Do You Make Your 2 Year Old Sit at the Dinner Table for His Entire Meal?

My kids have always been made to sit at the table. No wandering around or playing with food. Meal time is meal time. If he'd rather be playing, maybe he's not hungry? Maybe cut out a snack?

That's just my house though. Not the only way to do it!

Well I don't have little ones anymore, but I know people who let their son wander around, and it drives me crazy. When he is eating at my house, he is not allowed to wander around. That is just plain rude, and if the child should be made to sit at the table, it will just help him with learning to wait, to do what he wants after the meal is finished.

I never allowed toys at the table. Reason: Meal time is meal time and family communication time, not playtime.

Even at the tender age of 2, all of my children were expected to eat at the table with us and weren't allowed down until they were finished and washed up. Reason: Two year olds can be messy eaters and I don't want that mess all over toys and all around my house.

I take longer to eat than my kids, so I don't expect them to wait for me to finish before they are excused. When they are done my husband and I like to sit and chat for a few minutes anyway.

We have always made our kids sit still for meals. Did it mean that we ate really fast sometimes, sure but it helped over the years to make them understand that we all sat as a family to eat. No running around, no getting up at restaurants (take toys, books, etc for them) no TV.

Not only is walking around while eating dangerous (higher choking hazard), and unsanitary, but it is also a really bad habit to start. It is completely reasonable to expect a child of any age to sit while eating his entire meal. Unfortunately, since you have a set a precedent, you will have trouble expecting him to do that now. I have never allowed food to be eaten except at the table, and no toys are allowed either.

Keep in mind, children know what they are taught. If we keep our expections low, they will meet them :( Toddlers just don't eat much, but they will eat when they are hungry, and he will learn quickly (if you are consistent from this point forward), that if he's hungry, he'll have to sit at the table...

One more thing. Sometimes things don't seem that important, for example, you didn't think it's a big deal for him to walk around with food, as long as he was eating...but, often times, the reason to teach is so that our child knows how to react in the world. Would you let your son walk around eating at someone else house? I personally wouldn't like it if someone let their child walk around my house dropping crumbs and putting their messy fingers on things. for this reason, it is important to teach kids things at home so they are not confused when the the rules "change" in the rest of the world.

We sit at the table to eat. We do not wonder around. When the kids are done, they ask permission to get up and leave which is fine. I'm generally the last one because I eat slow. We have had this rule since they were little bitty. We also have the once you are excused, you are excused rule. When they were little they would eat a couple of bites and say "I'm done" and leave to go play. About a half an hour later they would scream "I'm starving". Well, too bad. Dinner time is dinner time. They learned fast!

I absolutely did with both of my boys. The reason is that we are training them for the real world. If I take my boys out to a restaurant, or to the home of a friend of family member, they are expected to have the ability to sit through the meal with the rest of us.

As far as toys at the table...no. Not even now that my boys are 9 and 10 years old. The table is for eating, not for playing. We also do not watch TV from the table. It reinforces bad eating habits. Studies show that children do not eat proper portions when distracted (nor do adults).

My DD has sat with us since she was a baby. She may not sit the entire time WE eat but she sits while she eats. Since she turned 3, we've had her ask to be excused. I think that he is old enough to sit for at least a while, no toys. He's also learning manners and social interaction and how to eat properly with utensils, etc. He won't starve. If he doesn't eat at that meal, then wait til the next snack time.

absolutely! Please teach him proper table manners! No toys & he has to sit still for his meal. That doesn't mean he won't wiggle, but he does need to respect others thru basic manners.

With my daycare, the children are never allowed to roam with food or drink. & it doesn't harm them! By 12-14 months, they transition from a high chair to a little chair at the table with the big kids. & they learn quickly! Oh, & I haven't had a child yet who wasn't "wild & crazy" or a "busy bee"....that goes with the territory!

I absolutely have my children eat at the table when it's meal time. Children learn at home what is acceptable. If your child is wondering around and eating then your child will do that at restaurants and other people's houses. Wouldn't want that!
A child that is 2.5 completely understands that they must sit at the table to eat and if they don't....no food! It's just that simple.
L.

