. labor hurts.. no doubt about.. they say it is like menstrula cramps.. but no cramps I have ever had inmy life..

I had 2 kids and 2 epidurals.. the epidural take the pain away and the experience ismuch more pleasant..I would never congratulate someone who had a tooth pulled or a tonsilectomy with no drugs.. it is not a badge of courage of how much pain you can take... with or without drugs you just want a healthy baby..

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C.P.

answers from Miami on

It's each person's choice. I had a wonderful drugless labor in the water and the water amazingly took the pain and pressure away. I never once wished I would have had one either. I wouldn't do it any other way especially because research has shown that babies of mothers with epidurals don't latch on as well. Childbirth is a natural thing and our bodies were made to do it. Good luck!

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I.!.

answers from New York on

Seriously - what is it about being pregnant that people think they can ask the most inappropriate questions ever!!!

We had someone, a guy none the less, asking us some pretty personal questions. You know how my husband responded "Hey [insert name], how big is your d!ck?". He was flabbergasted. Then my husband said "Pretty inappropirate, huh?". Needless to say, he got the message!

Girlfriend, you do what you need/want to do. I didn't get a chance to read all of the responses here. But I'm sure it is pretty safe to say that some are saying go drug free, others are saying get the epi. Really, in the end it is all on you...not on your dr, not on your husband, but you. You are the one delivering this baby.

Drug free, pain medication, c-section - the end result is a baby.

Best of luck to you!

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☼.S.

answers from San Diego on

Everyone thought I was nuts to go natural, but I had my reasons. First, I didn't want to end up having a C-section. If you have an epidural, there is a greater chance you'll have one because you can't feel your bodies' natural urge to push. After 23 hours of being in labor in the hospital (should you go that long), most doctors will require you to have a C-section. Second, I was absolutely dedicated to breastfeeding and having an epidural makes it difficult for baby to latch after birth. Those were my reasons, and I stuck to them. I'm happy to say that I didn't have to have a C-section, and I successfully nursed my daughter for two years. Good luck w/ whatever you choose!!

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L.W.

answers from Boston on

do the best you can and trust your instincts. My plan was lets see how it goes. I was induced and once labor started I lasted 6 hours, then I had pain meds. After about 9 hours my new night nurse thought I had too many meds and cut them off. I then had 5 hours of hell followed by a c section.
My advice is experience as much as the birth as you can handle, maybe it will be the whole thing- maybe it won't. It will be your experience, maybe your baby will be born in 5 hours maybe 24 who knows? You don't so how can you plan? Just plan on doing the best you can. My son oldest is 2 1/2- I had an epidural, it did not alter him mentally or physically, he can say his alphabet and count to 10 at 30 months- and I did not breast feed. But I do LOVE him and spend time with him and play with him and talk to him.
Don't over think it- you'll be great.

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S.S.

answers from Miami on

The risk of toxins to your baby is great when given pitocin, epidural and other meds. You have to think about how toxic our children are today with vaccines, food, environment and the age of the mother at time of birth. The older the mom, the more toxic she is. So that's what I think ppl are referring to when they ask. Toxic children will have huge allergies, ADHD, Autism, auto immune disorders, and Asthma. SO reduce your load by eating organic, staying away from sprays, cleansers, paints, the dentist and use all natural products. C-sections are never good because the baby does not use their own reflexes to crawl and smoosh down the birth canal. LAter on this will influence their development because the reflexes were never kicked on to begin with. Whatever happens tough, make sure your baby gets ample tummy time from birth. Four times a day at least for 30 minute increments. This will ensure a strong core and no flat head, Torticollis and other delays. Good luck and maybe say to nosy ppl, "Well, we will just have to wait and see what happens, won't we?"

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N.G.

answers from Miami on

Of course it's still natural. You will come across those fanatics who believe that its best for the baby for you to not take any meds, but I think thats just insane. You the mommy is the one that has to get through that ordeal and still raise this child forever. Never forget a happy mother equals a happy child. We know longer live in the stone ages where we had no choices.

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K.K.

answers from Austin on

Why do you want to give your baby drugs before it is even born? That is what you will be doing even if you get an epidural, some of that medication will go to the baby. I had my first baby with an epidural and the next two were born at home with no drugs. The babies born without any drugs are so much more alert at birth. My 2 that were born without drugs could even hold their head up at birth. I had my 3rd three weeks ago and not only is she holding her head up really well but she can push herself up on her arms.
Women have been having babies for thousands of years without medication and you can do it too. Trust me, there are a lot more painful things in life than childbirth.

