Taking a poll...shaved or Not? May Offend Some, but Not Meant To!!!!

Updated on February 08, 2012
D.S. asks from Grabill, IN
56 answers

Okay so...my girlfriend and I have a bet with our husbands and the only place I can think to take this poll is right here...better than door to door...lol!!! our husbands seem to think that the norm is for women to shave the "nether region" (they are speaking from their experiences pre-marriage) and that my girlfriend and I are in the minority because we don't. So do you shave or not???? If you do and are willing to share I'd be interested to know why you do and if it takes a lot of maintenance. All I can imagine is that it would itch all the time when the hair starts to grow back. Of course this is coming from someone who rarely has to shave her legs becasue my hair is so blond and fine. The thought of having to shave anything every day doesn't appeal to me at all! In all honesty my husband doesn't want me to shave it...he just likes a good argument. Hoping I can prove him wrong...lol!! I apologize if I've offended anyone. That is not my intent in any way shape or form. Thanks for reponding!!!

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So What Happened?

I am loving these answers!!! I've been sending texts to the other three updating them on the poll as we go! Just for clarification...this isn't a heated argument it's all in fun. Guess maybe we're a little twisted. LOL!!! Honestly I have to say that I have always said no way no how, but after reading some posts I'm a little intrigued. Guess it wouldn't hurt to try it at least once. So with that said maybe I should be asking...wax or shave? Tips and tricks welcome :o) For the record...I think it's great there there are men on here giving their opinion. It's good to get the perspective from both sides. The Mamapedia crew is the best!!

Featured Answers

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M.M.

answers from Detroit on

I only shave around the edges (what would show when I'm wearing underwear). I've done the whole thing before and hate how it feels, not to mention all the ingrown hairs when it's coming back in!

6 moms found this helpful

C.S.

answers from Kansas City on

Do you mean completely bare? If so, then I never do that. I'm an adult and enjoy looking like it. I do groom the area though. I don't believe I experience any itching when the hair grows in. If I do it must be so mild that I don't notice.

5 moms found this helpful

☼.S.

answers from Los Angeles on

Shaved completely once, will never do that again! (Yes, very itchy to grow back. Itched something awful!)

Anyway, neatly trimmed. Bikini line hair lasered off permanently.

4 moms found this helpful

More Answers

T.N.

answers from Albany on

Teehehe, the Mother of all TMI but...

No, I don't shave, but I do tidy up. In fact, we do it together. With his beard trimmer. We take turns. Really.

;)

13 moms found this helpful
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D..

answers from Charlotte on

To 8kidsdad: Thank you for not talking about your wife's practice as far as the actual question is concerned. Women would really prefer for the men on this site to not talk about our vaginas and breasts. That is what Leah is really trying to say. I do think that you have weirded Angela out by pointing her out in what you said. Perhaps what you said could be better understood being on a post that has nothing to do with our nether regions, perhaps about women trying to look younger in general. It is uncomfortable for most of us to have men come on this thread when we are thinking about what we look like down there. It is not "polite" conversation in normal circumstances to talk about it in front of men we are not romantically involved with. Does that make sense? I'm not trying to bawl the 2 men on this thread out, but appeal to their sense of appropriateness. (Though, again, I am thankful that 8kidsdad didn't write what his wife does. Thanks again for that.)

Original:
Sorry, but I can't get over your husbands talking about their experience pre-marriage here. Blech!

Instead of taking a poll about whether we shave or not, why not take a poll about whether your husband who likes to argue should be talking about other women's coochies he's seen before you were married. You know what MY answer would be!

Another Blech!!
Dawn

10 moms found this helpful

T.T.

answers from Dallas on

To try and put it politely...no one wants to fight the forest to get to the kingdom. Which is a HORRIBLE way of putting it...but I'm trying to be nice.

I also wanna throw out there...men like what men like. And I'm willing to work a little to keep him interested.

Interesting way to start a Monday. LOL

Sending nothing but good thoughts your way. :)

10 moms found this helpful
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D.K.

answers from Pittsburgh on

Sorry, I just don't get the prepubescent girl look.