Yes, my boys are 7 and 3 and they stay at the table while they eat. Once they get up they are done and they take their plates to the sink and wash their hands. They don't get to come back after playing for a bit. No TV, no texting and no toys at our table.

Our daughter was (and still is, she's now 4) expected to be sitting at the table as long as she was still eating. If she was done eating, she could get down, but she couldn't just walk around with food all over the place. It's unsafe, it's messy, and it's not how I expect her to behave eating anywhere. We also don't allow toys at the table - you are there to eat, and if you would rather play, then mealtime is over. I've never worried about how much DD is eating at each meal because I know if she doesn't eat much one time, she'll make up for it the next time.

my daughter sits at the table at meal time, some nights she gets down until everyone is at the table but most of the time we are all at the table and sit at the table until EVERYONE is done

Absolutely! DH and I have made DD sit at the table for the entire meal her whole life. She doesn't know any other way to eat a meal, which I'm now so thankful for - she's almost 3 yrs old. She doesn't have a toy at the table, if she chooses not to eat (which is fine) then we just try to engage her in a conversation about her day. Sometimes she has a melt-down, but we stick it out and just eat faster!

We have always have a "strick" eating habit. The table is for eating, no toys, and we stay seated until we are done. We have also added we stay seated until everyone is done but my 2 year old some times takes a while so we are more lax with that one. My 5 year old does have to ask for permission to be excused or to leave the table. Letting them wonder while eating would get food everywhere and cause way to much of a mess.

my kiddos are 2, 5, and 8 - they have always sat at the table for meals, and no toys/tv during meals. there is no reason for a kid to be running around while eating - it's not safe for one thing(choking), it creates a mess, and it just doesn't teach good habits. like you're asking, when a child is allowed to come and go from the beginning, what's the magic age they to start sitting and eating their meal? i have nephews that couldn't sit and eat a meal in a restaurant when they were 8 or 9 years old, my 2yo is fully capable of and expected to remain seated(quietly) for the duration of a meal out, or at home.

From the time my kids were little, dinner was a sit down thing. If they were clearly done eating, I took the food away. But...they were not allowed to roam the house while everyone else finished their meals. No way.
I think that the earlier you start that habit, it's just something that's natural.
For your son, it's natural to wander around and eat and play at the same time.
You will have to work to change what seems natural to him. It might be a process.

Just my opinion.

Hmm. We always had our kids sit until they were finished eating. They were in a high chair until they were able to sit at the "big" table. At that point (whatever age it was, can't remember exactly) they were accustomed to sitting in the high chair for a good 15 minutes at a shot to eat. So they sat at the "big" table until they finished their meal. It was encouragement for them to eat, not play, so that they could be excused. Worked pretty well, too. :)

As for toys at the table... not unless we were in a restaurant and they needed distraction until their food arrived. Then the toys were put away until after they had eaten.

yes and no. they have to sit while they eat, but they dont have to eat all at one setting. I put a plate out, they sit and eat a few bites, then get up, run around for a while, then come back for a few more bites. Thier little tummy is only so big and they metabolize so fast. Little kids need a steady stream of small bites. 3 square meals doesn't really work with thier tiny little bodies - per my pediatrician and all I've read. But, yes, when they are eating, they are expected to sit, chew, swallow, drink and then they can get up. I just leave the plate out a while so thay can come back for more.

I don't personally make our 2 year old sit at the table the entire time that we as a family eat dinner. I do, however, make him sit in his chair without any toys for the entire time he eats dinner. Once he is done he tells us he is done, we clean him up and he is allowed to go play. He knows he cannot interupt anyone else at the table and he goes and plays. I, personally, think that each family has to decide what works best for them and the particular child, each child is different. Our oldest would never have done this. He was allowed to have a toy as long as he sat still and was eating consistently. If you think you're 2.5 year old is mature enough to do it, why not teach them table manners early? If they are not, then do what works best for you and don't stress over it...there is still plenty of time to show them the behavior you are looking for.