Lisa

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J.S.

answers from Miami on

The drugs are not healthy for the mom or the baby, so if you can get through it naturally that's the ideal - the smoother the delivery the less stress there is for the child entering this world - which can affect the physical and psychological health of your child. Pain meds can have lasting negative impacts on a baby - so if you can find other ways to reduce pain then there's less risk - hypnobirthing, lamaze, and other resources can help you prepare to have a more natural birth.

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T.B.

answers from Miami on

I have 3 children and all 3 were c-sections. C-sections are on the rise and more and more doctors are indeed doing more c-sections. For me personally, I wish I had experienced a natural childbirth, meaning a vaginal delivery. For some women like myself, I feel like I missed out on something. I wouldn't be offended when people ask. Maybe they are asking because they were unable to delivery naturally. Maybe they are asking in hopes to share their personal story. What woman doesn't enjoy talking about her birth story? It's a moment that we will always remember.

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M.P.

answers from Provo on

I loved my epidural. Plain and simple. I was in true labor for 4 days so by the time I was accepted into the hospital I was done and ready to be "drugged up". The two downsides of it were that if it moved you almost instantly felt every single contraction. I'm sure I could even feel my toe nails growing. But once they got it put back in I was fine and dandy. My friends that came and visited me (who haven't had babies yet) were going, "we'll if labor looks that good, I want to be pregnant." They couldn't believe how relaxed and chatty I was. About 2 hours before I had to start pushing, I got sleepy, but I'm guessing it's because I got no sleep for 2 days. The night before I woke up every 8-10 minutes because of the contractions were so bad. I had to scream into my pillow to make sure I didn't wake up the rest of the house.
The second thing is you can still feel where they put the needle, even now and it's been 6 months. The first week it's super sore, but so is everything else so what is one more thing?
Next baby I have I'm going to try and do a natural, but I wont I'll gladly accept an epidural if it get's to bad. If you do decide to go natural prep yourself. I thought I'd be fine being a theatre major and knowing every single breathing exercise and technique out there. Oh no. I want to try hypnobirthing. I hear it's really a great way to mentally block out the pain, but yet still enjoy the birth. Anywho, it's your decision, not anyone elses and your the one pushing the bowling ball out your va-jay-jay. That's how I see it.

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J.W.

answers from Seattle on

Do whatever you feel is best! I have friends who have had all natural no pain meds, And I have friends, and myself included, that had it "natural" with pain meds. If this is your 1st, which I' guessing it is, IT WILL HURT! BADLY! lol. with my 1st, I planned on having an epidural the entire pregnancy, then whem my labor came on everything was going so fast and it was easy and wasn't hurting... until about 15 hours into labor... Then I was crying and curled in a ball and got the Ep. So, After that, there was no question in my mind whether I was going to get it or not with my other 2 kids.
At the end of the day, It is YOUR body and Your baby... You need to do what you feel is right for you. You should try to choose a path though before you go into labor. Sometimes women say, "we'll see how it goes" and by the time they want the epidural it is too late to get one.

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R.A.

answers from Boca Raton on

It's not that natural childbirth makes you more of a woman, it's just that natural childbirth allows you to be in control. You have the chance to drink something if you want, to move around if you want, and very important is that you are able to allow your child to come out correctly. Most often, in hospitals they have you lie down and that's just not how nature intended it. It can be in YOUR environment, your home, birthing center, whatever. You can have whomever you want there too. There are many who have un assisted births too. There are more complications when the medical profession becomes involved. Midwives were the only ones to assist in births for thousands of years. It was only when the medical profession saw another money making opportunity that they became involved and pushed midwifery aside. Midwifery has been around since the beginning of time and something that all should look into just to learn about it.

And NO I did not circumcise and I breastfed (for 4 years!), I have NO idea where that woman got the idea that most women who deliver naturally mutilate their child and give them artificial breast milk. That is an idiotic statement.

