Wondering About Time Limits for game/TV, Etc

My son is 6 and starting first grade. He does not use any electronics. We don't own any video games and he does not watch tv (with the rare exception of the combination of a rainy day on which he happens to be sick - then we might watch a movie). I have no idea when kids have time to watch tv or play video games. DS gets home from school at 4 or from his after school arts program at 6. He plays outside until dinner, we eat dinner, read stories and by then it is 8 pm - time for bed.

They don't get to play it until ALL homework is completed 100% and they do their chores, and they are behaved.

We are a tech family and have a lot of tech things in the house, which is not only for, the kids.
But my kids don't have self-regulation problems, about being plugged in. They do play video games etc. but they also just don't wanna play it too, most of the time. And they are just outside playing or doing other things.
We don't use tech gadgets to keep the kids busy. My kids are busy whether or not there are tech gadgets around.

All you do, is set a limit and make a schedule if you have to.
Then tell your kids.
And that's it.
And if the kids grumble, too bad.
You tell your elder obstinate child... "No, I am the adult, I make the rules. If you want privileges, you earn it."

My sister inlaw really had a problem with her boys and the video games.. They had a pool house and all of their gaming systems were in there..

It got so bad the boys would never use the pool even when their friends were over.

She finally came up with the rule.. "For as long as you read.. Is how long you can play video games." So if they read for an hour.. they could play the video games for an hour. .. But they could swim, or play without having to read first.

They kept this up till they were in high school, then they had so much going on.. She allowed more video game time, so they would come home!

We don't have time during the week to play any electronics...with school, chores, Girl Scouts and soccer we are full.

After school is for homework...
Before school is for chores...
Girl Scouts, Soccer take up three to four nights a week.

By the time we get home it's eat, bath and bed.
Are they doing any other activities? I would just tell them here are the times your allowed to play if chores, homework, other responsibilities are done...if these are not done then you're out o' luck.

You're the Mom. You're the Boss.

No mouth, no back talk. It's that simple.

He talks back, he sets a bad example for his brothers.
He talks back, he's being disrespectful.

Have a Family Mtg & announce the new rules/policies. Hang a poster with the rules on his bedroom door. & make sure there's a punishment attached to the mouthing off!

Alternatively, you could also simply set a rule of 30 minutes each night. & again, end of subject. No back talk, no complaining.

Good Luck! Nip this in the bud before you have anarchy!

I knew I could never enforce video game time limits. It was just a battle I didn't want with four young kids 6, 4, 3 and 1, so we don't have any video games and never will. So they can't whine about it, since we don't have it. My first grader even made a video game out of paper and pretends to play it. Maybe that's funny or sad, lol. During summer they did a lot of camps (and I won't lie, it was not cheap). But when they are not in front of a video game, they have to do something. So they stayed busy.

As for TV, I allow 2 hours a day. We do 1.5 hours during the day (3/4 in Spanish and 1/4 in English), and the last half-hour before bed English.

Husband thinks 30 minutes a day tops, but he's not home with 4 little kids. Note the baby does not watch. He does hear background TV which I know is not good. But it is what it is.

Well, We don't have any TV service (except for netflix, which the kids only watch once or twice a week), and for video games/computer games they ALWAYS must be earned- EVEN in the summer time with no school. I have a reward system whenever I think that they have deserved a "point" (a voluntary chore, being especially kind to a sister, helping me out, just a good attitude about something, self-improvement on personal issues, etc), I give them one. A point can be taken away if someone is rude or naughty. Right now, I have at 5 points, they earn 30 min. of a video game (and that is the most they end up ever playing in a day- I'll be honest, they certainly don't play everyday, they are frequently NOT reaching 5 points). There are also other rewards such as a "treasure box" that can be accessed through earning 9 points. Points start fresh every day, you start at zero.

Video games are a reward. But, my oldest is on restriction from video games for another 3 weeks due to letting the game get the best of her and having a fit over the fact that she wasn't doing as well as she wanted. I told her that it is supposed to be fun, and that games should not be something that cause anger. We are working on her coping skills and I'm helping her put into perspective what is REALLY important.

We use Netflix for times M. HAS to shower and it helps them sorta stay put while that occurs (but I mostly shower when they are sound-asleep) and we also use it for our almost weekly family movie night.

During the school year, video game and TV usage is even less, just cause it ends up being that way. There is scouts, homework, ballet or gymnastics, and then there's dinner and a shower- there is hardly ANY time for video games or TV during the school week! The kids are fine with it- they actually value reading a book, going outside, coloring, or playing a board game over electronic stuff for the most part (they DO enjoy the video game reward, though!).

OH, their ages are 4, 5, 7 and 9. Kindergarten, 2nd grade and 4th grade... the youngest will be at home with me.

How about no electronic games, other than weekends? Give them an hour for each day on the weekends, if it works for you, and give your eldest a chance to help out and earn extra time. My sister sometimes does tickets 5 minutes a ticket--as an acknowledgement of help her boys give her or a cheerful attitude, etc. (the extra jobs are not the boy's chores, but 'extra' helping, and the good attitude ones are given spontaneously-- NOT as a reward for good behavior.)

For what it's worth, it sounds like lot of families deal with this same dynamic around video games. You are not alone....