I am afraid I was guilty about not making my child sit at the table. But if she got down, then there is no food. There is plenty of time to make them sit, when they are a bit older and can deal with sitting. Now she is 3, she sits much longer.

We make sure the kids sit at the table while eating. We've always done that from day one. My youngest two boys are 3 and almost 2. I think it helps get the kids to be good eaters. We all sit at the same time and eat.

Most days, YES my 3.5 yr old must sit at his table to eat. Even at age 2 he was to sit at his table/chair/highchair.

On the rare occasion he doesn't have to, it's b/c we're having apicnic at the playground and it's just easier to let him play, go take a bite, play, take another bite. I decided it's just not worth the battle to make him sit while the playground looks so tempting.

And no, he's not allowed to PLAY with toys while at the table, unless he finishes eating. ie: When we go to a restaurant, he can play with the toy while we wait, then NOT while he eats, then yes when he's done eating.

But like at Thanksgiving the other day, he had to sit and finish his meal before he could go play. At my friend's house a few months ago, her kids ate what they wanted (3 bites?) and got down to go play. My son was the last to leave the table. I think it's their age, plus being a boy, they'd rather play and get a snack later than sit and eat when it's time to.

I usually let him have a small toy, after he ate a couple of bites of his food. If all he does is play, i take the toy away from him.

I did not make my daughter sit at the table for the entire meal, and as long as the toy stayed out of the plate, it was fine fore her to ahve one at the table.

Haven't read your other answers yet - good question. Thinking back to when my 12 year old daughter was little. She ALWAYS sat in her high chair (or later at the table) when we were eating dinner. I always made sure she was hungry and ready to eat when it was dinner time. Family meal time is very important to us and we have made it a point to eat dinner together 99% of the time. I never allowed her to wander around while we were eating. I never gave her a toy at the table. She was expected to sit and eat or have conversation on her level. When she got a little older (maybe 3 or 4) we taught her that she could ask to be excused when she was done eating/talking and she still does this. It give my husband and I a few minutes of face to face time every day which is really important to me.

We're just starting to push this more with our 3.5 yr old. So I would say no, that 2.5 is too young to expect him to sit still for the entire dinner.

I'm sure you'll get lots of different answers on this. My kids are crazy active and busy bees. Asking them to sit for 10 minutes at a time is like torture.
I vote 100% yes for toys!

UPDATE: sorry - misread your question - thought you asked if age 2-3 had to sit at the table until PARENTS were done eating. Yes, my son must sit and eat his big 3 meals, but it's OK w/ me if me wanders with a cheese stick or other snack. The sitting part is "family" time - we try to have a conversation about the day and it gives us a chance to gently work on table manners.

First response:
Good lord, no. No toys at the table in our house, but when he's done (and eaten a reasonable meal), he's free to get down and look at a book on the floor while we finish. No TV/Videos - just something quiet of his choosing.

I always had his food stay on the table. And he started his meal at the table. If he wandered & came back for more....fine.

Hi Sally in my home we did the same as Shane, dinner time is family time. We also had play time in our house, and time when all toys were put away, we didn't have 24/7 play time. J.

My daughter had to sit when she ate and when she was finished she could go play. Also, with the toys - when we went out to a restaurant I ALWAYS took toys(because it took so much longer). At home, not so much.

DD has always stayed at the table for meals, as long as she could eat/sit in a high chair. I think it's easier to instill those types of expectations earlier on, before they are boundary pushing, stubborn little preschoolers. It may be easier to let them do what they want, but it's not teaching them anything, to let them do what they want during meal time.

I have had too many kids get choked on food while wandering around with food in their mouths. In child care it is a strict rule that kids are not allowed to do that either so that is where I get it. Your child needs to sit when he is eating, that is specifically chewing food and swallowing...lol. Regardless. His life is as risk, choking is a silent deadly killer. He could be simply out of sight for a moment and he could choke.