OK, 8kidsdad - let me rephrase - why are men supposed to want to have sex with women who look like prepubescent girls? And why should a woman who has earned her hair, wrinkles, gray hair and need I say it, life and sexual experience, look to encourage that?

Women - I have no issue with hair or no hair - I personally don't like ingrown hairs but would not argue with your rationale for shaving. Just like some prefer a man with a beard and some not. But the suggestion that we do or should ASPIRE to be little girls again - OFFENSIVE.

8 moms found this helpful

D.D.

answers from New York on

I'm resentful enough at having to shave my pits and legs.

7 moms found this helpful
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A.S.

answers from Boca Raton on

Neat and clean is great, but I think it's weird how our society seems to have shifted on this issue. Why are grown women supposed to look like little girls? I don't get that.

ETA: OK, now I'm a little puzzled by 8kidsdad's response (and here I was bragging on him yesterday LOL). IMHO there is a big difference between a prepubescent girl and a 20-something hottie. Yeah, I'd like to be mistaken for the 20-something. No, I would not want to be viewed as a prepubescent girl by a grown man (that's called pedophilia).

7 moms found this helpful

P.E.

answers from Atlanta on

my wife shaves but does not clear it all off. eeewww. she keeps it trim so nothing pops out of a bathing suit or underwear.

5 moms found this helpful
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R.J.

answers from Seattle on

I prefer not to shave... I prefer to wax :)

You don't look like a little girl if you're leaving a triangle or other shape on top!

Like a previous responder I started shaving/waxing while in the military.

I hate having hair below. It pulls, itches, gets tiny bits of toilet paper stuck to it (lint), urine soaks into the shafts of the hair and the lint dust in the hair, creating an inimitable smell... and using babywipes every single time triggers yeast infections in most women.

TMI answer... but I have a very keen sense of smell. I can usually smell those who don't shave/remove hair from 5 or 6 feet away if they're walking or standing/sitting. Most women in their 50's and upward, and about 1/3 of women I've met (or just been around; work, restaurants, bus stops, movies, etc.). It's no different from smelling someone who doesn't use deodorant in any kind of enclosed space.

5 moms found this helpful

L.M.

answers from New York on

Dawn said coochie. tee-hee tee hee. Ok I'm over that now.
And Theresa as usual cracks me up.
And sorry I may be in the minority here, but I wish there were no men on this site. Sorry sorry not trying to start a bash-fest. Just saying.

OK D., I do not shave. I have gone bald eagle once. (Got a brazilian wax, in a moment of madness. Hubby liked it. But it was VERY painful!!

I have done bikini waxing to keep it neat. I have also shaved to keep it neat. Either way I seem to get a little irritated down there when it grows in.

4 moms found this helpful

R.D.

answers from Richmond on

I would imagine more women don't shave it all off... I think that's most men's wishful imagination, HAHA!!

To answer the question, I do shave 95% of it... I leave just a little something because my husband likes it.

I shave because it drives me nuts if I don't! It's really not any more high maintenance than shaving your legs, you just kind of get into routine and it's not a big deal at ALL. The more you do it, the easier it gets.

On the other hand, I'd say my closest girlfriends are about 50/50 on the shaving thing. I really don't care what YOU have in your pants, as long as you're comfortable with it, LOL!! :)

4 moms found this helpful

V.W.

answers from Jacksonville on

In the summer (swimsuit season) I take a little off around the edges, and trim anything that might be long enough to 'escape' the suit. But that's it. It is itchy when it starts to grow back in and I hate that. If it isn't swimsuit season, then forget it.

The way some women on this site have mentioned this in the past, I thought I was in the minority... but maybe it is a 'generational' thing. I'm past 40, and never have been one to shave there (all of it). But it seems that it is more common among the younger women? Whatever. My husband has never complained. :)

4 moms found this helpful

C.P.

answers from Columbia on

I keep myself trimmed, but definitely NOT shaved. It's just too friggen itchy! I also think that the...ahem!...adult "industry" has perpetuated this silly idea that all women should be shaved. Uhm, no.

I think that both members of the couple should be neatly groomed. It's just the polite thing to do. Get the trimmers out and buzz the fur down neatly. Makes things nicer for both.