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L.M.

answers from Boca Raton on

That's crazy natural is natural if it's coming out that way, I wouldn't do it without an epidural. I am also 33wks and I get the same question, but I think some people that ask that don't mean the same thing. Just make a joke about it and say what with or without make-up. I could careless what others think I had my first son with an epidural and I wouldn't have done it any other way because I felt it wear off at one point before I started pushing and that is nothing I ever want to feel again. It's great for the woman that can do it, but I am not one of them. I see no reason to experience that kind of pain, I might not have that luxury of natural this time, so far it sounds like I have to have a c-section I have marginal placenta previa :( Well I wish u the best, enjoy the pregnancy and get an epidural so u can enjoy your new arrival!! LisaM

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W.K.

answers from Washington DC on

i had an unmedicated birth. i think it's funny what you wrote because i had the opposite experience that people kept telling me horror birth stories so that i'll get the epidural. one friend even called the day before i went into labor and strenuously insisted i was insane for even considering no drugs. to each his own, i say. just be informed about the options and complications.

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H.S.

answers from Columbia on

I've tried reading through some of the responses but unfortunately I am at work and don't have enough time. :-) I just want you to do what is best for you and what you want to do. I am reading a lot of responses about the epidural and other drugs having a negative affect on the baby & I don't believe that at all. I unfortunately had to have a c-section so I can't say anything about the pain during natural childbirth but I know that for my next ones I'm pretty positive that I will go with an epidural and/or any other drug I feel necessary. I have quite a few friends (& 3 siblings all of which who had babies last year along with me) who delivered vaginally AND got the epidural and their babies came out just fine. Perfect & thriving ... and those who decided to nurse ... their babies didn't have any trouble latching because they had an epidural. I personally feel that you should just go with your gut. If you want an epidural ... get one! Don't let anyone tell you otherwise. Also, although I had a c-section, afterwards I was offered Vicodin and even though I was nursing I took it and my now almost 9-month-old son suffered no ill effects and is perfectly healthy and happy. Good luck!!

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W.T.

answers from Jacksonville on

I don't get it either! Do what you think is best because it's your body and your delivery. Whatever makes you relaxed and comfortable during your labor is what's best for baby. Good luck!

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K.W.

answers from Miami on

Girl these people you are talking about annoy me to bits!
The bottom line is that it is YOUR choice how you would like to have your baby because in the end YOU are the one who has to birth the child however it comes into this world. There is nothing "wrong" with natural vs elective cesarian (if that's your choice). If the surrounding circumstances are right for your choice then go for it! In the end sometimes it's not up to us...maybe you choose to have a cesarean and your water breaks before your scheduled date and by the time you get to the hospital you're 9cm Dialated and have no option but to go the opposite route that was planned.
I support whatever decision you make and wish and pray everything goes well for you in the end.

Here's to a heathy delivery and a happy and healthy baby! That's what it's about right?

Best of EVERYTHING to you!:)

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C.K.

answers from Los Angeles on

Its an individual decision. I went natural both times because that what I wanted to do. Do what your comfortable with and make sure your doctor goes along with you.

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S.R.

answers from Tampa on

I've read many of the responses and I have to tell you - the ones who say you are powerless after you have an epidural are going overboard. I did not plan on having an epidural, and I won't go into my story here, but when I did, I was still able to move my legs and shift up in bed. I was able to think a little clearer also, as I was finally able to get on top of my breathing (I could hardly breath through labor - it was scaring me). And even though I could get up and move around during labor before the epidural, I have to say, I really didn't want too! If you have terrible cramps coming every few minutes, do you really want to walk a marathon? And the only position that was comfortable for me - sitting on the side of the bed felt great - made the baby's heart rate go way down! There was no other position that worked for me except that one - and trust me, I tried several. I was also determined to go without meds even though I had to be induced, but I changed my mind. And my baby was very alert when born (I also had an "emergency" c-section - but that is a different story). She was not the least groggy and was ready to nurse as soon as I was able (within an hour of birth). So please do not worry too much about it. And this is just the beginning - next people will ask, "breast-feeding or formula?" and "co-sleeping or crib?" and "spanking or not spanking?" Good grief! None of your business! Find a nice way to say that :-). Best of luck!

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P.A.

answers from Denver on

Having a child without the benefits of a drug doesn't make you more of a woman. It just makes the whole experience more painful ! Have an epidural, enjoy the experience. Better for you and the baby. Less stress on both of you . Good luck !