Start today and when he starts to get up while food is in his mouth distract him with a question or play a little game with him or something until his mouth is clear of all food, then he can do whatever you are comfortable with. Having a toy that is washable at the table is fine if you are comfortable with it.

As for teaching him to stay seated while others are eating...I have a strict rule that kids stay in their seat when we are out to eat. The whole time. If you go out with your child and he starts wandering around don't be surprised if the manager doesn't ask you to have your child sit down and if you don't then he may ask you to leave.

That is the only other issue I can think of, besides choking, that would matter .

Either you are eating or playing in this house, but not both. When they are finish, they clear their plate/dishes and wash their hands, then they can play quietly while the adults finish dinner.

Absolutely, he sits at the table for his meal. The ONLY exception is on the rare occasion (think road trip) where we stop at a McDonalds so we can use the restroom, get some food, and let the boys run around on the playground and get a little exercise before continuing the journey. In that case, he can eat a bite and then play a little, then come back.....but NOT in real life. At home, a restaurant, or someone else's home, he eats dinner like normal people. Both of my boys had that rule. They've never been allowed to wander around. It gets them in bad habits that are hard to break, there's the mess factor, the choking factor, the "Oh no, there's a petrefied green hot dog under my couch" factor that my bff had. I don't make him sit the whole time that WE are at the table (we may linger, have some wine, talk a bit). But the boys eat their food, talk a little bit, and when Victor (my youngest, who turns 2 tomorrow) says "ta-da!" or "I done!" then I wipe his face and hands and he can go play. Toys: the boys aren't allowed to have toys at the table unless we're at a restaurant. If at a restaurant they can have crayons or a hotwheel or action figure.

nah, I think he is young. I started sitting him for longer periods at a time as he grew up. But even today that he is 5 and sits in the table with us, I let him go play as soon as he is finished. He is expected to take his dishes to the sink and rinse his plate and cup. I don't ask him to wait until everyone is finished. But he will be expected to do so later on.

Good Luck.

Both my kids could not sit at the table very long at that age. (ok, my daughter is not quite 2.5 yet but she is not able to sit very long). We just encourage her to sit as long as possible, distract her, her brother will get her to eat more bites (she adores him) etc. We try to get her to sit there as long as possible and then when she is done we let her down. I actually will give her dinner #2 later bc she needs more calories. As she gets older we will encourage her to sit longer and longer with us. Our son is 7 now and he was the same way - crazy active with tons of energy and very little tolerance for sitting still very long. But he sits and eats with us just fine now...and has for a long time. I am not at all worried about our daughter being able to do it one day. She does have some much more mellow little 2 yr old friends who will just mellowly sit and slowly eat and take things in. Neither of our kids have that kind of personality at all! I wish! Anyway, they are able to sit longer when they get older and for now I believe in trying to keep mealtimes positive!

No, my children were not allowed to wander around during meals or have toys at the table. Bad habits are hard to break. Mealtime is mealtime, it is time to eat. If your son learns that if he won't get to eat unless he sits at the table, he'll focus on eating at mealtime. My kids were strapped into a booster when they were toddlers and spent mealtime at the table. It was not playtime.

It depends on the kid. My older daughter would definitely eat enough if she wandered, so I could be less strict about it (though I'm not). However, my one year old is easily distracted, and she won't eat much if she wants to play and isn't contained. I have to be more strict about having her sit down to eat and stay in her high chair until she's done. I will continue to do this as she gets older because otherwise she'll be so busy playing that she'll not get adequate nutrition.

Your son is getting to the age where he can learn good table manners, and that includes sitting down to eat, eating as much as he wants, and then letting you know (politely) that he is done and would like to be excused. Then he doesn't eat until the next snack/meal time. We use sign language in our house for when the kids aren't old enough to talk very well, and the sign for "all done" or "finished" is very easy.

And I'd say no to toys while eating. If he's having to sit at the table while not eating, like before food is ready or after he's done, then absolutely, but not while he's got food. Even if only for cleanliness issues. Good luck!