4 moms found this helpful

J.M.

answers from Philadelphia on

I shave every day (legs, armpits and down yonder) It takes M. all of 2 minutes total since I do it every day. Its only a minute more than J. lathering up. Honestly I don't see how the 2 minutes of extra time is a nuisance. I do it every time I shower. So sometimes a few times a day. Its only itchy the first few days then your body gets used to it. I do it because I like the way it feels better and also for foreplay. I want it to be an inviting area and with hair I don't think it would be! I want to be prepared for "fun" all of the time. Theres nothing worse then not feeling clean enough to accept favors=(

4 moms found this helpful
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P.G.

answers from Dallas on

There was a post on here not long ago about this same thing. Personally I'm au-natural and the itch/ouch factor just doesn't make me want to go there. I figure the hair is there for a reason - protection? not sure. But after that e-mail I was inspired to "trim the hedges" a little, and even that was a bit ouchy! Hair ends up short and pokes you. Sheesh, the things we do! LOL

3 moms found this helpful
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B.B.

answers from San Antonio on

Waxed, not completely bare, but close. I could care less what my hubby thinks about it (although he does like it), but I like it. That's what matters most to me. I feel cleaner and fresher that way. I usually wax about once every 3 weeks.

3 moms found this helpful

S.M.

answers from Lansing on

I shave it all!! Of course in the begining it took some getting used to, and your skin has to get used to it as well. Honestly I don't get the ingrown haris anymore or the itchiness or bad stubble. But then again I think my area is used to it by now! There are creams that you can buy to shave with that will keep you from getting the razor burn if you are sensitive. My friend uses coochi cream....I ususally use whats in the shower at this point, but I also shave under my arms EVERYDAY......

3 moms found this helpful
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M.K.

answers from Columbus on

I just gotta say this is hilarious!!! I love that we can "say" just about anything on here!! As for me, no, I don't shave completely. Just enough that if I wear a bathing suit nothing is peaking out!!! My husband has never asked me to shave it; actually I don't think he's ever said anything one way or the other!!

I was always told it would be extremely itchy when growing back in so that's why I've never done it. But then I'm a big chicken anyways!! lol!!!

Love the question; love the responses even more!!!

Thanks for the fun discussion!!!

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S.D.

answers from Colorado Springs on

I shave the vast majority. I started doing it when I was in the military because lots o' hair + monthly cycle + no showers for weeks @ a time = DISGUSTING! Just cleaner all around (ha, no pun intended). Anyway, I just got used to it & now I feel gross if the hair gets too long. Doesn't take too long & since I've been doing it so long there is rarely an ingrown hair our anything. Have a fun debate!

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S.T.

answers from Houston on

it was me who asked this question not so long back lol. I am pretty darn fat right now, and to be honest for me to shave would entertain contortions which I cannot do at the moment, and a large amount of blood loss. I have shaved it all off a couple of times, but the itching and irritation after only a day, is too much to bear. Also I feel when your walking around that when you have no hair, it kinds of sticks together, and sticks to your underwear much more, which is of course once of the main reasons God gave us pubes - anti friction.
Lately, because I felt hairy, I bought a trimmer, it looks like a razor, but it has longer teeth, so it just trims it down to about a 1/4 inch all over, and I can do that.

2 moms found this helpful
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K.I.

answers from Muncie on

Fully furry here. TMI for most. My husband has never mentioned anything else. We like me the way I am.

2 moms found this helpful

S.L.

answers from New York on

totally shaven would make me think of a young girl-YECH
Just my opinion, to each his/her own

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S.L.

answers from Green Bay on

I do think the majority of younger women shave it completely or mostly off. I am in the process of getting most of mine removed permanently and I'm in my early 40's. I do not find that it itches as it is growing back in. If you were going to shave it would be a tedious daily process.

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J.B.

answers from Boston on

I sometimes do, to change things up a bit. Just a different look and feel, and the maintenance is no more time consuming than what I already do in the shower for legs and armpits, which I do every other day anyway. The grow out can be a little itchy but nothing unbearable and that part doesn't last long enough for it to be a big problem.

