When to Take Them Out of the High Chair?

Updated on April 01, 2008
A.D. asks from Stephenville, TX
17 answers

My two year old sons are getting pretty bad about wanting out of their high chair in the middle of the meal. I have read that you shouldnt try to force them to eat more than they are ready to so when they ssay "please down" i let them down. I am beginning to wonder if this is the right course of action. Should I be doing the sit at the table til your done routine? what are your veiws on this?

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So What Happened?

Thank you all for your advice! The boys are definately snakers. I will try the booster chairs and see how that goes. I will also try to make dinner the meal that they have to sit all the way through. I know I just need to grin and bear it until they know the rules. Thanks again.

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S.S.

answers from Wichita Falls on

We all sit for 10 minutes (from one to seventeen, and we use a timer - everyone has to talk about their day, and everyone has to listen), then anyone who is done may be excused. Please down? Awesome!

S.

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M.B.

answers from Dallas on

Sounds like you got a lot of good advice--I would try starting the booster. All three of mine started it at about 14 months. I would also not put them to the table until you sit down--so they are not finished when you finally get there. And, remember to give them less--toddlers start to eat less food, because they are not growing as fast as they used to be.
good luck

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M.H.

answers from Dallas on

What we've been doing is telling ours that he has to wait til we're all done til he can get down. If you were at a restaurant trying to eat you wouldn't be able to take them down and let them run around so they need to learn that they stay put til the meal is over, you know? You don't have to force them to eat, just explain to them that its not time to get down yet and yes, they can get down when everyone is ready. This way you don't have to rush or interrupt your own meal because they are finished first. With two, you need all the help you can give yourself!

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M.W.

answers from Houston on

A dietician showed me this. If a person cups their hands together, that is about the size of their stomach. A childs is definately smaller than an adults, so if they are eating at least close to that, not loosing weight and still very active- Don't worry, when they get to be teenagers they will become bottomless eating machines! If they are mischievious when they leave the table, maybe encourage them to sit near by to play. (I don't know how your house is layed out)If they are returning to nibble to finish, then you have an active child (or 2) Some children can concentrate on a project- eating, coloring etc. sitting very still. Others need to be moving constantly. I have a friend that Home schools her 3 (2g/1b) Her middle daughter sits on a bouncy ball as she does her work and now is passing her subjects. Extra energy that needed to be burned.
And don't let them break the habit of asking to be excused from the table.
If they are not eating enough, do they snack through the day?
Another thought- The attention spand of toddlers is alot shorter than ours. So forcing them to sit still, may be asking them to entertain themselves..that might lead to food fights. The older they get the longer you can "train" them to sit with the family, if they are finished eating, open a conversation about their day.
They do grow up,
M.

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C.R.

answers from Houston on

A.,

I'm hoping some of the advice is paying off for you. My son went to the booster seat at about 15mo. He's seven now and a good eater, but there are times he still ask to leave the table before clearing his plate, yet in the same breath will ask for dessert. My husband and I had to compromise on what action to take...I truly believe that part of society's weight problem is the fact that our generation was taught to clear our plates before getting up and my husband was taught you eat what your served regardless. That was okay when portions where of normal size, not extra-large. So we cut back the portion size for awhile, until he began to ask for seconds and we stopped giving him more than one cup of a drink. By stopping him from filling up on liquids right out of the gate, he began to save it for the meal.

The rule we still live by is that in order to have dessert/late snack his dinner must've been finished...we remind him if he's hungry enough for the dessert, he's hungry enough to finish the main dish. I will have to admit when my son was 2-4 he and I would bet he couldn't finish, then he'd want to prove he could to me. Yes, there was a prize...tons of hugs & kisses.

P.S.
The only way he can leave the table before everyone else is if he decides it is bedtime. Hope all helps!

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P.A.

answers from Houston on

I think everyone has given great advice. I have very active almost 3yo and it's still hard to keep her at the table even in a booster that straps her down. I tell her that meal time is spent at the table and even if she's done eating that I want her to sit with the family and keep us company then focus the conversation on what she has to say. Also to incourage her to eat well, I serve food on dishes with her favorite characters so that she can uncover the pic as she eats. When she's only eaten 2-3 bites and says she's done cause she sees the pic I mix up her food and tell her to try again. She's a snacker so at dinner time I start her with ~ 3Tablespoons of food and if she wants more she can have it. When she finishes her plate she has a sence of accomplishment and it makes everyone happy.