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L.A.

answers from Orlando on

I didn't get it either. Do what you want - it's going to be an incredible experience either way!!

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B.S.

answers from Fort Myers on

i see you have gotten alot of responces. as you can tell, each of us mothers has an oppinion on this. well i am going to give my story too. :-)
withmy son i was induced on his due date. I held off on all meds until i hit 6 cm. thats when all hell broke loose and i got the epidural. WOW what a difference. i feel that with modern medicine, women should NOT have to go through labor withOUT the epidural.
with my daughter i was induced with the cervadil. once they pulled the cervidal about 1 hr later my water broke. i immediatly got into the bath tub. in the bath i got totally grossed out with the fact that i was sitting in my own fluid and blood so i got out of the tub. i immediatly asked for the epidural since i have done this before and knew i didnt want to go through that pain again. unfortuantly my labor was progressing rather fast and i didnt have time for the epidural so i had to go "natural" with NO drugs.
SCREW THAT! It was a horrible experience. With my son i remember the whole delivery... with my daughter i dont. i just remember screaming and cussing and my head turing like the exorcist. LITTERLY!
so thats my story... and my advice would be to GET THE EPIDURAL!

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D.M.

answers from Denver on

I like your attitude. Focus on what is best for you and the baby. I wanted to have "natural child birth" and because it was necessary as my babie's heart rate was dangerously low after one push - had a c-section. Three years and two babies later, I can honestly say IT DOES NOT MATTER as long as the baby and mom are healthy and cared for. What does matter is the mother you are after the birth. Keep up your realistic logical attitude and enjoy the rest of your pregnancy.

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L.H.

answers from Miami on

all i can say is- just be open to anything. what you plan to happen most likely won't. all that matters is that your baby comes out healthy (and you stay healthy during labor). it doesnt matter how- with or without drugs, vaginally, c-section, whatever.
i had a plan and was intent on going without drugs, but labor was too long and the baby needed to get out. all that matters is that she got out safely.

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T.A.

answers from Tampa on

hi S.! i am a mom to a three year old son. before he was born, i used to watch alot of the health channel/ and child birth shows too. i found that a "natural" child birth is when you dont ask for/ or get anything at all for pain, (not epidural or anything/ and the baby isnt born by c-section. i personally HAD to have an emergency c-section, due to complications at 36 weeks. so, i really didnt have a choice. i DID ask for pain killers/ had an epidual, and everything when fine. i guess most people are against pain killers cause its probably not to good for the baby; but no one ever told me how its bad for them or anything. everything was fine with my baby too. i would personally, (now thinking back,) should of done some research on that. ask your ob doc + might want to do research .that way you can make an educated dicision on what you want to do,(that is if you wont need a c-section.) good luck on the birth!

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J.A.

answers from Jacksonville on

I don't know what others have said or will say, but here is my two cents:

I have given birth to four children. The first was induced (because I was in labor but not dialating) and with pain medication and still very rough because I was toxic and in hard labor for 36 hours. The second child came just 15 minutes after my first round of pain medication! Labor was only a few hours and I probably could have held out. The third child came after only 30 minutes at the hospital, no time to get pain meds and she wasn't too dificult. The fourth child was another difficult, long delivery with induction and pain meds again.

All four children came into this world just fine and were all healthy. With two of them I yelled and cussed like a sailor during delivery and they are no different than the two I didn't yell with.

You do whatever you feel right with, and don't let anyone dictate to you anything different, or make you feel bad for your choices. BTW my kids are 27, 26, 24 and 6! If there were going to be ill effects from pain medications or yelling in the delivery room, they would have shown up by now!

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E.

answers from Miami on

I got that question a lot when I was pregnant too. Honestly, I always planned on giving it a try but would NOT give up the option for pain meds. My typical reply to the ones suggesting it was not needed was; "Would you try to get a tooth pulled without any medication?" It can be done - you won't die from the pain, right?"

I will admit however, I did NOT get any pain relief for either of my two deliveries - not because I did not want it - cause boy, did I - I just delivered too fast. After the first my husband said, "now you know you can do it without pain meds"...my reply was "no, now I know how much I don't want to do it WITHOUTH them!"...Unfortunately the 2nd came even faster than the 1st - 30 minutes after arriving to the hospital...oh well.

In the end whatever your decision, if you even get to decide, will be the right one for you. Best of luck.

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