LOL @ Theresa N. we sometimes use his beard trimmer (with the Face Saver powder stick) too! Wow way TMI here!!

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M.C.

answers from Cleveland on

It cracks me up that you have over 40 responses already. You definitely have to post the results of your "survey". I keep things trimmed, but I don't completely shave. I have completely shaved in the past and it made me feel like a little girl instead of a woman.

2 moms found this helpful
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C.J.

answers from Dallas on

Seasonally - just like my legs. . .

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A.W.

answers from Toledo on

Completely bare here!! :) Hubby loves it!

2 moms found this helpful

E.D.

answers from Seattle on

I've gone through lot's o' shaving habits. There have been times where I leave *everything* au naturel and times where I am more disciplined about shaving.

I'm in a shaving phase. It's winter, I'm kind of blah-bummed out, and it feels nice to give myself some extra attention. Hair, to look at, doesn't bother me and I'm not a particularly hairy person. But the action of doing something nice for myself IS helpful.

All that to say, right now I am shaving. Legs, armpits, bits and pieces. I *like* the way my legs feel when I shave, I like the way I smell when I shave my armpits, and, come to find out (recent discovery) I like the way my lady parts are sensitized (ahem) when there isn't hair gettin' in the way. I leave a patch above my bits for aesthetic purposes.

Can't say I'll always do this, but right now it's fun and helps me to spend some time pampering my body.

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M.M.

answers from Chicago on

The key to this is those man speak of their PREMARITAL experience. Hello!
I shaved once and it was so uncomfortable I never shaved again, I have very sensitive skin, I do wax the sides and leave a small strip in the middle - that is my maintenance. My husband also mentioned something like that, I suggested he shaved himself and felt what it is like.

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J.F.

answers from Columbus on

tried shaving it all once, never again, the itch was INBEARABLE....must depend on skin type as some say they don't have problems. ....also I did feel like I looked like a girl who hadn't hit puberty...sorry... I keep it trimmed and bought myself an electric shaver since I felt guilty using my husbands - LOL

1 mom found this helpful

A.A.

answers from Las Vegas on

I completely shave it. Husband loves it:0) It's not bad I don't get the itching when it starts to grow out. I typically shave every two or three days. I started shaving it when I met my husband as he is completely shave as well.
HTH

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B.C.

answers from Los Angeles on

I like Angela S's observation and question. Makes one pause and reflect.

Angela said, "Neat and clean is great, but I think it's weird how our society seems to have shifted on this issue. Why are grown women supposed to look like little girls? I don't get that."

Little girls have no hair under their arms, and only very light or invisible hair on their legs. Little girls have no hair coming out from under their bathing suits. Some little girls have naturally curly hair that becomes straighter as they age. Lots of little girls are blonde when they are young and become brunette when they get past puberty. Little girls don't have gray hair. Little girls don't have wrinkles on their faces until they get 50 years or so older. Little girls wear halter tops on occasion and when they do they don't wear bras. Little girls usually have a nice robust hue on their faces and they loose that 20 or more years later.

To repeat Angela's question, "Why are grown women supposed to look like little girls?" Because women are usually pleased when they are carded when they are past their mid thirties. I've read several posts here and stories in other publications where women were carded because they were buying beer with their college age children beside them. They declined to show their ID's. They were so pleased to be thought "under age", they didn't buy the beer.

My wife and I took our son to get registered for college. The college student asked my son for his information and then asked him what his wife's name was, indicating his mother. My son said, "She's NOT my wife!" The student then asked, "Ok. What's your sister's name?" My son replied, "She's not my sister. She's my MOM." The student then said to my wife, "Sorry m'am. I didn't know." Boy, Talk about an UNNECESSARY apology! When we went home, I went and got a rose for my wife and thanked her for being my beautiful oldest daughter.

Why do grown women want to look like "little girls"? My 37 year old wife was NOT angry to be thought a teenager. How about you? Would you be insulted if you were carded at 40 or older?

Good luck to you and yours.