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L.F.

answers from Austin on

At 2, you might be think about letting them sit in a booster at the table. And when they're done, there's no returning. Teach them it's not a buffet.

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G.W.

answers from Auburn on

Hi A.,

I have two and a half year old twin boys, too and they have been done with the high chairs for many months now. I bought them one of those one piece collapsable Little Tykes picnic tables where they normally sit for breakfast and lunch. For dinner, they will sit at the big table with the rest of us but usually up on their knees (we tried the booster seats but our table is designed so that they can't fit their legs under the table so that didn't work). And I don't make my boys eat any more if they say they are done. If they haven't eaten enough then they don't get any yummy stuff so they are learning that lesson. I've learned with my daughter who is nine that food is one thing I will not fight about. Children eat when they are hungry and don't why they aren't.

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E.D.

answers from Dallas on

I agree with the boosters if they are the kind that can be strapped on and strap the boys in.
I say this because I picture you all chasing them around and not being able to finish your own meal.
At 2, mine was still in a seat, and he sat with us until we were done. Otherwise, we'd have never eaten... hmmmmmm that could be the new diet plan. LOL
sorry.
Oh, and even if you don't let them down, applaud them for their manners. Please is great for their age. YAY on that.
Good luck!

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T.S.

answers from Longview on

I will add that while we should not force them to eat a full meal, we should force them to eat healthly.
I had one that would eat the bread and drink the milk and be done.

So I improvised new rules. You could have the bread/roll and more milk after you ate 2 bites of veggie and meat. That ended some of the jumping up halfway through a meal. ;-)

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S.T.

answers from San Antonio on

Both of my kids were out of their high chair at 19 months. Life was much smoother after that. Phone books make an excellent booster seat.

They would sit for a bit longer at the table after they were done.

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B.

answers from Houston on

Maybe it's time to get them to booster chairs now. Both of my girls moved out of the highchair before they were two. Sometimes my youngest daughter (she's 20 mos.) wants out of the booster to get down but we have a rule that she has to stay at the table with us until we are done or almost done. She doesn't have to eat but we want her to stay and talk with us so we just engage her in conversation. We really want to keep dinner as a family time. I hope it gets better soon!

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D.N.

answers from Houston on

I also have twin two year olds (girl and boy)but they stay in the high chair for the meals. Once they are out, they are out and the meal is over. We have a rule they must be sitting down to eat, high chair for meals, anywhere they are sat for snacks (their table, sofa, etc). Does the meal end when they are out? Maybe they have had enough if that's the case. I think when they want down, they should get down and experience the consequence of that - ie, that the meal and eating are over until the next time. I really don't think they will starve themselves, but they will leanr that they need to be sat in the high chairs to eat.
Goos luck!
D.

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A.B.

answers from Dallas on

We only force the high chair or seat when we are outside of our own home. My husband and I try to eat rather quickly and we have a deal with our son that he has to sit at the table until mommy or daddy is done even if he is finished eating. Once again this is only when we go out or visit someone else. At home he has his own table that i set for him and he can eat as he wants. All in all though, if its causing more trouble to keep him in the seat we just put him down.

A.G.

answers from Houston on

sounds like you have a couple snackers, kids are great like that. Their high metabolism keeps them on the go, i'd reccomend booster chairs and for their three meals a day to be chopped up into 6 snacks. sometimes the body knows what it needs.

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J.C.

answers from Dallas on

Yes! Sit at the table til you are done is a must! Otherwise they'd be grazing. If they say "please down", let them down, but with no more food. They will learn for sure! It just takes time. My 2 1/2 yr old is finally learing it! And now he snacks less and eats more healthy food!

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K.K.

answers from Dallas on

Setting the timer has worked for us when one of our children says she is done before the rest are...we do not force her to keep eating, but do tell her to sit until the timer goes off and then she can get down. That worked pretty good.

We also have a picnic table that our two eat at...they are just turned 3 and almost 2 and have been at the picnic table about 8 months or so. Works great.

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