My daughter (13) started sports and she's in extracuricular activities so she barely has time for that! But out our house, there's no video games during the week except on Friday's,Saturdays,and Sundays. Sure she can watch T.V. hang out on Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, Voxer, etc. but there's no video games. She has her own Ipad but I make sure she's not on to long. We Own a Xbobx 360 Live and a Kinect, a Wii, A Playstation 3 and the only exception is on Thursday which is our Family Game Night both my husband and I get off early so we just spend time with her and play board and video games and snack all evening. :)

I have two kinders (twins), one 2.5 year old, and one toddler. Each of our 3 older children gets to pick on half a hour show a day. That is 1.5 hours of screen time divided into times that are transition times for us - after getting ready for school, after getting home from school, and in the evening after dinner and (theoretically) after homework. My two older children also have hand held videogames. I bough the book binding rings from the office supply store and they each get 7 rings per week. They can use their rings anytime and each ring buys them 15 minutes. They can also play for "free" during the TV time or when we are at a DR's office. Basically we are trying to control total screen time and keep it under 2 hours a day. If all 2 hours are spent on the video game and none on the TV we are fine with that. We will probably bump it up to 30 minutes in 1st or 2nd grade depending on the homework load. We follow the same rules whether it is a school day or not as we feel they should be using the extra time on the weekends to play with their family, other toys and to play outside. On a side note, we also specifically try to choose games that are easy to stop playing and have frequent save points so that the child doesn't have to feel like they are loosing out when they turn the game off.

I've tried time limits periodically... they'll work for a short period of time, and then they just. get. in. the. way. / become problematic.

What's consistantly worked well, however, is this simple rule:

Pop off with good attitude whenever asked (with enough time to save) WITH good attitude, and ask before popping on / be okay with a 'nope' answer.

If that rule is broken (surly attitude, going on without asking, "bored" w/out and doesn't want to do anything BUT electronics) the following is invoked:

1st = all of that day and all of the next is electronic free
2nd (aka continues to be icky, either after the 36 hour ban or the next day allowed) = all of that week
3rd = 2 weeks
4th = 1 month

We've had a month ban twice (in 7 years... he's 10 now), theoretically the next step is 2 months. Typically he gets a 36hr ban 3 or 4 times a year. a week ban... the last was about 18mo ago.

I've periodically tried time limits, even though I've used this system since he was 3, thinking the time limits might make things 'easier'... and they just never have.

We don't have any. I choose to not fight about this. We do have activities and other stuff that limits the time they spend on things though.

Most evenings we have gymnastics or dance, BMX, or some other thing like that. If they want to play games or be on the computer they can be. When we get home from our activities and their homework is finished and dinner is over they can play all they want until it's time to get ready for bed.

My boys would play video games all day every day if they could! Anyway, during the school year we are pretty busy. I make them play outside for an hour everyday after school, except on Wednesdays I allow them to play video games for an hour after school. After supper they have swimming, martial arts and choir practice during the week, so they wouldn't have time anyway. I let them play video games Friday nights after supper, unless we have other plans. We normally do some kind of an outing on Saturday. Saturday night is movie night. Sunday we go to church, and usually an outing in the afternoon. Sunday night they often watch some tv (Americas Funniest Videos and The Walking Dead). They are seven and ten. The key is to make sure they have something else to do.
The boys both have a ds, and the ten year old has an ipod touch as well. They are allowed to play though when we are waiting, like at a doctors appointment, or in the car if we are running around doing a lot of errands, or when I have to bring them along to a committee meeting or something.

During the school year there are not video games during the week. Only sat mornings and sunday afternoons. She can watch tv for about a half hour or so after school to chill out and relax after her long day. Usually accompanied by a snack. Then its homework, walk/ bike ride around the block and bed. One or two evenings a week she has a special ususally. Dance or gymnastics. I usually let her put a movie in for bed helps her fall asleep. I really do not like night lights on all night so I can set the tv to turn off in an hour.

Hi B.,

We do have time limits for our 2 kids on TV, WII or any other PC game, It is not just during school hours (we home school), but during the summer as well. They are not allowed to play in the mornings ever either summer or school days. They play about 1 hour and half WII during weekends in the afternoon if we don't have plans to go out or any other activity.
Electronics games ARE addictive, and for that reason we are not buying any other of a kind. My oldest wants an X-Box, it is not going to happen, not even the DS or alike. My kids, themselves, prepare a list of things they like to do during their spare time, and we have a "games/fun things to do jar" with written games, activities, etc that they choose to do to enjoy their spare time. I think the goal H. is having the kids BUSY...When they have every single electronic game handy they won't do anything else, and believe me they do find something else when they don't have another alternative. Please let me share with you something I found out a few days ago, some friends of my older kid told me that they really enjoyed playing with my son since he was very creative and they were never bored with him (he reads, he creates new games, etc...), and I think that is because of the need to find how to amuse himself besides electronics....Just a thought. It was so nice to hear that! I am not saying this like bragging about, it is just that it feels so good!

During the school year, video games aren't much of an issue. We are just really too busy for game time. Unless it's a bad weather day, it usually not even brought up. This summer I noticed that I was getting a little lax too and letting him play a bit too much. So we started a system where it has to be earned. For every book my six year old read aloud he earned a poker chip. Every journal entry earned him one too. A journal entry was any writing on the front and back of the paper...he wrote some about his summer, but mostly made up stories. Each chip was worth 15 minutes of game time. He could cash them at MY discretion. It was a great way to positively motivate him to practice his reading and writing and it helped make me pay closer attention to how much time he spent playing games.

For this school year I am going to start something new. I will not be allowing any TV before school. Most days my kids will wake early and watch TV until I tell them to start getting ready...not this year. No AM TV. They will not be allowed to watch TV upon arriving home either. I will only allow 30 minutes of TV watching after all homework, chores, dinner and showers are complete. Maybe right before bed, as a "calm down" time.

Weekends are another story. They will be allowed to watch TV when they wake up and until I get tired of it being on and tell them to shut it off. Most likely by about 11:00 am. Then after church on Sunday they can watch and before bed on Sunday night they can watch AFV with me (family tradition). That's it.

Personally I can't stand TV. We have a nice one in our livingroom that is going bad and when it dies, I don't plan on replacing it. :)