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E.L.

answers from Detroit on

I shave, I always have. I don't know why I started to begin with, but I just kept doing it and never stopped. I definitely do not look like a pre-pubescent girl! My hubby likes it, and so did the nurse who came to shave me for my c-section, only to find she didn't need to, lol. :-)

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S.W.

answers from Shreveport on

I shave and have been for over 18 yrs now. I started as something different to try and loved how it felt and kept doing it.
I don't do it every day. The itching wasn't great the first time or two but after a while I didn't even have any itching.

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H.M.

answers from Denver on

I've done the brazilian and it was awesome - but it hurt like crazy and I've been too scared to go back and do it again - lol. But I will take it all off again as we get closer to summer - spend lots of time at the pool and it's just less worrisome then always checking for a "stray hair" lol

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B.M.

answers from Allentown on

Late on the answer- but just wanted to jump in and say it would depend on your skin type I guess, whether you would have any itching. Personally I'm not a hair person (other then your head), so my hubby and I both shave. I have never had any uncomfortable or itching. I would try the waxing, but that requires growing it in for a bit (I think it should be at least 1/4-1/2"). I have waxed my hubbys chest and stomach, but for the most part he shaves it as well. I feel it just makes things cleaner? IDK- personal preference. I can't remember when I started- I guess I always have?

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A.C.

answers from Cincinnati on

I don't shave or wax. Did it once, it was really really uncomfortable growing back out - so painful! I might be willing to give it a go again if my husband ever asked me to, but when I asked him once, he asked me why I thought he would want me to change for him. Ha ha ha. I did see a man on here suggest that I, at 30, would be proud to be mistaken for a teenager. He is incorrect. I would be insulted. And if that was what my husband wanted from me, I would be hurt and offended. I don't know that that is what shaving accomplishes, but I think it is more society than women who expect us to remain young forever (thankfully, my husband certainly doesn't).

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H.G.

answers from New York on

I use an electric beard trimmer to trim everything to maybe 1/4 inch. I like it that way. No itching from shaving, things are covered but not under a matted mess - ick for me - sorry. I feel cleaner and yes, my husband likes it too although he probably wouldn't complain either way. I trim things maybe once a month or so.

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S.S.

answers from Cincinnati on

IMO Men are welcome :-)
On to the question, I keep everything trimmed all the time. I don't like it over 1". When I shave I leave the front (think of what you see from the front w/ your legs close) but trim the sides and top and shave everything from the front all the way back.
As far as to wax or shave... If you have the $ and can handle pain reasonably well I would go for a wax at least once. You can get the strips that you warm up in your hands and put on yourself (done it myself) but if you are unsure I would recommend 'treating' your husband (LOL the actual waxing I wouldn't consider a 'treat' for myself ROFL) for valentines day?? ;-)
If you shave I would recommend taking a nice soak in a warm bath w/ bath oils before pulling the plug and shaving in the shower. I also use conditioner to shave instead of shaving cream. If you DO use shaving cream please DO NOT use any 'menthol' type creams.... you will think you lit yourself on fire! lol (personal experience)

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S.L.

answers from San Francisco on

My husband and I were just discussing this very topic.

Pre-recession, I used to go for waxing. It could be painful, and expensive, but I swim so I felt like it was beneficial in more ways than one.

During the recession, I quit going. I am very economical, but even I am unable to figure out how one would give herself a partial Brazilian lol.

Now that times are better, I am considering going back. I agree with the other posters though that looking like a prepubescent girl is not the goal. My husband said he is fine me either going or not going, so that's a relief.

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A.P.

answers from Cleveland on

I shave about once a week. Not usually any itching unless it goes unshaven for a while. I don't really have a reason for doing it.

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S.B.

answers from Providence on

I only had a modest light coloured bush which I've shaved since I was about 17. I loved the smooth, clean feeling immediately, so much so, I've never let it grow back since. I use a lady razor and soap. The first few times it was a bit red and pimply but I soon developed a tolerance to that and no problems ever since. I now do it as a regular routine every day when I shower. BFs never said anything but I don't think they were put off! LOL ;=)

DH likes it because he can see my little pink bits protruding from the cleft. (Sorry TMI) but I don't do it for him, I do it for myself.

Agree with Mandy F and Riley J. it HAS to be more hygienic. I feel that way anyway. I can't imagine ever letting it grow again

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R.W.

answers from New York on

I am late in responding but I wanted to respond to this question. I use the trimmers to completely shave it off. It is so much more fresh and clean(in the summer months when your hot and sweaty) and there is no itching with the trimmers(shavers itch). Also really turns my husband on.

A.F.

answers from Stationed Overseas on

My MIL thinks Shaven is weird and would also make her think of a prepubescent girl lol. We had this very same convo when she was visiting here in Korea after my youngest son was born. I shave down there every once in a while to please my husband. But most times I just keep it trimmed to keep it clean and not irritate the hell out of me. Shaving it all off is fine at first but gets really annoying when he starts growing back. It catches on your underwear and it itches like hell. lol this is why I only do it once in a while. But in all honesty when i read this post I laughed. I loved it. hahhaha. hope this helps.

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J.R.

answers from Dayton on

Trimmed, not shaved/waxed for this girl!! Too much upkeep and it does itch!

✤.J.

answers from Dover on

I use a trimmer with a couple of different attachments, lol. I leave the front, but take care of the sides & go down to the skin for all the rest. I just think it's prettier that way & definitely ups the sensitivity factor.

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T.M.

answers from Philadelphia on

Trimmed very low (always) and bikini line shaved when i am in a good mood :)

The natural look is too much for my husband and i. It also makes me feel dirty, especially during my period.

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B.R.

answers from Madison on

I like to have mine at about a 1/4 inch or less...I feel more clean that way!

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J.D.

answers from Cincinnati on

I only do in the summer when I'm going swimming. I shave enough to where it doesn't show through my bikini bottoms.

J.R.

answers from Phoenix on

Yes, do it. Get it waxed. Leave some in the front so you don't look like you are 10. When it grows back it does not itch, etc. I go about every 6 weeks and it costs $35. and I will do this forever, it's great.

M.D.

answers from Dallas on

Not all the time, but a few times a year... does itch pretty bad when it comes in... Yes, my husband would prefer the bald eagle... I'm 37, and I know some of my friends do it, because they told me about it in my early 20's...

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L.K.

answers from Austin on

First, I trimmed. (17 or 18)
Then I didn't want any pokies with those tiny 80's bikinis.

I started waxing the strays instead of shaving. Much better. I got terrible bumps and rashes from ANY shaving... and for any length of time it never got better. Waxing was $$ and wasn't very comfortable (especially the contortions when waxing yourself), but it was MUCH better than shaving. After my 20's I had the waxing done by a spa. It was a little hard at 1st to have another person 'there' but the spa's I went to were all VERY professional and I never felt uncomfortable with the 'wax-tech' herself.

I shaved thighs (very tiny amount of hair, but it was there) and waxed until my mid 30's. Then the bumps were terrible on my thighs and some got infected (only got thighs waxed a few times).... no shorts. ugh... that was the purpose of shaving/waxing.

A coworker mentioned laser hair removal. If it wasn't so expensive I would have done my entire lower body, but working slowly to have it all taken off. I really HATE the entire thing clear b/c I feel it does look like I'm 6 again, but really... the feel and cleanliness (I feel) are wonderful. My husband never really cared, but does say he likes this look (and feel) very much. I did have a little trouble with 'friction' with no hair to not have the cheeks rub, but all better now... and only took about a month to get used to it. (my skin is terribly sensitive)

I'm 44 now.

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M.S.

answers from Kansas City on

I will never shave there. It's dangerous (possible infections from nicks) and makes a woman look like a little girl. My husband loves me as a woman, not a little girl. Be a woman.

I.B.

answers from Saginaw on

I'm a little late on the uptake here, but I read through most of the responses, and I didn't see any mention of a wonderful product: Veet. I suppose it's like Nair. I love it. Sure it's chemical-y, but I only use it on small areas of my body, and never had a skin problem. No chance of razor burn, and no itch-factor with re-growth.

The electric shaver my second favorite option for hair removal on sensitive skin. As previously mentioned, you want to leave ~ 1/4 inch to avoid irritating the skin.

Another benefit to strategic hair removal that I haven't seen mentioned: increased pleasurable sensitivity factor. I'll say no more- just try it ;)

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